


Soap Bubbles

by mickeylover303



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-23
Updated: 2010-07-23
Packaged: 2020-05-31 17:20:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 89,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19430578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mickeylover303/pseuds/mickeylover303
Summary: Much ado about the kid with blond hair and blue eyes on the other side of the door to the house on the outskirts of Konohagakure.





	1. Part One

The fact that anyone was ringing the doorbell should have made Sasuke suspicious, should have been enough to do more than result in the casual but short-lived raised eyebrow. Never mind the fact that it was a perfectly good doorbell. The few people who knew where he lived were more prone to banging on the door repeatedly or walking in unannounced than actually making use of said doorbell.

He wasn’t expecting company. Not that he wanted it, either, but unless Naruto somehow forgot his key—which Sasuke highly doubted because he knew Naruto wasn’t that absentminded—he couldn’t imagine anyone going out of their way to find what could possibly pass as a small house hidden somewhere near the outer edge of Konoha. More importantly, because Naruto wasn’t here and probably wouldn’t be back from his scouting mission until this afternoon, Sasuke saw no reason to have his carefully planned morning interrupted.

He could count on one hand the number of people who hadn’t shunned him completely after he returned to the village. An exaggeration maybe, being that more than a few years had passed, but there weren’t many people who made contact with him on their own free will. Coincidentally, those who did were the ones who thought he was socially inept. Of course, since he was trying to be productive, he felt the situation warranted his apparent lack of ability to socialise. Though, he did admit there wasn’t much left for him to do. Just those lesson plans Iruka wanted him to look over and the scroll Kakashi had given him yesterday.

Nonetheless, Sasuke pushed aside the small pile of papers on his desk, notes on the scroll stacked neatly and separate from the folder Iruka had given him. He took off his glasses, placing them in their case before standing up and walking out of the room.

The doorbell rang again, and Sasuke felt his minor irritation at being interrupted begin to ebb away. He was alert now, something nagging at him in the back of his mind and putting him on edge. Gaze hardened, he approached the door cautiously. His abilities weren’t exactly up to par, but he could still sense it, a faint trace of chakra that was vaguely familiar.

He opened the door when the doorbell rang for a third time, frowning when he found no one on the other side. There was a sudden spike in the amount of chakra he sensed, nothing too high, but it was followed by a soft whine. Sasuke followed the sound, lowering his head slowly and nearly falling out at the sight in front of him.

It was a kid.

Judging by what he could see, it was a kid who couldn’t have been more than two or three, dressed in a plain white shirt and white shorts he seemed to have yet to grow into. The clothes had seen better days, stained with what Sasuke was presuming to be dirt. The kid’s sandals were smudged, too, traces of blue somewhat noticeable through a nearly dried coat of mud. If the kid had been running through mud recently, miraculously, the hat he was wearing was clean. One of those winter fleece hats, it was a mostly white cap with a wide black band around the bottom and matching black ears on top of it—a type of character hat Sasuke had seen some of Iruka’s students wearing before.

The kid’s head was bowed so Sasuke wasn’t able to place a face, but the kid didn’t look like anyone in Iruka’s classes. Not that anyone came to mind who would actually know where Sasuke lived. At a loss for words, reluctantly, Sasuke stayed silent. The kid was silent in return, shyly putting his arms behind his back and digging the heel of his right sandal into the porch.

However, Sasuke nearly recoiled when the kid turned his head to the side. He still couldn’t fully see the kid’s face but was able to catch a glimpse of hair peeking from beneath the kid’s hat. Something akin to dread rose in the pit of his stomach. That familiar chakra he’d felt earlier, he couldn’t ignore it now. The sensation felt heavy in the back of Sasuke’s mind, a sharp pull that made him feel he was missing something important. But there was no mistaking that familiar mop of blond hair when the kid finally raised his head and the hat fell to the ground. Wide eyes stared at Sasuke, large and just as disturbing as the recognisable marks on the kid’s cheeks.

Naruto, Sasuke wanted to say, but the name wouldn’t come. His mouth wouldn’t move, his body refusing to comply, and his thoughts too jumbled to actually do anything but stare at the kid in front of him.

Unexpectedly, the kid began to pout, expression unsure as his small hands reached to tug on Sasuke’s pants. His eyes narrowed, nose scrunched as if he was trying to assess whose pant leg he was tugging. Mouth ajar, the initial curiosity quickly turned into surprise, and the broad grin was Sasuke’s only warning before the kid launched himself at him.

Not prepared for the extra weight, Sasuke stumbled. He caught the kid on impulse but almost dropped him when the kid actually spoke. If the kid noticed, he didn’t say anything, instead settling on repeating the three words that shook Sasuke out of his stupor.

“I’m home, Sasuke.”

He almost managed to say it this time, say the only name that was coming to mind because he could feel his mouth opening, but Sasuke didn’t think it was good for anything intelligible aside from the slight choking sound coming from the back of his throat. Blinking was only slightly more intelligible, and it seemed all Sasuke could do was blink when he felt the kid clinging to his arms, using them to pull himself up and closer to Sasuke.

Sasuke wanted to make some kind of reaction, but nothing could come close to expressing the sheer sense of disbelief as to why he was currently holding a smaller version of Naruto in his arms.

Maybe it was why the kid knew his name, but it really wasn’t that much of a reassuring thought. Or maybe it was the giggle, expressing a one-sided familiarity and comfortable ease that did more than scare Sasuke. There was a slight sense of panic beginning to creep into his stomach, an unconscious reaction that was more difficult to push away than he wanted to admit.

But it couldn’t…

This kid wasn’t Naruto. Never mind that something like this was impossible, it was just…not possible. True, Naruto was expected to be back today, yet even if something did happen with Naruto, it was highly unlikely that he’d find out like this. He knew he wouldn’t have been the first to find out anyway, but still...a miniature Naruto roaming free? Sasuke highly doubted the sight would have gone unnoticed, which made him even more wary that the kid had found him with seemingly no problems.

No, the differences—as subtle as they were—Sasuke could see them. The kid’s face was a little slimmer, the bridge of his nose a little smaller, but Sasuke wasn’t sure how much credence those features were considering he was still a kid. He had the same shade of blond hair, although it was less unruly. His eyes were darker, much more so than the bright blue Sasuke was used to seeing. They were almost dark enough to be black, and the more Sasuke stared into them, the easier it was to see his face in those eyes.

Put off by the sight of his reflection, Sasuke discontinued the train of thought.

The kid, more intuitive that Sasuke would have liked, put his arm around Sasuke’s neck. His mouth was opened slightly, baring two sharp front teeth as he watched Sasuke in concern, his stare unwavering.

“Sasuke...” the kid said softly, and Sasuke mentally berated himself for even thinking this kid could have been Naruto. The chakra he’d felt earlier, that he now knew to be from the kid, did remind him of Naruto, but it wasn’t Naruto. As deranged as Sasuke thought it made him sound, it didn’t _feel_ like Naruto. However, it didn’t feel unfamiliar, either and was making the situation that much harder to take in.

The kid called his name again, and Sasuke swallowed.

Regardless of what was happening, even if he was probably just seeing things due to lack of sleep, Sasuke knew he couldn’t simply ignore the kid. Good or bad, his conscious wouldn’t let him, and he could only hope he could get the situation resolved before Naruto came back.

If he did at all.

...

As soon as he closed the door behind him, Naruto took off his mask and flung it somewhere in the general vicinity of the couch. He hobbled toward the back of the house on one foot, attempting to remove the shoe he hadn’t already taken off and barely managing not to fall over. 

“Sasuke,” he called out, voice muffled as he struggled to pull his shirt over his head. “I’m back.”

The rest of his clothes were quick to follow, leaving behind a trail of a month’s worth of dirt and grime that Sasuke would undoubtedly act prissy about later. But Naruto was tired, sweaty, and a young man who hadn’t had sex in a long time. After he was done, Sasuke would probably forget about it anyway.

He grinned when he saw the bathroom light on, a gleam in his eyes at the thought of Sasuke waiting on him with a nice warm bath. Not that it was something Sasuke would normally do. The extent to which Sasuke showed his concern when Naruto came back from a mission was saved for the bedroom, which Naruto really didn’t mind. But after a long day, Naruto had done the gesture enough for Sasuke in hopes that one day Sasuke would willingly return the favour.

He rubbed his hands together eagerly, preparing for a display that always made Sasuke roll his eyes. Licking his lips, he began to turn the handle. A smile lit his face when he found it was unlocked, saving him the hassle of trying to pick the lock like he’d tried and failed to do last time.

The grin on his face now somewhat feral, he opened the door abruptly, ready to make a dramatic entrance showcasing himself naked in his full glory—only to back away at the sight of Sasuke sitting on his knees and leaning against the side of the tub, giving a bath to a kid. It was a sight to see in itself but would have been far less disturbing if the kid didn’t look like a mirror image of Naruto from about twenty years ago.

His first reaction was to blink. Obviously, hallucinating was a sign that he wasn’t getting enough sleep. Although Naruto couldn’t say he felt particularly tired now, and the doppelganger was still there. Apparently, the doppelganger was real, too. Real enough to make a high pitched noise that echoed off the walls and effectively took Naruto out of his momentary trance.

Another shriek followed, definitely lower in pitch than the kid’s, and despite the fact that Sasuke had yet to open his mouth, Naruto didn’t want to admit said shriek was in fact his.

Quickly, he crossed his legs and covered his crotch with one hand, suddenly modest as he reached for a dark blue towel from the towel rack. The kid, for no reason Naruto could come up with, looked as surprised as (if not more than) Naruto felt, splashing water all over the floor as he clambered onto Sasuke. Clinging to Sasuke like a lifeline, his chubby arms were wrapped tightly around Sasuke’s neck, and his wet body was pressed against Sasuke’s chest.

Sasuke, Naruto noted with some frustration, was the only one who seemed to be taking the whole thing in stride, as if he’d been expecting the reactions.

“What the...what the hell, Sasuke? What is _that_?” 

“Why don’t you tell me?” Sasuke said calmly, surprisingly calm for someone who had a kid that looked like Naruto hanging on to him for dear life. But the kid seemed to be settling down, no longer screaming, and Sasuke was able to put him back into the tub.

Naruto was taken back when he saw the kid fisting the side of Sasuke’s shirt. He pursed his lips at Naruto in distaste, like Naruto was a threat to the kid and Sasuke, and there was something particularly upsetting about watching a younger version of himself acting so damn territorial.

“Well,” Sasuke said, using a washcloth to rinse a residual trail of soapsuds off the kid’s back.

“Well what? You think I had something to do with this?”

Sasuke looked at the kid and then Naruto. “He sure as hell doesn’t look like me.”

“You can’t think that…that it’s mine, can you?” Naruto asked in a somewhat panicky voice, which he couldn’t exactly hide since he was panicking at the fact there was a kid in his tub and one he couldn’t remember helping to conceive. “I mean, yeah, there were a few girls before you—you know, not that I wasn’t still thinking about you, really, only not like that—but I swear there wasn’t anything serious enough for something like…like _this_.”

With the exception of a snort, Sasuke remained silent and turned his attention back to the kid, who no longer seemed concerned with Naruto’s presence, too preoccupied with trying to make a bar of soap float in the water.

Reflecting on his poor choice of words, Naruto thought it better to change to subject before he dug himself into a deeper hole. Now wasn’t the time to bring his very much intact fidelity into the conversation, especially when there was no reason to make Sasuke question it in the first place.

“And—and it’s not one of my shadow clones,” Naruto continued. “They look like me now…not like this. I don’t even remember what I looked like then. Plus, I wasn’t even here, Sasuke. I just got back today and…” he trailed off, lines appearing on his forehead as he frowned then narrowed his eyes at Sasuke.

“What?” 

“You bastard, you got pregnant.” Naruto pointed a shaky finger at Sasuke, gripping the towel around his waist with his other hand. “And you didn’t tell me.”

Sasuke turned from the kid to stare at Naruto, looking as horrified as Naruto felt. “Dumbass,” he whispered harshly, the disbelief clear in his voice. With the back of his arm, he wiped the soapy water dripping down the side of his face. “When would I even—you know men can’t get pregnant.”

Rationally, Naruto knew it didn’t make sense before it even came out of his mouth, but it didn’t stop him from trying to impart some kind of reason to the situation, regardless of how ridiculous it sounded. A brief lapse of common sense, which he admitted he was still guilty of having from time to time. But at this point, he was almost ready to believe anything that could explain the kid.

“But, but....” Naruto started, refusing to believe he sounded like he was whining, “he looks just like me.”

“I couldn’t help but notice,” Sasuke drawled.

Confused and failing to come up with any kind of reasonable explanation, Naruto sighed. “Okay, you claim you’re smart. Tell me if you have anything better.”

“I don’t,” Sasuke said, reaching over the side of the tub to let the water out. One hand steady against the kid’s back, he motioned for Naruto to give him the towel draped over the edge of the sink. “He’s the one who found me.”

Naruto frowned again, this time more alert as he handed Sasuke the towel. He and Sasuke both had plenty of reasons to be wary when strange things happened. Konoha and neighbouring villages had been pretty quiet for a while but only because relations were so tense. Things were shaky at best, and conflict seemed unavoidable. The kid looked harmless, but that didn’t mean he was. Because the kid couldn’t have been more than three or four, it only made sense that someone else was involved. The question was who, and more importantly, what purpose would sending out a kid that looked like Naruto serve?

“What do you mean,” Naruto said, “found you?”

“The doorbell rang a few times, I opened the door, and there he was. Someone either dropped him off or somehow he knew where we live.” Sasuke paused, taking a moment to sigh again. “He called this place home, Naruto.”

“As in the house in the middle of nowhere no one is supposed to really know about? This place?”

“Yes, here.”

Naruto reflected out loud, “I guess that narrows the options of where he came from then.”

“I don’t know. He recognised me.”

“You mean…?”

“He knew my name.”

On cue, the kid started to giggle, calling out Sasuke’s name with a large smile on his face. He nodded his head and made a small noise in agreement when Sasuke asked if he was ready to get out, and Naruto could only watch the scene with uncertainty as the kid extended his arms to Sasuke. Supposedly, they just met, so why did they seem so comfortable around each other?

“Come on.” Putting his hands under the kid’s arms, Sasuke grunted and lifted him out of the tub. He placed him on the bathmat and covered the small body with the towel Naruto had given him. The kid began to wriggle in the towel as Sasuke dried him off, still wearing that same smile, which was beginning to look too familiar for Naruto’s comfort.

“Maybe it’s some kind of trick,” Naruto said, trying to convince himself more than Sasuke. Now that the initial shock was beginning to wear off, he could think more clearly, although it didn’t make the situation less surreal. “Unless you could, I can’t sense anything strange, but…I think we should go to Tsunade about this.”

“We are.” Sasuke motioned for the kid to lift his arms and wrapped the towel around him, gathering an edge and tucking it inside the front to hold it in place. “I only gave him a bath because he was dirty, and I didn’t want…” Sasuke cut himself off and shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. Just know he already brought dirt inside the house, and because I don’t want to know where you threw your clothes this time, you’ll clean that up—”

Naruto couldn’t help the somewhat horror-stricken look on his face. “What do you mean? Now?”

“—when we get back from seeing Tsunade,” Sasuke continued, ignoring Naruto. “We need to figure out what’s going on.”

“If the old hag didn’t have something to do with it,” Naruto mumbled, watching Sasuke walk toward the door with the kid in tow. The kid turned his head to look at Naruto, scrunching his nose in a gesture that would have been cute if Naruto didn’t think it was strange staring at a younger version of himself. Turning back around, the kid adjusted the towel wrapped around his chest with one hand and reached out to grab Sasuke’s hand with the other.

“Are you really that okay with this?” Naruto asked sharply.

Sasuke stilled under the threshold, the kid stopping, too and tightening his hold of Sasuke’s hand. It took him seemingly forever to speak, and the lingering silence in between made Naruto feel uncomfortable. 

“I’m not.”

Naruto didn’t believe it, and the lack of conviction in Sasuke’s voice didn’t help Sasuke’s cause. Although Sasuke could barely hold a conversation on his own with people his own age, apparently he had a knack for kids from the time spent working under Iruka. He still wasn’t the easiest person to get to know and hadn’t changed much from when he was younger, but it was amazing and frightening how kids seemed to flock to him.

In the beginning, Sasuke might not have had much of a choice, yet he hadn’t pushed the kids away, either. Or in Naruto’s case, put them off completely. Maybe it was because they didn’t know about Sasuke, or, despite what their parents told them, the kids Sasuke worked with were too young to understand. But this was something completely different, and Naruto was ready to admit it scared him that Sasuke wasn’t exactly protesting the idea of a little Naruto running around. 

“It’s not the same as working with Iruka-sensei’s kids, you know.”

“I never said it was,” Sasuke said. The kid was tugging on his hand, trying to pull him through the door, and Naruto couldn’t say it looked like Sasuke was trying to resist.

“We don’t even know _where_ he came from, _what_ he is—”

“The point is he’s here now, and we’re going to have to deal with it,” Sasuke said firmly.

Resigned, Naruto groaned. It seemed like Sasuke wasn’t going to give him much of a choice in the matter. Honestly, he wouldn’t have expected anything less. “Fine, just let me get cleaned and changed first, all right,” he called out after Sasuke and the kid disappeared into the hall.

This really wasn’t the welcome home he’d been looking forward to.

...

Apparently, Sasuke’s earlier suspicions about the kid proved to be right after all. The kid wasn’t Naruto, nor was he seemingly the result of something Naruto did, which Sasuke was only partially grateful for. At least if Naruto was behind it, he’d have a better idea of what they were dealing with. For all he knew, the kid was a distraction and part of some plot to catch them off guard. Sasuke and Naruto both had their share of enemies, Naruto more than Sasuke in last few years, but Sasuke couldn’t think of anyone who would go through something like this just to get their attention. 

He originally planned on seeing Tsunade before Naruto came back, but the kid was dirty, hungry, and Sasuke didn’t feel like facing any wild accusations of child neglect or Tsunade calling him incompetent for not being able to take care of a kid. Though, it probably wouldn’t have mattered either way.

Tsunade may have spared his life after he returned to the village, yet aside from civil necessities and a questionable obligation to Konoha, Sasuke was still on shaky ground with her. He didn’t mull over his relationship with Tsunade too much because he didn’t know how she felt about him, but it seemed their only reason for getting along was Naruto, and it was easier for her to be more openly critical of Sasuke when Naruto wasn’t involved. If he deserved it, he wasn’t sure and couldn’t bring himself to care anymore than he did at the moment. 

With Naruto in the bathroom, it was almost noon by the time Sasuke managed to get kid dried and dressed. The clothes the kid was wearing were too dirty to wear again, but it wasn’t as if he had clothes the kid’s size conveniently lying around. Since he didn’t have anything that would fit, he was forced to make do with what he had. The outfit was makeshift at best, and Sasuke did what he could to make the kid look somewhat decent.

Licking his lips in concentration, Sasuke tied the excess material of one of his black t-shirts into a knot and tucked it into the back of the kid’s orange pants, periodically taking the time to fix the rolled up sleeves that kept coming undone. The pants were actually a pair of Naruto’s old shorts rolled up to the kid’s waist. The elastic band was folded over three times to ensure the pants wouldn’t fall off, but the kid had to keep pulling them back up as they drooped to one side.

When he stepped back to admire his…work, the kid looked at him with a grateful smile.

“Finished,” the kid said, and Sasuke responded with an involuntary twitch of his mouth.

The kid held out his arms and began to turn around excitedly, which only served to make Sasuke reluctant to acknowledge the fact that he had dressed the kid. He could still see material from the too big pair of Naruto’s yellow and blue boxers sticking out from the back and silently wondered if a belt would make a difference at this point.

When Naruto finally came out of the bathroom and found them in the living room, he apparently had trouble holding back any kind of laughter when he saw the kid. Not wanting to deal with the possibility of a crying kid—he wouldn’t admit it had something to do with his pride, as well—Sasuke was more than happy to help Naruto in the form of throwing one of Naruto’s shoes at him. Unfortunately, the shoe missed as Naruto ducked into their room, but the attempt managed to quell the laughter.

The kid looked in the direction Naruto went then looked at Sasuke. “Sasuke…?”

“It’s fine.” Sasuke tried to smile, tried to put on some kind of expression to let the kid know nothing was wrong with what he was wearing, but he was finding it more difficult trying to convince himself. At least he hadn’t let the kid near a mirror. Sasuke felt bad enough, and Naruto’s reaction wasn’t helping.

“Naruto’s just…”

“Silly?”

“Yes.” Sasuke sighed in relief, not wanting to explain why Naruto was laughing at the kid. “He’s just—”

“Okay,” the kid said, not waiting for Sasuke to finish. Bare feet softly tapping against the hardwood floor, he ran the short distance from the living room to the entryway and grabbed his sandals. Walking back toward the living room, he stopped in front of Sasuke and lifted the shoes above his head. “Help me?”

Glad the kid was able to redirect his attention elsewhere, Sasuke kneeled down and put himself at eye level with the kid. “Put them on the floor first.”

“Un.” Nodding, the kid gently placed the shoes down.

“After we finish putting your shoes on, we can go,” Sasuke said, pausing when he heard footsteps coming from behind him. “Are you almost ready yet?” he called out to Naruto.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming. Let me put this towel back and find a shirt to put on,” Naruto said, eyes closed as he dried his hair with a towel. “Manage to find anything else about the brat?”

“Don’t call him that.”

“Like it’s any better to call him kid.”

Sasuke snorted but knew he couldn’t say anything about it. Partly because calling the kid, kid, really wasn’t that much of an improvement. But to Naruto, brat was probably a term of endearment, stemmed from his relationship with Tsunade Sasuke didn’t want to understand.

Naruto rolled his eyes, grabbing a shirt draped across the back of the couch. “What else am I supposed to call him? My name’s already taken.”

Sasuke eyed the shirt in Naruto’s hand. “Is that clean?”

“I’m clean,” was Naruto’s retort, his voice fading as he headed back toward the bedroom.

Sasuke sucked his teeth, quickly deeming the matter of whether or not the shirt was clean a lost cause. He turned his attention back toward the kid, who was waiting for Sasuke to him with his shoes.

“Right foot, first,” Sasuke said, holding out a shoe for the kid to step into. He cleaned the sandals earlier, and the blue previously covered with dirt was now visible. They still looked more than a little worn but would do for now considering his and Naruto’s sandals were obviously too big for the kid.

The kid placed a hand on Sasuke’s shoulder, leaning on Sasuke for balance. “This one?”

“Your other right,” Sasuke corrected, gently tapping the kid’s right leg with his finger when the kid tried to put his left foot in the sandal.

The kid stared at his feet as Sasuke made sure his foot was fully situated in the shoe. “Oh.”

“Now your left foot.”

“My left foot.” With a grin, the kid nodded at Sasuke, clearly pleased he was now able to distinguish between his left and right. Sasuke returned the grin with something that was more akin to a grimace. It was a little too awkward.

No matter how he tried to rationalise it, Sasuke couldn’t get over the fact that the kid looked so much like Naruto. Although Sasuke couldn’t remember Naruto being like this, behaving how the kid was now. Either Sasuke was too young to remember at the time, too old to not forget, or maybe he never really paid attention at all.

It wasn’t that he thought Naruto had a fling with someone else. Sasuke wasn’t that insecure about his relationship with Naruto, not anymore. Even if that were true, it wouldn’t explain how the kid knew about Sasuke, was comfortable enough to jump into his arms at first sight, and why he didn’t extend the same kind of forwardness to Naruto.

By outward appearances, the kid looked harmless, Sasuke wanted to think. But the fact remained that somehow, this kid, this smaller version of Naruto who wasn’t Naruto, knew Sasuke’s name and where he lived but nothing else. Not his name, not his age, not where he was—there was something wrong about the kid, something unnatural, and while the kid seemed innocuous on the surface, there was no telling what his presence truly meant. Until then, Sasuke couldn’t really pinpoint what felt off about the situation. 

“Sasuke…”

“Mm?" Sasuke said distractedly, trying to help the kid’s heel in the shoe.

“Thank you,” the kid said, eyes closed and smile wide. “I like Sasuke.”

Sasuke raised his head slowly. “You like me?”

The kid cocked his head to the side, narrowing his eyes in concentration before he looked at Sasuke again. He nodded in confirmation with a serious look on his face. “Yes, but Sasuke…”

Sasuke knew he had to approach this carefully. While the kid did seem to like him, he wasn’t one to talk about himself, which was odd when Sasuke usually had the opposite effect around kids. He’d only met the kid an hour ago, but he still couldn’t decide how much the kid was aware of and what he knew. Most of the questions Sasuke asked would be answered with a smile, Sasuke’s name, or an attempt to engage Sasuke in a conversation about something else that caught the kid’s interest at that moment. Some of it Sasuke could excuse with the kid having a short attention span, but he was beginning to suspect the kid was purposely being evasive.

“I…” The kid bit his lip, looking to Sasuke nervously and shaking his head.

Reaching out to pull on Sasuke’s jacket, the kid closed the distance between them, standing on his toes and wrapping an arm around Sasuke. He looked at Sasuke with an unsettling amount of unease. “I’m scared,” he whispered.

Sasuke blinked. He paused for a moment before leaning down closer to the kid, their cheeks nearly touching. “Scared of what?” he asked, voice just as soft in hopes of encouraging the kid.

“I don’t want to…Sasuke’s not—” But the kid didn’t finish, removing his arm from around Sasuke and jumping back when Naruto came in the living room. He retreated behind Sasuke, pressing his lips together and carefully watching Naruto.

“Ready to go?” Naruto asked, oblivious to conversation that almost took place.

“Make sure you lock the door,” was Sasuke’s flat reply. He ignored Naruto’s frown and conveyed as much annoyance as he could with a single glance. Even though he knew it wasn’t Naruto’s fault, it was obvious that whatever secret the kid wanted to share, he didn’t want to do so when Naruto was in the room, and Sasuke didn’t know if the kid was going to feel comfortable enough to open up again.

Sasuke took the kid’s hand, leading him to the door and leaving Naruto standing behind them.

“What’d I do this time?”

.

“Can’t say I expected to see you back so soon—not when you were so eager to get away from me," Tsunade said, decidedly more composed than when Naruto first arrived.

She stared at the kid in Sasuke’s lap, gaze travelling to Sasuke and again settling on the kid. While Naruto was laughing about the kid’s clothes earlier, he really hoped she didn’t say anything about them now. Somehow, he knew Sasuke would find a way to blame it on him, and really, there were more important things to worry about than what the kid was wearing.

“It’s not like I wanted to be back here, either, you know,” Naruto said. “I saw enough of your mug this morning.”

“The feeling is mutual, brat,” Tsunade said half-heartedly in agreement. “But what could have possibly happened since the last time I saw you?” 

“Well, it’s kind of obvious at this point, don’t you think?”

“It’s obvious that something did happen, but what’s even more obvious is that you think I had anything to do with it.”

Naruto offered her a somewhat apologetic smile. After leaving the house, he’d gone ahead of Sasuke and the kid, partly because Sasuke was upset with him for reasons he didn’t understand and partly because his imagination had run away with him while he was taking a shower. He’d ended up barging into Tsunade’s office, accusing her of being behind some maniacal revenge scheme to make little Naruto clones to drive him crazy in return for all the times he’d called Tsunade an old hag and made fun of her biological clock, which Naruto may or may not have called obsolete…more than once.

The resulting level of disbelief was an interesting sight to see on Tsunade’s face, and it wasn’t until Sasuke and the kid walked in did Tsunade manage to come up with some kind of response to Naruto’s accusation: a noticeably large vein on her forehead and a few choice words that surprised even Naruto.

When Sasuke arrived, he’d refused to look at Naruto, which Naruto figured was probably because he left without him. Instead, he’d made eye contact with Tsunade, silently daring her to say anything about the kid who had yet to let go of Sasuke’s hand. He’d somehow managed to keep a straight face when she returned the gaze with veiled interest, watching the kid.

The kid stared at Tsunade but quickly lost interest when Sasuke took a seat in the chair beside Naruto. He climbed on Sasuke’s lap, using Sasuke’s shirt to pull himself up, and rested his head on Sasuke’s shoulder.

The interaction between Sasuke and the kid came off as alarmingly normal, yet undeniably abnormal to anyone watching, and Naruto was grateful he wasn’t the only one who thought so.

Tsunade sat back in her chair. She crossed her arms and shrugged her shoulders. “Believe it or not, I have more important things to do with my time than tamper with your lives.”

Naruto knew she was being evasive, neither denying nor admitting to anything, and he wouldn’t put it past her to have at least some kind idea of what was going on. Apart from the initial shock of Naruto’s outburst and the slight hesitation after actually seeing the cause of his outburst, she was irritatingly calm about the whole thing.

“But wouldn’t you be the one to know about these things?” Naruto eyed Tsunade suspiciously and caught Sasuke doing the same. 

“Not necessarily,” she said, attention turning to Sasuke and the kid moving around on Sasuke’s lap. “But how do you fall into this, Uchiha?”

Tsunade’s voice was light, amused and slightly suggestive. Naruto and Sasuke hadn’t said anything to her about their relationship directly, more than satisfied to let her come to her own conclusions. Honestly, he thought she already knew. He and Sasuke may have only been living together for a couple of months so far, but whatever it was between them now, that had been building for as long as Naruto could remember. However, regardless if Tsunade knew about it or not, it seemed she wanted one of them to acknowledge it in front of her.

“Does it matter?” Naruto asked.

With a sly smile, Tsunade said, “Seeing how a kid that looks like you is practically joined at the hip with Uchiha, it could.”

“I don’t think this is the time to go into that,” Naruto said, aware she had already made up her mind about his relationship with Sasuke.

“Maybe another time then,” Tsunade said, somewhat thoughtfully.

“Well?” Naruto urged.

“Well what?” Tsunade said. “Tell me how you found him.”

“He came to me,” Sasuke said, and Naruto was glad he wouldn’t have to try to explain it to Tsunade. “He rang the doorbell, told me he was home, and said my name.”

“Knew where you lived and your name,” Tsunade said. “All of this happened this morning?”

Naruto nodded his head. “Yeah. That’s when Sasuke met him. I didn’t meet him until after I came home.”

“And apparently he won’t let go of you, Uchiha?”

“Something like that,” Sasuke said.

“Why would I expect otherwise,” Tsunade said evenly, although it wasn’t enough to distract Naruto from the lingering uneasiness in her eyes. She caught his questioning gaze but dismissed it with a wave of her hand. “So he looks like you. Maybe you’re looking at the wrong woman.”

Immediately, Naruto became flustered, stuttering reassurances to Sasuke about no there being no woman other than Sasuke, which he quickly took back because Sasuke was far from a woman. He couldn’t help it. Maybe it was because that now he had Sasuke and didn’t want to lose him, like he had so many times before, but it was a knee-jerk reaction. Anytime there was a possible threat to their relationship, Naruto would fall into the same pattern of hurried thinking, like what he said when he first found out about the kid and his attempts to assure Sasuke the kid wasn’t his then, either.

Rolling his eyes, Sasuke tried to pull his hand out of Naruto’s in favour of adjusting the kid on his lap. The kid was playing with Sasuke’s hair, yanking him in one direction, while Naruto, seemingly unable to let go of Sasuke’s hand, was yanking him in the other.

Impressively, Tsunade’s expression remained blank, although a bead of a sweat did find its way down the side of her face. “No mother?”

Naruto let go of Sasuke’s hand and sat up in his chair. “Even if there was a mother—which there’s not,” he added quickly, sending a side glance to Sasuke, “not to mention…”

Naruto gently rubbed his thumb against the kid’s cheek, proving the marks similar to Naruto’s own were real. “Hold still for a second, okay,” he said, the kid pulling away until Naruto finally removed his hand.

“Don’t make him cry again, idiot.”

“I barely touched him, Sasuke.” Naruto made a noise in irritation at Sasuke and pointed to the marks on the kid’s cheeks. “Happen to know anyone with that kind of birthmark running in the family? Because I seriously doubt that’s hereditary.”

Tsunade raised her eyebrows, apparently at a loss for words. She looked like she doubted the possibility herself, but then there was a flash of recognition in her eyes. It could have been nothing at all, but Naruto didn’t dismiss it.

“I’ll have to give him a full examination,” Tsunade said, “but have either of you…?”

Naruto shook his head. “We couldn’t sense anything strange. Just a regular kid that looks like…looks like me.”

“Well, while you’re here.” Tsunade looked at Sasuke. “You received the scroll assigned to you, I’m assuming?"

“Yes.”

“What scroll?” Naruto asked, looking between Tsunade and Sasuke in confusion. He didn’t appreciate being left out. While he wasn’t completely sure when it came to Sasuke’s feelings toward Tsunade, he was sure Tsunade didn’t dislike Sasuke. She cared…in her own special way, but it was still questionable territory for those two. They were similar in some ways, too many ways if Naruto thought about it, and maybe that’s why there always seemed to be a strain between them.

Ignoring Naruto, Tsunade relaxed her chair, noticeably less tense than she was a few minutes ago.

Naruto wanted to ask her more about the scroll but knew she wouldn’t answer. He’d have to corner Sasuke later. “So you’re not going to do anything about the kid?”

“What do you want me to do?”

“I…I don’t know,” Naruto admitted grudgingly. “Something?”

“Right now, I can’t think of anywhere he could go. And since Uchiha has experience, I don’t see why the kid can’t stay with the two of you. I’ll look the kid over, but for the time being there’s nothing...precarious about your situation as far as I’m concerned. Despite what you may think, I’m assuming you can handle the responsibility until further notice?”

Naruto opened his mouth, about to protest, but closed it when he realised he didn’t know what to say.

First impressions aside, he wasn’t ready for an unexpected responsibility like this, but it wasn’t as if Naruto wanted to throw the kid out, either. He wouldn’t abandon him unless they didn’t have an option. He knew firsthand what that was like, to grow up alone, and while he wasn’t comfortable with the idea of the kid living with them, he couldn’t imagine letting anyone else go through what he did when there was a way he could prevent it.

Naruto looked at Sasuke. “Well?”

Sasuke closed his eyes, sighed, and then opened them again to look at Naruto.

Naruto turned back to Tsunade. “It’s not like we have much of a choice, is it?”

“That’s up to you,” Tsunade said. “However, you’d both probably be better off if you let as few people know about this as possible.”

Mirroring Sasuke’s earlier actions, Naruto sighed. “How long is this examination going to take?”

“Depends on how long you’re willing to wait.”

“That long, huh?”

Tsunade didn’t comment but stood from her desk, slowly making her way to stand in front of Sasuke and the kid. “Are you going to let me hold him?”

Silent, if not hesitant, Sasuke complied. Naruto wanted to say that the kid wouldn’t let go of Sasuke, but, to his surprise, when Tsunade held out her hands, the kid didn’t seem too troubled by the thought of being taken away from Sasuke and let Tsunade hold him without complaint.

“Let’s see here…” Tsunade sat on top of her desk, mindful of the scrolls surrounding her as she placed the kid on her lap. “Have you already checked him for any seals, anything that stands out?”

“Sasuke gave him a bath, and I…” Naruto licked his lips, not quite wanting to relive that moment in the bathroom when he first met the kid. “That is to say—”

“Yes,” Sasuke said, saving Naruto from having to explain how he met the kid. “We didn’t find anything.”

“I don’t sense anything, either,” Tsunade said. “The most worrisome thing is having a pint-sized version of Naruto with Naruto’s abilities. Although if it wasn’t for his appearance, I wouldn’t have known any better.

“So far nothing seems out of the ordinary,” she murmured, more to herself than to Naruto and Sasuke. “If that’s the case, he’s just a kid, probably around two or three. Chakra seems normal for someone his age, maybe even on the lower end…”

Naruto looked at Tsunade, somehow taking offense at the comment, but she spoke again before he could say something about it.

“If there’s anything else there,” Tsunade continued, “for now, I can’t tell.”

“And as far as you can tell?” Sasuke asked.

Naruto looked at Sasuke strangely, following his gaze to Tsunade, who seemed to be carefully blank regarding the question. He wanted to break the growing tension, but it fell apart on its own when Tsunade hissed in pain.

Looking away, Sasuke covered his face, and Naruto winced at seeing what made Tsunade cry out. The kid was fondling one of her breasts, small hands squeezing the soft flesh as he wore a broad and shameless smile that was hard to ignore.

While Naruto didn’t claim the kid as his own, he couldn’t escape the fact that the kid looked like him, which was why he couldn’t help but feel some kind of responsibility for the kid’s actions. But especially when it was something Naruto used to and maybe sometimes secretly still thought about doing, he felt guilty all the same, and it was one of those moments when he wished the ground would swallow him whole. Even Sasuke’s cheeks were somewhat red in embarrassment.

Patiently, more so than Naruto thought possible given the situation, Tsunade pried the kid’s hand away from her breast, giving a pointed look to Naruto. “Well, as far as I can tell” she said dryly, “the brat is definitely yours.”

...

The next day, Sasuke was wary—rightfully so—about the not so subtle knocking on the door, which was hurriedly unlocked before he had a chance to reach for the knob. He was only somewhat relieved it was an impatient Sakura making use of her spare key that was only supposed to be used sparingly and not (as his luck would have it) another little Naruto, which, despite the kid’s apparent attraction to him, Sasuke was sure he wouldn’t have been able to take. 

He much less wanted to entertain the idea of finding a younger version of himself on the other side.

Without preamble, Sakura let herself inside, wearing a large, pale green and pink tote bag over her shoulder, a suspiciously wide smile on her face, and one of the most cheerful and energetic renditions of good morning that did nothing but grate on Sasuke’s ears. Quickly closing and locking the door behind her, Sakura grabbed a hold of his arm, and Sasuke could only follow haplessly as he was dragged away from the door and toward the kitchen.

Normally, he would have made some kind of protest, but he blamed his lack of response on having to stay up with a kid that did anything and everything but go to sleep last night. It wasn’t that he was unfamiliar with kids. This was far from the first time, but it was easy to forget how much attention they needed when he only spent a certain amount of time with them during the school day.

He’d been helping Iruka with the youngest groups of students in the Academy for the past two years. On paper, he was—as Iruka liked to call him—an assistant of sorts. Unofficially, the position was the most flattering upgrade from being on constant surveillance and placed on house arrest. However, it was also a big step from death or isolated confinement after being a missing-nin, much of which had to do with Naruto’s insistence.

If Iruka hadn’t been the one who had offered him the job, Sasuke would have called it an attempt to humiliate him while simultaneously, albeit slowly, integrating him back into the village with little more than what he left with. Initially, he’d been stuck with stamping smiley faces on papers and running small errands for Iruka, but after a while Iruka began to force him to help in the classroom, participate in lesson plans, actually interact with students, and Sasuke couldn’t say it was the worst thing he’d done. Five years ago, he wouldn’t have imagined himself in this position. Then again, five years ago, Sasuke didn’t expect to survive.

But while working with Iruka was an experience that hadn’t quite left Sasuke humbled, it certainly helped him learn to cope with the person he used to be and learn to accept the person he’d become. A form of rehabilitation that more or less that forced him to come to terms with himself, with his past…too many things. It was probably why most people didn’t have many qualms with the idea of him watching their kids. For the time being, Sasuke was effectively restrained, so to speak, no longer a threat, and someone people could easily look down upon. With an indefinite seal that severely limited access to his chakra and the effects of Orochimaru’s mark lingering in the back of his mind if no longer on his body, it wasn’t as if he had much of a choice.

Tsunade had seen to that, and personally, Sasuke felt she held it over his head, like a shroud of his combined self-loathing and hatred that he still wasn’t able to let go of. It was disgusting how he let her use it against him. Whether it was true or not didn’t matter. Either way, he couldn’t let go, and it had spiralled into to an almost selfish suspicion of everything she did. Yesterday was no different; though, Sasuke could say Naruto wasn’t as susceptible as he was a few years back and no longer took Tsunade’s words at face value.

But because yesterday things between Sasuke and Tsunade felt more strained than usual that even Naruto took notice of it, Sasuke had yet to bring it up, and by the time they came home, Sasuke had all but forgotten about it. The kid’s groping episode behind them, it was late, the kid was asleep, and Sasuke carried him into the guest room—that sometimes doubled as Sakura’s room—across the hall from the main bedroom. Less than half an hour later, before Sasuke even had a chance to fall asleep, he woke up to a series of slight tugs on his shirt and large dark eyes staring at him. The kid had to use the bathroom and wouldn’t do it without Sasuke present, which was great considering he and Naruto wouldn’t have to deal with that stage of getting the kid to actually aim in the toilet.

However, it seemed the kid wouldn’t go back to sleep, and it wasn’t until after midnight that Sasuke eventually dragged the kid into his bed, placing him between himself and Naruto. Truly out cold, Naruto was dead to the world no matter how many times Sasuke tried to wake him.

Only a few hours after Sasuke had fallen asleep, Naruto woke up. He also woke Sasuke in the process, complaining about the kid interrupting their morning routine, which Naruto claimed was supposed to consist of the sex that would make up for yesterday. But Sasuke couldn’t have cared less at that point because Naruto managed to sleep while Sasuke hadn’t. He of course told Naruto such and threw a pillow at Naruto before curling under the covers and closing his eyes.

Though, at least that had meant Sasuke could sleep in a little longer for once, and Naruto was pissed off enough to take out his frustration by making breakfast, which was something he rarely did. Usually, for the sake of time and not wanting to do the dishes, he put together something quick like ramen because it was more convenient, and he had yet to kick the habit.

Stifling a yawn, Sasuke let Sakura continue to lead him to the kitchen, where Naruto was sitting with the kid. Naruto was trying to teach the kid how to pick up rice with chopsticks and apparently not really going anywhere with the attempt.

“Sakura-chan,” Naruto said in surprise, at the same time the kid called out for Sasuke.

Sakura put a hand over her mouth, not doing well to hide the small gasp that escaped her. “When I first heard about it…”

“Heard about what?” Naruto said, looking to Sasuke nervously. He stood in front of the kid, unsuccessfully trying to hide him from Sakura.

Sasuke could only shrug as he sat down next to the kid, who immediately reached for him. Sakura already knew about his and Naruto’s relationship, so it wouldn’t have made that much of a difference if she knew about the kid, too. That and it was no use trying to deny the fact that there was a kid in the kitchen when Sakura had already seen him.

Sakura rolled her eyes. “I can still see him, Naruto. Besides, Tsunade-sama already told me about him. She sent me here.

“For what?” Naruto asked.

“To check on your…” Sakura began, taking a seat next to Naruto and setting her tote bag on the floor. She looked uncomfortable, struggling to the find the right word to say.

Naruto put a finger up. “Ah, before you say anything, he’s not ours, all right. No matter what this looks like.”

“ _Naruto_.” Sakura sighed. “You can’t say something like that. Not when he can hear you. He probably understands everything you’re saying.”

Sasuke could feel Sakura’s eyes on him, almost pleading, as though he should have said something. Honestly, he couldn’t categorise the kid either and was more concerned about making sure the kid was fed rather than what the kid was supposed to be to Naruto and him. Those kinds of decisions would come later, if they came at all, and Sasuke wasn’t too confident he’d be able to make them if they did.

Naruto made a noise in disagreement. “Well, it’s true. Besides, the old hag already said he was fine yesterday.”

“I wish you’d stop calling her that,” Sakura said, her voice more weary than admonishing. “Besides, it never hurts to check again, especially when it comes to children.”

“He’s still eating,” Sasuke said.

Sakura turned to the kid, who was slowly chewing a mouthful of rice, and sent an apologetic glance Sasuke’s way. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to come by so early. I just wanted to—well, you don’t mind if I stay a little while longer, do you?”

Naruto shrugged. “I cooked,” he said, motioning to the food on the table as he began to eat from a bowl he fixed for himself. “Help yourself.”

“Something edible that’s not ramen?” Sakura teased, raising her eyebrows. “From you?”

“Hey, it’s really not that bad.”

“Anymore,” Sasuke said.

“Yeah, but you still eat it,” Naruto pointed out.

Sasuke didn’t argue. Food was food as long as it was edible, and he wasn’t one to complain. He couldn’t when he didn’t have to do the work, and Naruto was in the mood to make real food.

“That’s okay,” Sakura said with a polite shake of her head. “I already ate.”

Naruto looked at her sceptically. “So you say.”

“Believe what you want, but I only came to see him for my own eyes.” Sakura smiled softly at the kid. “He looks just like a younger version of you, Naruto.”

“Hard not to notice," Sasuke said, guiding the chopsticks in the kid’s hand and helping him pick up a few grains of sticky, white rice.

“Not that he doesn’t remind me of you, Sasuke,” Sakura added quickly, and Sasuke rolled his eyes at the fact that she didn’t even hesitate to come to his defence. “He definitely has your nose and your eyes.”

“Only you would notice something like that,” Naruto said.

"Well it’s true." Sakura frowned. “Even though I don’t understand how this is possible. I still can’t wrap my mind around it.”

“Don’t try to,” Sasuke offered, not in the least trying to be helpful. Opening his mouth wide, the kid released his hold on the chopsticks, waiting to be fed, and Sasuke found himself mentally debating whether or not it would be easier to let the kid eat with his fingers.

He turned when he caught Sakura watching him, her gaze scrutinising. “What?”

“Don’t you know you’re spoiling him?” she said mischievously.

“Now that you mention it…” Naruto peered at Sasuke. “Scary, isn’t it?”

Sasuke, purposely not paying attention to Sakura and Naruto, went back to feeding the kid. He didn’t see how helping the kid eat was spoiling him. “Whatever.”

When Sasuke didn’t respond to her teasing, Sakura didn’t make another attempt. “Maybe I should just give it a little more time. It’s only been a day, and you two are taking this surprisingly well.” She paused, looking between Sasuke and Naruto. “Although I can’t decide which is more surprising, the idea of you two taking care of a child together or the idea of a little Naruto running around?”

Naruto objected with a half-hearted protest that made Sakura laugh.

“Really, I’m kidding, but despite the fact that he looks so much like Naruto,” Sakura continued, smiling widely at the kid. “I still can’t help but think he’s adorable.”

Naruto preened, disregarding the backhanded compliment. “Really, Sakura-chan? You really think the fruit of my loins—that is, theoretically speaking, I mean, if he was—is adorable?”

“It’s because he reminds me of both you and Sasuke. Speaking of which, what’s his name?”

“He doesn’t have one,” Naruto said, unprepared for the sudden pain in the back of his head that followed.

“Don’t be stupid, Naruto,” Sakura said, and Sasuke winced at the sudden rise in her voice. “Of course he has a name.”

“T-t-t-t-t….” Naruto gasped, the noise dissipating into a hissing sound as he began to rub the back of his head. “What’d you do that for?”

Sakura looked at Naruto and shook her head in disappointment. “Have you even asked him?"

Naruto let out a pitiful groan but otherwise looked unhurt. Sasuke knew Sakura was well aware of her strength, so he doubted Naruto wasn’t just being dramatic.

“Of course we did,” Naruto shot back. “But he just ignores us. Even Sasuke. Watch.” Waving a hand in front of the kid’s face, Naruto asked, “Hey, kid, what’s your name?”

The kid made a displeased face, shoved the hand away, and returned his attention to Sasuke and his food.

Naruto shrugged his shoulders. “See?”

“Maybe he’d respond to you better if you didn’t call him kid,” Sakura said flatly.

Rolling his eyes, Sasuke decided to intervene before he fulfilled the urge to kick both of them outside. “Considering the circumstances, he may not even have one. But if he does, he’ll probably say something sooner or later.”

Naruto nodded. “And that’s what I said.”

“No, it wasn’t.”

“Che. What difference do a few more words make?” Naruto brushed the comment aside with a wave of his hand. "But I’m telling you the kid is picking favourites. It’s not like he doesn’t already tell Sasuke everything else, but I pay half the bills for this place, too.”

“Like paying bills has anything to do with it.”

“Sasuke _…_ ” Naruto rested his head on Sasuke’s shoulder, voice muffled in the fabric of Sasuke’s shirt as he tried to make room for himself without pushing the kid off Sasuke’s lap. “Are you trying to start something?”

“Later.” Sasuke grunted, nudging Naruto away with his shoulder. “Get off me, Naruto. I’m trying to make sure the kid eats.”

Interrupting the two, Sakura broke into a small fit of laughter. “You two are such…such boys.”

“Men,” Naruto corrected, separating himself from Sasuke. “Men, is what you meant to say.”

Shaking her head, Sakura reached for Naruto’s hand but directed her gaze to Sasuke. “But age doesn’t make that much of a difference, does it?” She looked at him fondly, nostalgic for a time that no longer existed, and Sasuke could almost remember the Sakura he left behind when they were thirteen.

“Sakura-chan...” Naruto looked between the two of them, his concern causing Sakura to pull her hand away from Naruto’s.

“Please don’t mind me,” she said quickly, letting go of Naruto’s hand and passing off the slight glassiness of her eyes with a forced laughter. “I suppose I should know better than to expect the two of you to change, though, right?”

There was a renewed smile on her face that took away from her previous mood. “You said he doesn’t have a name...wouldn’t it make sense to at least give him one? And I don’t mean the first thing that comes to mind. You have to think—”

“Mostly, we call him kid,” Naruto said. “Sometimes, bra—”

Sasuke kicked Naruto under the table, the action not interfering with him helping the kid finish the rest of his food. “I told you not to call him that.”

“Damn it, Sasuke.” Naruto hissed in pain, nursing his ankle. “I wasn’t being serious.”

Sakura looked at Sasuke. “Does he really...?”

Sasuke was almost surprised Sakura even needed to ask. She knew Naruto almost as well as he did. “Yes.”

“Don’t side with that abusive bastard, Sakura-chan.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t behave so harshly around him,” Sakura suggested as she watched the kid, who seemed oblivious to anything that didn’t have to do with eating. It caused Sasuke to snort, considering she had no problems calling Naruto stupid and hitting him.

“See?” Naruto looked at Sakura in exasperation. “This is exactly what I’m talking about. I know I’m not the best with kids, but it’d be nice if both of you didn’t hold it against me.”

“It’s not a matter of taking sides,” Sakura said, trying to reassure him. “And no one is holding anything against you. Not to mention you can’t just keep calling him...kid for the rest of his life.”

Naruto groaned, mumbling about something Sasuke was choosing not to pay attention to.

“Look, I know you mean well and all, but we’re just not ready for this kind of stuff. We don’t know anything about...” Naruto glanced at Sasuke. “Okay, so maybe I’m not ready for this kind of stuff.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Naruto,” Sakura said. “I don’t think anybody is prepared for something like raising a child. I probably wouldn’t have said something like this before, but it’s not like Sasuke is perfect at something like this, either, and at least you kind of have a head start, right?”

Naruto sighed. “Well, I guess…” he said, trailing off into a brief lag of conversation that was picked up by Sakura.

“Hey, Sasuke…”

Sasuke turned to face a surprisingly nervous looking Sakura.

“Since he’s almost finished eating, do you mind…?” Sakura took a deep breath and pursed her lips. “May I hold him?”

Sasuke raised his eyebrows, catching Naruto doing the same out of the corner of his eye.

“Sakura-chan,” Naruto began hesitantly, “I’m not sure…”

“I promise I’ll be careful,” Sakura said, reaching out with the intention of picking up the kid. “Naruto and Sasuke haven’t given you a name, but I’m just going to call you Aka-chan, if that’s all right with you,” she cooed. “You’re just so—”

Fervently, the kid began shaking his head, pulling away from Sakura’s outstretched arms and clenching his hands around the gathered material of Sasuke’s shirt. Although he anticipated the kid’s reaction, Sasuke was unable hide a groan at the slight kick unintentionally aimed at his stomach. At least the kid wasn’t crying like he did when he first saw Naruto.

Sakura recoiled at the kid’s unwillingness to go to her, and Naruto looked at her apologetically. “That’s kind of what happens when you’re not Sasuke or don’t have big breasts. Not that your breasts are exactly small, or I even look at your breasts enough to tell, but…”

If Sakura minded the fact that Naruto was openly discussing the size of her breasts, she gracefully ignored it and settled on leaning back in her chair. She cleared her throat, her cheeks slightly pink from her embarrassment at being rejected by the kid.

“Well, if you had any worries before, I can definitely assure you he’s your kid, too, Sasuke,” she said dryly. “Lack of social skills included.”

In that obnoxious way of his, Naruto laughed at her response, overtly boisterous, and Sasuke barely resisted the urge to kick him under the table again. He wasn’t bothered by what Sakura said but rather Naruto’s reaction to it.

“Yeah, I’m still trying to decide whether or not that’s a good thing. A kid that looks like me but with Sasuke’s attitude could be bad for my reputation,” Naruto said jokingly but backed away from the table when he noticed the look he received from Sasuke and the similar expression on the kid’s face, which was offset by the grains of rice sticking on his bottom lip. Naruto smiled sheepishly. “I mean, not that it’s a bad thing, you know, because it’s uh…it’s uh…”

Sakura snorted. “You should probably stop talking now.” 

Naruto closed his mouth, and while he was no longer laughing, he still had a smile on his face.

“Oh,” Sakura said suddenly, eyes widening. “And before I forget…” She picked up the tote bag she placed on the floor earlier and set it in her lap. “I brought some things I thought you two might like. Of course, you’ll have to go out and get your own. Until then, I don’t know what size he is, but hopefully this will be okay.” She placed two pairs of small pants on table, followed by three small shirts, a pair of socks, and a light green plastic turtle with a dark brown shell.

“My cousin still has his old clothes in the house. My aunt kept it for him, even after such a long time. These are just a few things to get you started. I know it’s not new, and it’s not much, but...”

“Sakura-chan…” Carefully, Naruto put an arm around Sakura, only to be thrown back into his chair when she lashed at him.s

“I absolutely refuse to go shopping for you when something like this is your responsibility. So don’t ask me to do it for you.”

The side of his mouth twitching, Naruto gaped at her fearfully, raising an arm to cover his face in a protective gesture. “How did—how’d you know I was going to ask?”

...

It turned out Sakura couldn’t find anything wrong, but Naruto had a feeling she’d only used her medical experience as an excuse to see the kid. She didn’t seem angry, though, about the kid’s reaction to her. She was more amused than anything. After seeing that the kid was fine, she helped herself to the food that she turned down earlier, taking a plastic container out of the cabinet to put the food in and take home so she would, as she put it, have something to eat when she didn’t feel like cooking.

Borrowed container in hand and tote bag over her shoulder, Sakura then left with a suspicious looking smile, purposely ignoring Naruto’s pleas of her not to tell anyone else about the kid as she let herself out the door. Sasuke didn’t seem to care that Sakura probably wouldn’t keep her knowledge of the kid to herself. And comforted only by a small bowl of cold rice, Naruto had no choice but to mull over the idea that it was becoming more and more likely the kid was going to become a permanent addition in his life.

At least the kid didn’t cry around Naruto anymore, which was a feat in itself considering it’d only been a day since the screaming incident in the bathroom. But the kid was surprisingly complacent. As long as he knew Sasuke was around, he was even agreeable with Naruto, going as far as calling Naruto by name and letting Naruto feed him this morning while Sasuke was still asleep.

In a way, it was funny how the kid seemed reluctant to let Sasuke out of his sight. Cute possibly, and it would have been more amusing if that didn’t mean Naruto couldn’t get Sasuke alone.

After Sakura left, they’d had what Naruto referred to as a lazy day. The kind of day he took for granted as a kid. It was just the right amount of humidity to be comfortable, all the windows in the house open and the cool breeze that would tickle his skin just enough so it wouldn’t be too hot. He was free to forget about that mission report he still had to finish, what he’d seen during the mission that made an outbreak of war between the hidden villages seem that much more inevitable—free to lounge on the couch with Sasuke and pretend it was only just the two of them until he had to face reality tomorrow.

Except, in the reality now, what was supposed to be just him and Sasuke on the couch turned into him and Sasuke plus one on the couch. The kid ended up sleeping in between them, snoring pretty loudly for someone his size and almost loud enough to drown out the TV.

And that was how the rest of the day had passed, too, with the kid’s head in Sasuke’s lap, his short legs extended and feet pushing against Naruto’s thigh, seemingly trying to keep some kind of distance between Naruto and Sasuke despite the progress Naruto thought he’d made with the kid during breakfast. Surprisingly, throughout most of it Naruto found himself staring at the kid, having reoccurring moments where he couldn’t look away from that round face with those dark eyes. Because, ignoring the hair and the cheeks, the kid actually did look like Sasuke, especially from the side. He looked a lot more like Sasuke than Naruto initially realised. If he and Sasuke could actually have a kid of their own, he or she would probably have looked pretty similar to the kid who took up way too much space on the couch.

It was disturbing, more so that he was even thinking about something like that, and, nine hours later, Naruto still couldn’t get the scenario out of his mind.

Because that was the real problem he had with the kid and why he felt so conflicted with the kid being so close to Sasuke.

No, Naruto wasn’t jealous of a kid who happened to look like him and seemed to be permanently attached to Sasuke. And in no way was he beginning to draw parallels between himself and the kid. Yes, the kid made him feel uncomfortable, anxious, so many things at once, but it was Sasuke’s reaction to the kid that really made him nervous.

He prided himself on being the only who knew so much about Sasuke. He was used to being the only one Sasuke could see, and maybe over the years he had taken advantage of the fact that Sasuke really didn’t have anyone else beside him. But this was one thing he didn’t know, the one thing he was forced to admit where he wasn’t sure about Sasuke’s stance, and Naruto couldn’t say he appreciated it.

They hadn’t really talked about having kids. Biologically, they couldn’t have any, and adoption hadn’t really come up, either. It was something Naruto preferred to avoid since the subject of having kids also brought up the issue of how long their relationship would last. It was like a taunt string between them; they both knew it was there but were afraid to pull at it in case it snapped. While he wasn’t looking forward to having a kid anytime soon, even if he could, Naruto hadn’t looked that far into the future anyway. But because the subject of having kids hadn’t really come up, Naruto didn’t know how Sasuke felt about it.

Two days ago, Naruto wouldn’t have thought about it—that despite Sasuke’s experience working with Iruka, having kids would ever be an issue for them. But after seeing how Sasuke seemed so at ease with the kid, after seeing Sasuke in that face that held so much in common with Naruto’s own, Naruto could no longer claim he knew Sasuke as well as he once thought he did. 

“And what does how the kid looks have to do with it?” Sasuke asked, rolling over from his position on the bed to face Naruto.

“Doesn’t that—I don’t know—bother you?” Naruto said. “Or shouldn’t you at least be bothered by it?”

Sasuke frowned. “Are you trying to get out of this?”

“No,” Naruto said loudly, lowering his voice when he remembered the kid was sleeping in the room across from them. “I mean, no, but come on, Sasuke.”

“You know I have a mission in a few days.”

“You can’t really expect me to look after the kid on my own.”

Sasuke shot a disapproving look at Naruto. “I’m not repeating myself.”

“It’s freaking me out, okay. Is that what you wanted to hear? Because it sure as hell isn’t making me comfortable having him around.”

Slowly, in a voice that was almost threatening, Sasuke said, “Deal with it.”

However, far from intimidated, Naruto narrowed his eyes. “Let’s just put it this way. Who’s going to take care of the bra—kid, when you’re gone, huh? He won’t go to anyone else except the hag, and that’s only because of her—”

“You seem to be forgetting that you live here, too; therefore, he’s not just my responsibility. Besides, you’re the one he looks like.”

“Yeah,” Naruto reluctantly agreed. It wasn’t exactly something he could deny, but that wasn’t the problem. “But the brat only likes you, and it’s not like I can drop him off with someone else while you’re gone.”

“I already told you not to call him that.”

Naruto sighed, not understanding why Sasuke was so picky about the name situation or lack thereof when it was the kid himself that Sasuke should have been more concerned about. “It’s a low-ranked mission anyway. I’ll talk to Tsunade again, and we’ll figure something out. Okay?”

“It doesn’t matter how demeaning it is. You know why I have to go.” Sasuke’s eyebrows were furrowed, features tense. It was a subtle shift in expression, but it was enough that Naruto could see he was upset. “And you can’t let me have…" Scoffing, Sasuke turned away from Naruto. “I’m not going through this with you.”

“Sasuke…” Feeling contrite, Naruto bit his lip. He knew he wasn’t being fair by dumping his own insecurities on Sasuke. The mission was just delivering a scroll, but it was the first mission Sasuke had since he’d left Konoha.

Honestly, after being forced to come back, Naruto didn’t know what made Sasuke stay. Sometimes, he wanted to think he was the reason, although he wasn’t that conceited. Part of the reason maybe, which was more than good enough for him. But the day he found Sasuke, the day Sasuke finally came back, Sasuke had wanted Naruto to kill him. Not fighting to his full potential, Sasuke was asking to die, and Naruto had been so angry at the time that he almost did kill Sasuke. Naruto was sure Sasuke would have died then if Kakashi hadn’t found them, but Naruto could only remember blacking out and waking up next to Sasuke a few days later.

It’d been five years since then, five years and while Sasuke hadn’t exactly become the most modest person in that time, he had taken a sizeable blow to his pride by staying here trying to make up for his own past mistakes in addition to the faults of his family on his shoulders. His name and reputation were shattered. The people who’d once said he held so much promise now couldn’t be bothered to spit at him. But Sasuke…

So Naruto did understand how important that scroll was. He understood it wasn’t the scroll itself but that Sasuke would be delivering it as a representative of Konoha, something he hadn’t been in a long time.

“Look…” Naruto sighed. “I’m sorry, all right.”

After a substantial pause, the sheets rustled as Sasuke turned back around. He didn’t seem too impressed with Naruto’s apology. 

Despite the annoyance on Sasuke’s face, Naruto still took it as a sign of being forgiven if only because Sasuke hadn’t ignored him completely. He still had his questionable moments, true, but Naruto could be perceptive from time to time, and fortunately it was something Sasuke realised, too, without either of them having to bring it out in the open.

“I do get it. It just wasn’t supposed to come out that way.”

“You’re still missing the point.” 

"No, I’m not missing the point." Naruto said steadily, repositioning himself on the bed so that he was straddling Sasuke. Leaning closer, he snorted at the bored look on Sasuke’s face. “Of course, I’m not saying that you have to believe me or anything.”

“Already that sure of yourself?”

“Well…as a matter of fact, I’m so sure,” Naruto began playfully, “that I’m going prove to you just how much I’m not missing the point.” He held Sasuke’s cheek in his palm, the calluses on his hand resting against soft skin.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. “Since when?”

“Since I’m the only one who really understands you,” Naruto said, punctuating each word with a chaste kiss on Sasuke’s face.

Seizing a fistful of Naruto’s hair, Sasuke pulled Naruto away from his face. His eyes peered into Naruto’s, challenging Naruto’s words. “You think so?”

Naruto kept Sasuke’s gaze, barely able to suppress a whimper when Sasuke pulled on his hair again. It wasn’t the first time Sasuke had done it, but it hurt. It was painful to the point he was almost convinced he’d be missing strands of hair when he looked in the mirror and Sasuke knew it, too because he pulled hard enough that Naruto felt the blood rushing to his scalp.

But then Sasuke let go and cupped the back of Naruto’s head. He pulled Naruto back down with a harsh jerk, crushing their lips together, and Naruto let out a moan when Sasuke opened his mouth.

They drew back from the kiss too soon, and Sasuke looked up at him with a smirk, placing his arm around Naruto’s neck. “Still sure?”

“…yeah, I’m still sure,” Naruto breathed. Their faces were too close without touching, Naruto’s lips hovering over Sasuke’s, the distance between them almost nonexistent, and Naruto curled his toes when Sasuke wrapped a leg around his waist.

He stilled, trying his best not to move as Sasuke tightened his hold around him. To let go now would be too quick, too embarrassing considering he’d just gotten hard, and something Sasuke would never let him live down.

Swallowing, he lowered his head on Sasuke’s shoulder, inhaled and then exhaled. He couldn’t believe he was already sweating. The room felt incredibly damp, like he’d been huddled under a sheet with Sasuke the whole time, but instead the sheet was clinging to his skin, trapped between his back and Sasuke’s leg. He could feel the moisture from his body seeping into the thin material. The sheet was making him hot, making the friction between him and Sasuke that much more unbearable, and even though he wanted nothing more than to get it off, Naruto was almost afraid to move. Every muscle was clenched, his body tight, and he hissed when Sasuke lifted his hips and brushed his erection over Naruto’s stomach.

Naruto had forgotten how long a month without Sasuke actually was, had almost forgotten how much he missed this. The warm breath in his ear, the fingers pressing against the nape of his neck, and damn if just being this close to Sasuke was all it took to get off. 

Gritting his teeth, he used his weight to press Sasuke back into the bed, enjoying Sasuke’s gasp of surprise but silently wondering how long he’d be able to keep Sasuke down. He moved further in between Sasuke’s legs, slipping his hand beneath Sasuke’s shirt.

Seeing he wasn’t the only one tense, Naruto smiled into the juncture of Sasuke’s neck when Sasuke arched against him. His fingers trailed down Sasuke’s body slowly, light touches on sensitive skin as he traced a line to the small of Sasuke’s back. Cheeks flushed, he thrust into Sasuke, pinning him to the bed when his fingers reached Sasuke’s briefs. Hand lingering around the waistband, he paused, hissing when Sasuke returned the thrust and wrapped his other leg around Naruto.

A minute couldn’t have gone by, but Naruto had held out longer than he thought he would. He was close now, a few-more-seconds-and-he-was-done kind of close, and Naruto didn’t think he could keep it in anymore with the way his erection kept rubbing against Sasuke’s. It was like his first time with Sasuke all over again, when Naruto was too excited to not rush into it, and the only thing he could think about was how good it felt. How good it was to—

“…Sasuke?”

Like he’d been burned, Naruto immediately scrambled away from Sasuke, nearly rolling off the bed. That voice was more than enough to deflate any desire to have sex, and apparently it was enough to take Sasuke out of the mood, too.

His erection waning, Naruto looked in the direction of the source of the interruption. He distinctly remembered closing the door before he got into bed. Now it was wide open, the light from the hallway flooding into the room, and the kid was standing expectantly in the doorway.

It was almost embarrassing getting caught in the act by the kid, and Naruto was grateful he hadn’t removed the sheet that was covering his back. What he and Sasuke were doing was not something he wanted to explain to the kid if the kid thought to ask. The kid was already wary of when Naruto got too close to Sasuke, and sex was as physically close as two people could get.

“Sasuke?” the kid called again and took a tentative step toward the bed. He was wearing one of Naruto’s old shirts, dragging the bottom across the floor as he put another foot forward.

Sasuke muttered a curse before running a hand through his hair, pushing away the strands that clung to his forehead. He put his legs over the edge of the bed, and the mattress dipped when Sasuke stood.

“Sasuke, I need…” Seeing Sasuke out of the bed, the kid walked a little faster, small feet making pattering noises on the floor and stopping right before he bumped into Sasuke. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

He extended his arms upward, and Sasuke hesitated before sighing and picking the kid up.

Naruto groaned and let himself fall back on the bed. His head hit the pillow with a soft and far from satisfactory thud.

...

By the third the day, Sasuke knew it was only a matter of time before more people discovered he and Naruto were living together. He expected it. If the last two days were any indication, half of Konoha would be aware of it by the end of the week, as well as his relationship with Naruto, which he and Naruto had somehow managed to keep a lesser known secret for almost two years. Not that many of the villagers cared much for anything that had to do with Sasuke anyway. Even so, he could ignore the scrutiny. It was a learned skill that seemed to only better with time.

Yet he didn’t anticipate the fact that he and Naruto were taking care of an unknown child, possibly maybe even taking him in as their own in the future, would garner such...positive attention from someone like Kakashi or cause such a reaction from someone like Iruka, who was currently hunching over, sagging in one of the living room chairs. While Kakashi seemed impervious, sitting comfortably in the other chair, Iruka’s head was his in hands, probably in an attempt to seek some kind of futile refuge. Because to Sasuke, who was stuck sharing the couch with Naruto, Iruka looked as if he thought the world would end at any given moment.

At least this was a chance to give Iruka those papers and lesson plans. It was one less thing to worry about, no matter how insignificant it seemed compared to the current situation. And then there was his upcoming mission delivering that scroll. It wasn’t as if he was going to be a high-ranked ninja again anytime soon. With his limited used of chakra, he was nothing more than an errand boy for the time being, but he still had some semblance of pride not to take it. However, Sasuke was beginning to feel more apprehensive about it now that there was a kid sleeping in his room, seemingly taking up more than half the space in the bed despite only coming up to a little over Sasuke’s knees. 

Of course, Kakashi was apparently beaming and taking the information of the kid very well. Too well for what was left of Sasuke’s sanity. Iruka still may have had qualms about Sasuke and Naruto’s relationship, but Kakashi was more or less indifferent and sometimes disturbingly supportive.

“I think he’s still reeling from the shock,” Kakashi said, trying to explain Iruka’s reaction and patting Iruka’s back none too gently.

Sitting up, Iruka placed his hands on his knees, shrugging off Kakashi’s less than helpful hand on his back. “You’re more excited about this than you should be,” he said, narrowing his eyes at Kakashi. Unfortunately, it was doing the opposite of intimidating Kakashi, who only seemed to be enjoying Iruka’s apparent discomfort.

“But it’s such a happy time,” Kakashi said, a hint of enthusiasm Sasuke immediately deemed as inappropriate creeping into his voice. “And it’s also the most ideal time to explore important matters. For instance, something I think we should discuss is whether I should play the role of uncle or the very good family friend.”

“Neither,” Sasuke answered without hesitation. 

Naruto nodded his head in agreement. “For once, I agree. The kid doesn’t need a perverted figure like you in his life.”

Sasuke shot a deliberate look at Naruto. The memory of the kid shamelessly groping Tsunade was still too fresh in his mind. “You mean another one.”

Naruto bristled and turned to Sasuke. “What’s that supposed to mean, huh?”

“Hmm...that is true, isn’t it,” Kakashi said, placing a finger on his covered left cheek. “Be that as it may, I think I prefer the role of uncle.”

Closing his eyes, Iruka pinched the bridge of his nose. “I cannot believe you.”

“But aren’t uncles more likeable?”

“Kakashi...”

“Don’t tell me you’re not at least curious,” Kakashi said, his visible eye closed. Sasuke could imagine that ever-present, irritating grin hiding beneath his mask. “It really must have been quite the pregnancy.”

Sasuke knew better than to give credence to Kakashi’s teasing. However, he also found it hard to ignore the twitch in his right eye when he saw Kakashi blatantly staring at him, eyes roaming up and down Sasuke’s figure and decidedly settling on Sasuke’s stomach. In addition to the intermittent twitching, the increasing desire to hit Naruto clashed with what little patience he had left when Naruto burst into laughter, reminding Sasuke of Naruto’s mindless accusation earlier of him being pregnant.

Naruto reached to touch Sasuke’s stomach, but Sasuke grabbed Naruto’s wrist and squeezed it hard, somewhat enjoying the small but still noticeable wince from Naruto.

“Do not,” Sasuke said darkly, “ _touch_ me.”

However, despite the brief display of pain of his face, Naruto had yet to stop laughing, which in turn further encouraged Kakashi.

“And honestly, Sasuke, I wasn’t convinced you’d ever find a wife to take care of you, much less one to give you a son.”

Naruto looked at Kakashi, laughter quickly ceasing. “Hey, are you calling me a girl?”

Sasuke squeezed Naruto’s wrist a little tighter but let go when the action was no longer affecting Naruto. It was easy to tell Kakashi was doing this on purpose, yet Naruto seemed to be missing the point.

Sighing, Iruka, the seemingly only other sane person in the room apart from Sasuke, somehow found the patience to speak. “This is definitely not the time to joke around. The situation needs to be taken seriously.”

Naruto straightened on the couch. “But we’re not—”

“I’m not sure I even know where to begin. Mindful of the fact that no one knows how this happened and has no clue as to how to explain it…” Iruka held up one hand, stopping Naruto before he had a chance to interrupt. “You two being together isn’t any of my business, I know. But I think...I think you’re both too young to take care of a child.”

Sasuke withheld from making any remark and nudged Naruto to do the same, anticipating his need to speak. He and Naruto were 23 and 22 respectfully, and while he’d admit that Naruto’s grand introduction of “Don’t wake the brat because he’s sleeping—I mean kid, don’t wake the—stop hitting me, Sasuke, I didn’t mean to call him brat again” with an accompanying extension of Naruto’s arm toward the bed where the kid was sleeping, wasn’t the best way to make a good first impression on their relationship with...the kid, it’d been a considerably long time since either of them saw themselves as children.

“And Sasuke, I know you do well with children. I’ve seen you—but your own?” Iruka shook his head, but Sasuke didn’t allow himself to mistake the gesture for pity. “You don’t even know his name. You’re not even sure he has one, and you call him _kid_. Among other things,” he added pointedly while looking at Naruto.

“Iruka-sensei…”

Sasuke nudged Naruto again, hoping Naruto could refrain from being defensive just this once. Although Iruka was being the voice of reason and Sasuke could almost say he appreciated the concern, he just wanted Iruka to finish so he would leave. He couldn’t recall asking for a lecture and didn’t need yet another person to look down on him.

Naruto, unfortunately unable to infer any of this, ignored Sasuke. “We didn’t even know about him until Saturday.”

“It’s Monday,” Iruka said. “You’re telling me the two of you changed your minds that quickly in a couple of days?”

“Yeah, well…” Naruto scratched the back of his neck. “At least he’s already potty trained.”

“Which brings me to my point that neither of you is ready for such responsibility,” Iruka said in exasperation. “You can’t even take care of yourselves, and you’re prepared to take care of a child suddenly thrown into your lives?”

“Then what do you suggest we do?” Naruto asked, his own frustration about the situation beginning to the get the better of him. “Give him to someone who doesn’t want him, people who don’t even know him when he already has...”

“Naruto…”

“Regardless of what our situation is, we both know he doesn’t have anywhere else to go, and obviously he doesn’t want to leave Sasuke. That wouldn’t be fair to the kid, and it definitely wouldn’t be fair to Sasuke,” Naruto said, looking to Sasuke for confirmation.

With the attention drawn to him, Sasuke froze at the words, finding it one of those rare occasions where he couldn’t meet Naruto’s eyes. He agreed with Iruka that the circumstances were sudden; though, in such a short period of time, maybe he’d more or less subconsciously accepted responsibility for the kid. But had Naruto really seen that much into it? Or was it that Sasuke had dropped his initial apprehension about the kid so quickly?

On some level Sasuke did acknowledge there was something wrong about how easily the kid was making the transition into their lives. It was like revisiting an obviously wrong puzzle piece that suddenly fit. He couldn’t say what, but the more time he spent with the kid, the more fleeting the feeling became, and truthfully, he couldn’t be sure if it was anything all.

That was even more unsettling than his obligation to the kid, but if that wasn’t the case…

Sasuke turned his head away slightly, catching Kakashi watching him with a calculating expression on his face. He felt Naruto’s gaze, as well, Naruto’s eyes narrowing in concern, but otherwise Naruto didn’t say anything about Sasuke’s lack of response.

Wryly, Naruto said, “Do you think we should give him up, Iruka-sensei?”

“You know that’s not what I meant, Naruto,” Iruka said, picking up on Naruto’s annoyance. He reached to put a hand on Naruto’s knee but then retracted the hand as if it were a misplaced gesture.

It was a touchy subject for Naruto, for all of them to various extents, and something Iruka understood too well.

“Maa, maa, Umino-san,” Kakashi said, purposely referring to Iruka by his family name when he knew Iruka wasn’t too fond of anyone close to him doing so. It figured he would take that exact moment to break the palpable tension, which, for once, Sasuke was grateful. “Don’t you think you’re worrying about this a little too much?”

Iruka spluttered, trying to come up with a suitable response. “I’m worrying too much?”

“If you think so.” Nodding his head, Kakashi tried to placate a dumbfounded Iruka with a gentle pat on the shoulder. “Besides, Naruto and Sasuke have a tendency to make things work out. Don’t you two agree?”

There was a burgeoning smile on Naruto’s face. “Yeah,” he said softly, reaching to hold Sasuke’s hand. Sasuke put a little more space between himself and Naruto but didn’t brush off the soppy demonstration. He couldn’t, not when he could see Kakashi still watching him carefully. “And you wouldn’t expect any less from us, right?”

“And yet again, you make me the bad guy.” Iruka sighed. “Since when has pointing out the truth been such a disagreeable thing?”

“I never said it was,” Kakashi said. “Actually, I agree with you.”

“Oh?”

“Of course, to be so young and to have the responsibility of taking care of a child, your lives suddenly no longer ahead of you.” With a cheerful gleam in his eye, Kakashi turned his attention toward Naruto and Sasuke. “Ah, I wonder how that’s going to work out."

Releasing his hold on Sasuke’s hand, Naruto looked at Kakashi in abject horror. “That’s not a very inspiring thing to say.”

...

After Iruka and Kakashi left, Naruto had gone outside. Not that he needed the time to think, but it was obvious Sasuke was going to be tight-lipped about whatever was making him more pissy than usual, and Naruto didn’t feel like trying to drag it out of him. Not now. Things were already tense between them, having to deal with the kid and all, and since Naruto couldn’t actually engage in one of his preferred outlets to vent his frustrations for the time being, he’d rather take a walk than get into a fight with Sasuke.

They hadn’t had one in a while, nothing that didn’t have to do with words anyway, and any past physical confrontations Naruto didn’t want to think about. Disagreements about small stuff that they’d both forget about the next day sometimes, but that was part of any relationship. The last real fight had been about Naruto blurting out that he wanted to move in with Sasuke while they were having sex. Although that probably had more to do with a badly timed confession, which Sasuke responded to just as badly if not worse, and Naruto’s hurt disguised as irritation because of Sasuke’s reaction. But this time…

Putting his hands in his pockets, Naruto sighed. He was almost back home, but maybe he did need to think alone after all.

For being the supposed emotionless bastard people called him, Sasuke carried a hell of a lot of excess emotional baggage. It took a long time to get Sasuke to let Naruto in, let him get closer than arm’s length, and it was tricky for Naruto to know when to push and when to back off so Sasuke wouldn’t try to drive him away. Far from being easy, Naruto had put a considerable amount of effort into making Sasuke see that he didn’t have to rely on himself all the time—that he could rely on Naruto, too.

So it only made sense that Naruto was concerned about Sasuke being so subdued earlier and saw it as a possible setback. Or maybe subdued wasn’t the right word. Not really, but just harder to read than usual. Despite not being sure about how Sasuke felt about the kid, Naruto still considered himself pretty well-versed in picking up on the slight shifts in Sasuke’s emotions, and yeah, it bothered Naruto that this was another example of when he couldn’t.

Sasuke had yet to make eye contact with him since their conversation with Iruka and Kakashi. The avoidance was subtle, Sasuke not refusing to look at him but always looking past him, and Naruto was still trying to figure out what he did this time. If it was about what Naruto said to Iruka, that it wouldn’t be fair to separate Sasuke and the kid, he couldn’t see what the problem was. The kid had already attached himself to Sasuke. Iruka might have seemed against the idea of Sasuke and him taking caring of the kid, but Naruto knew Iruka could see the connection between Sasuke and the kid, too. Naruto was only stating the obvious.

He didn’t think Sasuke could have been embarrassed about that, though. There was nothing to be embarrassed about, and if Sasuke thought otherwise, he was the kind of person who would be short-tempered when he was. Or at least Sasuke would more short-tempered than he normally was at any rate. No, it was something more than that.

Naruto admitted he hadn’t figured out all of Sasuke yet, but he knew the one thing that always gave Sasuke away. No matter how cold and standoffish Sasuke tried to be, Sasuke could never hide behind his eyes, and regardless of what Sasuke said, Naruto was able to see a hundred different things Sasuke couldn’t say with words. Those eyes were the most expressive thing about Sasuke. Dark and bleak against Sasuke’s too pale face, they were how Naruto learned to gauge the emotions a lot of people just didn’t want to see. That was why Sasuke wouldn’t look at him, was avoiding him, because he knew Naruto would see whatever Sasuke was trying to hide.

It was also why Naruto felt justified of the fact that he had essentially snuck into his own house and was now casually leaning against the wall outside the doorway of the kitchen to eavesdrop. Somehow, it’d come down to spying on Sasuke and the kid, although he didn’t feel too bad about it. A little guilty maybe, but he couldn’t help it. Not when Sasuke actually let Naruto get away with holding his hand. It was something he wouldn’t normally let Naruto do even when they were by themselves, much less in front of someone like Kakashi, who was more likely to tease Sasuke for it.

And asking Sasuke about it directly wouldn’t get him anywhere; it was the same as Naruto trying to wrestle an answer out of him, which was what he didn’t want to do.

Instead, Naruto was shielding his chakra and hoping Sasuke not saying anything meant he wasn’t aware of what Naruto was doing. He’d admit it was a lot easier to do with the seal on Sasuke’s chakra because it dulled a lot of Sasuke’s abilities, but Naruto still had his doubts about it. 

A restricted chakra supply didn’t stop Sasuke from training, didn’t stop him from pushing himself beyond his limits, nor did it stop him from challenging Naruto every once in a while. It didn’t need to be said that Naruto was holding back, yet each time they fought, Naruto noticed a slight but relatively significant improvement in how Sasuke could keep up with him. Honestly, he suspected the seal was never as effective as it was supposed to be. The seal was slowly being chipped away and it made Naruto wary of what Sasuke was really capable of, but there was no way he was the only one who’d noticed.

With Sasuke’s upcoming mission dealing with the scroll he wasn’t allowed to talk about, Tsunade had to have known in order to send Sasuke in the first place. She had to be confident Sasuke would be able to travel alone and fend for himself, even if the mission was only supposed to last for a week. And since Kakashi liked to visit in order to check on Sasuke, there was a good chance he was aware of it, too.

It was a matter of why anyone hadn’t said anything about it yet. Even Sasuke hadn’t mentioned it to him, but it wasn’t as if Naruto had brought it up, either.

If the seal really was slipping, and Sasuke could sense Naruto no more than three metres away, Naruto could say it was worth the possibility of Sasuke maiming him in the near future when he got a funny feeling in his chest—the one that came right after listening to the kid offering a strawberry to Sasuke.

“Another one?” Sasuke said.

“Two strawberries for Sasuke.”

“What about the apples?”

“One apple for me,” the kid said, taking a few seconds to reflect on the decision. It was probably the most Naruto had heard the kid speak since the time he’d been here, but he spoke pretty clearly for a kid his age—whatever that was. “And one apple for Sasuke.”

“What about the tangerine you have left?”

“One tangerine for...” the kid began, continuing after a slight pause, “I’ll give one tangerine to Naruto.”

Naruto blinked, surprised to hear his name come up in the conversation. He almost wondered if the kid knew he was there.

“And that’s how many altogether?” Sasuke asked.

“…that’s five. Is it five?”

“It’s five,” Sasuke assured the kid.

“Does Naruto like tangerines?”

“Sometimes.”

“Sometimes?”

“He doesn’t eat tangerines all the time.”

“Oh.” For some reason, the kid sounded disappointed. “I know Sasuke likes me, but Sasuke…does Naruto like me, too?”

“I…”

Stretching his arms above his head, Naruto entered the kitchen with a loud yawn. Sasuke jumped slightly, the movement barely noticeable if Naruto didn’t already know what to look for. “I’m back.”

“Naruto,” the kid cried excitedly. “Do you want one?” he asked, holding out a tangerine for Naruto to take.

“Why not?” Naruto took a seat at the small round table. He sat across from Sasuke, placing himself next to the kid, who finally seemed comfortable enough to sit in his own chair instead of in Sasuke’s lap.

“That didn’t take long,” Sasuke said, eyes not quite meeting Naruto’s. He kept his gaze on the wall as he finished the partially eaten strawberry in his hand.

“I was gone an entire thirty minutes. Isn’t half an hour a long time?” Accepting the tangerine from the kid, Naruto grinned. “Thank you.”

Sasuke wiped his hand on a napkin, the red juice on his fingers seeping into it. “Long enough.”

“Naruto.” The kid tugged on Naruto’s shirt. “Does Naruto like apples?”

“Yeah, I eat apples.”

“I eat apples, too,” the kid said shyly. He looked at the small plate of strawberries and sliced apples in front of him, his eyebrows scrunching in thought before he peered up and smiled at Naruto. “But I like strawberries better.”

“Strawberries are better?”

The kid nodded but didn’t hesitate to pick up an apple wedge and place it in his mouth.

A few seconds after the kid began chewing, Naruto said, “So, I was thinking…” He trailed off, turning his gaze on Sasuke. “Do you think we should redecorate the guest room?”

“For what?” Sasuke asked carefully.

“Well, the kid needs a room, right? If we’re going to keep him—”

“He’s not a stray you pick up from the streets.”

“I didn’t say he was, but I meant that we’re going to take care of him from now on.”

“You’re only saying that because he stopped crying around you."

“Yeah, there’s that, too, but I’m serious. I really have been thinking about it.”

Sasuke looked at Naruto from the corner of his eye. “A thirty minute walk changed your mind.”

“Not when you say it like that.”

“Then what are you trying to say?”

“I guess…I know it seemed like I was against it from the beginning, but it’s the same thing I told Iruka-sensei. The kid isn’t old enough to live by himself, and since he’s already so attached to you—not that I want to admit that Tsunade was right or anything, but he really doesn’t have anywhere else to go.”

“I know, Naruto.”

"Even if he doesn’t like me as much, I think we might be all he has," Naruto added quickly, almost as if he was trying to convince himself more than Sasuke. There was a lot of bravado in his words to Iruka earlier, and despite overhearing the kid asking Sasuke about him, he wasn’t that confident in his ability to raise a child.

“Naruto…”

“And I know it’s a lot of responsibility. Having him here will mean a lot of changes, but it’s not like we had the time to prepare for something like this, right? He’s already comfortable here, so that’s why we don’t have a choice. It wouldn’t be right. Because we can’t just dump him off somewhere and hope for the best. Even though it’s going to be a lot of work, we can’t just abandon him. Not if—”

A warm had was placed over his mouth, and then he saw it—saw what Sasuke didn’t want him to see, but Naruto did his best to ignore the uncharacteristically vulnerable look in Sasuke’s eyes.

“…I know.”

...

Sasuke massaged his temples, his fingers drawing circles into his skin and doing nothing to calm his nerves. “Naruto…”

“Are you sure this is a good idea? Isn’t this a little too much too soon?”

Sasuke couldn’t believe Naruto was putting him through this, not when they were already pretty much close to getting it over with anyway. “Was this or was this not your idea?”

“I can’t say this was exactly what I had in mind.”

“It was still your idea.”

“But it’s not like I expected to you to actually go through with it. Or at least make me go through with it.” Naruto frowned, his next words coming off as more of an afterthought. “Not to mention, I don’t think this is a natural course of action for someone like you.”

“If you’re going to do it, just do it.”

“The one time you take me seriously, Sasuke.”

Sasuke sucked his teeth. “Okay, then don’t do it. I’m taking him out and putting him to bed before he gets sick or something. You,” he said, pointing a finger at Naruto, “can stay here.”

“Wait, wait, wait—not yet.”

“Make up your mind.”

“When I ask for something, you won’t move. But when the kid even thinks about saying your name, suddenly you drop everything.” Naruto snapped his fingers. “Like that.”

“Naruto,” Sasuke said slowly, “this isn’t a onetime thing.”

“Obviously. Give me some credit. I know at least that much.”

“Then you’re stalling.”

“Yeah, but you’re the one acting like—“

“How hard is it to give the kid a damn bath?”

“Okay, okay, I get it. Jeeze.” Naruto held his hands up in mock surrender. “We’ve only had the kid for what…three days? Three days, Sasuke.”

“That may be, but…”

Although he may have wanted to, Sasuke didn’t disagree. Three days wasn’t a long time. It still nagged at him how easily he was adjusting to the kid being in their lives, but it’d been more unnerving when Naruto brought it to light in front of Kakashi and Iruka. Until now, he’d been evading Naruto because of it and knew it was the reason behind Naruto’s attempt at eavesdropping earlier. While Naruto did conceal most of his chakra, Sasuke could still tell. There was enough of Naruto’s chakra left that Sasuke could pick up on; however, seeing Naruto’s reflection on the microwave door hadn’t exactly helped Naruto, either.

He wasn’t going to bring it up now, but he still couldn’t figure out what how long the kid had been staying with them had to do with Naruto being afraid of giving the kid a bath, and he let Naruto know as much.

“I’m definitely not scared,” Naruto said. He narrowed his eyes at Sasuke but blinked in surprise when he caught the kid staring at him.

Sasuke watched with a momentary sense of curiosity. More or less, it was like being caught in the middle of a staring contest, but at least they weren’t shrieking at each other like the last time.

Predictably, the kid looked away first. Having quickly lost interest in Naruto, he turned his attention back to the plastic turtle Sakura had given him. Light green with a dark brown shell, it was a wind-up bath toy with flippers that were currently propelling it from one end of the tub to the other, dodging bubbles of varying sizes as the kid helped push it along.

Naruto coughed. “You know I like you, Sasuke. I mean, I really, _really_ like you, but maybe this is too much even for me.” However, despite his words, Naruto was lowering himself beside Sasuke. He placed his knees on the towel serving as a bath mat that was pressed against the space where the floor and tub met.

Sasuke frowned when Naruto looked at him expectantly. “What?”

“Well?”

Sighing, Sasuke reached into the tub, grabbing the washcloth that had sunken near the drain. After squeezing out excess water, he placed it in Naruto’s hand. “Here. Think of it like you’re washing yourself.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes at the horrified look on Naruto’s face but silently agreed it probably wasn’t the best example considering the circumstances.

“Okay, don’t,” Sasuke said. “Get the soap for me,” he told the kid, reaching to grab the washcloth in Naruto’s hand.

Naruto moved the washcloth out of Sasuke’s reach. “What if I get soap in his eyes or something?”

Letting the kid put the soap in his hand, Sasuke held back from saying anything derogatory and tried to speak as gently as possible, which really wasn’t much more than a poorly suppressed growl. “Trust me, you won’t. Just…”

Until recently, it wasn’t as if Sasuke had that much experience with giving a bath to a kid, either, but he thought making sure the kid was clean and didn’t drown in the process was common sense. Whatever the cause for the apprehension, Naruto had to learn eventually. He couldn’t expect Sasuke to give the kid a bath all the time.

“The only way you’re going to mess up is if you don’t do it.” Sasuke put the soap in Naruto’s hand, folding it into the washcloth. “You said we were going to do this together,” he said firmly. “So just…just do it.”

“Sasuke…”

“Naruto, look,” the kid said, pulling the turtle out of the water and raising it high enough so Naruto could see. “It’s a turtle.”

Laughing a little, Naruto leaned forward in interest. “I see. What colour is the turtle?” 

Providing his own sound effects, the kid held the turtle above his head, following an invisible path of arches as he made the toy fly around the tub.

“See?” With his free hand, Naruto pointed his thumb at the kid. “He ignored me.”

“Kids tend to do that when they’re bored with what you have to say.”

“Like that makes me feel better.” Naruto let his shoulders sag. “What do you want me to—?”

With an accompanying boom, the kid slammed the turtle into the water, creating a large splash that carried over to the floor.

“I can’t believe...” Water dripping from his face, Naruto glared at Sasuke. “How come you didn’t get wet?” 

“He didn’t splash water at me,” Sasuke said. “Need a towel?”

“Not really. Most of it got on my shirt. I’ll let it dry, I guess.”

“Sorry, Naruto,” the kid said, although his attention was focused on the turtle he was holding underwater.

“Yeah, yeah.” Naruto wiped his eye with the washcloth, apparently forgetting there was still a bar of soap wrapped inside of it. He dropped them both when he realised he’d unintentionally put soap in his eye and covered his eye with his hand, panicking about how it burned and how he was going to go blind because of the pain.

It started out as a snort, developing into some badly repressed choking sound, and soon became outright laughter that Sasuke could no longer hold in. He knew he shouldn’t be laughing, but it was only funny because Naruto was the one who was worried about getting soap in the kid’s eyes.

“Stop laughing at me, Sasuke.” Naruto titled his head back, rubbing vigorously at his eye with the bottom of his palm. “I really can’t see, and there’s nothing funny about me going blind in one eye.”

But Sasuke wasn’t the only one laughing. The kid was laughing, too. He was probably excited by the noise Naruto was making, but he wasn’t helping by splashing more water at Naruto.

“Hey, you—kid in the tub—yeah, I may be blind, but I can hear you laughing, too. Stop with the water, all right. I’m being serious. Quit it.”

Laughter subsiding, after taking his fill of seeing Naruto squirming, Sasuke cupped Naruto’s face and pried Naruto’s palm away from his eye. “It was funny at first, but now you’re being overdramatic.”

“I’m really going blind in my eye, aren’t I? Don’t do that—you’re going to make it worse if you try to poke my eye out.”

“I’m not trying to poke your eye out. Let me see.” Sasuke pushed Naruto’s head back. He used his finger to put a gentle pressure on the eyelid to prevent Naruto from closing it. The eye itself was pinkish rather than red, and the skin around it somewhat swollen, but it was no more than a minor case of irritation.

Sasuke glanced at the kid. He was leaning over the side of the tub and watching them curiously, the turtle he was playing with forgotten and floating in the water. “Stay there. I’ll help you get out when I’m finished with Naruto.”

The kid nodded. “Un.”

Naruto frowned. “What are you talking about? Aren’t you supposed to be—?”

Without warning, Sasuke blew air into Naruto’s eye. He anticipated Naruto trying to shrink back, but held him still, blowing into Naruto’s eye once more until the eyelid stopped fluttering.

“Is that better?”

...

Eventually Naruto was somehow able to get the kid out of the tub, dressed in clothes that actually fit, and tucked into the bed in the guest room without needing Sasuke there to keep the kid calm. He managed to survive another bathroom fiasco and then some.

His eye was better now, the stinging less distracting, and that funny feeling in his chest he felt earlier was coming back. Even though it was his idea to give the kid a bath this time, it was one of the more daunting moments for Naruto in recent years.

Heart pounding but, at the same time, it was sort of satisfying. And while that may have had something to do with the kid being somewhat traumatised when he looked in the mirror and finally discovered knowing Sasuke wasn’t the only thing he and Naruto had in common, the important thing was the kid had calmed down when Naruto picked him up.

However, any sense of self-satisfaction was short-lived when, after putting the kid to bed, Sasuke had dragged him to the couch to do the one thing he always tried to put off doing.

When he and Sasuke weren’t apart for too long, Naruto on a mission, Sasuke dealing with school, or sparring with each other for the sake of fighting and letting out the kind of frustration even something like sex couldn’t cover, they spent one day out of the week sitting on the couch together, watching TV…and folding clothes.

It was uncomfortably domestic.

Naruto didn’t have that many clothes but made up for it with a habit of waiting until the last minute to wash anything, which left him with more clothes than he wanted to sort through. Usually, he and Sasuke took turns doing laundry, but when Naruto had too many clothes piled in the laundry room, Sasuke refused to wash it with his own clothes if Naruto had even one pair of clean underwear. The only reason Sasuke even washed Naruto’s clothes this time was because the kid was out of clean clothes. The hidden meaning behind that was that they were going to have to go shopping, but Naruto wasn’t going to think about that until tomorrow because he was still trying to figure out how he and Sasuke went from realising the kid had no clothes to trying to decide what to call the kid besides…kid.

Since the kid was going to stay, the conversation about names was inevitable, which made it seem even more overwhelming than it did when the kid first started living with them. It wasn’t like they had nine months to put thought into something. Coming up with a name for a kid who already had a personality of his own wasn’t something Naruto was looking forward to. It was hard to get around the fact that both he and Sasuke were stubborn, yet they had to come to some kind of decision if they were going to be more than two guys and a kid.

“Really, though, I don’t know what else to call him,” Naruto said. “Besides kid and—”

Sasuke threw a shirt in Naruto’s face. “Don’t.”

“Why not?” Naruto asked, leaning to whisper in Sasuke’s ear. “I think Gaki-chan fits, don’t you?” Gently, he bit the lobe of Sasuke’s ear and smiled when he was shoved away to the other side of the couch.

“Just because Tsunade calls you brat, doesn’t mean I’m letting you call him that. Adding chan to the end of it doesn’t make it cute.”

“I thought it did,” Naruto said. “Besides, we only need something until he tells us his real name.”

“And if he doesn’t have one?”

“Aka-chan,” Naruto suggested. He was only saying it to tease Sasuke, though, who was a lot easier to tease now than he was when they were younger. He saw it as taking advantage of all the missed opportunities to get under Sasuke’s skin like Sasuke had been able to do to Naruto inadvertently so many times before.

“He’s not a baby.”

“Close enough.”

“It’s nowhere near close.”

“Okay, real names then,” Naruto agreed. “How about Souji?”

“Souji?”

“That’s what I said.”

“Does he look like a Souji to you?”

“What about Toshizou?”

“Does your mind even process what comes out of your mouth?”

“Fine. You don’t like Toshizou. What about Isami, then? Is that good enough?”

“Where the hell are you getting these from?”

“I don’t see you coming up with anything,” Naruto said. Old habits weren’t so easy to put away, and sometimes it didn’t take that much to get into an argument with Sasuke. It may have started off as teasing, simply listing names to get a rise out of Sasuke, but whether Naruto was being serious or not, what was the point when Sasuke was going to put down every name he suggested? 

Sasuke looked at Naruto sharply. “That’s because I’m still thinking and not spitting out the first thing that comes to my mind.”

“Then pick something since we both know we can’t keep calling him kid or brat, or—”

“I am not naming our...” Sasuke stilled, pausing in the middle of folding one of Naruto’s shirts, and Naruto looked at him in surprise. “I mean, I...”

“Our what, Sasuke?”

“Forget it.”

“No. No, I’m not going to forget it because you really want this, right?”

Sasuke reached for another shirt to fold, this time one of his own, but otherwise didn’t speak.

The sounds from TV filled the silence between them, a voice of some woman on a commercial Naruto couldn’t have cared less about. “Tell me if this is what you want because you can’t keep something like this to yourself. You know I can’t stand it when you do that.

“Damn it, Sasuke. I’m talking to you, so look at me, okay?” Balling his fists, Naruto pressed his hands into his thighs. “ _Please_.”

Sasuke continued to fold the shirt, turning to face Naruto when he was finished. “I already told you to forget it.”

“Too bad for you I’m not going to forget it.”

“Well good for you then because it’s not that serious after all, is it?”

Naruto was stunned by the words. “What is this about, the names? You know I was just joking.”

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. “Were you?”

“Sasuke, you can’t think I was being serious. We already agreed that we’re taking the kid in. No looking back, right? I meant it when I said it, and I wasn’t trying to make you think I was going back on that.”

Naruto uncurled his fists, letting his hands fall to the side. “It’s not that I’m not taking this seriously. It’s just that I need you to bear with me. I’m still nervous about everything, all right.” He was scared, too, but he wasn’t going to say it out loud if Sasuke hadn’t already figured it out by now. “I’m not like you—I can’t just...”

“Can’t what?”

With a forced smile, Naruto laughed weakly. “You’re trying to make me say it, aren’t you?”

“I’m not trying to make you say anything.”

Smile fading, Naruto took a deep breath and released it with a loud exhale. “It’s just, I have these moments where everything feels okay—sometimes, it almost feels right to do this. But then sometimes I don’t know what to do because some part of me thinks it’s not supposed to be this easy and something’s going to go wrong.

“I know I’m going to, but I don’t want to mess up,” he admitted softly. “And I don’t want you to look down on me when it happens.”

Sighing, Sasuke ran a hand through his hair. “Naruto…look, I’m not expecting you to be perfect. I think we’re well beyond that stage.”

“Rub it in, why don’t you.”

“Anyway, didn’t Sakura, of all people, say I wasn’t perfect?”

“That’s because she never got the chance to really get to know you.”

Sasuke hesitated before speaking. “We both know I’m not perfect.”

“Once upon a time, it seemed like you were. Not so much now maybe, but when it comes to kids…”

“I actually thought—you really can’t see it, can you?”

“If I could, do you think I’d be waiting for you to tell me?”

“You know, I may have changed, but you’re still as slow as you used to be.”

“Are you still trying to kick me while I’m down?”

Sasuke snorted. “The kid already likes you, Naruto.”

“...oh,” Naruto said. “ _Oh_. You think so?”

Something dangerously close to a smile on his face, Sasuke motioned his head toward something behind Naruto. “Guess who woke up.”

Turning around, Naruto saw it was the kid, for once looking to Naruto before Sasuke. He was hanging off the arm of the couch, feet dangling just above the floor as he pulled himself over the couch and onto Naruto’s lap.

...

Four days ago, shopping would have been the last thing on Sasuke’s mind. He didn’t like it. Naruto shared the sentiment. They both acknowledged it was part of the process that came along with taking responsibility for the kid, but neither of them held any particular inclination to take that step.

Doing laundry asserted the kid not only needed clothes but something more along the lines of a wardrobe. Including the clothes the kid was wearing when he arrived on the doorstep, three days worth of shorts, a week’s worth of shirts, even less underwear than Naruto had, and a pair of sandals didn’t count. The extra white toothbrush that used to be in the cabinet under the sink didn’t count, either. Now it sat in the toothbrush holder on top of the sink, in between Naruto’s yellow one and Sasuke’s blue one, and was among the continually growing list of necessities Naruto and Sasuke had compiled the day before.

It was by sheer luck the clothes Sakura had given them managed to fit. Unfortunately, they were also tailor made. As well, the clothes the kid was originally wearing had no tags or anything that indicated size. It left Naruto and Sasuke with no choice other than taking the kid from store to store. The three of them would probably raise more questions than Sasuke admittedly would care for. However, their only option of finding the kid’s size was through trial and error, having the kid try on clothes, and spending time indulging in the kind of activity both he and Naruto tried fervently to avoid.

Sasuke simply had an aversion of crowds and didn’t have the patience to deal with too many people at one time. Naruto found the idea of being seen in public shopping for a kid too embarrassing. His argument, which was little more than a feeble attempt to deny the inevitable, was that they were supposed to keep the situation about the kid as much of a secret as possible until things were further situated.

Going shopping meant bringing the kid along and therefore meant not only disclosing the kid but possibly Sasuke and Naruto’s relationship, as well. Naruto’s plea was a desperate effort not to go, compelling if Sasuke actually cared about what people thought of him and if they hadn’t already made a commitment to raise the kid. But while he did understand why Naruto had given up what little self-respect he had left and was practically close to being on his knees and pleading not to go shopping, Sasuke absolutely refused to suffer alone, and eventually managed to persuade Naruto to go with the promise of getting the kid to sleep in the guest room tonight.

The initial plan was to leave early in the morning when stores first opened in order to avoid most of the casual shoppers; it would be easier not to draw too much attention with less people. But the kid, being a kid and therefore being even more unpredictable than Naruto, chose this particular morning not to listen.

The day began with failed attempts by both Sasuke and Naruto to wake the kid, followed by the kid’s nonstop crying when they wouldn’t let him go back to sleep. Trying to get the kid dressed and making breakfast, somewhere in between was the smell of burnt eggs and eye watering smoke from the oven mitt that caught on fire because Naruto left it on the stove. And while Naruto tried to apologize and assure Sasuke the important thing was that he didn’t burn down the house, Sasuke struggled not to give into the urge to strangle Naruto for being so careless and putting the kid in hysterics when the smoke detector went off.

Fortunately, there was no damage done and the house was still intact when they finally did manage to leave. Unfortunately, it also seemed the majority of the village picked this day to be out, and after spending two hours roaming through stores and weaving in and out of throngs of people, Sasuke found himself more than ready to go back home.

It was midday, when the sun was at its peak, and far too hot for Naruto to be walking so close to him.

“People are still staring at us,” Naruto whispered, bumping his shoulder into Sasuke’s.

“Your point being?”

Naruto snorted. “That we’ve been going up and down the same place for the last twenty minutes and people are still staring at us.”

“And obviously you’re not helping the situation,” Sasuke hissed back, rubbing the palm of the small and sweaty hand holding onto his fingers.

“Well,” Naruto said anxiously, “is it us or the kid?”

“I don’t know. Both—probably you,” Sasuke answered, trying to ignore the way Naruto’s arm kept sliding against his. For someone who seemed so concerned earlier about people discovering their relationship, Sasuke didn’t think Naruto could get any closer to him than he already was. 

It was bad enough he and Naruto were being seen together, and holding hands with a kid who looked uncannily like Naruto at first glance was even worse. Though, it wasn’t being seen with Naruto and the kid that Sasuke minded. People in this village tended to be annoyingly presumptuous when it came to him, even Naruto to a lesser extent, but Sasuke knew he sometimes brought out the worst in people. Coupled with the stares, the pointing fingers, and the incessant whispering that was really too loud to be called whispering, today was an experience Sasuke could have done without; however, he was more worried about what kind of effect it would have on the kid.

“It’s not like anybody can see he has my hair, right? Because that’d be kind of hard to miss,” Naruto said, leaning closer to murmur into Sasuke’s ear. He had no sense of tact whatsoever. “You should have let me dye it black or something.”

“We are not going though this. Again.” Sasuke nudged Naruto away, trying to put some distance between them. The kid had already made himself an extension of Sasuke’s right side. He didn’t need Naruto attached to his left. “It doesn’t matter. People can’t tell, anyway.”

“I guess…” Naruto said, although he didn’t sound that convinced. “Or do you think it’s because the hat’s too cute?”

Sasuke opened his mouth, ready to denounce such an inane idea, but then found himself actually beginning to consider it. That the black and white character hat with the ears on top that barely concealed the kid’s blond hair had something to do with the attention they were receiving. Sasuke wouldn’t go as far as calling the hat cute, but it was certainly distracting enough that other people may have thought of it as cute. Cute in a way that endorsed sickeningly sweet cooing noises and indiscernible sounds from adults who temporarily regressed mentally at the sight—maybe it was just enough to draw attention from how much the three of them gave the impression of being a family.

While Sasuke continued to dwell on the possibility, Naruto said slowly, “You know I wasn’t being serious.” He was staring at Sasuke with both eyebrows raised, as if he could somehow tell Sasuke was actually mulling over the cuteness of the hat and the consequences because of it. “…right?”

Lips pursed, Sasuke pointedly ignored the question. He didn’t want to admit Naruto hadn’t been too far from the truth. “The two of us are shopping. I’m holding hands with a kid, and you’re practically breathing down the back of my neck. Why do you think people are staring at us?”

“Hmm...” Naruto looked at Sasuke thoughtfully, closing the small gap between Sasuke and himself once more. Knowing Naruto, despite hearing what Sasuke said, he was probably doing it on purpose. “Good point.”

“It’s not as if you can do anything about it.” Sasuke nudged Naruto away for seemingly tenth time today. “Even if they are looking, just ignore them. They’ll stop eventually.”

“Yeah, but—”

“Naruto,” the kid interrupted, stopping Naruto and Sasuke in the middle of the street. Clutching a small bottle of water to his chest, he let go of Sasuke’s hand and tugged on Naruto’s shirt. “Can we go home now?”

Eyebrows raised, Naruto looked at Sasuke but didn’t say anything. Unlike Sasuke, he hadn’t heard the kid refer to their house as home, and Sasuke realised it had taken Naruto by surprise. “You’re ready to go...home?”

“Un.” The kid nodded. “I’m tired.”

"We’re leaving now. Let’s just…" Naruto began. His voice trailed off, and he broke into a grin when something behind Sasuke caught his eye. “Hold these for me, would you?” He handed Sasuke the three large bags he was carrying, letting go before Sasuke had a chance to give them back. 

Already holding two bags of his own in one hand, Sasuke grunted at the additional weight. “What do you mean hold these? What am I holding these for?”

“I want to get something before we go.” Naruto’s hand brushed across Sasuke’s, giving it a light squeeze before Naruto kneeled down and placed his hand on the kid’s shoulder. “I’ll be back. Just wait for me, okay?”

The kid looked doubtful and hesitated to answer. “…okay.”

“Naruto, where are you going?” Sasuke asked, frowning when Naruto stood.

“It’s a surprise,” Naruto called out, already running in the opposite direction.

Sasuke sighed when he turned around and saw Naruto heading in the direction of a yakitori stand. He didn’t see the purpose in Naruto running off like that; why couldn’t Naruto just say he was going to buy food?

“Come on.” Resigned, Sasuke held out his other hand and waited for the kid to take it. When the small hand took hold of his fingers, he led the kid across the street and headed toward a bench in front of a bookstore that was in the process of being renovated. He couldn’t exactly go chasing after Naruto, not while trying to balance five bags. He had a kid to look after. 

When they took a seat on the bench, the kid peered at Sasuke with questioning eyes. “Sasuke, is Naruto…?”

“He’s coming back.”

“Oh.” The kid took a sip from his water bottle and wiped his mouth. After placing the bottle into his lap, he leaned into Sasuke’s side. "Then we can go home?”

“Sure.” Sasuke let himself fall against the bench. The surface was hard and the bench itself pressed awkwardly into his back, but it was still hot and the two hours they’d been here had been prolonged long enough that Sasuke didn’t care.

Despite his initial reluctance from this morning, the kid was the one dragging Sasuke and Naruto through the crowded streets. The kid took them from store to store excitedly, as if it was his first time being out like this, which Sasuke surmised it probably was.

They ended up grabbing the first thing that caught the kid’s eye, basic necessities like pants, shirts, socks—all questionable in colour, though Naruto and the kid obviously thought otherwise when the kid tried on that inexcusably bright green and orange jacket in front of the mirror—and two pairs of shoes that were refreshingly non-descript in comparison. They bought toothbrushes, too, smaller ones the kid could actually hold in his hand; alongside more toothpaste since the kid didn’t like the taste of what they already had; bubble bath that smelled like apples the kid almost ran out of the store with; blue soap in the shape of flowers because it was on sale and they needed soap no matter how much Naruto tried to argue using it would be a slight to his masculinity; among other things Sasuke lost count of but he was sure five large bags were beyond the scope of what was on the list.

Their budget was already tight. Sasuke didn’t have his family name to depend on, those assets seized not long after he left the village, and the money he had saved over the years wasn’t money to spend carelessly. Working at the Academy paid roughly enough to get by, and while Naruto made more than him, it wasn’t by much. Between the two of them, it was enough to live comfortably, but with the kid in the picture, they’d probably have to cut back on a few things.

Starting after today.

When the basic necessities were taken care of, they spent the rest of time sightseeing. The kid was still wary of people he didn’t know, namely anyone who wasn’t Sasuke or Naruto, but managed to put his normal apprehension aside in favour of poking around an old toy store, where the kid developed an attachment to a stuffed turtle he wouldn’t let go of that Naruto caved in and bought for him even though the kid gave it to Sasuke to hold as soon as the turtle was paid for; and staring in awe at the lavish cakes in a bakery, where the kid received a free sample of the cake he wanted to try but ended up spitting out into a napkin and—

“Hey, Uchiha Sasuke!”

The kid shifted into Sasuke’s side at the voice, and Sasuke groaned when he turned and saw Kiba coming towards them. Although, for once, Akamaru wasn’t in sight, and Sasuke was glad he didn’t have to deal with the possibility of the kid’s less than enthusiastic response to Kiba’s dog.

He and Kiba weren’t necessarily on good terms. However, they weren’t necessarily on bad terms, either, and it made trying to avoid Kiba that much more difficult. Kiba was crude most of the time, painfully frank to the point of being insensitive the rest of the time, and while he had in fact moved beyond the stage of denial to acknowledge, if not accept, Naruto and Sasuke’s relationship, Sasuke really wasn’t in the mood to deal with trying to explain the kid currently resolved to find some way to burrow into his side.

Rubbing his forehead, Sasuke said, “What do you want?”

“I was—whoa, what’s with the kid?”

“Is it any of your business?”

“Well, you know,” Kiba began, crossing his arms, “if you’re running a baby-sitting service or something like that…”

Sasuke didn’t bother to respond. It was an attempt to provoke him that hadn’t worked the first time, and the only reason Kiba continued to try was because he personally found it hilarious that Sasuke worked under Iruka with the younger kids enrolled in the Academy.

“I can’t believe you’re so touchy.” Kiba smirked, a look that wasn’t becoming on him. “Really, you’d think after all these years you’d eased up by now.” 

“Why are you still here?”

“Actually, I came looking for Naruto.” Kiba blinked and uncrossed his arms. “Wasn’t he here just a minute ago?”

A reply on the tip of his tongue, Sasuke paused when he felt more movement at his side and looked down to see the kid was pulling at his shirt. He frowned. Sasuke knew the kid was only sociable when he wanted to be, but he didn’t have any problems being around so many people earlier. He wasn’t sure what it was about Kiba that was making the kid uncomfortable.

“Sasuke, I don’t want…” The kid frowned, unintentionally mirroring the expression on Sasuke’s face as he buried his head in Sasuke’s shoulder, which made the hat fall off his head and into Sasuke’s lap. Naturally, it didn’t take long for Kiba to react.

“What the…” Kiba stammered. He jumped back and raised a finger at the kid, his mouth opening and closing in an exaggerated fashion.

Quickly, Sasuke put the hat back on the kid and tried to cover the few traces of blond hair sticking out. It may have been pointless considering Kiba had seen the kid’s hair, but Sasuke had no intention of causing an even bigger scene. A few people had already stopped to stare. Thankfully, it didn’t appear as if they’d seen why Kiba had recoiled.

“Before you—”

“Look, I know it’s already pretty intense between you guys, but seriously, man—what the hell?”

Sasuke sneered. For a moment, he’d forgotten exactly how tactless Kiba could be. The kid didn’t need to be subjected to that kind of reaction, and Sasuke didn’t want to draw more attention than Kiba was apparently trying to. “Are you really—?”

“Naruto,” the kid cried, letting go of Sasuke as Sasuke and Kiba turned to see Naruto walking toward them.

Naruto was carrying three skewers in one hand, each with pieces of grilled chicken stacked close together and wrapped in parchment paper. His eyes narrowed slightly. “Kiba…”

Kiba lowered his finger slowly. Eyes wide, his gaze went from the kid to Naruto, back to the kid, and finally settled on Naruto.

“Kiba…” Naruto took a tentative step forward, standing beside Kiba. “It’s not what you think, all right,” he said tightly. “Just let me explain.”

When Kiba didn’t respond, Naruto poked him in the shoulder with his free hand. “Um...Kiba?”

“I…I—I guess I came looking for you at a bad time.”

“I know it’s a lot to take in right now, but—”

“Shut up, Naruto. I’m trying really, _really_ hard not to freak out right now, okay?”

“…okay,” Naruto said oddly. Pushing the shopping bags aside, he took a seat on the bench, the kid sitting in between him and Sasuke.

“Naruto?” the kid said, looking at the food Naruto was holding. He extended his hand to Naruto. “I want one.”

“Smells good, right? I figured since you don’t like sweet things, you’d like this.” Naruto gave the kid a bright smile, able to ignore the fact that Kiba seemed to be the only one who felt out of place. “It’s yakitori.”

“Yakitori,” the kid repeated, removing the paper wrapped around the chicken. “Is it good?”

“Meat on a stick is always good. But it’s hot, too, so blow on it first,” Naruto said, handing Sasuke one of the skewers while he made sure the kid blew on the meat before he took a bite.

Accepting the food, Sasuke made a noncommittal noise in thanks. He began to eat the chicken nonchalantly, which, judging by the look on Kiba’s face, was just as alarming as Naruto offering yakitori to the kid as if it were an everyday occurrence.

“Did you get napkins?” Sasuke asked.

Naruto nodded, digging into his pocket to pull out napkins to give to Sasuke. “Here.”

“Um…” Clearly not at ease, Kiba licked his lips, and Sasuke had to commend him for being able to keep his composure so far. “He looks like…”

“Yeah, about that…it’s complicated.” Naruto laughed nervously. “I mean, you should have been there when I first saw him.”

Kiba turned from Naruto to Sasuke. Sitting down with Kiba standing over them, Sasuke didn’t appreciate the vantage point but was enjoying the turn of events, taunting Kiba with the apparent normality of the situation.

“Is this really what I think it is?” Kiba asked Sasuke.

“Depending on what you think this is,” was the bland answer.

Taking a bite out of his chicken, Naruto snorted. “You’re not helping, Sasuke.”

Kiba looked mortified, just short of having a nervous breakdown. Then, to Sasuke’s amusement, Kiba closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and murmured something incoherent. Exhaling, he opened his eyes and faced Naruto again. “Oh…okay…so, u...uh, what’s his name?”

Before either Sasuke or Naruto had a chance to admit they didn’t know, the kid said something muffled by the mouthful of chicken he was chewing, words jumbled among the bits of meat falling onto his shirt.

After swallowing the food in his mouth, the kid tried again. “Hotaru,” he said, pronouncing it so easily, so assertively, that it couldn’t have been something fabricated on the spot. The kid had to have known and simply chosen not to say anything despite Sasuke and Naruto asking repeatedly.

Stunned, Naruto shared a glance with Sasuke before turning his attention back to the kid. “You knew your name all this time?”

Truthfully, “all this time” only translated into four days, but Sasuke and Naruto had already fallen into the assumption that the kid didn’t have a name. It was only fair considering the kid would talk about anything and everything that didn’t pertain to his name, his age, or where he came from. But Sasuke wasn’t bothered by the fact the kid had purposely elected not to disclose that particular piece of information. No, it was the fact the kid could suddenly say it to Kiba that Sasuke found offensive.

He found it even more so when Kiba leaned closer to the kid—to…Hotaru—the shock from earlier traded for confusion as Kiba tilted his head and asked, “Isn’t Hotaru a girl’s name?”

...

So maybe the bright orange shirt did clash with Hotaru’s hair, like Sasuke said. And maybe the even brighter red shorts weren’t exactly helping, just like Sasuke said. But Hotaru was the one who picked out the clothes in the store, dressed himself when they got home, and Naruto thought Sasuke was making a big deal out of nothing…even if Naruto was the one to kind of persuade Hotaru towards those colours, which, despite what Sasuke also said, did not make Naruto colour-blind.

Of course, all Naruto had to do was bring up the disaster that was Sasuke trying to dress Hotaru in Naruto’s old clothes, which was enough to shut Sasuke up.

Still, the red and orange really weren’t so bad at night. Kind of fitting really, the way it made Hotaru stand out against the sky.

It was only a little after six o’clock, but it was getting darker earlier now, tomorrow longer and colder than yesterday as fall continued to gradually fade into winter, although it was still warm enough to lounge under the stars before it got too dark. There was this nice feeling that came with the three of them together, spread out on a blanket stretched over the grass and watching the fireflies that Naruto could only remember seeing when he was a kid. It was a feeling he could sink into, one of those moments that made the world around him go slowly until it eventually seemed to stop altogether.

Romantic, he wanted to say, did say, but only got a strange look in response from Sasuke, who rolled over on the blanket to face Naruto with a raised eyebrow.

“You really don’t have any sense of wonder, do you?” Naruto said.

Covering a yawn, Sasuke closed his eyes and then folded his arms beneath his head.

“If you’re that tired, go to sleep.”

Sasuke peered at Naruto with one eye. “Aren’t you the one that dragged me out here?”

“Well, it’s not like you had to come.”

Sasuke scoffed, and yeah, maybe Naruto forgot about how he and Hotaru had taken Sasuke outside against his will not too long ago, Hotaru pulling on Sasuke’s arm and Naruto none too gently prodding Sasuke’s back. In Naruto’s defence, however, Hotaru was the one who wanted to get a closer look at the fireflies he’d never seen before. During dinner, Hotaru had caught a glimpse of them through the kitchen window, fireflies gathering in the clearing between the side of their house and the edge of the forest that continued beyond the borders of Konoha and into the country’s neutral territory—except it seemed that Hotaru didn’t want to go near the fireflies now that he was out here.

“Still won’t change your mind, huh?” Naruto ruffled Hotaru’s hair, the corner of his mouth lifting when Hotaru tried to push his hand away. “You can’t really see the fireflies from all the way back here, you know.”

“…I know,” Hotaru said.

“What if I hold your hand? Would you want to see them up close, then?”

Hotaru shook his head, tightly clutching the blanket with his fist as he scooted closer to Sasuke. Any further and he probably would have been sitting on top of Sasuke.

“They’re not scary,” Naruto said softly. “I promise.”

“But what if they bite me?”

Naruto pretended to think for a moment. “Well, I’m pretty sure fireflies don’t bite, but even if they did, someone’s going to have to protect Sasuke, right?”

Sasuke opened his eyes and sent Naruto a look that was far from agreeable. “The fireflies won’t hurt you, Hotaru.”

Trying not to laugh at Sasuke’s expression, Naruto winked at Hotaru. “Don’t worry. Sasuke’s just trying to pretend he’s not scared,” he said loudly. There was no point in whispering when Sasuke would hear anyway, and he knew Sasuke wouldn’t deny it if it helped Hotaru get over his fear. Other than muttering something Naruto couldn’t hear, probably about inflicting bodily harm on Naruto in some shape or form, Sasuke was an empty threat for the time being.

Letting go of the blanket, Hotaru put what was supposed to be a comforting hand on Sasuke’s shoulder, and Naruto knew if it had been anyone else, Sasuke would have reacted violently. “Then I have to protect Sasuke,” he said with a firm nod, his voice steadier.

“Good.” Naruto uncrossed his legs and stood, holding out his hand for Hotaru to take. “Because I don’t think I can do it on my own.”

Hesitantly, Hotaru removed his hand from Sasuke’s shoulder and took Naruto’s hand. He began to stand, peering at Naruto with a shaky smile but with large eyes so full of trust, and when their fingers touched, it just about caused all the butterflies in Naruto’s stomach to burst.

That was when it hit him, when Naruto realised how hard he’d fallen for Hotaru and accepted there wasn’t a chance of him being able to turn back.

He and Sasuke may have made the conscious decision yesterday, but there was something about calling the kid something other than… _kid_ that made the whole situation seem more permanent, as if this was now something that couldn’t be taken away from them, that Hotaru was someone that couldn’t be taken away from them. Maybe because it was still so new, this ache in his chest that made him kind of giddy and why Naruto felt like he was caught in a moment he didn’t want to end—and then there was this almost desperate need to keep saying Hotaru’s name, to say it over and over again until he could trust himself not to forget it the next day.

But if they hadn’t run into Kiba, Naruto wasn’t sure if he and Sasuke would have ever learned Hotaru’s name, if they would have ended up naming him something else entirely that didn’t fit nearly as well as Hotaru did.

And despite what Kiba had thought at the time, Hotaru wasn’t a girl’s name. It was more uncommon for a guy, sure, but that didn’t mean it was restricted to one sex, which Hotaru had been quick to let Kiba know by kicking him in the shin.

Naruto understood Hotaru being upset about Kiba pretty much implying that Hotaru was a girl. It _was_ upsetting, and Kiba shouldn’t have been so direct in his thoughts anyway. Naruto would have felt the same in Hotaru’s shoes and would have done something in retaliation, too. He wasn’t quite sure what that would be, but the kicking thing Naruto blamed entirely on Sasuke. When Kiba had howled in pain, Naruto could only wince in sympathy. He still had phantom pains on his arms and legs from when Sasuke let him know just how much he didn’t appreciate Naruto calling Hotaru a brat, and seeing that Hotaru had usually been present when it did happen, it only made sense that Sasuke was setting a bad example.

Unsurprisingly, Sasuke didn’t agree when Naruto had told him. Ignoring Kiba’s moans of pain in the background, Sasuke didn’t see any need to apologise to Kiba, claiming Kiba shouldn’t have been inconsiderate, and any hope of getting an apology out of Hotaru, who had found a safe haven sitting close to Sasuke, was useless. Seeing that neither Sasuke nor Hotaru would budge, Naruto had no choice but to beg forgiveness for something he hadn’t even done because he was associated with the kinds of people who refused to take responsibility for their actions. It was an apology Kiba didn’t accept, and Naruto was only partially assured their friendship was still intact when Kiba hobbled away on one foot with what was left of his dignity.

But other than that slight misfortune, Kiba had taken the subject of Hotaru pretty well. Because he didn’t know about Hotaru beforehand, Naruto could assume his earlier reservations about Sakura mentioning Hotaru were misplaced. Naruto couldn’t be so sure what Kiba would do about the information, although he supposed it didn’t really matter considering Hotaru wasn’t just a not so well-guarded secret between him and Sasuke anymore.

They were like a family almost or maybe even more than that since it wasn’t blood that tied them together. Lopsided in some ways, too, since they weren’t traditional in any sense of the word, but if it was enough for strangers to see the three of them as one, Naruto wasn’t going to disagree.

“Look, Naruto,” Hotaru said softly, letting go of Naruto’s hand as they came closer to the fireflies. His mouth was open in awe, eyes full of wonder as he watched the fireflies light up the sky. “…they’re dancing.”

“What’d I tell you?” Naruto smiled and reached to cup a firefly in his hands. “They’re not scary at all.”

Hotaru looked at him in excitement, and Naruto kneeled down to let Hotaru peek at the firefly through his fingers. “They don’t hurt?”

“Nope.” Naruto opened his palms and released the firefly. “Not at all.”

“You let it go. Naruto, why…?”

Naruto laughed. “You can’t keep them, you know.”

“Why not?”

“Because if you keep them, that means they can’t go home.”

“Oh.” Hotaru turned away, a longing in his eyes as his gaze wandered in the direction where Sasuke was. Naruto narrowed his eyes in concern, but before he had a chance to say anything, Hotaru looked at him with an ear-splitting grin. “Will Naruto teach me how to catch a firefly? I’ll let it go home again.”

Naruto was caught off guard by the quick change in mood but decided it was better not to bring it back up. He couldn’t when Hotaru had that kind of pensive expression on his face. It wasn’t something Naruto wanted to see again. “Okay,” he began, “first, you have to pick out the one you want to catch. Do you see one?”

“Un…I found one.”

“The next thing,” Naruto continued, slowly moving to stand behind Hotaru, “and this is where you really have to concentrate, is to not take your eyes off it. All fireflies are bright, but you have to make sure yours is the brightest firefly you see, okay?”

Hotaru nodded his head absently.

“Because if you blink, you’ll miss it.”

“Okay.”

“Then, when you want to catch it, you lift up your arms.”

“Like this?” Hotaru asked, raising his hands in the air.

“Just like that,” Naruto said, extending his arms toward Hotaru. “Open your hands…”

“Uh-huh.”

“And when you’re ready…” Naruto paused and quickly said, “You bring your hands together and hold on to the firefly as tight as you can.” He wrapped his arms around Hotaru’s waist, spinning the two of them around as he lifted Hotaru into the air.

“Naru…Na…” Squirming, Hotaru dissolved into a fit of gurgles and high pitched squeals. “Naruto, I’m not a firefly.”

Naruto grinned. “Caught you, anyway, didn’t I?”

Hotaru laughed again, pressing his cheek against Naruto’s. “Naruto is silly.”

“I may be silly, but you know what?” Naruto whispered.

“What?” Hotaru whispered back.

“I don’t think I can let you go.”

Hotaru grabbed the back of Naruto’s shirt, holding on to it tightly. “I’m already home, Naruto.”

...

“Is this a bad time, Sasuke?”

“It’s always a bad time when you come like this.”

“I thought that since you appeared to be more… _content_ , lately—”

“And what does my behaviour have to do with you being here?”

“Nothing you would care to know. You just seem to be adjusting rather well given the circumstances.”

“So, you’re a voyeur now?” Sasuke said, letting the water out of the sink. His eyes travelled to the figure standing outside of the kitchen, partially shadowed by the lack of light in the hall.

“Occasionally,” was the calm response. “I can be a casual observer, too.”

“The kind of casual observer who lets himself in without a key?”

“You left the door open.” 

Sasuke snorted. “Try another one.”

“Or I let myself in,” the figure said, walking into the kitchen. With a slight nod, he passed Sasuke and headed towards the small round table positioned beneath a large window. “Whichever one you prefer.”

“I’d prefer it if you left me alone and stopped taking it upon yourself to invade my personal space whenever you felt like it.”

“I’m afraid that wasn’t quite what I had in mind.”

Sasuke dried his hands on a dish towel and draped it over the sink. “What are you doing here, Kakashi?”

It wasn’t the first time Kakashi invited himself in and wouldn’t be the last. Since Sasuke had come back, Kakashi, while not officially signed to do so, felt an unwarranted compulsion to keep an eye on him. Whether the habit was some sort of lingering guilt or the result of Kakashi minding him as he had done in the past, Sasuke didn’t know. It was an irritating habit all the same, an invasion of the privacy he thought he’d finally earned, and under no circumstances did Sasuke want Kakashi to feel compelled to treat him as a responsibility.

Perhaps, it was more frustrating that Naruto knew about it, too, that Naruto made himself scarce whenever Kakashi was around in order to push Sasuke to speak to someone other than Naruto on a weekly basis. Naruto didn’t believe him when Sasuke said his encounters with Kakashi weren’t ones that he enjoyed.

Kakashi pulled a chair from under the table, turning it around before sitting down. He crossed his arms and placed them on the back of the chair. “Have a seat.”

“I’d rather stand.”

“Fair enough.” Kakashi shrugged. “So…his name is Hotaru, is it?” he began conversationally, and Sasuke refrained from asking how Kakashi knew about Hotaru’s name. “I suppose it’s a good thing that means he’s no longer simply ‘kid’. Maybe even something more by now?”

“You’re really trying my patience—especially when I’m telling you something you’re already fully aware of doing.”

“Can you fault me for being curious about the child I regard as my nephew?”

“Yes,” Sasuke said shortly, unable to tell if Kakashi was being serious or not. “And that offer was never extended to you.”

“Ah, so it wasn’t.” Kakashi took Sasuke’s comment in stride, deliberately digressing into the more mundane exchange they went through every time Kakashi decided to drop in unannounced. “Aren’t you going to offer me tea?”

“You don’t like the tea I have.” Sighing, Sasuke leaned against the counter. “Why’d you come by this time?” he asked, not expecting a straight answer and surprised when he received one more forward than usual.

Kakashi rested his head against his palm, his gaze inscrutable. “To remind you that your mission is in two days.”

Sasuke looked at Kakashi sceptically. However flippant he may have appeared to others, Kakashi was decidedly an objective man and someone who was rarely without an ulterior motive. It wasn’t something Sasuke could easily forget. “Is that all?”

“Among other things possibly, though, in truth, I’m wondering how the scroll is coming along. More specifically, I suppose you can say I’m wondering if you’ve had an opportunity to make sense of it or not.”

“That was voluntarily and not part of the mission I was assigned—or so you told me.”

“Then, I can safely assume that you’ve finished translating it?” Kakashi asked lightly, although, to Sasuke it was more of a statement than a question.

As of yesterday, Sasuke had finished translating the scroll. It didn’t take long, no more than two of the six days he was allotted to do so. Yet it was strange to see that Kakashi was so intrigued with something that turned out to be no more than an abstract piece of fiction, written in an obscure dialect Sasuke vaguely remembered seeing when he was younger fromthe title of a book sitting on top of the shelf he never had the opportunity to reach in his father’s study.

He didn’t remember enough to interpret the scroll from memory alone and had found time between taking care of Hotaru and dealing with Naruto to visit the old library in the Uchiha compound. Due to lack of attention, it was poorly maintained, overgrown with weeds and infested with insects, but Sasuke had found a few pieces of source material that made translating easier.

The scroll, Sasuke had soon realised, was no more than an unfinished fable disguised as a hastily scribbled children’s tale. With no obvious significance, it chronicled the story of a boy abandoned by his family and his attempts to find his way back by capturing a firefly in a jar each night in the belief that it would eventually lead him home. The narrative suggested the story followed the boy through the course of one week; however, the last three days were missing. It ended on fourth day with the boy falling asleep and didn’t continue further.

Initially, after translating the scroll, Sasuke had become conflicted, wondering if delivering a children’s story to an important village such as Kusagakure, with whom Konoha was trying to reaffirm its political ties, was simply another excuse to mock him. He thought it was another way of reinforcing the notion that he wouldn’t become anything more than an expendable messenger for Konoha, but then Hotaru had come into the picture. Hotaru had appeared the day Kakashi gave him the scroll, and Sasuke was beginning to have his misgivings about the coincidences he’d once been so quick to brush aside.

Because they made him feel him uneasy, discomfited in every way possible, and Sasuke frowned when he heard Kakashi call his name, bringing him back into the conversation. “You also said I wasn’t allowed to discuss what I read if I did translate the scroll. Wasn’t that one of the terms of the agreement? Or was it that you never expected me to be able to read it in the first place?”

“Hmm…that’s not the easiest question to answer.”

“A yes or no will do.”

“It’s more complicated than that.”

“How much more complicated can it get? It can’t mean—”

“It doesn’t necessarily have to mean anything.”

“Then why can’t you just tell me what’s so important about what’s in the scroll and what it has to do with me?”

“Because I care,” Kakashi said simply and without faltering. But there was a hidden meaning, an implication Sasuke didn’t care to look into, and if weren’t for the listless expression on Kakashi’s face, Sasuke would have been able to assure himself those three words weren’t just a convenient lie. Kakashi did care, but the statement was so ambiguous it could have been taken to mean a host of things.

Sasuke snorted. “You can’t come up with a better excuse?”

“Does telling the truth still make you that uncomfortable?”

“Damn it, don’t—” Sasuke gripped his hands on the edge of the counter; he could feel his knuckles beginning to bruise against the hard surface. He knew better than to think of Kakashi as someone who would pity him, but he couldn’t stand the way Kakashi was looking at him now, couldn’t stand that Kakashi was one of the few people who could read him so well. “Don’t stare at me like that, Kakashi.”

“Whatever it is that’s eating away at you, you need to resolve it before you leave for this mission. I’m not staring at you any differently than normal, and if you can’t see that, well…”

Sasuke closed his eyes.

“The onus is on you.”

“…get out,” Sasuke whispered harshly.

“Suit yourself.” Kakashi stood and pushed the chair back under the table. His footsteps were soft against the floor, light taps that grew louder as he approached Sasuke and quieting when Kakashi stopped beside him. “But Sasuke…”

Sasuke flinched at nearness of Kakashi’s voice and the subtle reprimand hidden beneath the shrewd tone.

“Don’t you want to know how the story ends?”

...

Sasuke hadn’t managed to convince Hotaru to sleep in the guest room after all, not that he even tried, but considering the three of them were already in the bed, Sasuke and Hotaru asleep, it was a little too late for Naruto to complain about Sasuke not coming through on his promise.

Other than the lack of warmth, the sharp elbow digging into his neck, the stuffed turtle pressed against his face, and the small foot trying to indent itself in his stomach, Naruto had somehow managed to get comfortable in the bed. If comfortable meant sharing Sasuke with Hotaru curled up between the two of them, tight hold on Sasuke’s shirt and hogging the blanket from Naruto, sadly, it was probably the most comfortable he would be in bed for a while since Hotaru sneaking into their bed in the middle of the night was becoming a routine.

It hadn’t started like that, of course, and tonight, as Sasuke said in order to persuade Naruto to go shopping, was supposed to be the night with the just the two of them. After coming back inside, Naruto had given Hotaru a bath. This time there were no mishaps in the bathroom but rather in the guest—Hotaru’s—bedroom. Having forgotten Hotaru’s clothes on the bed, Naruto had carried Hotaru, helping him pretend to fly, into the room where Naruto then spent fifteen minutes trying to get Hotaru into the new pyjamas he and Sasuke bought earlier. A considerable chunk of those fifteen minutes was spent making sure Hotaru didn’t take the clothes off.

Initially, Naruto suspected Hotaru simply wasn’t used to wearing a shirt with buttons but quickly dismissed the idea when, as soon as he was dressed, Hotaru unbuttoned the shirt and proceeded to pull off his pants with no hesitation. Dressing Hotaru then became a battle of determination, not so threatening glares, and a test of endurance to see who would blink first. Two and a half minutes into it, Naruto was convinced he had the upper hand. It was only when he saw Hotaru biting his lip and trembling, the kid on the verge of crying, did Naruto concede. A petty tactic, it was a low blow, but it worked; the kid probably knew Sasuke would walk in to see what happened and immediately place the blame on Naruto. So, instead of the pyjamas, Naruto helped Hotaru into one of Naruto’s old t-shirts, which he couldn’t remember placing on the bed, and Hotaru was more than content to let Naruto tuck him in, even giving Naruto a hug that was more or less rubbing salt into Naruto’s wounded pride.

However, as soon as Naruto had tried to leave the room, before he made it through the doorway really, he heard movement coming from the mattress and turned to see that Hotaru had gotten out of bed to follow him. After three more attempts to tuck Hotaru in bed, one of which including turning on the lamp in case Hotaru was afraid of the dark, Naruto eventually settled on lying down with Hotaru, deciding a little nap wouldn’t hurt.

Two hours later, wiping the drool from the side of his mouth, Naruto had woken up to see Hotaru’s chest slowly rising up and down and bit back a curse when the clock told him how long his nap was. He removed himself from the bed carefully, doing his best not to wake Hotaru, and made it to his own room, where Sasuke had already fallen asleep. It was disappointing to see that Sasuke hadn’t even bothered to stay up for him, but Naruto slipped into bed and fell asleep, too.

Not too longer after, Naruto had again woken up but to someone tugging on his hair. He opened his eyes to see Hotaru staring at him, somehow keeping a straight if not somewhat accusatory face while gripping the sheets with one hand, his stuffed turtle in the other, and pulling himself onto the bed.

And really, staring into those eyes, it was during this moment Naruto could identify with how Sasuke felt that first night with Hotaru, when Naruto hadn’t yet been aware of Hotaru’s sleeping habits or the fact that Hotaru was so set against sleeping alone.

Three days of crawling into their bed in the middle of the night was apparently enough for Hotaru to believe it was okay to do it the fourth day, which Naruto didn’t exactly challenge when Hotaru crawled over him—Naruto didn’t exactly challenge the misplaced foot in the crook of his shoulder or the finger that almost took out his eye, either—and rested his head on Sasuke’s pillow. It was probably because Hotaru was used to the idea of Sasuke or Naruto sleeping with him, but Naruto had tried to explain the benefits of Hotaru having a room to himself with a bed that would more than accommodate Hotaru’s strange ability to take up the space of someone three times his size. While Naruto and Sasuke’s bed wasn’t the biggest bed, it was a bed that had always been roomy enough for them. Yet, with the addition of someone like Hotaru, sleeping comfortably was becoming a thing of the past.

It was okay for tonight and most likely would be okay for a few more nights in the future (no more than two or three times a week would be ideal, although Naruto wasn’t sure if Sasuke would be as resolute), but ten years down the line, there was no way Naruto was letting Hotaru get away with sleeping with them. He and Sasuke would be—well, he didn’t want to think about how old he and Sasuke would be then, but Hotaru would definitely be too old for something like this, and Naruto figured ten years would be more than enough time for Hotaru to grow out of this stage.

Hopefully, that would be the cut-off line. If not, then…

As much as Naruto liked Hotaru, to the point where he was willing to sacrifice any assured possibility of alone time with Sasuke for the next decade or so, it didn’t mean he liked the feeling of being confined to the edge of his own bed nor did it mean he liked the pain associated with discovering how much of a liability Hotaru could be in it.

Because being smacked in the nose by the back of Hotaru’s hand was why Naruto woke up for the third time tonight, and the throbbing that still continued somewhere around ten minutes later why he was still awake. The lack of warmth was a factor, too. And while Naruto realised getting another blanket would at least solve one of his problems, he also realised getting said blanket would require moving and getting out of the bed. Being semi-conscious, Naruto wasn’t actually that far from drifting back to sleep. Plus, getting up would also risk him tripping over the turtle that had fallen off the bed, cloaked in darkness and waiting for his foot to take the wrong step—or so Naruto told himself.

It would definitely take time getting used to the way Hotaru slept. In some ways, Naruto could have argued sleeping with Hotaru was a safety hazard. Taking now for instance, when he felt Hotaru reaching for his face, small fingers roaming over his cheeks, one almost finding its way into Naruto’s nostril, it was even more hazardous because Hotaru wasn’t aware he was doing it. But when the hand continued to wander, brushing against the sideburns on Naruto’s face, and fingers tickling his throat just before an arm wrapped itself around his neck—that, Naruto didn’t think would take long to get used to.

So even if Sasuke hadn’t kept his promise, even if being dangerously close to falling off the bed wasn’t the most comfortable position or if Naruto could only lay claim to the corner of the blanket that barely covered his ankle, even if the pain from being hit in the face was still a dull throb—it wasn’t that bad.

And when he felt Hotaru snuggling into his shoulder…

Yeah, Naruto could get used to that, too.

...

As usual, Kakashi withheld from giving any direct answers and made Sasuke all the more irritable for it. Kakashi implying he knew the contents of the scroll didn’t bother him. And while the way Kakashi went about it did bother him at the time more so than it did now, it was rather the simple fact that Kakashi pointedly refused to say anything more that left Sasuke feeling more than irate the next day.

Sasuke had collapsed onto the bed, preoccupied by thoughts of the implications posed by what Kakashi hadn’t said and woke up in the same, weary state of mind. And nine hours of troubled sleep, even if it was nine hours of uninterrupted sleep that Sasuke couldn’t remember much of, wasn’t enough to prepare Sasuke for the shock that followed when he found himself seriously considering Naruto’s idea of possibly, maybe one day, eventually looking for a bigger place to live.

Because it was only a little after seven, and with Hotaru standing on a stool and sandwiched in between Sasuke and Naruto, all three of them trying to squeeze their reflections into the less than adequate width and height that was a single bathroom mirror, Sasuke didn’t think he could take another morning like this.

Besides, a bigger place closer to the Academy would be one less thing to worry about when Hotaru was enrolled in school.

“You left me hanging last night, Sasuke,” Naruto said. His voice was laced with sleep as he lathered shaving cream in between his hands. He daubed it on his chin, onto the stubble hardly worth acknowledging that he tried and failed to convince Sasuke could pass as facial hair. “Seriously, what happened to that thing you promised for you and me—as in, _you_ and _me_?”

“And me, Naruto?” Hotaru piped up, twisting off the cap of his toothpaste.

Sighing, Naruto wiped his hands on a towel and reached for one of the disposable razors in the cabinet. “Yeah, you, too, Hotaru.”

“You were sleeping with Hotaru,” Sasuke said, spitting into the sink. He licked his teeth and swallowed, tasting the residual flavour of mint in his mouth. “Who was I to wake you up?”

After Kakashi left, Sasuke hadn’t been in the mood to indulge Naruto for something he would have done regardless. Even if there was nothing particularly off-putting about the sight of Hotaru lazing across Naruto with his stubby limbs touching nearly every part of Naruto, the sight of the drool trailing down Naruto’s mouth and collecting on the back of Naruto’s arm, however, was.

Naruto paused, giving Sasuke an incredulous look before he scoffed and moved his face closer to the mirror, his elbow barely dodging the top of Hotaru’s head in the process. “Now you’re just being a smartass. Since when did the idea of my beauty sleep prevent you from waking me up? Hold on—let me rephrase that: since when did you care?”

“When I realised how much you actually needed it,” Sasuke said. He covered Hotaru’s hand with his own, slowly directing the bristles of the small green toothbrush into a gentle and circular up and down motion over Hotaru’s front teeth. “You don’t have to scrub so hard.”

Naruto opened his mouth to speak but then closed it as an afterthought. “Okay, what did Kakashi have to say last night?” he said, slowly guiding the razor down the side of his face. “Because, you know, you’re more… _you know_ …than usual.”

It was an abrupt breach into the subject and awkward only for Sasuke because Naruto could be annoyingly perceptive when he wanted to be.

“Nothing important,” Sasuke decided to say.

“In other words,” Naruto translated, tilting his head upward, “Kakashi said something you didn’t want to hear. What was it?”

“Nothing.”

“I’m going to get it out of you sooner or later, so you might as well tell me now.” Not exactly smug, Naruto’s voice was matter-of-fact, as if the statement was simply a matter of relaying some kind of self-evident truth. Maybe it was.

There was a cycle he and Naruto went through, a sporadic sequence of pushes and pulls. It was almost like a twisted game in a sense. Naruto would drive forward, shoving Sasuke toward that boundary Sasuke had set for himself, and Sasuke would yank them both back. They were carelessly edging around that invisible line they inevitability would cross every so often.

Sasuke had, what Naruto liked to call, a masochistic streak that he claimed tempted him into trying to force Sasuke to step outside of his comfort zone. In reality, Naruto had, what Sasuke liked to call, a tendency to nag about something until Sasuke either did something to forcibly shut Naruto up or let Naruto have his way. But when he thought of Hotaru, attempted to establish a connection between Hotaru’s appearance and the scroll, Sasuke remembered one of the conditions of accepting the mission from Tsunade included not discussing the contents of the scroll with anyone else.

And, in this case, because it was something Sasuke did want to talk about willingly, the stipulations included Naruto, as well.

He didn’t appreciate the irony.

“It’s better to bring it out in the open,” Naruto continued, “instead of dragging it out and making it turn into something you can’t handle, which—and let’s be honest here—you won’t be able to, so I’ll have to step in anyway and make wrongs right, blah, blah, blah, and once again restore balance to the world.”

As annoying as it was when Naruto was perceptive, it was even more aggravating to Sasuke when Naruto felt that perception, when it came to Sasuke, gave him the right to be overconfident about it.

“And at the end of the day, _you_ —whoa, watch it.” Naruto cut himself off when Hotaru began to wobble on the stool, he and Sasuke steadying him before Hotaru had a chance to fall. “Be careful.”

Unfazed, Hotaru grabbed Naruto’s shirt and turned to Sasuke. He opened his mouth, giving an exaggerated grin and revealing two small rows of teeth. “I’m finished?”

Taking advantage of the distraction, Sasuke took the towel draped over Naruto’s shoulder. “Let me wipe your mouth.”

“Sakura-chan was right.” Naruto ran his razor beneath running water, rinsing any remaining shaving cream off the blade and placing the razor back in the cabinet. “You really are spoiling him, you know.” 

Ignoring Naruto, Sasuke tried to wipe the smudges of toothpaste on Hotaru’s chin, tried being the operative word since Hotaru kept turning his head away when the towel came too close to his face.

“Sasuke, I want…” Grunting, Hotaru tried to turn away again, but Sasuke grabbed his chin. “Wait, Sasuke. I have to…”

Sasuke gave an exasperated sigh. “What?”

Hotaru held up his toothbrush and began sliding it down the side of his face. “I have to do it like Naruto.”

While Sasuke found himself spluttering, Naruto laughed when he saw Hotaru trying to mimic the act of shaving with a toothbrush. “You’re going to have to wait a few more years on that one. Hopefully you’ll be able to actually grow hair on your face, unlike _some_ people, and be a real ma—”

The wave of charka that appeared and subsequently made Naruto fall on the floor lasted for no more than two seconds. Sasuke stood innocuously by the sink, wiping Hotaru’s face, and gave no indication he had anything to do with the fact that Naruto was now twitching on the floor.

“You didn’t have to…go so far,” Naruto said. Carefully, he stood from the floor, rubbing his back in an inflated exhibit of pain that Sasuke took for the ruse it was.

The moment Sasuke let go of Hotaru’s chin, Sasuke had already anticipated Naruto moving to stand behind him. The towel barely made it back onto the rack when Naruto grabbed both of Sasuke’s arms and turned him around. Sasuke returned the favour, awkwardly grabbing both of Naruto’s wrists but placing enough pressure on them, almost enough to break them.

This was good. Fighting for the sake of fighting was always good. In fact, the potential of taking out any latent frustration carried over from his lack of conversation with Kakashi last night was more than good, and Sasuke knew Naruto needed a way to channel the kind of pent of up energy he tended to build rather quickly. Doing this kind of thing—fighting—it was comparable to rustling with Naruto on the bed, Sasuke losing himself in between sheets laden with sweat and trapped beneath the heat that was Naruto’s body. But they couldn’t afford to get worked up and have it escalate into something that would be better accomplished outside. Not in such a confined space and under no circumstances when Hotaru was staring at them, watching Sasuke and Naruto intently with a dangerous kind of curiosity that reminded Sasuke just how impressionable kids could be.

Yet, at the same time, there was something distracting about standing so close to Naruto, the two of them stilted in some kind of deadlock waiting for the other to make the first move. And the way Naruto was smiling, he must have caught the shiver from Sasuke.

“Not in here,” Sasuke found himself gritting out, surprised by just how much Naruto’s proximity was affecting him.

“Yeah, well…” Naruto grunted, his fingers curling around Sasuke’s forearms as he leaned close enough to touch the tip of Sasuke’s nose with his own. There was this look on his face, a haughty kind of excited grin that seemed exceedingly boyish even with the remnants of shaving cream on Naruto’s chin. “You’re the one who started it. No problem if we’re both holding back, right?”

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the challenging tone in Naruto’s voice, daring Sasuke to pull away. They both knew not to fight in the house. It was an unspoken rule Naruto was constantly trying to break—or bend, whichever one he tried to get away with at the time—and Sasuke wasn’t planning on remodelling the bathroom anytime soon. Once was enough.

“No.”

“You’re still not letting go,” Naruto whispered.

Smirking, Sasuke responded by reversing Naruto’s position. Briefly loosening his hold on Naruto’s wrists, Sasuke quickly reapplied enough pressure to make Naruto wince and unfurl his fingers from around Sasuke’s forearms. Sasuke wriggled out of Naruto’s grasp and lifted Naruto’s arms above his head, wrenching Naruto’s arms back down while twisting them behind Naruto and forcing Naruto to turn around. Sasuke pressed his foot into the small of Naruto’s back, pulling on Naruto’s arms with a look of satisfaction on his face that disappeared as soon as Hotaru reminded Sasuke that he and Naruto weren’t alone.

“Can I play, too?”

Sasuke froze at the sound of Hotaru’s voice. His grip on Naruto’s arm slackened, and he took his foot off Naruto’s back, allowing it to fall back on the floor. Naruto began to stumble as soon as Sasuke let go, falling back against Sasuke, who caught Naruto out of reflex. Thrown off-kilter by the sudden addition of Naruto’s weight in his arms, Sasuke nearly tripped trying to regain his balance while Naruto tried to detangle himself from Sasuke.

“Sasuke,” Hotaru said when Sasuke and Naruto were finally able to break apart. “I want to play like that, too, but Naruto told me Sasuke wasn’t—”

Naruto was quick to cover Hotaru’s mouth and said, with an overcompensating grin, “We’ll teach you how to play like that when you’re older.”

When Naruto removed his hand, Hotaru said, “When I’m older?”

“Yep. I’ll teach you some really cool moves and buy you even cooler stuff. Like in that movie we saw, I’ll show you how to throw a—”

Sasuke cut in before Naruto had a chance to give Hotaru any ideas. “When you’re older.”

“When you’re older,” Naruto repeated.

“Okay, older,” Hotaru said in agreement. He nodded, pausing to peer at Naruto and then settling his gaze back on Sasuke. Only a few seconds passed before he spoke again, his words making Naruto choke and Sasuke cough. “Am I older now?”

...

Since they didn’t see each other as often as they used to, it was easy for Naruto to forget Sakura had a key to his and Sasuke’s house. To make sure she, Naruto, and Sasuke would always stay close was what Sakura said, the supposed reasoning behind the whole thing. In fact, he and Sasuke had a key to her place, too. Not that they used it as much as she used her key, but again it was Sakura’s idea, and Naruto could admit it wasn’t a bad one since it gave them an excuse to see each other with having to come up with an awkward excuse every so often when they did try to catch up and put effort into sustaining their friendship.

But as he stepped through the door, Sasuke gracelessly bumping into him when Naruto stopped without warning, Naruto could say seeing Sakura sitting in a chair she obviously brought from the kitchen, with Ino and Shikamaru on either side of her sitting on chairs also obviously brought from the kitchen, wasn’t usually part of the deal.

The small cake on the coffee table wasn’t something that usually came along with Sakura’ spontaneous visits, either. The white round cake with halves of strawberries decorating the surface along the border as well covering all sides of the cake—the same small cake that barely managed to stand out against the aftermath of confetti and streamers that had apparently attacked the living room in Naruto and Sasuke’s absence. There was a gift by the cake, too, which Naruto noticed had escaped the colourful onslaught. A little smaller than the cake itself, the gift, in the shape of a rectangular box, was wrapped in light blue paper and topped with a pale yellow bow.

Naruto’s gaze trailed across the other items on the table, the short pile of plates alongside a handful of forks and napkins set next to a large knife Naruto distinctly remembered taking away from Hotaru this morning after he found Hotaru going through the drawers in the kitchen and pretending to be a ninja with whatever sharp objects he could find.

Hotaru had almost made a hole in the wall with that knife, and it was only when he heard a collective shout of surprise from Sakura and Ino, with a less than enthusiastic echo from Shikamaru forced by a nudge from Ino, did Naruto take his eyes away from the knife and his eyes settle on the banner hanging on the wall behind his friends.

“Happy Birthday, Hotaru-chan,” Naruto said slowly, reading out loud the characters on the banner written in light blue on a backdrop of white paper. It took a moment for the words to process, to make sense of the situation and for the implications to come to his attention, and Naruto nearly dropped the bag of groceries he was holding when he heard Hotaru repeat the words he just said.

Naruto looked at Sasuke with wide eyes, following the other man as the three of them entered the living room. Sasuke looked as surprised as Naruto felt, maybe even somewhat horrified, and Naruto found himself stammering when he turned to Sakura. “How did—how did you—”

“I was upset at first, I’ll admit,” Sakura said thoughtfully, clasping her hands together and paying no attention to the expressions on Naruto and Sasuke’s faces. “But I can’t believe you told Kiba before you told me,” she added, clearly sounding disappointed. “I haven’t told anyone about it, and I at least expected you to keep me aware of what was going on.”

“That’s not exactly what happened, though,” Naruto said, feeling a pull on his pant leg. He looked down to see Hotaru had taken refuge behind him, remembering how Hotaru was selective in how he chose to behave around people he didn’t know and far from being consistent about it. “Kiba wasn’t—”

“It’s true.” Ino nodded, kneeling down in front of Naruto to get a better look at Hotaru, who peaked at her from the space in between Naruto’s legs. “She didn’t even tell me. And I didn’t know until Shikamaru came complaining to me about the fact that Kiba was complaining to him about it, which centred around, and I quote, the spawn of Naruto and Sasuke who kicked him.”

Sasuke tensed, and Naruto made a mental note to remind Kiba to avoid Sasuke in the future. Of course, he didn’t agree with Kiba’s choice of words, either, but Naruto was also aware Kiba had a habit of saying things before he actually thought about what had the potential of coming out of his mouth. Sasuke was already aware of this, too, but Naruto had a feeling that Sasuke would still be more volatile during that encounter than if Naruto confronted Kiba and simply told him not to refer to Hotaru as his and Sasuke’s spawn anymore.

Shikamaru snorted, placing his hands behind his head as he slouched against the stiff chair, somehow still able to look comfortable. “It was annoying, and no—I wasn’t complaining to you about anything.”

“Right, that’s why you were moping around in my apartment.” Ino rolled her eyes and stood, flicking a strand of hair out of her face. “Anyway, like I said, Sakura didn’t even tell me. And you know…because that means a lot when she can keep her mouth shut about something like this.”

Sakura made a half-hearted cry in protest that Ino brushed aside with a wave of her hand. “Hotaru’s cute, though. I’ll give you that. It’s strange how he looks so much like you, Naruto, but then not so much. I think it’s because of his eyes. They’re still that kind of blue, like yours, but…something about them—I don’t know what—but there’s something there that really does remind me of Sasuke.”

“I’ll take this to the kitchen,” Sasuke muttered, filling in the brief silence that followed Ino’s words as he took the bag out of Naruto’s hands. He headed toward the kitchen, leaving an open-mouthed Naruto to deal with the unexpected appearance of their guests, or hosts as it was, and a Hotaru who seemed content to hide behind him indefinitely.

With a resigned groan, Naruto watched Sasuke disappear with his tail between his legs. It figured that Sasuke would pick the most inopportune time to be anti-social, which was most of the time really, but at least Ino and Shikamaru seemed to tolerate the idea of Hotaru. Although Naruto almost wished they hadn’t accepted it so easily. “Really, I don’t know what to say.”

“A show of appreciation would be nice,” Ino said. “We know it’s not much on a modest living, but we really did take our time to put this together on such short notice.”

“Ino…”

“Come on and have a seat over here. I want the three of you to sit together,” Sakura said excitedly, patting the couch with her hand. “That means you, too, Sasuke,” she called out. “I’m not going to let you hide in the kitchen until you think we’re gone.”

Naruto put a hand on Hotaru’s head, ruffling his hair in an attempt to coax Hotaru to come out from behind him. “So, Ino and Shikamaru, you aren’t…?”

Ino shrugged. “It _is_ weird, yes. Not as weird as you as Sasuke being in a relationship, I’ll say, because that will never stop being weird, but the two of you raising a child?” She paused, adding, with a tinge of grudging respect in her voice, “You don’t even know how this happened, yet going by what Sakura told me, you’re already so accepting of it. If the same thing happened to me, I don’t know if I could do it.”

“It’s not as hard to adjust as you’d think,” Naruto said. “And when I got used to it, things started to feel normal.”

“It hasn’t even been a week, though.”

“It just feels right. I think that’s the only way I can explain it now.”

“Who would have thought you guys would have been the first ones out of all of us to have kids?” Shikamaru said. “Or that you would have kids at all?”

“Together or…?”

“Frankly, neither,” Shikamaru answered a little too honestly. “You two seemed like the least well-adjusted in our group.” He gestured his head in the direction of the kitchen. “Especially, Sasuke.”

“Shikamaru,” Sakura scolded while Ino elbowed Shikamaru in the side. “You shouldn’t say things like that.”

“Considering how things turned out,” Naruto said, “I’ll take that as a compliment.” He looked at Shikamaru thoughtfully. “I guess I can see where you’re coming from, but it’s not like we saw it coming, either, and this ….” Naruto paused, extending his arm out to the side. “This is...”

“Just think of it as more of a belated birthday party or something,” Sakura said. “We were going to do this in the kitchen, but it really was too small for more than three people. That’s why we brought the chairs out here.”

“Plus, it would be more fun to celebrate in a bigger room,” Ino said. “So stop trying to look so cool about it.”

“I’m not trying to look cool about it,” Naruto said. And really, he wasn’t trying to appear indifferent or anything like that. He truly didn’t know how to take it.

It was a sobering thought: that the three people in front of him made up the majority of people who hadn’t completely turned away from Naruto simply because he wouldn’t abandon Sasuke. It had nothing to do with his intimate relationship with Sasuke, which was pretty recent, considering, but those friendships he had built in the past had still suffered, fading with time and no more than a shadow of the bonds he once held, the ones that were deceptively secure. He still kept in contact with them, though, people more than just acquaintances that he couldn’t quite call friends. They only chose to associate themselves with Naruto when Sasuke was out of the picture, preferring to ignore Sasuke’s existence entirely. He didn’t blame them for not forgiving Sasuke, but Naruto had worked hard to find Sasuke, fought so hard to bring Sasuke back and that much harder to make sure Sasuke wouldn’t leave him again, and it had forced Naruto to…

But people like Sakura, Ino, and Shikamaru, people who he could still call friends, as long as he had them. And people few and far in between like Kiba, Lee, and Chouji, if he was still here—

“By not saying anything, are you still trying to be cool?” Ino asked.

“No,” Naruto said softly. “I do appreciate this. And Sasuke does, too, even if he won’t say anything. That you’d be willing to put this together for us, for Hotaru, it really does mean a lot.”

“Then smile and look happy,” Sakura said cheerfully. “So Hotaru can stop hiding behind you long enough to try some of his cake and open his gift.”

“He doesn’t like sweet things,” Sasuke said as he came back from the kitchen. He took a seat on the couch, and Hotaru immediately left Naruto’s side, running to jump in Sasuke’s lap.

“Really?” Sakura said.

Naruto followed Hotaru and sat down beside Sasuke. “From what we know, but he may change his mind. He can be picky like that.”

“Like Sasuke,” Sakura agreed, sharing with Naruto a smile that didn’t go unnoticed by Sasuke.

“Wasn’t Kiba supposed to be here?” Sasuke said, and Naruto wondered why Sasuke would even ask.

“Akamaru’s been sick, and Kiba’s been taking him to see his sister,” Shikamaru said. “And well…he still helped with the gift, though.”

“That’s why Akamaru wasn’t with him, yesterday,” Naruto said. “I meant to ask, but then Kiba kind of ran off on us.”

“We know,” Ino and Shikamaru said in unison.

“Considering Ino was the one who told me, complaining about how Shikamaru was complaining to her about Kiba complaining about Naruto and Sasuke and Hotaru-chan—I’d prefer not go down that path again,” Sakura said in one breath. “Do you want to open your gift first or eat a piece of cake, Hotaru-chan?”

Hotaru looked to Naruto. “Naruto, which…?”

“It’s up to you,” Naruto said.

“Oh, before we start, you already know Lee-san isn’t back from Iwagakure yet, but he still wanted to give his regards.” Sakura picked up the red envelope lying on the table and handed it to Sasuke. “Here. It’s for you and Naruto.”

“So you did tell someone after all?” Naruto said, noticing the faint blush creeping into Sakura’s cheeks.

“Don’t try to tease me like that,” Sakura said, gently nudging Naruto on the shoulder. “You know Lee-san doesn’t count. He really does support you and Sasuke, and he was truly sorry he couldn’t be here.”

“Is he doing okay?”

“Other than missing home, he’s doing well…” Sakura trailed off then shook her head. “What does the letter say, Sasuke?”

Sasuke had already lifted the flap of the envelope and had taken out a small postcard with a picture of clouds tinted by a backdrop of a sunset coloured with hues of violet and red on the front. He turned it around and read it out loud in a flat voice that ironically contradicted the tone of the original sender. 

“I shall spread news of this joyous event. Such dedication and enthusiasm to the bearing of youth shall not go unheard. I congratulate Naruto-kun and Sasuke-san on this most wonderful and exciting endeavour and promise to celebrate and express the full extent of my own enthusiasm upon my return to Konoha.”

“Oh, wow, um...” Naruto licked his lips, able to easily interpret the…passion in Lee’s words. It wasn’t hard to visualise Lee saying it, imagine him kneeling on the floor with a hand clutched to his chest, and Naruto was only partially glad he wasn’t able to see it in person. “I’ll—we’ll,” Naruto corrected, emphasising his inclusion of Sasuke and Hotaru, “make sure to say thanks when he gets back. Or, you know, if you could send a letter for us, Sakura-chan?”

“Never mind that, Naruto,” Sakura said a little too quickly. Blush returning, she added, in a hasty move to change the subject, “Who wants cake?”

Ino snorted, trying to hide laughter that Naruto didn’t see the reason for. She covered her mouth but didn’t say anything about why Sakura looked so embarrassed by what Lee had written. “Hotaru-chan, you would get the first—oh, we don’t have candles.”

“Do you really need candles?” Shikamaru asked, seemingly bored with the turn of events.

The red in her cheeks fading, Sakura said, “No, but it would be nice.”

Naruto thought back to yesterday, recalling Hotaru’s panic-stricken reaction when he saw the oven mitt on fire and the frantic screams that followed when the smoke detector went off. Naruto had scarred Hotaru, and it was probably best not to try and recreate what happened if only for the sake of Naruto’s ability to hear in the future. “Maybe it’s better without candles, or anything to do with fire, really. It’s not even traditional, so it doesn’t matter as much.”

“But still…”

“It’s better to drop it,” Sasuke said.

“I’m assuming there’s a story behind this?” Sakura said.

“One that would take way too long to explain,” Naruto chimed in quickly. “Let’s just skip straight to singing happy birthday then.”

“No,” Sasuke cut in, the same time Shikamaru drawled, “We’re not even sure if it is Hotaru’s birthday. There’s no point to it.”

“Whether it’s really Hotaru-chan’s birthday or not, that doesn’t mean it has to be any less fun,” Ino said. “And since you’re already here, Shikamaru, would it hurt you not to be such a killjoy?”

Seeing Sasuke about to open his mouth, Naruto held up his hand in time to cover it. “Because I know you, I’m begging you not to answer that.”

Sasuke remained silent, pulling Naruto’s hand away from his mouth and giving a careless shrug, which Ino snorted at and Sakura ignored in favour of starting the short countdown from three until the cue to sing.

By the slight wince shared by both Sasuke and Shikamaru, Naruto could only conclude that he, Sakura, and, Ino were completely tone deaf, trying to sing in a language they weren’t exactly familiar with. However, Hotaru was clapping along, making up words to murmur as the song continued, and rocking from side to side in Sasuke’s lap in a way that proved he had no sense of rhythm whatsoever.

The song was over as soon as it had begun, much to the apparent relief of Shikamaru and Sasuke, who Naruto not so playfully nudged on the shoulder for not participating in what Sasuke—whispering low enough in Naruto’s ear that no one else would hear—referred to as a cacophony.

“There. That wasn’t so painful, was it?” Sakura said sardonically at Shikamaru, deeming Sasuke as a lost cause before she turned to Hotaru with a renewed smile on her face. “So, what did you think about your first birthday song? Did you like it?”

Hotaru gave a bashful smile in response. “I like Sakura’s singing.”

“You do?” Sakura gasped, then cooed, then made some odd sound that was a strange mixture of the two that Naruto thought was almost as bad as her singing. “And you know my name, too. Aren’t you just the cutest little—I guess we should have asked before, but how old are you, Hotaru-chan?”

Hotaru held up three fingers, the smile on his face widening as he added, “Three years old.”

Naruto stared at Hotaru and shared a startled glance with Sasuke that was oddly similar to the one he shared with Sasuke yesterday when Hotaru told Kiba his name. It was only somewhat comforting when Ino asked about when his birthday was and Hotaru only shrugged his shoulders, turning his attention back to Sakura and asking for a piece a cake.

“You want a piece of cake?” Naruto asked, mindful of how Hotaru spit out the last piece of cake he ate. “I thought you didn’t like sweet things?”

Hotaru climbed over Sasuke, making the short distance to Sakura while shyly mumbling something about how much he liked strawberries. Naruto didn’t catch all of it.

“Oh, you’re even more adorable now that you like me,” Sakura said, picking up Hotaru and nuzzling her cheek against his in a gesture Hotaru was more than happy to return. “I take back what I said about you being as socially stunted as Sasuke.”

Naruto took notice of the annoyance on Sasuke’s face, but really, Naruto could relate to what Sakura was going through. His own feelings toward Hotaru grew the moment he discovered that Hotaru did like him. However, with Kiba and now Sakura, Naruto was at loss trying to figure out why Hotaru wouldn’t reveal to him or Sasuke—the people taking care of him—something as important as his name or even his age if he knew it all along.

Still, Naruto kept an eye on Hotaru’s wandering hands, not quite forgetting the incident with Tsunade. The moment he saw that telltale smirk on Hotaru’s face and saw those small, chubby fingers reaching for one of Sakura’s nipples, visibly hard and straining to get out of her tight shirt, Naruto was quick to step in and snatch Hotaru from Sakura’s arms.

Hotaru frowned, actually had the _nerve_ to frown, and tilted his head at Naruto in confusion. “Naruto…”

Sasuke, his face displaying a hint of the shame Naruto was terrified to let show, presumably saw what had almost happened and simply shook his head. Yet it seemed Sasuke and Naruto were the only ones who saw that Hotaru was after more than just strawberries, and Naruto was content to deal with the screeching in his ears from Sakura and Ino thinking he was being selfish rather than the more adamant screeching that would result if they found out Hotaru was a pervert.

He could only hope Hotaru appreciated the things he was willing to go through for him, Naruto on the receiving end of Sakura’s fist being one of them.

Holding Hotaru around the waist with one arm, Naruto used his other hand to rub the spot where Sakura hit him on the back of his head. “Why do you always have to hit so hard?” Naruto hissed, though he really was exaggerating. It didn’t hurt.

“I didn’t hit you that hard,” Sakura retorted. “It was a tap more than anything, which you already know. Besides, why did you take Hotaru away from me? I more than get the hint that he’s not mine, but are you really going to be one of those overprotective parent types?”

“Trust me on this one,” Naruto said, not bothering to correct Sakura over the fact she was calling him a parent. “It was for your own good, and you’ll thank me for it later. Remember what we talked about the last time, when I said _why_ I thought Hotaru didn’t want you to hold him?”

“What are you— _oh_.” Sakura’s eyes widened with a sudden realisation, sparing a quick glace to Sasuke, who didn’t quite meet her gaze. “Sorry,” she said sheepishly, trying not to appear too self-conscious as she straightened her shirt. “About the hitting thing, I’m sorry. I’ll forgive Hotaru since he’s so young, but if I had known—oh, Hotaru really _does_ take after you, Naruto.”

Naruto grimaced. The way Sakura said it wasn’t exactly a compliment. Then again, he was incidentally doing the same thing Hotaru was. Except Naruto was more subtle about it, only looking with his eyes since he had no intention to touch Sakura’s breasts—Sasuke being the only reason he needed not to and Sakura’s fist alone being another one good enough to deter Naruto from any idle fantasies.

Ino and Shikamaru looked at Naruto and Sakura strangely, Ino voicing the confusion on her face. “What are you two talking about?”

“Nothing important.” Sakura gave a forced smile and shook her head as she picked up the knife from the coffee table. “Time to cut the cake, right? Hotaru-chan, since you get the first slice…Ino, hand me a plate, please.”

Handing Sakura a plate, Ino said, “No, really, what were you guys talking about? I want in on it, too, especially if whatever it is makes you actually apologise to Naruto for hitting him when he clearly deserved it.”

“What do you mean I clearly deserved it? What kind of stuff is that?” Naruto said. “I’d like to see you get hit in the back of the head for once.”

“I don’t do anything that tempts anyone into hitting me in the back of the head.”

“If you ask me, nobody deserves getting hit in the back of the head.”

“Good thing I didn’t ask you then.”

“But I’ll make an exception in your case since clearly you don’t listen to the things people say about you.”

“What was that? Are you trying to insinuate—”

“Here’s your cake, Hotaru-chan,” Sakura cut in, still wearing the same forced smile on her face as she shoved the plate at Naruto, giving him no choice but to accept it. “Hold this for Hotaru-chan, Naruto. You can share it with him.”

“…um, okay.” Naruto blinked at the plate in his hand, his arm around Hotaru’s waist loosening. Hotaru climbed off Naruto’s lap to stand on the floor and propped his elbows on Naruto’s thigh. “Thank you?”

Sakura nodded her head at Naruto, but her voice was alarmingly calm when she spoke to Ino. “Would you like a piece, too?” she asked slowly, holding the knife upright next to her face. The light from the ceiling reflected on the blade in an eerily threatening manner, and if Sakura’s smile appeared just a little bit brighter because of it, no one brought it up; although Naruto really was trying to ignore the way Hotaru kept reverting his attention back to the knife.

“Sure,” Ino said cautiously, and, like Naruto, accepted the piece of cake shoved in her direction.

“And I know you don’t usually eat cake, but,” Sakura began, cutting a small slice for Sasuke that was more of a slither and nowhere close to being generous, “you do like strawberries, don’t you?”

Reluctantly, Sasuke took the plate Sakura handed to him, and Naruto noticed Sakura had scrapped off most of the frosting from the cake.

“What about you, Shikamaru?” Sakura asked.

Shikamaru sat up in the chair and reached for a plate, holding it out for Sakura. “If you don’t mind.”

“Of course not. We’re all here to celebrate a day for Hotaru-chan, right?” Sakura said with another of those forced smiles that Naruto was beginning to find more intimidating that reassuring. “And since you did make the cake, it would be a shame if it went to waste.”

Snorting, Shikamaru grumbled about not mentioning the fact he made the cake.

“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” Ino said, licking the cake crumbs on from her lips. “So you made a cake. It’s not like we didn’t know you could bake, and besides, it’s really good.”

“It is,” Naruto agreed. He cut a small section of his piece of cake with his fork and raised it in front of Hotaru’s mouth. “Want to try it?”

Hotaru made a face and turned his head from the piece of cake, pushing the fork away with his hand.

“Sasuke likes it,” Sakura said, though by the expression on Hotaru’s face, the fact that Sasuke was eating the cake didn’t appeal to him.

Blinking at Sakura, Hotaru said, “I don’t want cake.”

Sakura set her plate on the table, beside the small box she then picked up and gave to Hotaru. “Okay, what about your gift, then? Would you like to open that?”

“Is it…?”

“You’ll have to open it to find out what it is. Here.” Sakura leaned forward and peeled off some of the blue wrapping paper. “You start like this, see?”

Hotaru looked at her blankly, fiddling with the box that Ino then took it upon herself to help him to finish unwrap when he continued to stare at Sakura.

“There,” Ino said. “That’s how it’s done.”

“Oh, wow.” Naruto peered at the box. It was a camera, and the colour was a purple just dark enough to look blue. It was far from being the latest piece of technology, an older model that came out a few years back, but it didn’t keep Naruto from finding the gift incredibly thoughtful. “You guys really didn’t have to do this.”

Sakura smiled in reply. "It’s nothing fancy, but since it’s no longer just you and Sasuke, we thought you’d like to make new memories." Better memories, was the part she left unsaid.

“I don’t…” Hotaru moved closer to Sasuke, his brows furrowing in concentration as he narrowed his eyes at the box. “Sasuke…it’s a—it’s a carame?”

“Camera,” Sasuke corrected, repeating the world slowly with a pause in between each syllable as he used his finger to point out the corresponding characters on the box.

Interested, Shikamaru looked at Hotaru appraisingly. “He can read that well already?”

Naruto nodded. “Hotaru’s good with stuff like that. I know he seems quiet now, but that’s because he doesn’t know you guys. Usually, he asks a lot questions and picks up on things pretty easily.”

“I guess being a teacher’s assistant does come in handy,” Ino said.

Sakura ran a hand through Hotaru’s hair, smiling while she watched Hotaru continue to examine the box. “No, Sasuke’s just that good with kids.”

Sasuke focused his attention on picking up the scraps of wrapping paper Ino had dumped on the couch, the slight tension in his body telling Naruto how uncomfortable he was with the sudden attention from Ino and Shikamaru. Although Sasuke had been working with Iruka for the last two years, the idea of Sasuke being able to work well with kids, that the job consisted of more than doing menial tasks for Iruka, was something most people still had trouble believing.

“How about we get this thing open,” Naruto said loudly, bringing Ino and Shikamaru’s gazes on him while he held out his hand to Hotaru. “Let me see it for a sec.”

“Can Naruto open it?” Hotaru said.

“Do you really need to ask?” Naruto scoffed in mock disbelief. “Of course, I can op—Sasuke, can you open this?”

As Sasuke snorted and took the box, Sakura stifled her laughter with her hand. “So, have you and Sasuke made it official, yet?”

“Huh?” Naruto turned to Sakura. “Made what official?”

“Adopting Hotaru.”

“Well, we already picked up the paperwork from the family registry this morning.”

“Have you decided on which name Hotaru will take?” Ino asked.

“Ah, that…” Truthfully, they hadn’t. The last attempt, though not serious on Naruto’s part, had led to tackling, kissing, and nothing really productive. Naruto wasn’t going to be a pushover about something as important as passing along his name, and Sasuke wouldn’t be one, either. Paperwork they had, but as far as actually filling it out was concerned, there would be some time before that happened.

“We haven’t exactly—Hotaru, what?” Naruto looked at the plate of cake Hotaru didn’t want to eat being shoved into his lap. Except for a few bite marks that were too small to be Naruto’s, Hotaru hadn’t touched the cake, but apparently that didn’t include picking off the strawberries.

“I’m finished,” Hotaru said proudly.

“You ate all of the strawberries?”

Hotaru grinned. There was a trace of white frosting covering his upper lip like a moustache. His teeth were stained pink and a trail of red juice was dripping down the side of his chin.

Naruto reached for a napkin to wipe Hotaru’s face. “We were supposed to be sharing. You didn’t even leave one for me?”

Hotaru opened his mouth, and Naruto could see the chewed up pieces of strawberries floating around near the back of Hotaru’s throat.

Sakura looked appalled, and Ino disgusted, but Hotaru immediately closed his mouth when Sasuke told him to do so.

“Sorry, Sasuke.”

However, Naruto was still trying to get over the fact that Hotaru hadn’t left him any strawberries. True, there was more cake on the table, but Hotaru didn’t leave him anything. “I can’t believe—didn’t you tell Sakura-chan you don’t like cake?”

“I like strawberries, Naruto,” Hotaru said, like the statement was supposed to explain everything.

“What about the rest of the cake? You already ate all of the strawberries. Why give it back to me if you don’t like it?”

Hotaru scrunched his nose, uncurling a fist at his side to reveal a napkin he’d been holding. He opened it, showing Naruto where he had spit out the piece from the cake he’d bitten into.

“All right, that’s even more...” Sakura sighed. “That’s not a nice thing to show someone, either, Hotaru-chan.”

“No?”

Naruto shook his head. “Well, that and showing people the food in your mouth is definitely something you’re generally not supposed to do. Yesterday was an exception, all right?”

“Oh.” Hotaru lowered his head, and Naruto was quick to place a finger beneath Hotaru’s chin, gently lifting his head back up.

“Hey, don’t worry too much about it, though. Learning what not to do is part of growing up, and Sakura-chan is just being dramatic.”

“Like Naruto?”

Naruto felt his right eye begin to twitch. “Now, I wouldn’t go that—”

“Yes,” Ino cut in, and though it was said in an attempt to appease Hotaru, Naruto couldn’t help but feel she was taking a jab at him, too. “Just like Naruto.”

“Although constantly being around someone like Naruto, it only makes sense that you wouldn’t know better,” Sakura told Hotaru, gently squeezing his arm in reassurance. “Sasuke’s presence can only do so much.”

“Why is it always me? Doesn’t Sasuke ever do anything wrong in your eyes?”

“He’s still Sasuke,” Ino answered, not able to hide the teasing note in her voice. “That hasn’t changed.”

Without breaking eye contact with Hotaru, Sakura said, “I didn’t mean to make you upset, but try not to do things like that, okay?”

“Okay,” Hotaru said softly, reaching for a few slices of strawberries on the rest of the cake. His fingers dug into the frosting, puncturing the cake and inadvertently putting Naruto off from wanting another piece before he plopped the strawberries in his mouth. Frosting was smeared on his lips, coated with cake crumbs, and neither did much to take away from the smile on Hotaru’s face that Naruto wanted to call defiant.

Shikamaru snorted, mumbling about troublesome kids when Hotaru opened his mouth again to show everyone what was left of the food he hadn’t yet swallowed.

...

Sasuke paused mid-step, standing in the doorway and torn between amusement and bewilderment. Honestly, he’d expect this kind of thing from Naruto. Catching Naruto studying himself in front of the full length mirror in their bedroom wasn’t something new to Sasuke. Naruto wasn’t one to shy away from an audience, especially if the audience consisted solely of Sasuke, and considering how much time they spent together, Naruto engaged in this kind of activity more than Sasuke cared for. It was almost as bad as Naruto’s habit of walking around naked in the house, exposing his so called glory to a Sasuke who was unfortunately desensitised by now.

However, it was a kind of vanity that Naruto was evidently passing on to a disturbingly eager Hotaru susceptible to Naruto’s antics, which Sasuke, in good conscious—what was left of it—couldn’t ignore. More and more Sasuke was beginning to see Hotaru truly as an amalgamation of both himself and Naruto, with aspects of Naruto becoming more prominent than before.

Hotaru was a pervert, knowingly obnoxious, Sasuke was convinced, only with Naruto around to promote it, and it was this seemingly drastic change from the quiet kid Hotaru used to be that Sasuke didn’t know what to do with.

“What are you doing?” The question was rhetorical, but at Naruto’s self-indulgent expression, Sasuke immediately regretted asking it. Bearing in mind Naruto lacked the decency of wearing a shirt, clad only in his blue and white striped boxers with a similarly dressed Hotaru at his side, Sasuke should have known better than to have bothered asking at all. 

“What does it is look like I’m doing?” Naruto said.

“Teaching Hotaru there’s nothing wrong with having no understanding of the concept of self-respect?”

“Okay, _ouch_.” Naruto feigned a wince that quickly turned into a grin. “But that just means you see something you like. Admit it, Sasuke,” he said slyly. “You can’t deny _this_.” Turning to the side, Naruto clenched his teeth and flexed his right arm out to the side, his left arm curving in front of his stomach as he leaned forward slightly to reveal the definition in his back.

Naruto wasn’t bulky by any means. His muscles were firm, but like with Sasuke, were mostly lean and compact. It really wasn’t anything impressive, which Sasuke was sure to let Naruto know despite how many times Naruto tried to convince Sasuke otherwise.

“Yes,” Sasuke said, “I can.”

"Tch. Yeah, right, you know you like the idea of us posing like the strong men we are.” Naruto tapped his arm with two fingers and glanced at Hotaru. “There’s no way you can resist these babies. Right, Hotaru?”

“Right,” Hotaru said, nodding his head, and doing what Sasuke could only think of as a comical impression of whatever Naruto referred to as posing. He studied his reflection carefully, brows furrowing as a look of intense concentration overcame his face.

“Show Sasuke what I taught you so far.”

Really, Sasuke did want to protest, but Hotaru then beamed at him, a disarming smile on his face that conveyed how much he wanted to impress Sasuke.

“Watch me, Sasuke, watch me,” Hotaru said excitedly, raising both arms above his head and contracting the undeveloped muscles in his biceps. He growled, or at least made a noise that Sasuke assumed was supposed to be a low growl. Instead, it sounded more like a constipated and garbled mewl. It was only fitting since the same could be said of whatever kind of guttural noise Naruto was making, as well, but Sasuke refrained from commenting on the scene entirely, wary of the strong temptation to say the first thing on his mind. “Look at my muscles—see?”

“I…see,” Sasuke said slowly, unable to think of a suitable response, but it was enough to appease Hotaru, whose smile, if possible, was even wider than before.

“Good job,” Naruto said. “Do the next one I showed you.”

Hotaru nodded at Naruto with a frightening amount of conviction, the same amount of conviction Sasuke found that was beginning to appear more frequently on Hotaru’s face that began the moment after Hotaru saw _that_ movie—the one where Sasuke fell asleep during the beginning while Naruto and Hotaru had finished watching it together—the day before yesterday, when the three of them lounged on the couch. And it was the same amount of conviction, Sasuke also found, that precluded instances that demonstrated how quickly Hotaru became devoted to the idea of becoming like the ninja depicted in said movie. Of those instances, from only this morning, included was Hotaru’s intent of trying to scale the kitchen wall with a knife that was supposed to substitute as a rudimentary kunai.

Or at least that was what Sasuke envisioned and was told had happened after he walked in on Naruto trying to explain to Hotaru the difference between the kunai he saw in a movie and a knife he found in a kitchen, and why Hotaru couldn’t use either to climb the walls in the kitchen or any walls in the house, and going back and adjusting his explanation to include that Hotaru was too young to use any kind of knife at all.

Not wanting to encourage the possibility of Hotaru making any holes in the wall as well as wanting to prevent the almost certain kind of accident that came whenever kids and knives were not mutually exclusive, Sasuke’s response was to hide the knives in the cabinet, high above where Hotaru couldn’t reach them.

“Look, Sasuke.” With an audible inhale, Hotaru placed both arms in front of his chest, elbows facing outward and fists opposing each other. Body taunt as much as the body of a three year old could be, he began to take short, quick breaths. His cheeks were puffed and held a tinge of red in them. There was a determination in his eyes as his breathing became more erratic. The flush on his cheeks extended to the rest of his face, travelled down to his neck, and Naruto stepped in before Hotaru had the opportunity to render himself unconscious.

“Wait a minute—wait a minute, breathe, Hotaru.” Rubbing circles on Hotaru’s back, Naruto laughed. “You don’t have to hold to your breath, okay?”

Hunched over, Hotaru nodded. He was still huffing, frame slightly trembling from the overexertion, but his breathing was more regulated.

“I think that’s enough for tonight,” Naruto said.

Silently, Sasuke wanted to replace the notion of tonight with never doing again. “If you take a bath now, you’ll be ready for bed by the time Naruto comes back.”

“Sasuke…” Hotaru shimmied into the green and blue boxers big enough for him to grow into and pulled the waistband up to his chest. “Can I train with Naruto tomorrow, too?”

“Train?” Sasuke blinked, gave Naruto a strange look, and then blinked again. “You’re calling this training?”

“To be a ninja, Sasuke,” Hotaru explained.

“To be…”

Although they picked up the forms to submit Hotaru to the family registry office this morning, Sasuke and Naruto still hadn’t discussed which family name to give Hotaru, and Naruto was already thinking about training? Before Hotaru could even be enrolled in school, he would first have to be legally recognised to be integrated into society. More importantly, what happened in the bathroom this morning withstanding, it was so… _irresponsible_ , even by Naruto’s standards, to make such a premature decision and encourage those kinds of thoughts in the mind of a three year old.

In the last five days, the most significant conversation he and Naruto did have concerning which name to give Hotaru consisted of Naruto making various suggestions on how they should decide: playing jankenpo, which caused Sasuke to stare at Naruto incredulously at the thought of a game of rock-paper-scissors ever being an effective means of making an important decision like choosing a name; rolling a die, with the highest number determining whether Hotaru took the name Uzumaki or Uchiha, which brought Sasuke out of his temporary stupor and prompted him to punch Naruto in the arm for merely coming up with the idea, much less thinking Sasuke would be agreeable to it; and drawing either name out of a hat, for which Sasuke’s attempt to hit Naruto somehow ended up with both of them on the floor.

From there, a brief wrestling session ensued and had led to Naruto making use of his mouth for means decidedly better than talking by sucking on Sasuke’s neck. It was only when Hotaru, who was convinced at the time that Naruto had been trying to eat Sasuke, tried to save Sasuke by jumping on Naruto’s back, did Naruto and Sasuke pull away from each other, after which Sasuke finally realised that Naruto had been purposely goading him.

Choosing a name would be difficult enough taking into account that their relationship wasn’t recognised in the registry, and it would come down to Hotaru being registered under only one of them.

Restoring the Uchiha name wasn’t the priority it once was, superficial as it seemed to Sasuke now, and something he preferred not to dwell on, not since Itachi...

It wouldn’t have made a difference even if the continuation of his family name held as much of an influence over Sasuke as it used to, though. Other than by appearance, Hotaru had little to do with Sasuke or Naruto, which Tsunade had already confirmed from her tests last Saturday. Hotaru wasn’t biologically related to either of them. However, deciding Hotaru’s family name was something he and Naruto did need to have an in-depth discussion about and something that should be discussed before they did any other kind of major decision making.

Flatly, Sasuke said, “You’re training Hotaru to be a ninja.”

Naruto made a frazzled gesture with his hands. “About that…see–”

“There is no _see_. You’re making decisions without me. We haven’t talked about that, and it’s far too early for this kind of thing, regardless. He’s only three, Naruto— _three_. Remember how he tried to climb the wall in the kitchen this morning…with a _knife_?”

“I know. You don’t have to tell me because I was there. And okay, yeah, the knife was going a little overboard, so we’ll limit what movies he can watch from now on, but I don’t see the problem with teaching him about something that’s unavoidable. Plus, it’s not like we’re training in the literal sense of the word. You know me better than that.”

“That’s not the poi—never mind.” Sasuke ran a hand through his hair. “You should go before the store closes.”

“What are you talking about?”

“There’s no film for Hotaru’s camera.”

Naruto looked at Sasuke expectantly. “Which means?”

“Which means you’re going to buy film for Hotaru’s camera.”

“This late?” Naruto glanced at the clock, which read a quarter after seven. “It can’t wait until tomorrow?”

Sasuke looked at Naruto with a blank expression on his face. “You’re the one who said you would get it earlier because you couldn’t wait until tomorrow to take pictures.”

“I did?” Naruto tilted his head to the side. “I don’t remember this.” 

“You said it when we were taking care of the mess in the living room,” Sasuke answered, which, the act itself, was pretty vindictive considering the people who made the mess had given them petty excuses not to clean the mess they’d made. Sakura had claimed she left her dryer on, still insistent when Sasuke pointed out the flawed logic since the dryer would have automatically cut off by that point. Ino had suddenly remembered about a show she wanted to watch, which Naruto pointed out wouldn’t come on until the day after tomorrow. Shikamaru actually had the gall to say that cleaning would be too bothersome. All three of them had left before even offering to pick up the confetti and the streamers they littered on the furniture and on the floor in the first place.

But Hotaru had enjoyed himself, and it was the only thing keeping Sasuke from thinking too much into the situation while simultaneously keeping at bay his displeasure at having to pick up a mess that he hadn’t made.

Barely.

“Really?” Naruto asked, and Sasuke ignored the scepticism in his voice.

“You said it twice already because you said couldn’t wait until tomorrow.” Sasuke placed both hands on Naruto’s shoulders, tightening his grip yet miraculously resisting the urge to shake Naruto into remembering. “I’m reminding you this time,” he said slowly.

“I shouldn’t, but I guess I have no choice but to take your word for it.”

With a sigh, Sasuke released his grip on Naruto’s shoulders in a not so subtle gesture of surrender. “Come here, Hotaru,” Sasuke said, extending his hand to Hotaru’s. “Go get your bubble bath, and I’ll run your water.”

Hotaru didn’t move.

“Hotaru,” Sasuke said again, pronouncing the name deliberately in an uncompromising tone of voice.

“But _Sasuke_ ,” Hotaru whined— _whined_ —and no matter how much Sasuke wanted to deny it, the whine in Hotaru’s voice was unmistakable.

Feeling a swell of anger rising within him, Sasuke felt it was only reasonable when he came to the conclusion that Naruto’s influence was the cause of Hotaru’s behaviour. Any thoughts of Hotaru behaving normally as any kid would were pushed to the side, and Sasuke levelled a glare at Naruto.

“What are you looking at me like that for?” Naruto said, glancing at Sasuke warily as he took out a t-shirt hanging in the closet. “Stop looking at me like I did something wrong. It’s not always my fault.”

“Most of the time it is,” Sasuke shot back.

“To hell with it, Sasuke, stop trying to make me feel guilty for something I didn’t do. Most of the time does not mean _all_ of the time, and then it’s not even that,” Naruto retorted, walking toward the dresser.

“And now you’re saying that it’s something I did?”

“No. _No_ , that’s not what I said. Sometimes, I’m the one to blame, but I can’t come up with a good reason for you to be mad at me this time. Seriously, I don’t even know what you’re talking about, and you know what…” Naruto trailed off. After finding a pair of black pants and snatching them out with his hand, he slammed the drawer shut. “Look, I get why you’re always bitchy whenever Kakashi comes over. He pushes your buttons. I understand that, and normally I wouldn’t mind, but could you lay off me a little—just for now?”

Sasuke scoffed in disbelief. “And again you’re putting it back on me. I’m the one looking too much into things, is that it? Is that why—?”

“Later,” Naruto interrupted, flopping on the bed and lifting his foot to pull the hem of his pants over his ankle. “Can we do this later, all right?” Naruto sighed. “I don’t want to ruin Hotaru’s day. He shouldn’t see us like this.”

Sasuke pressed his tongue against his teeth, letting his silence concede as the closest he would get to an apology. Naruto was…right. Kakashi’s words from last night had more of an impact than he initially thought. He was using Naruto as a convenient means of taking out his anger, but it wasn’t something Sasuke was going to readily admit aloud. Not when the one time when he was actually willing to speak to Naruto about what was bothering him, his suspicions of Hotaru’s connection to the scroll and Kakashi’s possible involvement were something Sasuke was obligated not to bring up.

As if he were acutely aware of Sasuke’s conflicting emotions, Hotaru ran to Sasuke and gripped Sasuke’s shirt. He reached for Sasuke’s arm, motioning to Sasuke that he wanted to be carried. “I’m sorry, Sasuke.”

“You don’t have to apologise.” Sasuke leaned down to pick Hotaru up and sighed when Hotaru’s arms made their way around his neck. “It’s not your fault, Hotaru.”

“I don’t want…”

Sasuke hugged Hotaru a little tighter, closing his eyes and pressing his face against Hotaru’s shoulder. It was almost like meeting Hotaru for the first time again, standing outside of the front door, bombarded with an armful of this strange kid appearing to be a younger version of Naruto who refused to let him go, and it scared Sasuke how much five days could suddenly feel like five years.

“It’s okay,” Sasuke said softly, startled when he felt another pair of arms around him. He looked up in surprise to see Naruto had placed himself in front of Sasuke, putting Hotaru between them as he rested his chin in the crook of Sasuke’s neck. “Naruto, what are you—?”

“Just let me have this moment,” Naruto said, voice muffled by Sasuke’s shirt. “I never really get to see you like this. And I know you don’t want people to see you like this, but this is me, and I like this part of you, too, just as much as I like the rest of you, all right?” He nudged his cheek against Sasuke’s neck. “So do me a big favour and don’t say anything for a few seconds. And if you give this to me, then…then, I promise I won’t bother you for an entire thirty minutes.”

Sasuke felt himself relaxing and silently counted to three. “Promising not to bother me for anything more than five minutes—or is that just wishful thinking on my part?”

“If you want me to be honest, probably—okay, yeah, but will you accept me not bothering you until I get back from the store?” Naruto grinned into Sasuke’s shoulder. “Does that work, too?”

Sasuke snorted, and the sound developed into a light laughter. It intermingled with an irritatingly persistent and intermittent choking noise originating from the back of his throat and gradually faded behind a smile that was gone by the time Sasuke pushed Naruto away. “Are you leaving or not?”

“Isn’t this the part where I’m supposed to stay, and the three of us are supposed to—?”

“No,” Hotaru said with a shake of his head. He motioned for Sasuke to put him down, and, when his feet hit the floor, immediately ran to grab the camera on the bed.

“What do you mean _no_?”

“You said we can take pictures before I go to sleep.” Hotaru opened the back of the camera, pleased with the fact he could prove to Naruto that there was no film inside. “Sasuke said I don’t have film. See, I don’t have film.”

“I do see,” Naruto said. “It seems you’re in on this conspiracy, too.”

Hotaru nodded impatiently, as if he was trying to instil into Naruto how dire it was that they took pictures before Hotaru was supposed to go to bed. “You have to hurry up, Naruto.”

“You have to hurry up, Naruto,” Naruto mimicked teasingly, breaking out into a grin when he saw the beginnings of a pout on Hotaru’s face. “Okay, I’m going—I’m going.”

“Now?”

“It’s amazing how bossy you are.” Naruto gently tapped Hotaru on one of his temples. Glancing at Sasuke, he added, “How bossy the both of you are.”

“And you still haven’t left yet?”

...

“Naruto?”

“Iruka-sensei, I just, um…”

“I’m on my way home, but what are you doing out here by yourself?” Iruka asked, taking a seat next to Naruto on the swings. It couldn’t have been comfortable, squeezing into such a small space, but he managed to steady himself on the narrow piece of wood.

“Just thinking about some stuff, you know.” Naruto tightened his hold on one of the ropes suspending the seat. “I can’t remember the last time I actually sat on this thing,” he said softly.

In truth, Naruto had come here on a whim, going with a sudden urge that flashed in his mind the moment he left the store. Bringing Hotaru here just seemed like something he and Sasuke should do. Running around on a playground was something kids _did_ do, and Naruto could imagine Hotaru laughing, wearing that contagious grin so familiar to his own and the wind blowing in his face like he was flying instead of merely going back and forth on a swing.

But then he and Sasuke would have to be careful because Hotaru would probably try to jump off the swing if given the chance. It seemed like the kind of thing Hotaru would do; it was the kind of thing Naruto watched other kids do when he was younger, pushing each other as high as they could and jumping off even though the adults told them it was dangerous. And Naruto would have done it, too, but back then, he didn’t have anyone to push him.

Iruka cleared his throat. “Where are Sasuke and…?”

“Hotaru,” Naruto filled in.

“Right,” Iruka said uncomfortably. “Hotaru.”

Naruto frowned but stopped himself from making a comment. Given that Kakashi had been at the house last night, Naruto had assumed he would have told Iruka about Hotaru’s name. It only made sense; the two of them had some sort of fringe benefit relationship Naruto couldn’t begin to understand. Kakashi had almost no regard for privacy towards anything that involved Sasuke and essentially passed on any information to Iruka, with Iruka doing the same thing when it came to Naruto. He supposed it was mostly due to Kakashi’s strange roundabout way of showing that he cared, which didn’t necessarily excuse Iruka, who was more than willing to voice his concerns directly to Naruto. And while Naruto did agree with Sasuke, although not as often, that it tended to get annoying after a while—they were too old to need baby-sitters, however negligent Kakashi and Iruka actually were—a small part of Naruto did think there was something reassuring about simply knowing that someone cared.

“Didn’t Kakashi…?”

“He did.” Iruka shifted on the swing. “I…forgot.”

“Oh.” Naruto didn’t need to mention that Iruka wasn’t a forgetful person. Iruka not caring enough to remember the name of someone who’d become an important person in Naruto’s life said much more than Naruto wanted to hear.

“Well, they’re at home. Ino and Sakura-chan threw a surprise birthday party for Hotaru, and he should be out of the tub by now. He’s waiting for me before he goes to bed.”

“That’s…nice.”

“Yeah, Shikamaru came, too, and don’t let him know I told you, but he was the one who made the cake. It was really thoughtful of them even if they didn’t stick around to clean up.” Despite Iruka’s apparent unease with the topic, Naruto couldn’t help the small smile that came to his face. “Everyone pitched in to buy Hotaru a camera but didn’t remember to get film, and I…” With his toe, Naruto prodded the small plastic bag sitting by his other foot. “I came out to get some film so we could take pictures soon. According to Sasuke, I said something about it earlier, and he and Hotaru kept pestering me, so…”

“Naruto…”

“Yeah?”

“I know I shouldn’t say anything else about it, but…”

“About what?” Naruto’s forehead scrunched in confusion. “Hotaru?”

“Maybe it’s because I’m not able to handle the fact that you seemed to have moved on without me.”

“Iruka-sensei…”

“Something like that, I suppose is part of why—” Iruka cut himself off with meek laughter. “This _thing_ —whatever is going between you, Sasuke, and…Hotaru—still seems too rash to me. Can you honestly say you’re prepared to take care of someone else, to have someone else fully dependent on you?”

“Yes,” Naruto said without hesitation.

“Who’s going to take care of him while you’re gone on missions?”

“Sasuke.”

“Is that really fair to him?”

“But I’ll do the same thing,” Naruto protested, trying not to let Iruka’s words affect him too much. “I’ll take care of Hotaru when Sasuke’s gone. We’ve decided we’re going to share the responsibility, and when we’re both gone, Sakura-chan and Ino have already offered to watch him if they can. And because that’s not going to work out all the time, we’ve already started looking for a part-time nanny or somebody qualified to take care of Hotaru. Yeah, it’s really going to cut into our budget, but even when Sasuke and I get the whole registry thing straightened out, it’ll be a few years until Hotaru can go to the Academy.”

“You’ve thought that far ahead?”

Somewhat disheartened by the words, Naruto said, “Why do you sound so surprised, Iruka-sensei?” 

For a moment, Iruka looked haggard, worn, so much older than Naruto could ever remember seeing him, and Naruto felt some of his frustration fade away.

Using his feet, Iruka propelled himself backward on the swing. “I guess that means no more calling him kid or brat,” he tried to joke.

Naruto wiggled his eyebrows. “Only when Sasuke’s around.”

“Naruto,” Iruka began to chide, faltering when Naruto started laughing.

“I’m joking. No, really, I am.” Naruto dug the heel of his shoe into the ground, laughter settling into a smile. “I know I used to call him that a lot, but the weird thing is that now I can’t seem to stop saying his name. There’s just something about saying Hotaru, you know.”

"That’s unexpected.”

“It is, isn’t it?” Naruto squinted then opened his eyes wide in surprise. “Oh, did I tell you? This morning, Hotaru saw us fighting. Me and Sasuke.”

“You weren’t really—”

“Nah, it wasn’t anything serious because there’s only that much space in the bathroom.” Naruto held out his hand for Iruka to see, putting no more than a few centimetres between his thumb and index finger to give Iruka an idea of how small the bathroom was.

“But Hotaru was really excited about it—even said he wanted to be as strong as me and already has it in his head that he’s going to be a ninja by tomorrow.” Naruto lowered his head in an attempt to avoid meeting Iruka’s eyes. He didn’t want to seem arrogant, but having someone look up to him like that was definitely…something that made him feel good. “Sasuke, too, but he was looking at me when he said it,” he added, looking up with a wide grin that Iruka didn’t return.

“It’s already hard for me to accept this, Naruto, and when you say things like that…”

Naruto frowned, slightly defensive as he leaned over his legs. He rested his arms on his thighs and sat forward on the swing. “I thought we were over this. You’re the one who even fought to give Sasuke a second chance. Is that what this is about? Why you’re having problems with Hotaru? I’m trying to ignore it. Really, I am, but if you’re trying to imply something about Sasuke—”

“That’s not what I’m saying. I shouldn’t have to remind you I have your best interests in mind, and it’s because of it that I’m still not fully convinced you’re taking this seriously. There are too many repercussions involved with such a decision—for both you _and_ Sasuke.”

Naruto looked at Iruka warily. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“Nothing you don’t already know, Naruto.” Iruka closed his eyes. “So…how are you coping with this new responsibility?”

“It’s…”

“Fun?”

“That wasn’t the word I was going for,” Naruto said wryly. “But yeah, it’s a lot more fun having Hotaru around than I thought it would be.”

“I’ll admit that’s one of the reasons I’m having trouble coming to terms with how things are progressing with Hotaru in the picture.”

Again, Naruto frowned. Even though he was older, he still saw Iruka as his mentor and took to heart much of what Iruka said. He couldn’t understand why Iruka was still going back to this, what about it made him so unwilling to accept it. It wasn’t a secret that Iruka didn’t support Naruto’s relationship with Sasuke, yet it bothered Naruto that Iruka seemed so set against the idea Hotaru living with them and was uncharacteristically stubborn enough to keep bringing it up at every turn in the conversation. 

“Even if we wanted to, which we don’t, it’s a little too late to change our minds,” Naruto said.

“I’m not against it, per se, but a child is not something you can throw away when you’re no longer interested. It’s a commitment. To raise a child takes …”

“Other than the obvious?”

With a sigh, Iruka opened his eyes. “…it takes sacrifice.”

There was a long silence between the two, and Naruto fought not to fidget under Iruka’s penetrating gaze. More than ten years later, and this man could still reduce him to feel like that brash little kid he used to be, no matter how much he thought he’d changed since then.

“You know, Iruka-sensei, I get what you’re saying. I do. And if I hadn’t spent the last four nights being Hotaru’s personal punching bag, I probably wouldn’t be looking forward to being it again tonight. It’s like…yeah, we still don’t know where Hotaru came from, who or even what he is, and it’s all this jumbled mess because we _know_ everything’s happening too fast, but at the same time—when Hotaru looks at me, when all he sees is me—that one moment becomes so real that I wonder if it fills a little part of me I didn’t know I was missing.”

“I didn’t know you felt so deeply about it.”

“…I didn’t know, either.” Naruto rubbed his forehead, taken back by his own words. “But isn’t it okay to just let things happen every once in a while?”

“I’m afraid I can’t offer any advice.” Iruka looked at the ground. “Not this time, I think. I know I’ve been voicing my doubts to you, but as much as I’d like to give you a straight answer—what I think you should do—I also know it’s something you’ll have to find out by yourself.”

“Helpful as always, huh?”

“Believe it or not, you’re still growing up. You may be older physically, but growing up emotionally is one of the few constants in life, and full maturity of the mind is one of those things we never quite achieve.”

“It’s amazing how you can sound so profound and still manage not to say anything useful,” Naruto said dryly.

Iruka held his head back, picking his feet off the ground and letting the momentum of the swing carry him forward. “I have my moments.”

“Can I ask you something?”

Iruka placed his feet back on the ground to steady himself. He gave Naruto his full attention. “Always.”

His voice hesitant, Naruto said, “Monday, when you saw Sasuke, did you notice anything different about him? Could you tell there was something—not off, but just…different?”

Iruka shook his head. “Nothing out of the ordinary. However, I don’t know Sasuke as well as you do. He’s not the easiest person to read.”

“No kidding.” There was a slight quirk to Naruto’s mouth. “I don’t think that’s it, though. I can’t really explain it, but it’s like...”

“Is it something you’ve noticed before?”

“Kind of. Remember when Sasuke first started working with you? Looking back, I didn’t understand it at the time, but I saw a little bit of it then, too. It was sometime during the fifth week, actually. That Thursday or Friday, when you left Sasuke alone in a classroom with a bunch of kids because Sakamoto-sensei was sick, and you had to substitute for her on short notice.”

Before Iruka could open his mouth to speak, Naruto held up his hands and waved them in front of his face. “And before you say anything, yeah, I know I wasn’t supposed to be there, but I was going through this stage where I had to make sure Sasuke was _there_. I was really…even though it was already a couple of years since Sasuke came back, and I…

“Kakashi caught me that time, and I’m guessing he didn’t tell you about that one since you’ve never brought it up.”

Iruka made a noise in agreement. “I didn’t know until now.”

“That’s because I asked Kakashi not to tell you. When it came to Sasuke, though, at one point, I practically had to beg Kakashi not to tell Sasuke. But it wasn’t because I was embarrassed of what I was doing. I started watching over Sasuke a long time before that day. And even though we were a little less than friends then, I wasn’t afraid of what his reaction would be if he found out.

“I’ve never told anyone this, but…that day, when I saw Sasuke in that room, doing something so—so unlike the image of Sasuke I already had engraved into my mind, I remember feeling angry. Seeing all those kids looking up to him, treating Sasuke like he hadn’t done anything wrong, and seeing that he didn’t try to push them away, there was this...this _raw_ anger.”

Naruto placed his hands in his lap and began rubbing his palms on the sides of his pants. “Sasuke, who turned off pretty much everyone he met because he couldn’t be bothered to interact with another human being unless he was forced to, could have a likeable personality around these kids he barely knew. But me— _me_ —the person who had been chasing Sasuke for years, the person who had done everything possible to make him stay and the person who had fought anyone who tried to take him away—Sasuke wouldn’t give me a _damn_ minute of his time.”

“Naruto…”

Naruto gave a self-deprecating laugh. “Maybe part of that anger was resentment, too. I felt like I was eleven again. Despite everything Sasuke had done, all the things he put everyone through, put me through, I still got the short end of the stick. On top of Tsunade letting him back in Konoha, being a natural with kids was just another thing on the long list of things Sasuke had going for him that I didn’t. And I could only reason it with the fact that Sasuke was Sasuke. There I was, not even sure I’d be able to manage my own team one day, and there he was, like he’d been taking care of kids his entire life. I didn’t get it then, what you saw in Sasuke that made you think he’d be good with kids.”

At Naruto’s pause, Iruka said, “To be honest, I didn’t think Sasuke would be. Very few people were willing to give him another chance, so I thought that was something I could do. It seemed like the right thing to do.”

“Whatever made you do it, I…thanks.”

“There’s nothing to thank me for.”

“Still…”

“And you’ve never told Sasuke about any of this?”

“I don’t have the nerve to tell him.”

“It’s no secret I’m not exactly supportive of your relationship, but if you still feel that way…”

Naruto placed his hands back in his lap, ignoring the lingering warmth from his palms. “I won’t lie. A small part of me is still holding onto that anger. But after it hit me that day, I stayed to see what would happen because I didn’t know what to do with it. I was looking for a way to make that sudden surge of emotion disappear, an excuse to see Sasuke mess up. I wanted him to yell. I wanted him to make someone cry and maybe even lose his job because of it. And I know it wasn’t fair of me, but I was looking for anything that would show me Sasuke was only pretending to be this person he wasn’t. So, I watched him. I watched him for the rest of the day until all of the kids went home, and when that anger hit me again, you know what the worst part of it was, Iruka-sensei?”

“What was it?”

“When I realised most of that anger stemmed from me having to acknowledge how much I didn’t know about Sasuke.”

“You really do…”

Naruto sighed. “I know I kind of went off there, but yeah, that’s when I first noticed it. Sasuke being somewhere between happy and content, and with Hotaru, the way he looks sometimes, that’s the thing I can’t explain. You wouldn’t be able to tell by looking at Sasuke without really knowing him, but I think after Itachi…”

Naruto stopped to clear his throat. That was something about Sasuke too personal to share, even with someone like Iruka. “I want to say it’s because Sasuke’s happy, but it’s deeper than that. I don’t think it’s selfish of me to say that I already make him happy.”

Scratching the back of his neck, Naruto gave Iruka a sheepish grin. “It’s embarrassing to admit, but when Sasuke’s happy, I’m happy, too. And Sasuke’s happiness—that’s something very…important to me,” he whispered. “Yet lately, he’s...it’s different. But it’s a good kind of different. It’s not like Sasuke and I are married or something conventional like that. And taking care of a kid was the last thing I expected. I’m not saying Hotaru’s our son or anything, but he’s someone we really want to take care of so we can give him the things that were taken away from us.”

“Naruto…”

“Besides, who wouldn’t want another one of me walking around, right?”

“You’d be surprised.” Iruka snorted. “Are you sure that’s not your ego speaking for you?”

Naruto stuck out his tongue, smiling alongside Iruka at the childish gesture. “You haven’t been this mean to me in a while, Iruka-sensei.”

Iruka sighed. “Thank you, Naruto.”

Naruto blinked in surprise. “For what?”

“It makes me happy knowing you still feel comfortable enough to talk about such things with an old man like me.”

“You’re having one of those emotionally maturing revelations?”

“Maybe, but it doesn’t make it any easier to accept. I can’t help but worry when it comes to you,” Iruka said softly.

“I am grateful for that, you know. And I can understand because that’s how I feel about Sasuke. I’ve always worried about Sasuke, and now I have Hotaru, too. But I think…I think whatever happens in the future, it’ll be more than worth it in the end."

Iruka gave a pained smile and gripped Naruto’s shoulder. “I hope it is, Naruto.”


	2. Part Two

The voice was at faint at first, a dull throbbing in the back of Sasuke’s head, and the muddled sound of someone calling his name was no more than a whisper in his mind. Like the feel of tiny fingers brushing against his palm, it tingled. Tingled like the warm air blowing into his ear, the steady breathing disjointed by hastily drawn out syllables, and the small hand pulling on his arm that finally took Sasuke from the vestiges of sleep.

It was Hotaru.

That much Sasuke’s foggy mind could supply, and as tired as he was, Sasuke resigned himself to the inevitable. He knew that he would have to get out of bed eventually in order to take Hotaru to the bathroom, which may or not lead to a trip to the kitchen because Hotaru had cravings in the middle of the night, as well, which, regardless of what Naruto said about it, Sasuke didn’t think he indulged Hotaru in.

Naruto wouldn’t do it. If the snoring Sasuke heard on his left was any indication, Naruto wasn’t going to be waking up anytime soon. Most of the time, waking Naruto wasn’t the problem. It was preventing Naruto from going back to sleep. Sasuke would turn the light on, and Naruto would open his eyes, mumble something incoherent that Sasuke wouldn’t even attempt to interpret, and fall into a semi-conscious state until Sasuke turned the light back off. But tonight, Sasuke really didn’t want to expend energy trying to keep Naruto awake.

Being tired wasn’t a regular occurrence. However, the lethargy Sasuke had been feeling lately was becoming more difficult to combat. It came in sporadic but progressive intervals, beginning the Saturday Hotaru first appeared on the other side of the door, and while Sasuke could push it aside at home, he wasn’t certain what he would do when he didn’t have the opportunity to rest whenever he felt the need to.

So far, the intermittent bouts of exhaustion hadn’t necessarily affected Sasuke to the point where he was incapacitated. He could force himself awake and could withhold from giving into the urge to express his more frequent outbursts of irritation that came as a side effect of being so tired, but it was unrealistic to assume it wouldn’t affect his ability to carry out his upcoming mission in some way. Fainting on his way to deliver a scroll to Kusagakure or disrupting any diplomatic proceedings that were to take place when he arrived there wasn’t the first impression he wanted to make after being reinstated as a ninja.

He pinpointed it on the stress from taking care of Hotaru, coupled with readjusting to his former lifestyle. Apart from the training regime he recently began, he’d spent the majority of the time following his release from house arrest being with Iruka and the kids Iruka taught at the Academy.

Lack of sleep wasn’t the issue. Sleep didn’t seem to be helpful. He wouldn’t refer to himself as an insomniac, but he could get by on a few hours of sleep a day, less than that if necessary, and despite the amount of rest that had replaced most of his former training schedule because his responsibility for Hotaru hadn’t yet allowed for it, the excess sleep wasn’t doing much to make up for the lethargy.

Even Naruto had brought it up, making an offhand comment about Sasuke being tired two days ago. When they were outside, before Naruto and Hotaru went off to chase fireflies, Sasuke had all but fallen asleep on the blanket. Naruto hadn’t said more about it since that Tuesday, but Kakashi said something similar that same night. Though, Kakashi was a discerning person by default and knew Sasuke almost as well as Naruto.

The exchange then hadn’t improved much after Kakashi mentioned knowing more about the scroll than he was willing to tell Sasuke. It deviated even further when Kakashi made a remark about the pronounced bags from beneath Sasuke’s eyes, immediately leaving afterwards and giving Sasuke no time to retaliate.

In general, it was one of the least productive conversations he’d held with Kakashi, undeniably one of the more curt ones, and Sasuke wasn’t looking forward to revisiting the subject when he returned from his mission. Unfortunately, it was the kind of subject Kakashi would be persistent about, and Sasuke was only marginally surprised Kakashi hadn’t come back to house.

“I have to go, Sasuke.”

Without opening his eyes, Sasuke turned his head to the right, to the sound of Hotaru’s voice, and sighed when he felt Hotaru’s hand playing with his hair.

Hotaru called for him again, delving into a litany that consisted solely of Sasuke’s name. Initially, it was jarring to his ears. Yet, his head was becoming heavy, and his body felt as if it was growing heavier with every utterance of his name. Each one sounded louder than the last, but it was when the touch of Hotaru’s fingers was gone that Sasuke opened his eyes.

The incessant chorus of his name followed, waning into nothing. Save for Naruto snoring, it was quiet again.

Sasuke sat up quickly. Grunting at the recoil from the movement, he struggled to stay upright, waiting for the dizziness to subside. He blinked. A negligible amount of light was coming from the window, but it took a few seconds for his pupils to adjust to the dark. The blur of colour dissipating at the edge of his sight, blindly, Sasuke felt around the bed. His hand moved absently, past the empty space between himself and Naruto where Hotaru had been sleeping, and unintentionally hit Naruto in the face.

Unperturbed, Naruto grunted and turned away.

“Na…ruto,” Sasuke tried to say, rubbing his throat at the scratchiness of his voice. It came out as a strained murmur, his next attempt not much different, and it was as if he lost the capability to speak completely.

“…Sasuke.”

Sasuke turned his head sharply at the voice, nearly falling over in the process. He was able to tell that it was coming from somewhere inside the room, but Sasuke couldn’t see Hotaru. He would have felt any movement from beneath the bed, and there wasn’t enough room inside the closet for even someone Hotaru’s size to hide.

“Wh…ere?”

His voice sounded hoarser than before, a wisp of air out of his mouth barely distinguishable, and Sasuke wondered if he wasn’t dreaming. Gradually, he draped his feet over the bed, arms resting over his legs as he took the time to catch his breath.

“Sasuke.”

Sasuke stood cautiously, not wanting to fall as he worked through the haze that was his mind. He tried to trace Hotaru’s voice again. It was coming from outside the room this time, a mellowed sort of yell that sounded as if Hotaru was speaking with his mouth covered.

“I want to show Sasuke something.”

He almost jumped when the door to the bedroom creaked. The noise sharp and deliberate, it cut through the sound of Naruto’s snoring as it opened, and Sasuke noticed the soft light peeking through the bottom. It was too muted to be from the hallway, and Sasuke could only think of the flashlight Naruto had lost a couple of months ago.

He took a tentative step forward, taken aback by how much effort he was making to walk. The clock read a little before one when he stood and read a quarter after two when he was half way from the bed to the door.

“Come on, Sasuke.”

Sasuke reached for the switch in the room, intending to turn on the light to see. Hand nearing the toggle, he staggered through the doorway instead, hissing when he hit the wall in the hallway. The resulting thump resonated throughout the house and was marked pointedly by the soreness in Sasuke’s side. He pressed himself hard against the wall as he tried to keep from falling.

Hearing Hotaru call out his name again, Sasuke choked on the attempt to reply. The light he’d seen beneath the door earlier wasn’t from a flashlight. It coursed down the middle of the floor in the hall, beginning at the bedroom door, a faint and thin stream of light, tinged with yellow that went toward the direction of Hotaru’s voice.

“I’m scared, Sasuke.”

Sasuke grimaced as he placed a hand on the wall in the living room. He knew he was getting closer. He knew he was almost there. He just needed a little more time, a little more—

“Sasuke doesn’t...”

“Hotaru,” Sasuke managed to gasp when he reached the end of the light. It stopped right at Hotaru’s heels, leading to the entryway. Hands clasped behind his back, Hotaru was facing away from Sasuke and standing in the middle of the doorway. The light narrowed, disappeared into nothing, and Sasuke couldn’t prevent the involuntary shudder that escaped him. Cold air was creeping into the house. It wrapped around him, dousing him with sharp pricks on his skin that permeated through his t-shirt and shorts.

But dressed only in his pyjamas, Hotaru didn’t seem bothered by the cold. He turned around slowly, wearing an awkward sort of smile, a wistful expression that was out of place on someone like Hotaru. Even more so by the nearly iridescent quality shrouding Hotaru’s facial features, and Sasuke’s breath hitched when Hotaru extended his hand for Sasuke to take.

“I’m home, Sasuke.”

Sasuke had that funny feeling in the pit of his stomach again, the one that emerged when he first met Hotaru, but it was distorted, a fleeting sensation. He opened his mouth to urge Hotaru to come back inside, but the words were unintelligible even to his own ears, garbled sounds that were no more than babble. He reached to grab Hotaru’s hand, intending to pick him up and pull him away from the door, but small fingers wrapped around Sasuke’s right wrist, tightening around his skin before he had the chance to act.

Stomach lurching, Sasuke bit back a gasp. It was that lethargic feeling. The impact hitting him without warning, and it was as if all his chakra was being drained from him, as if the air was being forcibly removed from him. He hunched over, his eyes painfully wide as he crumpled to the floor.

“Does Sasuke want to know, too?”

Sasuke was panting harshly. Trying to intake as much oxygen as his lungs would allow, his chest heaving up and down, he was barely able to use one hand to prevent himself from sprawling on the floor.

Hotaru tilted his head to the side. Softly, he asked, “Does Sasuke want to know where the fireflies go?”

After a moment of pause, Sasuke felt the grip Hotaru had on his wrist loosening, fingers carefully pulling away until he had completely let go. A jolt went through Sasuke as he gradually regained the ability to move, but when he looked up, Hotaru was gone.

Gritting his teeth, Sasuke clutched his head. His vision was hazy while Hotaru’s words were a clear mantra reverberating in his mind, but it hurt to breathe when his upper body felt so constricted. It hurt to think when there was an insistent throbbing in the back of his head. It hurt to stand on legs that were unsteady because they were numb. It hurt to remember the expression on Hotaru’s face. It hurt to recognise that he didn’t know what was happening, to acknowledge this sudden debilitating fear of knowing that Hotaru was no longer there.

And Sasuke ran.

...

It was the taste of turtle that woke him up.

It was the taste of cotton strands on his tongue along with whatever else plush toys were made of that brought Naruto to a coughing fit because Hotaru’s stuffed animal was apparently trying to choke Naruto in his sleep.

He didn’t know how it got in there. He didn’t want to know why he could feel a black bead that was supposed to pass as one of the thing’s eyes pressing against the back of his front teeth. Kame, as Hotaru had decided to fittingly name the turtle, was just there. Naruto needed it not to be.

Two days after Naruto had bought the toy for Hotaru and he’d already seen it in almost every place he didn’t want to see it. On the kitchen floor, lying under the table and against that little corner he and Sasuke only now started bothering to clean because Hotaru liked playing hide and seek beneath the table where he liked to sit and draw crooked little stars on the underside using the black marker he’d found in Sasuke’s desk.

The stars scribbled beneath the table stayed since they wouldn’t come off no matter how hard Sasuke made Naruto scrub, unlike the ones on the wall in the hallway by the door, which Hotaru tried to justify by saying the wall was already blue. According to the logic of a three year old, drawing thirteen stars (because Hotaru was proud of the fact he could count to thirteen) and a moon on an incredibly visible area that would have made Hotaru’s recreation of the sky at night the focal point of the entire house only made sense. But Naruto took some satisfaction in the fact that Sasuke made Hotaru help him that time, and Naruto taught Hotaru how to count to fourteen when they were forced to clean the pictures off the wall.

The turtle made an appearance then, too. Being held by Hotaru in one hand, Kame was still drenched in the fluid from the bottle of cleaner that trailed down Hotaru’s arm as Hotaru helped Naruto wipe away the traces of black ink that came off with surprising ease.

Naruto had also seen the turtle stuffed in one of Sasuke’s shoes when Hotaru thought it was a good idea to walk around in Naruto’s. That didn’t work out as well as Hotaru probably wanted it to, resulting in Hotaru tripping over his feet and crying for no more than a few seconds before he focused his attention on trying to fit into Naruto’s jacket that almost covered him completely. But it wasn’t until after he and Sasuke caught Hotaru trying to teach the turtle how to swim in the toilet bowl yesterday morning that Sasuke decided to do something about it. Naruto would have done something about it himself if Hotaru wasn’t so hell bent on not letting the turtle out of his sight.

And though Sasuke had assured Naruto that he washed the turtle, Naruto was wary about the effectiveness of washing something without a washing machine. He’d taken the extra care to make sure Kame was positioned on the other side of Hotaru, on the side where Sasuke slept when Hotaru climbed into the bed, even if it wasn’t that much further away from Naruto.

However, apparently, it wasn’t that much of a precaution anyway.

After spitting the turtle out of his mouth, Naruto grabbed it and threw it somewhere on the other side of the room, letting his hand flop onto the bed as soon as he heard the turtle hit the wall with a soft thump. Licking his lips, he tried not to think of all the other places Hotaru’s toy had been. Unfortunately, real or otherwise, the taste was still there. He was sorely tempted to brush his teeth but really didn’t feel like getting up any time soon, never mind opening his eyes since he just woke up.

Not that Naruto needed to open his eyes to notice that he wasn’t the only one awake. He stretched his arm to the side, feeling across the empty space to his right where Hotaru had fallen asleep last night.

It was a given that Hotaru wasn’t in bed. By association, neither was Sasuke. The sheets still felt warm against Naruto’s skin, which meant they’d gotten up only a few minutes ago. The lack of light blaring on his face told him it was still dark outside, and Naruto didn’t even need to look at the clock on the nightstand to know it was probably somewhere around two in the morning. It was better not to look and easier to accept that Hotaru getting up in the middle of the night—morning—was going to be the norm for a while because Hotaru didn’t like going to the bathroom by himself and wanted someone to hold his hand while he peed.

Literally.

Naruto had found out the hard way when Hotaru refused to let it out and silently threatened to urinate on the wall until Naruto grabbed the hand that Hotaru wasn’t using to hold his…

He couldn’t even say it in his mind. Childish of him maybe, but it was more than a little weird considering the only…one Naruto had willingly been that close to, and closer, was Sasuke’s, which was in a purely sexual context. Sasuke’s was an exception, and the desire to go near another guy’s family jewels hadn’t and _wasn’t_ going to come across. But this was different. As awkward as it was, Naruto had been willing to suck it up if only for Hotaru’s sake and made sure he’d washed both of their hands thoroughly afterwards. And although he was glad it was Sasuke’s turn to hold Hotaru’s hand this time, Naruto still felt somewhat uneasy knowing that after tomorrow, he was going to be alone with Hotaru without Sasuke nearby.

There was this idea of togetherness that he had already formulated in his mind, the idea of the three of them being in the beginning stages of becoming something more than just Naruto, Sasuke, and Hotaru, and Naruto was reluctant at the thought of this pause in their relationship, even if it was only temporarily.

Of course, they’d already talked to Hotaru about Sasuke’s mission. They couldn’t _not_ talk to him about it, and Naruto wasn’t sure if Hotaru fully comprehended the meaning behind the words Sasuke and leaving, but he was surprisingly understanding about the fact that Sasuke was not going to be here. And considering how Hotaru still clung to Sasuke, although it wasn’t a bad as it was those first two days, Hotaru being understanding was an understatement. He just smiled a little, decidedly more calm about the situation than either Naruto or Sasuke expected Hotaru to be, and was satisfied with Naruto’s explanation of the inner workings of a society of ninja and the importance of delivering a secret scroll only Sasuke could read.

Hotaru had summed it up with a slow raise of his head and an exaggerated expression of awe on his face when he figured out how many days were in a week. But, completely ignoring Naruto’s attempts to explain and Hotaru’s revelation that a week was the same as seven days that overwhelmed the seriousness of the conversation, as long as Sasuke promised to see Hotaru before he left, Hotaru took it pretty well.

Still, Naruto wasn’t looking forward to the moment when Sasuke being gone for a definite amount of time finally sank in for Hotaru. Being solely responsible for Hotaru for an entire week was kind of more than a little daunting. Sasuke was the one who was good with kids, the one who had the patience for this kind of thing, and those initial apprehensions about taking care of Hotaru were coming back when Naruto realised Hotaru wouldn’t be the only one affected by Sasuke’s absence.

Catering to Hotaru in the middle of the night, for example, was something that was alternated between the two of them. Sometimes, using the bathroom extended to having a snack, and he and Sasuke had already established some semblance of a routine to ensure at least one of them was able to sleep through the night. Although it was more for Sasuke’s sake than Naruto’s since Naruto was selective in his sleeping habits.

He was neither a light nor heavy sleeper, falling somewhere in between depending on nothing in particular, and it aggravated Sasuke that Naruto could be sensitive to the slightest noise some nights and be dead to the world every now and then. So much that the standard nudging, pinching, kicking and love taps that were more like punches to Naruto’s shoulder would range from Naruto waking in time to catch Sasuke’s hand or foot from making contact with one of Naruto’s body parts to Naruto being completely oblivious to the fact that Sasuke was trying to get his attention.

Once, two months after they’d moved in together, Naruto had woken up on the floor. Sasuke admitted to pushing him off the bed because Naruto wouldn’t wake up, and when even that didn’t work, Sasuke resorted to turning on the light, which was actually more effective than the other attempts short of using excessive force.

And it wasn’t the light from the lamp, either. It was the room light, right above their bed, and no matter how many times Sasuke tried to deny it, Naruto knew Sasuke had recently been buying a higher wattage in light bulbs thinking Naruto wouldn’t notice. Because the light had an odd effect on Naruto, like a persistent itch that burned through his eyelids that wouldn’t leave him alone until he forced himself awake. It was that vindictive part of Sasuke’s personality that reasoned Naruto wouldn’t get any sleep if Sasuke couldn’t. Now, Naruto was building a resistance to it for the most part, but ever since that fateful night when Sasuke discovered how light could influence Naruto’s ability to sleep well, Sasuke always turned it on whenever he woke up before Naruto.

The only exception was that first night they had Hotaru, which Naruto had slept through, when Sasuke had been tired enough to fall right back asleep the next morning, even after Naruto’s continuous prodding and poking and failed attempts to persuade Sasuke about the relevance of the homecoming sex that Hotaru’s presence prevented from happening, but usually—

With a start, Naruto opened his eyes.

He was the only one in bed, but the light wasn’t on.

Sasuke was a creature of habit. In all honestly, Naruto believed doing things like that was more of a subconscious effort on Sasuke’s part to make up for all the instability in his life when Sasuke was younger than Sasuke actually being so vindictive. Naruto only joked about it because he knew why Sasuke took it so seriously. It wasn’t just an attempt to wake Naruto up, and the deeper meaning to why Sasuke left the light on for Naruto before leaving the room wasn’t something that went unnoticed.

It was a habit nearly two years in the making. The mere fact the light was off while Sasuke wasn’t in the room didn’t sit well, and Naruto instinctively knew something was wrong.

He detangled himself from the sheets and fell out of the bed with a loud thud. Ignoring the slight pain in his wrist, he cursed as he picked himself up, stumbling over his feet before rushing out of the door and into the hallway.

He turned on the light in the room, flipped the switch in the hall, tried to squash those doubts he managed to put aside that were starting to resurface—the reality that Hotaru wasn’t really theirs, that he and Sasuke had taken Hotaru in without so much as a second thought to the consequences simply because Hotaru had nowhere else to go. They didn’t know where Hotaru came from, why he was even here, but everything seemed fine. Everything was fine, and for a moment, it was okay to forget the peculiars of the situation. It was okay to let Hotaru into their lives and let the consequences fall to the wayside.

But the bathroom was empty. Hotaru’s room was empty, and for the sixth time, Naruto told himself that he wasn’t going to panic. It wasn’t like he and Sasuke ruled out the possibility of an ulterior motive to Hotaru being here. If anything, they acknowledged that Hotaru’s sudden appearance was suspicious, and even though they weren’t the only ones who were swayed to think of Hotaru as the kid who happened to look like Naruto, they still should have known better.

And it ate at Naruto that he wasn’t prepared because there was no way that Sasuke would have left voluntarily. Naruto had made sure to give Sasuke more than enough reason to stay. Either whatever was behind Hotaru’s showing up in front of their house had something to do with Sasuke’s disappearance or someone was using Hotaru as leverage against Sasuke.

Those were the most plausible scenarios in Naruto’s mind. Why he wasn’t involved, Naruto didn’t know, but by the time he got to the kitchen, all the lights in the house were on, and Naruto was no closer to finding Sasuke and Hotaru. There was nothing to say that Sasuke and Hotaru had been taken away. No sudden spike of chakra, familiar or otherwise, that Naruto would have noticed regardless of how he was sleeping, and the fact that he couldn’t pick up on Sasuke’s only fed into his growing sense of paranoia.

Naruto backtracked, head peering into the entryway area that was normally hidden from view from the rest of the house. There was a light hitting the wall, near the corner by the threshold of the front door that Naruto realised wasn’t coming from the bulb in the hallway.

Softly, he said Sasuke’s name, his voice loud in the small house that suddenly seemed so much bigger, and shouted for Hotaru with the knowledge that neither would answer him.

The front door was wide open, and Sasuke’s shoes were still by the wall, stacked neatly right next to Hotaru’s smaller ones. Sasuke wouldn’t go outside without wearing any shoes. Sometimes, he liked to gripe to Naruto about his feet getting dirty, occasionally making funny faces at the feel of anything between his toes despite the kind of sandals ninja wore, and as much as Naruto liked to tease him for it, there was nothing remotely funny about knowing Sasuke was without them.

His mind was racing. There were too many what-if scenarios to shift through, and the air that hit his face when he ran out the door was a cold reminder that any one of them was possible.

They lived on the edge of Konoha, close enough to the boundaries of Fire Country, and damn it if this wasn’t the one instance Naruto wished he’d taken Iruka’s advice to live closer to the village. He didn’t know long how the door had been open. Dawn wouldn’t be for a few more hours, and time was a factor that wasn’t on Naruto’s side, but—

There it was. A slight tingle, it was a flicker of something familiar hitting Naruto the instant he stepped outside of the house.

It was Sasuke’s chakra, weak and growing increasingly fainter. It didn’t do much to reassure Naruto about Sasuke’s state of being, but it meant something that he could at least pick up on Sasuke. It meant something that Sasuke wasn’t too far away. Yet it was comparatively more assuring when it was Hotaru’s chakra, what little Hotaru had, that Naruto couldn’t feel at all.

Following the pull of Sasuke’s chakra, Naruto ran around the side of the house, heading toward the dense patch of forest.

A sharp rock was ledged in the bottom of his foot, embedding itself in his skin. Naruto hissed at the pain and almost lost his balance when he nearly tripped on another rock. The grass was still slippery in the morning, and while he knew it would have been more practical if he’d taken the time to put on his sandals before he rushed out the door, he didn’t have the luxury to be in the practical kind of mood.

He picked up speed as he travelled deeper in the forest, catching a glimpse of someone up ahead. It was vague at first, a shape Naruto could barely make out, but he didn’t need to see clearly to know who it was.

Getting closer, he called out Sasuke’s name, anticipating a response that didn’t come. His voice echoed into the woods. It was a desperate sound that faded into nothing, stringing Naruto along as he jumped from branch to branch.

Further up below, he could see Sasuke standing in the middle of a large clearing, and Naruto landed on the ground right before reaching the open space.

He started running as soon as his feet touched the dirt, a snarl in the back of his throat that formulated into Sasuke’s name. But he couldn’t run fast enough, couldn’t get to Sasuke quick enough. The more he ran, the longer it was taking to get to Sasuke, and the small gap between them was as agonising as the distance that had separated them five years ago.

Because those five seconds it took to reach Sasuke felt like five years, but when he stopped just short of running into Sasuke’s back, the little relief Naruto expected to feel at finding that at least Sasuke was okay wasn’t there.

At first glance, Sasuke did seem okay. Although he was standing still, Sasuke didn’t look hurt, but when Naruto narrowed his eyes, he noticed that something was off. He didn’t know what to call it. There was Sasuke, and there was this yellowish light. Dim to the point of being nonexistent but still visible because it was dark outside. It enveloped Sasuke, like an outline of some unnatural glow around Sasuke’s body, and then it disappeared. Unsure of what to do, Naruto watched as the light dispersed into a cluster of tiny lights. They wavered in front of him and scattered into the forest, fading away in the time it took Naruto to blink.

Hesitantly, he extended his arm toward Sasuke. He was almost afraid to touch him, almost afraid that Sasuke would disappear like that light, and wanted nothing more than for Sasuke to turn around and tell him that nothing was wrong. For Sasuke to look at Naruto with one of those knowing smirks and say that it was all some joke Sasuke and Hotaru were playing on him.

Letting his arm fall back to his side, he whispered Sasuke’s name from under his breath, still unable to come to terms with what he’d just seen. Thinking Sasuke didn’t hear him, even if they weren’t really that far apart, louder, Naruto said, "Where’s Hotaru, Sasuke?"

When Sasuke remained quiet, he tried again, and when Sasuke didn’t answer for the third time, Naruto growled. He pushed aside his momentary fear of touching Sasuke and the blatant disbelief about the light around Sasuke’s body that he couldn’t explain. He grabbed Sasuke, turning him around with a terse jerk. Somewhat because Sasuke was ignoring him but mostly because Hotaru wasn’t with Sasuke, and since Sasuke was his best chance of figuring out why Hotaru was missing, Naruto couldn’t afford not to know what happened. Neither of them could.

Assuming the worst, that someone had taken Hotaru, they had a small window of opportunity to catch up with whoever took Hotaru. The earlier Naruto knew what was going on, the faster he could try to make things right. He needed Sasuke to snap out of whatever trance he was in, and if it took Sasuke yelling at him because Naruto had to knock some sense back into him, Naruto was fine with that.

But Sasuke didn’t lash out at him like Naruto was expecting him to, like Sasuke did whenever Naruto was right about something and Sasuke refused to admit he was wrong, and the scowl on Naruto’s face was gone as soon as Naruto took in Sasuke’s appearance.

Sasuke looked too pale, sickly with his hair matted over his forehead and wet spots on his t-shirt sticking to his skin. But it was Sasuke’s eyes that caught Naruto’s attention, eerily vacant and not focused on anything. He gaze was directed past Naruto, as if Naruto wasn’t even there, and it scared Naruto to see that empty of an expression on Sasuke’s face.

He wanted to say Sasuke was in shock, but it was more like Sasuke was devoid of any sense of being. The only reason Naruto thought otherwise was because while Sasuke’s gaze was blank, his body was trembling. On the verge of collapsing, Sasuke was barely able to hold himself up. Despite how cold it was outside, there were beads of sweat forming down the side of Sasuke’s face. He was shivering, too, taking a tentative step back, away from Naruto, and Naruto felt his knees hit the ground before he saw Sasuke’s legs buckle beneath him.

Sasuke slumped on top of Naruto, his head falling on Naruto’s shoulder as Naruto repositioned himself to accommodate the sudden deadweight. Sasuke felt hot in his arms. Whatever was bare felt clammy, and the sweat that passed through his drenched t-shirt was leaving a damp residue on Naruto’s skin.

Naruto swallowed hard, heart hammering in his chest, and tried not to think of what could have happened in the time he’d been separated from Sasuke and Hotaru and why he hadn’t been there to stop it.

Softly, Naruto whispered Sasuke’s name. He gripped Sasuke’s sides a little tighter when the sound of Sasuke’s harsh breathing was the only response, a painful sounding noise that Naruto could feel against his chest.

“Stay with me, Sasuke.” Naruto took a long and shaky breath. “I need you to tell me what happened, okay?”

He raised his head, searching around frantically for any sign of Hotaru, but couldn’t see anything past the tall trees that surrounded them. Naruto wasn’t the best at tracking chakra. Though, there wasn’t even a trace to follow. It was like Hotaru was never there, but he wasn’t going to think about what the implications of that meant. An abrupt cut-off to the flow of Hotaru’s charka…no, Naruto would have picked up on something like that. Hotaru was still out there, somewhere, but Naruto didn’t want to leave Sasuke by himself. Not like this—

_Stupid_ , he was so stupid.

Pulling Sasuke closer, Naruto rested his arms against Sasuke’s back. He let his fingers perform the familiar motions of the jutsu that was second nature. Telling himself that the slight quivering of his hands as he rushed through the movements was because Sasuke was still shaking, Naruto created enough shadow clones to cover the span of two kilometres in a few minutes.

“Come on, Sasuke. Don’t do this to me, now.”

Sasuke started to mumble something into Naruto’s shoulder, a series of words Naruto couldn’t make out. He repositioned Sasuke in front of him, holding him at arm’s length to keep Sasuke from sagging against him so he could understand what Sasuke was saying the next time he spoke.

“I need you to stay with me." Naruto patted the side of Sasuke’s face, trying to grab his attention. “Because you have to tell me what happened to you and Hotaru, all right?”

Sasuke moaned and would have fallen if Naruto wasn’t holding him upright. He blinked, his eyes wide for a moment, and Naruto could read the signs of recognition on his face.

“Naru…” Sasuke’s voice was scratchy, like he hadn’t used it in a while, but anything was better than that daze he was in earlier.

Naruto sighed, giving into a feeling that was somewhat close to relief, but then Sasuke’s eyes lost focus again. He was staring at Naruto with that vacant gaze.

“No— _no_ , don’t do this to me. You can’t do this to me, Sasuke.” Fingers squeezing hard at Sasuke’s sides, Naruto began to shake him. Desperate to get Sasuke to say something, he shook Sasuke hard enough to wake him and then some, but he could only watch as Sasuke’s eyes rolled to the back of his head.

“Sasuke!

...

There was nothing special about it. More of a faded grey rather than its original black colour, the heavily worn bag didn’t cover the expanse of Sasuke’s back like it seemed to when he was twelve. It wasn’t so small that he could carry it comfortably in one hand, but, bearing in mind Sasuke didn’t have a chance to replenish anything when he arrived in Kusagakure, the bag was a substantial size to carry everything he needed for the next week.

It was an already sparse selection Sasuke had narrowed even further, compelled to unpack and then repack. Again and again, he repeated the process and drowned himself in the motions, fastidious in the arrangement of the items he had placed on the desk and then placed back inside of the bag. It wasn’t until several minutes later, when he noticed the slight trembling of his hands, that Sasuke was able to admit to himself how fruitless his attempt at distraction had been.

Naruto had watched him last night, silent but visibly hard pressed to swallow a retort at the unusually meticulous display, and it left Sasuke with a strange sense of anticipation that carried over into the next morning.

It was three, soon to be four, and while Sasuke had ignored Naruto’s gaze then, he couldn’t ignore his own misgivings about the symbolism of a bag that was far from worth mulling over. It may have been better than the alternative, but there was nothing particularly significant about the bag, nothing that justified how much Sasuke was allowing it to occupy his thoughts. Not in the way it sagged on the desk where he left it, propped against the wall and placed next to the dark green lamp more than twice its size. There wasn’t anything spectacular about the areas of varied discolouration and the seams of the right strap that were beginning to show signs of fraying.

But despite obvious wear, the bag was still practical in the sense that Sasuke told himself he didn’t need to replace it with another one. It held enough non-perishable food to last for a little over a week, maybe two weeks if circumstances called for it. Spare kunai and shuriken were beneath a hidden flap on the underside of the bag, above the small opening that held in place a small refillable bottle for water. There was a sealed white envelope, as well. Tsunade’s calligraphy sprawled the front of the envelope, large characters in black ink unexpectedly neat and arranged in a vertical column that preceded the red seal of the Hokage, and inside was a folded piece of paper that affirmed Sasuke as a delegate of Konoha and permitted him to enter Kusagakure.

However, ultimately, Sasuke decided, that was all it held.

A bag couldn’t carry elusive things like the myriad of memories Sasuke hadn’t quite forgotten. Those decisions made once upon a time, they were ones that continued to leer at him and lingered like a shadow—swallowing whole any opportunity of personal redemption and bringing to the surface a struggle between moments of uncertainty and regret that was becoming increasingly more difficult to overcome.

It was a bag, not some projected manifestation of whatever emotional turmoil Sasuke was taking the trouble to ignore. He refused to contend with the idea that his past actions were the cause as to why he had spent what little hours sleeping in a bed that made him feel entirely too small and why Naruto had been so adamant about spending as much time away from Sasuke as he could.

Furthermore, Sasuke hadn’t thought of much of the bag until recently. It was something brought to his attention a couple of months ago, on the day he and Naruto moved in together only because Naruto was a forgetful idiot and not a sentimental fool who couldn’t let go of the box he’d made with Sasuke’s name hastily scribbled on the top—the small one once kept in Naruto’s old apartment, buried beneath a mound of clean clothes Naruto would stuff into his closet after doing laundry.

The cardboard box Naruto had dredged up weeks ago, when Sasuke was officially reinstated as a ninja, was the same box Hotaru had found while crawling under the bed, trying to hide from a Naruto bent on tickling Hotaru into submission. The thought almost brought a smile to his face, the sound of Hotaru’s giggles echoed in Naruto’s own laughter, the night before Hotaru…

Sasuke stepped out of the shower, tying a towel around his waist and placing a smaller one of top of his head. Suppressing a shudder at the feel of cool air hitting his skin, he walked across the hall into the bedroom, purposely averting his eyes away from the bag on the desk as he moved to get dressed.

There had been a kind of trepidation the moment he woke up, growing within him like a less than subtle nudge in the wrong direction. The act of putting on a shirt became stifling. Pants in a size normally loose around his frame were too confining. Pulling his arms through the sleeves of a newly issued vest was almost an act of forced resignation. But maybe, if Sasuke thought of himself as the type of person to consider such things, it was the nearly imperceptible weight of the scroll hidden in his right pocket—resting innocuously against his chest—that made him feel the most uncomfortable.

Taking a seat on the bed, Sasuke reached for the forehead protector lying on the nightstand. He let his fingers trace the smooth surface of the metal, watching them move on their own accord as if they were searching for the lines of an unseen fracture, running along the emblem at the centre of the plate.

This was what he’d been waiting for. This was what five years of ignominy and penance disguised as coerced introspection had accumulated to. This was his opportunity to obtain acceptance from Konoha, to receive readmission into the village that had both commended and condemned him.

But as conflicted as he had been when Tsunade placed the forehead protector in his hands, he couldn’t be bothered to give a damn about it now.

Shoulders slumping, Sasuke glanced at the clock. It read a quarter after four, allowing a little more than an hour until he was supposed to meet Tsunade. He opted to leave for Kusagakure as soon as possible, a decision met with disagreement from Naruto, who had all but said he wanted Sasuke to do otherwise and at least postpone the mission for a day or two. While he both expected and appreciated Naruto’s concern for his welfare, Sasuke didn’t need someone to coddle him. Naruto may not have agreed with his way of coping, but Sasuke more than welcomed the chance to focus his mind elsewhere.

It wasn’t as if Naruto was doing any better, either. He slept worse than Sasuke last night, not at all, and it was incredibly hypocritical of Naruto to criticise him for wanting to leave when Naruto was the one who had initially pushed Sasuke away. Whereas Sasuke managed some semblance of sleep, even if only for a few hours, Naruto couldn’t even manage eye contact with him, much less manage to subject himself to being in the same room as Sasuke. Naruto was doing everything possible to keep himself awake and even more to avoid him.

Though, Sasuke didn’t think Naruto somehow believed him to be at fault. More than likely, Naruto had setup himself up to take responsibility. He was resolved to fix the matter as much as Sasuke was endeavoured to dismiss the futility of it, far from able to overlook his own feelings of culpability. It placed them at an odd sort of impasse. Acknowledging Hotaru’s disappearance and accepting the fact that Hotaru wasn’t coming back were two different things, and each served in the wedge being gradually driven between them.

But as far as why he believed Hotaru wasn’t coming back, Sasuke couldn’t explain it. Prior to the six hours he had been unconscious yesterday, prior to when Naruto had found him in a near catatonic state, there was a considerable gap in his memory.

Yet, after regaining consciousness, Sasuke had instinctively known something was wrong. He vaguely recalled chasing after Hotaru in the dark, leaving Naruto in the bed without turning on the light, the distinct feeling of _cold_ permeating his skin, the prickling sensation of grass beneath his bare feet—the slight, intermittent pain stemming from the bruise in the shape of small fingers that lingered on his left wrist. However, it was muddled. It was an obscure compilation of blurred and fragmented imagery. Making little sense, it was as if he were attempting to weave together remnants of various dreams, but it was the only thing Sasuke had only been certain of when he woke up in bed without either Hotaru or Naruto beside him.

He knew.

He didn’t want to believe it, but somehow Sasuke knew.

He knew as well as he had recognised the shadowed figure in the corner, alarmingly quiet and sagging uncharacteristically in the chair taken from the desk, Kakashi, whose head turned slowly when Sasuke began to exert himself through the strenuous act sitting up had become. He simply sat there and watched as Sasuke fought against the palpitations that had ultimately wrenched him back down.

He knew before he saw Kakashi’s face. Before he saw the misplaced sympathy, the kind of blatant concern Sasuke neither wanted nor needed that was all the more deplorable to receive from someone like his former mentor.

But Kakashi hadn’t said a word when Sasuke eventually managed to remove himself from the bed and staggered across the floor. Kakashi’s gaze remained shrewd, unwavering as Sasuke continued to make uneven strides toward the door. Each step had been more excruciating than the last, so much more than the first. But it was considerably less painful than the ominous feeling in his chest and the susceptible part of him that simply knew Hotaru was gone.

It was a cruel revelation, made crueller still since Sasuke couldn’t find it within himself to question it.

Only as Sasuke reached the threshold did Kakashi find it within himself to speak. To say Naruto was already out there looking for Hotaru, that he wasn’t searching alone, and in spite of his earlier certainty, Sasuke had clenched his teeth and grasped at the obstinate need to prove himself wrong. The words compelled him to run. Fuelled a surge of adrenaline and Sasuke was led to chase a demented sense of déjà vu that sent him sprinting out of the house.

But it was near the edge of the forest where he fell, and it was on his hands and knees, blades of grass lodged between fingers hollowing through the dirt, that Naruto found him.

Minutes had passed after he stumbled across a wide clearing, possibly only a few seconds before Sasuke heard someone call his name. His head whipped violently toward the direction of the voice, breath caught in his throat at the sight of blond hair in the distance, and for a fleeting moment Sasuke had allowed himself to think it was Hotaru. 

The call of his name again, the abrupt and crushing familiarity of the person kneeling in front of him, and Sasuke couldn’t help the overwhelming feeling of disappointment and guilt following the realisation that it was Naruto.

Fingers pressing hard into his shoulders, larger than the bruising wrapped around his wrist, Sasuke fought to push them away, but Naruto wouldn’t let go. Naruto’s grip became tighter and encompassing, frantic and desperate like the sound of his voice, and only then had Sasuke become aware that Naruto was yelling. Yelling at Sasuke for not staying in the house, yelling reasons why Kakashi shouldn’t have let Sasuke come outside alone, yelling that Sasuke should stop being so reckless and stop trying to scare Naruto so much, yet Sasuke could only stare at him. He quieted Naruto with one look, posing a silent question that made Naruto falter in his tirade.

The hands had fallen from Sasuke’s shoulders, Naruto pulling away from him reluctantly, and Sasuke let Naruto’s lack of response wash over him.

A shadow fell over his eyes as Naruto turned his head away. He stood on wobbly legs and balled his hands into fists at his sides, pointedly making an effort not to look at Sasuke. But Sasuke couldn’t look away from Naruto. He found it difficult to tear his eyes away. Immobile, he could only watch, struggling not to shatter a feigned mentality of indifference when Naruto’s body began to tremble.

Because Naruto had been shaking in the same manner that Sasuke hadn’t then, not unlike the way Sasuke’s hand wasn’t shaking as he reached for the bag lying on the desk. Because there wasn’t a noticeable hesitation before Sasuke felt the strap slipping in between his fingers. Because disregarding the nearly indiscernible weight over his shoulder, it was easier for Sasuke to deem nothing special about the worn and faded bag that was no more than a means to an end.

...

Many, many years ago, in a village built near the fringes of a once grand forest, there lived a little boy named Setsu. He was a lonely child, shunned by his mother and father for being the son neither had desired and chastised by the majority of the village for believing in the stories of demons his grandmother would relay in his ear. As a result, Setsu would rarely engage in conversation with anyone other than his grandmother and was considered an outsider among the people in the village. However, Setsu was also a curious child, and it was his innate sense of curiosity that allowed him to seek refuge in his fascination with the demons of old lore. He relished in the vivid depictions of the creatures horrid and more devious than the mind was able to conceive, of the demons once called Oni that came to be long before the ways of shinobi and when little of the world was known.

But during a much simpler period, demons were not always so, his grandmother would say when she first began to share with Setsu accounts of her own childhood. They had been no more evil than humans were good. Although not completely harmless, demons were, at most, truly mischievous beings. Wandering since the beginning of time, they were ancient roamers of the land. Holding a steadfast and ever growing interest for the world around them, they were beings notoriously cunning and too proud to hold themselves culpable for their actions.

As Setsu was initially surprised to learn, demons had even walked peaceably amongst humans, and it was in their very village where the first relationship between demons and humans originated. The tale preceded the birth of his grandmother as well as her parents and grandparents before her.

It began during an era where demons were only known as the Oni. One day, Sankoku, a powerful Oni almost as old as time itself, stumbled across a small gathering on the outskirts of a magnificent forest. From a distance, the gathering appeared to be composed of Oni not dissimilar to Sankoku himself. Dark hair trailed the lengths of their backs, beneath which were long stretches of embroidered fabric intricately draped over pale bodies, halting above their ankles. They wore on their feet wooden sandals, clacking upon the ground as the creatures scurried near the edge of the forest, and making small indents in the soil. A bemused Sankoku noted, however, they bore no horns. Neither did they conceal their faces with masks as most Oni were wont to do to signify who they were. So intrigued was he by the emergence of these strange new inhabitants, Sankoku had been keen to meet them.

They introduced themselves as Ningen. Upon closer inspection, Sankoku had discovered them to be peculiar, small creatures with ashen skin and narrow faces gaunt as a consequence of malnourishment. At their tallest, they stood no higher than Sankoku’s shoulder. They cowered at Sankoku’s stature but were in turn held in awe by his presence. They pointed with grubby fingers at the sight of Sankoku’s mask and to the three horns protruding from the top of Sankoku’s head. Taking delight in the eagerness of these bright creatures, in the vulnerability in eyes filled with wonder, Sankoku enveloped them into his bosom as a mother would a young child distrustful of the world around him.

With Sankoku’s influence, in time, the Oni and Ningen had come to live alike in harmony, sharing a land that flourished with life and offered plentiful bounty for many years to come. His grandmother spoke of these memories fondly, and Setsu listened in rapture to the imagery of the enormous trees from which sprouted large canopies of leaves that offered shelter to any wanderer seeking solace from the harsh rays of the sun, wholly unlike the now diminished forest that appeared far too aged and withered for having such grand trees that his grandmother said had been as lush and green as his mother’s hair was thick and black.

Setsu loved to marvel at her description of the colourful assortment of fruits that remained ripe year round. Soft flesh spilling the sweetest of juices that dribbled down her chin, the image was far more pleasant than the dwindling supply of stale rice that did little to combat the onset of famine in the village. Water, too, was becoming scarce in the village, but Setsu preferred to indulge in his grandmother’s flowing streams, share in her visions of water so clear she was able to see her reflection in it—water to play in freely, water to savour and drink that had not been sparsely collected from a drying well.

Yet, his grandmother would also recall her youth with resentment in her voice, not besieged by the smile she favoured to bestow upon Setsu. The time of prosperity she had experienced would later become overshadowed by a collective fear within the village.

A small group of villagers known as humans had grown distrustful of the Oni and segregated themselves from the beings that hid their true nature beneath their masks and their horns. They believed the Oni had long ruled the Ningen under the guise of trust, compelling the Ningen to submit to their perverse methods of the Oni by exploiting strange features that bore no other purpose than to frighten. In the beginning, few in the village gave notice to such nonsensical claims, but the seed of prejudice had already been sown and quickly took root. It spread like wildfire, brewing amid the villagers and severing their relationship with the Oni who had taught the Ningen the ways of world but so many years ago foreign to them.

The fear soon became all consuming, a terrifying hate incited by stories of horrendous deeds no Oni had done. But many of the Oni gradually withered into lowly creatures, beings bitter and malevolent that came to embody that which the humans despised. Thereafter, these Oni had become what the humans referred to as demons. Soon, the hostility between humans and demons became encompassing and nearly destroyed the village. In a final effort, armed with crude weapons of their own making, the humans drove the demons out, and the once proud and ancient clan of Oni had fled into the sanctuary of the neighbouring forest. 

But the absence of demons had accomplished little in quelling the fear of the people. It continued to fester and was the subject of paranoia. The elders declared the forest forbidden, threatening to banish from the village those who entered. Any demon seen near or within the village was ordered to be killed on sight, as was anyone who was or rumoured to be associated with them. To even speak of the demons was an offense punishable by death.

Over time, knowledge of the demons that had once walked amongst the villagers lingered only in hushed tones and developed into myths delivered by hearsay. The truth hidden in forgotten lore, whispers of the existence of demons had merely become tales told at night to scare disobeying children who would not fall asleep.

The tale of the origins of his village was only one of many Setsu was able to recite by memory, one of his favourites to listen to, and a tale his grandmother loved to tell. However, one week before Setsu’s twelfth birthday would be the last time he would hear of it from her. The following day, his grandmother took ill.

She was his father’s grandmother, a wizened old woman who had seen far too many summers for Setsu to count.

“Her death will come slowly,” the village healer said, “an appropriate torment to suffice for her being greedy with her many years of life.” But at the healer’s words, Setsu caught the impish gleam in his grandmother’s eyes, beneath which lay a foreboding secret Setsu knew she would carry to her grave.

On the eve of Setsu’s twelfth birthday, Setsu watched his grandmother clash with death. It was a vision burned into Setsu’s mind, the scene of her gasping for precious air, each breath taking her closer to her passing, and in his distress, Setsu went to his parents for counsel.

“There is but one medicine which can save her,” his mother said, “a yellow moss that grows on the trunks of the trees in the forest you are forbidden to enter. If you love your grandmother so, you shall tie a piece of cloth over your eyes and allow your father lead you into the forest.”

On the day Setsu became one year older than eleven, Setsu set foot outside of the village with a tattered piece of fabric tied securely over his eyes as his father led him into the forest. When the cloth was removed, his father was gone, and in his place stood one of the Oni, a creature at least twice his height that Setsu had previously only envisioned from the stories of his grandmother.

A mask the colour of blood adorned the Oni’s face, and three horns protruded from the top of his head. The horns were small, rimmed with gold and curled inward to form sharp points.

“Well met, young Ningen,” the Oni said. Moving one hand behind his back and placing the other lightly on top of his abdomen, he gave a small bow to Setsu without breaking eye contact.

Remembering the warning his grandmother had instilled into him, Setsu carefully emulated the movement.

“Fear what the Oni can do, Setsu,” his grandmother had said, “but do not fear the Oni themselves for they are quick to latch onto fears of others and will take advantage of this. They may take heed of your plight but expect no more. Their cunning is only bested by their inquisitive nature. When you cross paths with one of the Oni, make haste to show respect for they are well-versed in the conventions of tradition.”

Setsu held the Oni’s gaze as the Oni continued to appraise him with caution. “Well met, Sankoku of the Oni.”

“How rare to chance upon one who recognises me.” Sankoku lifted his head slowly and folded his arms within the sleeves of his garment. “I am honoured, but to satiate this old soul, tell me what ails you, he who is descended from those whom my kind once called friend. What brings you to the forest deemed forbidden to you many of your generations ago?”

“My name is Setsu, and I am lost within your illustrious forest. I live in the village near the outskirts of your home and humbly ask for your aid in returning. I came with my father seeking a remedy for my grandmother, yet my father is gone, and I do not know the path home.”

“Is this all you truly seek, young Setsu?”

Setsu nodded. “No more.”

“Such a simple request shall be swiftly granted. However, in turn, I insist upon a favour of you.”

“And the favour you ask of me?”

“As of now, I have no intention of disclosing my request. It shall be only upon your successful return to the village that I make my claim.”

Setsu weighed the ambiguous words with uncertainty. He knew declining such rare generosity would yield no immediate harm. He would be left to wander the maze of the forest of which he knew very little and perhaps with no likelihood of escape, yet Setsu’s desire to cure his ailing grandmother prevailed over his resistance to trust in the Oni called Sankoku.

“For what you will have of me, I accept,” Setsu said.

“Very well.”

Sankoku removed his hands from his sleeves and slowly dislodged his mask. Black hair fell loosely over his shoulders as he exposed a smooth face with prominent features and dark blue eyes that held.

Sankoku extend the mask to Setsu, and Setsu gasped when it began to emit a white light. It disappeared from view and Sankoku’s hand now held a small jar. A white cloth covered the top and was secured by a piece of string tied around the neck of the jar. 

“If you are able to lure a firefly and contain it in this jar,” Sankoku said, “it will permit you safe passage in my forest. However, only if you are able to preserve a firefly in this jar through the falling of the moon and the rising of the sun in seven days time, will this offering aid you in your return to your village.”

His only hope in returning home through this demon, Setsu expressed his understanding with a nod of his head and accepted the jar from Sankoku with both hands. 

“Naruto…?” 

Not startled, Naruto covered a yawn with the side of his arm and turned at the sound of Sasuke’s voice. It’d been a while since anyone had been able to sneak up on him, Sasuke included, and there were worse things Sasuke could do that more than made up for it. But those were the kinds of things he preferred not to think about.

Naruto leaned further against the armrest of the couch. From the corner of his eye, he caught Sasuke glancing to the empty mug on the coffee table, eyes wandering to the green notebook in Naruto’s hand, and Naruto let out a sigh when he saw Sasuke stiffen by one of the armchairs.

“Sasuke…”

“What do you think you’re doing?”

It wasn’t as much of a question as it was a statement that heavily implied Naruto was doing something wrong, but Naruto couldn’t bring himself to respond with more than a careless shrug of his shoulders. Spending however many hours reading Sasuke’s notes on the scroll he wasn’t supposed to read obviously had a lot to do with the increasing annoyance on Sasuke’s face. And it wasn’t like Naruto was trying to hide what he was doing, either. He didn’t have the energy to do so when, after all the time he’d put into trying to make sense of the thing, he was left with more questions than he started with.

Against his better judgement, Naruto had tried to go over the actual scroll while Sasuke was sleeping. However, it was blank when he opened it. Some kind of preventive measure maybe, but he made the transition easily enough into the notes Sasuke had written that Sasuke had placed on top of the desk in their room, where Naruto couldn’t help but notice it. They were the closest thing to the scroll he was going to get aside from asking Sasuke directly. Skimming over the obscure characters he didn’t recognise Sasuke had written in the margins, Naruto could tell he wouldn’t have been able to read the scroll anyway. But he figured having no permission to read the scroll didn’t technically extend to staying away from reading anything related to what was on the scroll, which he believed was probably more complex than being a simple story about the boy named Setsu and the fireflies he was trying to catch so he could find his way home.

There was an underlying message Naruto hadn’t quite caught that made it seem like he was reading a fable. Almost like one of those stories parents would tell their kids in order to teach them some lesson about life that would go over their heads until they were older. Naruto couldn’t exactly relate when he was a kid, either, but he could remember hearing about stories like that from other kids and reading enough of them on his own in order to find out what they meant.

Except, although Setsu’s story started off like one of those fables, the story didn’t pick up after Setsu’s fourth day in the forest. Sasuke had scribbled a few sentences about the scroll being unfinished and, not being able to translate any more of it, assumed Setsu never made his way out of the forest.

Because of how most of the more traditional fables he’d read ended, Naruto could see why Sasuke would think Setsu didn’t find his way home. But without an ending, there wasn’t a moral. Going by the way the story was presented, Naruto was sure it had to mean something, and the sooner Naruto was able to figure out what that meaning was, the sooner he’d have the answers he was looking for.

He wouldn’t claim to be as sharp as Sasuke on some things, but the timing of Sasuke receiving the scroll, Hotaru’s arrival and disappearance, and then Sasuke leaving for Kusagakure was too much of a coincidence in the span of one week for Naruto not to suspect there was some kind of connection. He’d put it off longer than he should have; Hotaru’s ability to find the house in the first place was a warning sign that shouldn’t have been forgotten. Like Iruka kept bringing up, maybe Naruto and Sasuke had been too eager to accept Hotaru at face value when they should have been concentrating on how Hotaru suddenly came into their lives. A lot of it had to do with Hotaru’s uncanny likeness to them, the kid he and Sasuke would never have that made it easier to form an relationship, but stranger things had happened. So what was it, specifically, about Hotaru that made them both ready to overlook their initial concerns?

More importantly, why weren’t he and Sasuke the only ones?

With that in mind, Sasuke had to have suspected something, too. Or at least Sasuke had to have thought something was out of place if it was the first conclusion Naruto came to after reading Sasuke’s translation. If that was the case, it definitely placed some perspective on the secrecy surrounding the scroll Sasuke wasn’t supposed to talk about or let anyone else read that, as far as Naruto knew, wasn’t worth anything. It had some sentimental value, Naruto did take into account, a possession rightfully belonging to Kusagakure that Konoha was now returning in an attempt to repair the flimsy relationship existing between the two villages. The scroll was an informal gesture at most. More to the point, Naruto didn’t think the elders of either village would have trusted Sasuke with the scroll by himself or at all if the scroll was more than the relic Sasuke told him it was.

In retrospect, whatever good that was, it was weird that Tsunade had even mentioned the scroll at all that day, especially since Sasuke would have told Naruto about it anyway. Like Naruto at the time, Tsunade had been unnerved by Hotaru and his comfortable interaction with Sasuke, but the uneasiness in her eyes was replaced with a cool indifference the moment Sasuke confirmed receiving the scroll from Kakashi the day before.

Naruto had been aware of the possibility of Sasuke being sent on a low-ranked assignment well ahead of time, before he even left for his own scouting mission, and it was, for lack of a better word, random that Tsunade would bring it up in front of Naruto when she should have been too preoccupied with the fact that a near carbon copy of Naruto was sitting on Sasuke’s lap. It only seemed a little suspicious, though. Naruto was more transfixed by the idea of how he and Sasuke were supposed to deal with a kid who literally showed up on their doorstep. Tsunade’s unexpected and almost impulsive willingness to allow Hotaru to be their responsibility was something Naruto really hadn’t had a chance to put further consideration into then. And while hindsight did have its advantages, he couldn’t escape the feeling that it was a case of being too little, too late.

“Well…” Naruto chewed on his bottom lip, mentally preparing himself for any kind of possible backlash from Sasuke. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“How much did you read?”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

Gradually moving away from the chair, Sasuke began walking towards the couch, gaze still fixed on the notebook in Naruto’s hand. He pulled on the bag slung over his back. It was the old bag Naruto wouldn’t allow himself to throw out, the same one Sasuke had obsessed about yesterday: taking things out and putting them back in the bag, over and over again to the point where the scene played out like some twisted ritual Sasuke was using as a safeguard.

Sasuke’s forehead protector hung somewhat loosely around his head, slightly crooked with one side almost falling over his left eye. He looked as drained as Naruto felt, possibly more so than he did when Naruto went into their room to check on him while Sasuke was sleeping. But being tired obviously didn’t affect Sasuke’s observation skills, and if there had been any chance of Naruto denying what he held in his hand, it was gone by the time Sasuke reached him.

“How much,” Sasuke repeated slowly, “did you read?”

“Like I said, I couldn’t sleep.”

Sasuke gripped the strap of the bag, pulling it tightly against his shoulder. “I told you not to read it.”

“Well, how could I not read it?” Flinging the notebook on the couch, Naruto stood, forcing Sasuke to take a couple of steps back. “It was right there, right there on the desk where you shouldn’t have left it if you didn’t want me to look at it.”

“I shouldn’t have to hide something like that.”

“What difference does it make?”

“How can you—I trusted you not to read it.”

“You told me I wasn’t supposed to read the scroll. I didn’t read the scroll. What’s the problem?”

Sasuke tilted his head to the side, and any other time, Naruto would have laughed at the expression on Sasuke’s face. “Are you serious?”

“I didn’t,” Naruto said tightly, “do anything wrong.”

Even if the only difference between reading the scroll and reading the translation was a minor technicality, Naruto couldn’t believe it was wrong when all he was trying to do was figure out how to make things right. Not after he’d been so close to losing Sasuke yesterday.

Sure, physically, Sasuke was fine now. Sakura had said it was exhaustion, nothing that a few hours of rest wouldn’t fix and, later on that same day, apparently did. The loss of memory, Sakura couldn’t say whether it was subconsciously induced or not. She chalked it up to stress induced sleepwalking, which she also said would be the cause of the unresponsive state Sasuke was in, but Naruto was convinced it was more than that. Sasuke had never had any problems with sleepwalking before, and, despite not being able to find anything significantly wrong with Sasuke, Sakura had looked hesitant to admit she thought Naruto’s version of events sounded too farfetched to believe. 

But it was like nothing happened. Sasuke hadn’t shown signs of the symptoms he had when Naruto first found him in the forest—so…so _still_ that Naruto wouldn’t have known Sasuke was even breathing if he hadn’t noticed how unbelievably slow Sasuke’s chest had risen and fallen. He remembered all too well just sitting there, Sasuke’s deadweight against him, and the panic that set in with the feeling of not being able to do anything.

To make things worse, Naruto had made a rookie mistake. He froze. For a moment he couldn’t think, and although it wasn’t long, it cost Naruto the time he couldn’t have afforded to waste. In those few seconds, before the thought of using his shadow clones had even occurred to him, Naruto felt trapped—torn between choosing to look after Sasuke and leaving to look for Hotaru.

And it wasn’t fair.

It made sense to think that if Naruto had found Sasuke, he would have found Hotaru, too, or at least somewhere nearby. But there had been no sign of Hotaru’s chakra signature, and Sasuke’s was fading too fast. However, even in his momentary state of panic, Naruto had made the subconscious decision to stay with Sasuke, losing the small window of opportunity that may have provided the leverage Naruto needed to find Hotaru. He’d taken Sasuke home because it was closer, because he’d been afraid of moving Sasuke at all, but it hadn’t taken long for one of his clones to come back with a resolute Sakura in tow, Kakashi and Iruka arriving only a few minutes later.

He couldn’t risk that, bear the thought of Sasuke leaving him again, leaving Naruto to deal with not only being unable to bring Sasuke back but with the more harsh reality of Sasuke not being alive. It was bad enough the second time he found Sasuke in the forest, six hours after Naruto reluctantly left Sasuke at the house with Kakashi, when he came across Sasuke kneeling on the floor of the same clearing and trying to make a repeat performance of scaring Naruto shitless.

Sasuke had been upset about Naruto’s decision, of course, and Naruto hadn’t expected anything less. At first, there was an eerie sense of calm, Sasuke watching him like he was waiting for Naruto to confirm something Sasuke already knew. Assuming Kakashi had told Sasuke about Hotaru missing, the sheer amount of compliance from Sasuke, for something Naruto hadn’t even said, was enough to make Naruto waver. His anger at seeing Sasuke by himself in that place, seeing Sasuke wasn’t safe at home where Kakashi said he’d look after him, was deflated by one look. One look was all it had taken to break Naruto’s resolve and admit he’d been no closer to finding Hotaru in those first couple of hours than Sasuke had been in remembering what happened earlier that morning and how he ended up nearly unconscious in the woods.

In not so many words, Sasuke had all but blamed Naruto for not going after Hotaru, for wasting his time worrying about someone who had a better chance of taking care of himself than a kid, but Naruto had thought Sasuke was…

If his choice was a result of his own selfishness, then Naruto could handle shouldering the blame. The only problem was, even after the anger had left Sasuke’s eyes, Naruto still couldn’t help but feel like the bad guy.

He just didn’t know whether to feel guilty about the fact he hadn’t immediately left Sasuke and personally taken off to look for Hotaru or the fact that if he’d been in a position to do it all over again, he couldn’t honestly say he would have done anything differently.

“You’re not that dense.” Sasuke gave a disbelieving scoff that turned into a derisive laugh. “I know you’re not that dense, Naruto. There is absolutely no way you’re that dense.”

“Okay—fine, then. I don’t care anymore.” Naruto threw his hands into the air. “Take it back. Take the notebook with you just to make sure I won’t touch it when you’re gone. I couldn’t read the damn scroll anyway.”

“That’s not the point. I told you—”

“I needed to look, all right. Ever since I got back, something’s been going on, and I know it has to do with that scroll. You’re probably in the middle of whatever’s happening, but you won’t tell me anything. Oh, I’m sorry, you _can’t_ tell me anything. And really, you expect me to what—sit here and act like everything’s okay?”

Sasuke seemed taken aback for a moment but was quick to recover. “Maybe you should.”

“…what?”

“I already told you not go near it, and yet you did it anyway. What’s in that scroll was none of your damn business.”

“Don’t you dare tell me it’s none of my business. No matter how you feel about it, I’m part of this, too, because when something affects you, it sure as hell affects me. We agreed to do this together, Sasuke. Don’t back out on me now. Don’t think you can take the easy way out on this one.”

“What part of me not having a choice do you not understand? It doesn’t matter whether I wanted to tell you about it or not. And so help me, Naruto, if the fact that you even _touched_ the scroll, much less read those notes, keeps me from—”

“And you think completing some D-ranked mission is more important than looking for Hotaru?” Naruto scoffed. “Yeah, like that’s really going to improve your chances of winning any popularity contests.”

Letting go of the strap in his hand, Sasuke let his arm fall to the side and closed his eyes. He looked like he wanted to say something, stuck between wanting to hit Naruto and walking away from the conversation altogether. He did neither and focused instead on regulating his breathing.

Apprehension in the pit of his stomach, Naruto was instantly reminded of yesterday morning. The unmistakable fear he had tried to put aside was coming back, but when Sasuke finally opened his eyes, Naruto released a noticeable sigh of relief.

“What do you want me to do?” Sasuke asked.

Naruto ran a hand through his hair, trying to get rid of the uncomfortable tension slowly creeping into his body. He vaguely wondered how Sasuke would respond if he asked Sasuke to stay, if Sasuke was simply waiting for Naruto to say it outright and if it would make a difference at all in Sasuke’s final decision. Fully aware of Sasuke’s expectant gaze, Naruto swallowed the lump in his throat. He wanted to believe he held that much influence over Sasuke but cursed himself for not being able to say the first thing that came to mind.

“I…I don’t know.”

“Whatever.” There was something close to disappointment on Sasuke’s face, something Naruto wasn’t sure if he saw or not.

“Sasuke…”

“We can finish this when I get back.” Sasuke made an attempt to leave, but Naruto grabbed his sleeve and pulled him back.

“Just listen to me, all right. It’s obvious this is bothering you.”

Sasuke pushed Naruto’s hand away. “I didn’t say anything was bothering me.”

“I might not understand what the scroll has to do with the last few days, but it doesn’t take a genius to recognise that Hotaru not being here is bothering you. You’re not okay, Sasuke, but guess what—that’s fine as long as you stop trying to pretend you are. Don’t push yourself so hard just to cover it up. It’s not like anybody is forcing you to go, and it wouldn’t change how the people that matter saw you.”

“And when have I ever cared about how other people see me?”

“You’re right,” Naruto agreed, a stubbornness in his voice that rivalled Sasuke’s refusal to admit he wasn’t coping with Hotaru’s disappearance. “But it still wouldn’t change how I saw you if you decided not to go. You can’t think that I’d ever look down on you for something like this, Sasuke.”

“Don’t be so full of yourself. This isn’t about that.”

“Then explain to me what I don’t understand.”

Sasuke replied with a sharp look that didn’t have the intended effect of making Naruto recoil. “Drop it.”

“Can’t you see how wrong all of this is?”

It was frustrating, so incredibly nerve-racking that he couldn’t get why Sasuke was so fixated on the idea of Hotaru being gone for good, and Naruto was on the verge of ripping his hair out. He knew Sasuke cared. The look on Sasuke’s face, the anxiety teetering too close to hopelessness that mirrored Naruto’s own, said more than words ever could.

“It’s only been a day. No, it’s been less than that, and you’re telling me you’ve given up already? Hotaru could still be out there somewhere, waiting for us to find him, and—”

“Shut up, Naruto,” Sasuke snarled. “Just shut up and get over it because Hotaru isn’t coming back.” His eyes flashed for a moment, a hint of red seeping through black.

Naruto blinked, unconsciously retreating just a little at the unexpected change of colour in Sasuke’s eyes. “How do you—”

“Because I can _feel_ it. I don’t—” Straining to find his voice, Sasuke turned away from Naruto. Taking a step back, he rubbed the palm of his hand against his forehead, and it was clear to Naruto that Sasuke was trying to refrain from displaying how agitated he really was. “Just—I can feel it, all right. Hotaru isn’t coming back. And whatever stunt you think you’re going to pull isn’t going to make a difference.”

Pausing, Sasuke took a deep breath and met Naruto’s gaze. “So don’t make it any worse than it already is.”

“Why are you so against this?” Naruto whispered. “Why are you so convinced that we won’t find Hotaru?”

“Why are you so convinced that you can even bring Hotaru back?”

“Because I—”

“Because you’re clinging to an ideal of someone that was never real to begin with—Hotaru was never supposed to be here. None of this was supposed to happen.”

“Then tell me how you know. Convince me, Sasuke. All I need is one reason, and I’ll leave it alone.”

“For the last time—”

“Forget about the scroll. Forget about whatever Tsunade and Kakashi said to you. Give me something I can work with—let me fix this. Please, I can—”

“There’s nothing you can do, Naruto, and the sooner you learn to accept it, the sooner you can move on.”

Gritting his teeth, Naruto grabbed Sasuke’s left wrist, loosening his hold but not letting go when Sasuke didn’t hide the slight wince on his face. Obviously, he wasn’t doing a good job of getting through to Sasuke, but the way Sasuke was around Hotaru, the time the three of them spent together in spite of how short it was, how could it have been anything else but real?

“You can’t tell me you’re just going to pretend that none of this happened. That Hotaru being here didn’t mean something to you. That what we had—”

“Stop putting words in my mouth.”

“Like hell I am. You think this is dealing with it? I know you’re better than this, but if you think running from the problem is going to make it go away, then you’re nothing but a coward, Sasuke. You’re pathetic if you’re going to just give up like that.”

“Look at yourself before you start throwing around baseless accusations. It’s your inability to see past your own self-fulfilling ass that makes you the pathetic one. Not me.”

“Well, if that makes me pathetic, then apparently I’m the only one who thinks Hotaru is worth fighting for.”

There was a flicker of emotion in Sasuke’s eyes, revealing a hurt Naruto realised he was the cause of, but it was quickly masked with a sneer.

Sasuke tore his wrist away from Naruto’s hand, nearly making Naruto fall back on the couch, but Naruto could only stare, lost in some kind of stupor as he watched Sasuke walk away.

“Think what you want, Naruto.”

“Wait, Sasuke…I didn’t…”

Sasuke stopped in front of the door, his fingers hovering above the knob. Shoulders hunched, he hesitated before opening the door. Naruto thought he was going to turn around, but Sasuke only shook his head. “I don’t have time for this.”

The door closed behind Sasuke with a soft click, almost as quiet as the sorry Naruto didn’t say, and maybe, Naruto wanted to think, the silence that followed wouldn’t have been so deafening if Sasuke had slammed the door instead.

...

Stopping in front of Konoha’s main entrance, Sasuke lifted his head to peer over the height of the gate. He blinked at the streaks of yellow and hues of red marring the sky, at the vibrant colours emerging against a pale blue backdrop. Light trickled through the gaps of the metal fence bordering the top of gate, offering a passing warmth faint on Sasuke’s cheeks. It was still early, even by Konoha’s standards, but the relative quiet felt out of place. 

Naruto grunted beside him, wincing at the sun glaring in his direction, and placed a hand over his eyes in an attempt to shield them. He seemed content to wait, and Sasuke was content to prolong the inevitable separation, not entirely sure what he was waiting for. Naruto turned his face away from the sun and leaned against the trunk of a tree. There was a slight curl at the corner of the right side of Naruto’s mouth, and he sent Sasuke a sideways glance, casually folding his arms behind his head. 

It was easier to forget sometimes, for Sasuke to feel complacent behind the walls of the home he settled into with Naruto, into the life that was sheltered from the rest of the village, rather than feel detained by the large wooden doors on either side of him.

And right now, the apparent normalcy of the situation was staggering.

As if Sasuke had somehow mistaken the last seven days for a dream and he’d simply been drifting in the haze that remained. Whispers in the back of his mind of something so whimsical, Sasuke wanted to believe he’d imagined it instead. But Naruto had kept insisting the last seven days had in fact taken place and wouldn’t stop rehashing the very thing Sasuke was trying to bury.

That argument had been short-lived. Sasuke didn’t have the energy to argue a moot point and had readily conceded. He knew better than to take Naruto’s words seriously, and as soon as he closed the door, there had been no doubt in Sasuke’s mind that Naruto would follow him.

He’d heard Naruto’s voice less than a minute later. It followed the sound of the door opening and then closing and resonated in the otherwise still atmosphere. When he heard Naruto call his name again, Sasuke took more deliberate steps. What little irritation Naruto had been able to incite was fleeting and left Sasuke to dwell on the increasing distance behind him as he waited for Naruto to catch up.

They’d fallen into a companionable silence, Naruto’s mouth set in a firm line and his shoulder occasionally brushing against Sasuke’s arm. The gesture was hardly subtle, but Sasuke didn’t shy away from the unspoken apology Naruto didn’t need to say.

It was a testament to how much closer they’d become, a far cry from the days when Sasuke fought against how increasingly reliant on Naruto he was becoming. The same could be said of Naruto, but that kind of co-dependency was precariously close to being one of the more unhealthy aspects of their relationship. On occasion, he did realise that he still took Naruto’s persistence for granted, how far Naruto would actually go for him, and the unsettling feeling Sasuke had been carrying since he woke up was replaced with a burgeoning reluctance that almost made Sasuke wonder if he would have said yes if Naruto had asked him to stay.

But Tsunade had given him an ultimatum this morning: either Sasuke would leave for Kusagakure today or he would be forced to renounce the assignment, and his eligibility for future missions, regardless of ranking, would be indeterminately held in question.

Initially, he’d expected Tsunade to say no. He’d been mentally prepared to argue his capability to continue with the mission, and on some level, Sasuke was surprised when she had no objections despite being informed of the less than favourable state Naruto found him in yesterday. However, her lack of concern was brutal it its understatement and less tolerable than the outright refusal Sasuke had thought more likely.

Immediately, Naruto had been put on edge. He’d felt Naruto stiffen beside him, the consequences of an accumulating anger too plain on Naruto’s face, but Sasuke had accepted with the added stipulations before Naruto had an opportunity to argue for more agreeable terms on Sasuke’s behalf.

It wasn’t a question of whether or not Sasuke wanted to go. He’d already made a commitment and fully intended to carry out the mission. Naturally, pride had been a deciding factor. Sasuke wouldn’t deny that, but there had been something about Tsunade’s demeanour that caught his attention. The way she spoke to him, more specifically, the words she used, it was almost as if she’d been pushing Sasuke to leave, and the look in her eyes reminded Sasuke of that same sureness in Kakashi’s voice when he insinuated knowing about the ending of the story in the scroll Sasuke was delivering to Kusagakure.

But Sasuke had an ulterior motive, too, a personal obligation he owed to Hotaru. Especially during a time like this, he could be as single-minded as Naruto was relentless, and, contrary to what Naruto thought, Sasuke wasn’t trying to take the easy way out.

The only way to find any semblance of understanding in what was going on was to go to the source. Sasuke needed to visit Kusagakure to learn what hadn’t been divulged to him when he received the mission. As far as he could actually discern, the scroll was more than a circumstantial element in Hotaru’s existence. Sasuke had nothing concrete to prove it, but Tsunade couldn’t have possibly thought it was something he’d overlook. While he had his qualms about Tsunade because of his rigid relationship with her, Sasuke respected her as a person, particularly for her intelligence, and couldn’t believe she would have assumed he’d be too engrossed with his newly derived status in lieu of neglecting something so blaringly obvious.

Moreover, if Kakashi’s conspicuous behaviour over the past week was any indication, it was a waste of time for Sasuke to think he’d find any answers in Konoha. Kakashi had been supportive in the beginning, encouraging in some instances when it came to Sasuke and Naruto taking care of Hotaru despite Sasuke’s aggravation with him, yet Kakashi had been oddly reserved yesterday. He’d given off an alarming impression of self-reproach, sustained by his reluctance to speak with Sasuke, and Sasuke took both as akin to an admission of guilt. Although how much Kakashi was involved, Sasuke wasn’t sure. 

No, taking the easy way out would entail blaming Naruto for not immediately going after Hotaru, for not forgetting about Sasuke altogether because Sasuke had been grappling with that daunting certainty, that part of him working to steadily convince himself that Hotaru wasn’t coming back. He’d said it when Naruto had found him the second time, but the words had just as soon been retracted by the feebleness behind them. For Sasuke’s benefit, it would have been far less problematic to hold Naruto at fault, easier than having to admit why he’d been so apprehensive about Naruto reading his notes on the scroll.

Selfishly, Sasuke didn’t want Naruto to know. It was only a matter of time until Naruto picked up on it, and Sasuke wasn’t surprised when Naruto had fallen victim to his own curiosity. Even before he walked in on Naruto going through his notebook, Sasuke expected Naruto to have already pieced together his own assumptions. Neither of them could escape the correlations between Hotaru and the scroll, with or without reading the story about Setsu.

But there was a marked distinction in Naruto associating Hotaru’s arrival with the day after Sasuke received the scroll and Naruto drawing parallels between Hotaru and the story within the scroll. Naruto knowing threatened to negate the reality of Hotaru’s existence, cemented the reason behind why Hotaru was gone, and yet hadn’t been enough to deter Naruto from thinking he could bring Hotaru back.

Maybe there was some truth in Naruto’s assertion that Sasuke was trying to run away, trying to distance himself from Naruto so he wouldn’t give into the small part of him that wanted to believe Naruto could fix it. But it wasn’t something Naruto could fix. Not this time because the more he saw Naruto, the harder it was becoming to see Hotaru in that face with features he knew so well, and Sasuke felt everything around him crashing at the increasing lack of familiarity.

“You’re not even listening to me, are you?”

Sasuke turned slowly, taking his gaze away from the gate to look at Naruto. “Hm?”

Rolling his eyes, Naruto pushed himself away from the tree he’d been leaning against and walked toward Sasuke. “I guess I know how you feel now, huh?”

Sasuke nodded absently, grimacing when Naruto reached to straighten the forehead protector that didn’t need to be adjusted. He motioned for Naruto leave it alone, making an attempt to push Naruto away, but Naruto swatted at his hand and left Sasuke to reconcile with Naruto being insufferable.

“You can’t expect the thing to stay on if you don’t tie it tight enough. Jeeze…” Naruto moved his hands behind Sasuke’s head and redid the loose knot hidden in Sasuke’s hair. Sasuke grunted at the feel of the forehead protector pressed more securely against his skin. “You’d think after all this time you’d be able to do something so simple on your own.”

Taking a step back, Naruto tilted his head to the side. There was a quick upturn of his lips, a meagre imitation of the kind of smile accompanying whenever Naruto wanted to convey reassurance to Sasuke, but Sasuke was still able to find consolation in the implication behind it. “There.” 

“Now it’s too tight.”

“Which means it’s less likely to fall off.”

“You’re an idiot if you think I’m going to lose a forehead protector, Naruto.”

“Well, you’ve called me an idiot in the past, so…”

“I couldn’t lose this one, anyway, not after you’ve had your way with it.”

“Don’t make something like that sound so perverted.”

“And I’d like to think I’d notice missing the thing that’s cutting off my blood circulation.”

“Ha ha.” Naruto tapped Sasuke’s forehead protector. “Very funny.”

Sasuke snorted. It was as funny as Naruto’s voice wasn’t dry, but Sasuke couldn’t claim humour as a forte. The unintentional attempt to re-establish the relaxed atmosphere usually between them provided a transition into another elongated silence, and Sasuke released a long suffering sigh, trying to remember the last time he’d felt so inept around Naruto.

“It’s nice outside today,” Naruto said, digging the heel of his right sandal into the dirt.

Sasuke made a noncommittal noise in agreement. He was distracted by his focused awareness of what Naruto was doing and irked because he couldn’t place why it struck him as something that stood out.

“Too bad we can’t stay like this forever,” Naruto mused. “But I can see both of us getting bored of it pretty fast.”

Sasuke shrugged his shoulders, not intending to comment. When he was anxious, Naruto had a habit of rambling. He spoke for the sake of speaking to fill any quiet intervals in a conversation, but Sasuke was startled when he heard the abruptness in Naruto’s voice and the subsequent, seemingly indiscriminate change in topic.

“I’m still going to look for Hotaru, you know,” Naruto said firmly. “Even if that’s all I’m able to do at this point, I promise you that much I _can_ do. I don’t care what you say because I know how you really feel about it—how we both feel about it, and I’m not giving up on something like this.

“Oh, yeah, and one more thing before you go, Sasuke.” Brows furrowed, Naruto grabbed Sasuke’s vest with both hands, two fingers from each hand digging into the front pockets. He snarled as he yanked Sasuke to his chest, not giving Sasuke a chance to react at the sudden movement.

Although he was caught by surprise, Sasuke didn’t resist. Naruto wasn’t trying to provoke him. It wasn’t a matter of strength or having the upper hand, an opening to use fighting as a means to deal with any pent up frustrations. Without question, Naruto would have let go without any objection, and Sasuke would have taken control of the situation if necessary, but Sasuke saw it for what it was. It was Naruto testing Sasuke’s personal boundaries, Naruto wanting to assert for himself that Sasuke was _there_ in one of the least roundabout ways possible. Physicality meant that much more since Naruto was such a tactile person, and Sasuke couldn’t bring himself to push Naruto away even if he wanted to.

Honestly, he didn’t think he had many limitations left whenever Naruto was concerned, but, at the very least, he could allow this. Sasuke could do this for Naruto because Naruto was only asking for something tangible he could hold on to before Sasuke left. 

It was a stilted moment between them, further encouraged by a palpable distance despite their proximity that Sasuke didn’t want to think had anything to do with Hotaru’s disappearance. Their bodies were almost flush, close enough for anyone else to perceive the positioning as clumsy and awkward, although too far apart for Sasuke to feel comfortable enough to relax against Naruto and return the gesture.

But this wasn’t quite the initiation of a hug, a personal feat Sasuke didn’t want to admit he could easily fall into in a place where people couldn’t see them. This was Naruto gripping hard, disinclined to let go, and Sasuke was only marginally better at hiding the fact he didn’t know what to do at this point, either.

“You better not try to run off because of this,” Naruto murmured into Sasuke’s ear. He said it teasingly, but the disheartening laugh that followed made his attempt to lighten the mood fall short. “Don’t tempt me, Sasuke, or I’m going to hunt you down, do whatever it takes to beat your ass into the ground, and _then_ drag you back home.”

“Like I’d let you.”

“You wouldn’t have a choice. I’d bring you back,” Naruto countered. “ _Again_.” He paused and, as an afterthought, said, “Kicking and screaming if I have to.”

Shaking his head, Sasuke didn’t make the effort to interrupt Naruto and amend his version of events. Those were different circumstances then. It was Kakashi who had dragged them both back to Konoha, completely omitting the kicking and screaming part as he and Naruto had been unconscious, but of course Naruto would purposely overlook the finer details in favour of making a statement.

“I’m serious, Sasuke.” Naruto tugged on Sasuke’s vest again. “Got that?”

Sasuke bit his lip, hoping to curb the unexpected and inane laughter beginning to build. It was an idle threat for the most part, but he knew well from experience there was an unspoken plea concealed within the casual tone of the words, the fear of Sasuke ever leaving Konoha again—leaving Naruto again—tinged by the slight waver of Naruto’s voice. Likewise, for Sasuke, there was something equally terrifying about the sheer amount of confidence Naruto had in him, how devoted Naruto was to someone like him, and sometimes, even with all those years behind them, Sasuke still had difficultly coming to terms with it.

Stepping back, Naruto released his hold on Sasuke’s pockets. He looked unsure of what to do with his hands and eventually decided to work on smoothing the wrinkles in the vest he’d muddled. His fingers drifted over Sasuke’s arms and moved to brush imaginary flecks of dust off Sasuke’s shoulder, shaking slightly until Naruto shoved his hands in his own pockets in an attempt to keep his fingers at bay. 

Naruto feigned a cough. “So, um…yeah—you have everything you need, right?”

“I’m fine.” But the words came out too breathy. It was like something was compressing his vocal chords, creating a taut and abrasive sound that made Sasuke’s mouth feel dry.

“Good. That’s…go—great.” Naruto nodded slowly. “You know, it’s weird that I forgot how hard something like this could be. Was it hard for you to—wait, don’t answer that.”

Naruto sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “I really didn’t want to say anything embarrassing, but I guess it’s too late for that now.”

“Naruto, I…”

“Don’t, okay,” Naruto whispered. “You don’t have to say anything because…”

“…yeah, okay.”

“Besides, one more week won’t hurt, right?” Naruto offered another one of those paltry smiles, although it wasn’t as reassuring as Sasuke wanted to be despite being the same kind of smile Naruto had offered earlier, having the same effect on him now that it did then, and Sasuke used the circular reasoning to walk away from it.

He felt Naruto’s eyes boring into his back as he kept his gaze forward, the goodbye left unsaid lingering between them, but Sasuke wouldn’t let himself look back until he was sure that when he did, Naruto would be out of sight.

...

Sakura set her mug on the table gently, barely making a sound as she peered at Naruto. Her tea was probably cold by now, and Naruto absently watched her face scrunch. She couldn’t hold back her disgust after forcing herself to swallow the remainder of the supposedly peach flavoured herbal tea in her mouth.

Aside from Sasuke, Sakura was the only person Naruto knew who would voluntary drink the stuff. Sakura claimed it was an acquired taste she could only stomach once in a while, but Sasuke actually admitted to enjoying it.

It almost made Naruto hurl when Sasuke first suggested he try it, something about having a calming effect that did wonders for Sasuke yet evidently did nothing for Naruto or anyone else with taste buds. Normally, Naruto didn’t mind drinking tea, but this one made his insides twist in some unnatural way. The smell alone was off-putting, never mind the taste, which Naruto discovered was ridiculously bitter even after steeping for only a few minutes. Dumping copious amounts of sugar didn’t help the tea go down easier, either. At the time, Naruto had honestly thought Sasuke was not so unintentionally trying to poison him because Sasuke was an undeclared passive-aggressive bastard who couldn’t just say whatever it was Naruto did that made him upset.

Then again, Naruto was on his sixth cup in two days.

“You know,” Sakura began softly, “Sasuke’s not going to have any tea left when he comes back if you continue like this.”

Naruto snorted. Sasuke bought enough of the tea to last for months if not years, probably more than enough to supply everyone in Konoha with a couple of bags. “Yeah, right. He pretty much lives off it.”

“Well, I’m just saying.” Sakura shifted awkwardly in the chair, fidgeting at the lag in the conversation, and Naruto tried not to think of how long it’d been since she’d cornered him in his own kitchen.

He sat on the side of the table furthest away from the door. A tactical move on her part, Sakura was sitting across from him and intentionally blocking his view of the only way out. Not that she needed to. Sakura may have come over under the impression that she was only concerned about his wellbeing, making Naruto grateful he wouldn’t be alone while dealing with thoughts of Sasuke and Hotaru, but Naruto couldn’t shake the feeling she was overseeing his temporary house arrest at the same time.

Right before he and Sasuke left Tsunade’s office, Tsunade told Sasuke to wait outside. Keeping Naruto from following, she tugged on his sleeve and closed the door as soon as Sasuke was in the hall.

Not letting Naruto get a word in, Tsunade had gone straight to the point, punctuating the seriousness of the soon to be one-sided discussion with an edge to her voice that gave Naruto no choice but to listen. Her eyes narrowed dangerously, but he held her gaze as she made it more than clear that Naruto was under no terms allowed to leave Konoha until tomorrow.

There was an onslaught of questions in his mind, too many for Naruto to wade through all at once but each leading him to the assumption it had something to do with why Tsunade seemed so eager to get Sasuke to leave for Kusagakure. But she’d hissed his name in warning, and any mention of the questions he wanted to demand her to answer died before it left Naruto’s lips. Her face had been too close, the scent of the flowery perfume she sometimes wore too strong, and he sneered instead, inwardly bristling and ignoring the fingers pressing into his skin. They wrapped around his arm, squeezing painfully, and Naruto took the hint to be quiet.

She’d given him some half-assed explanation. About her concern for Naruto not being in the right state of mind, not wanting him to risk running himself into the ground for a hapless cause—Naruto couldn’t remember exactly what she said. He couldn’t have cared less at the time because it would have been better if she hadn’t said anything at all. It was the fact that Tsunade, who had more or less encouraged Naruto and Sasuke to take Hotaru in, could dismiss Hotaru’s disappearance so easily, completely ignoring how much of an impact it was having on them, that stayed with Naruto. It provoked an anger he hadn’t been able to will down since she’d shoved him out of her office and nearly made him bump into Shizune on his way out the door.

Fumbling over his steps, Naruto had given a hasty apology, and Shizune bowed her head politely. She clutched the folder she was carrying, carelessly rearranging the loosened papers sticking out of it while she’d stared at Naruto and Sasuke with uncertainty. The brief hesitation was traded for a wavering smile when Tsunade called her name, but Shizune’s gaze remained on Sasuke a little longer before she bowed her head again and made her way into Tsunade’s office.

The exchange had been quick, as sudden as the few seconds it seemed Naruto spent alone with Tsunade in her office, and was just as strange as the warning Tsunade had given him.

Shizune got along with most of the people in the village. Sasuke was no exception. She had that kind of personality, but it didn’t explain her uncharacteristic nervousness when she saw them, especially in the way she had looked at Sasuke.

Naruto had pushed it aside then, hoping to distract Sasuke from thinking anything was wrong. Not sure if he wanted to tell Sasuke about his encounter with Tsunade just yet, Naruto made an attempt at a grin, masking both his anger and confusion with a weak joke about Tsunade and her various mood swings that was anything but funny.

Sasuke looked far from being convinced, but he had seemed as willing to ignore the sudden tension between them as much as Naruto was willing not to bring up what had happened with Tsunade. A sharp expression on his face, Sasuke began walking away. Naruto followed him down the hall with a relief that instantly began to fade the moment he watched Sasuke’s retreating figure disappear from view, and the momentary ease he had felt was gone by the time Naruto ran into Sakura on the way home.

If Tsunade was trying to intimidate him, it hadn’t worked. Naruto knew better to take her threat about him not leaving the village lightly, but, if anything, it only served to confirm the suspicions he already had about her. And with Shizune’s reaction to seeing Sasuke, something told Naruto Tsunade wasn’t alone in holding some kind of accountability.

The whole thing didn’t make sense. It shouldn’t have made a difference whether Naruto left to look for Hotaru today or tomorrow. Still, Tsunade had been firm, and the only thing that had been preventing Naruto from pressing the issue further then was the fact that Sasuke was waiting right outside the door. The entire situation had seemed almost too convenient, but Naruto knew it had neither been the time nor the place to bring it out in the open.

It was bad enough with Hotaru missing, Sasuke gone, the scroll that Naruto believed connected the two events, and Tsunade apparently somehow in the forefront of it all. There was too much happening at once. Everything unravelling in front of him, his thoughts a mess, and until he had a chance to sort them out, Naruto didn’t want to risk any kind of confrontation and do or say something he was going to regret.

But, Tsunade’s warning and casual dismissal of Hotaru aside, Naruto couldn’t deny a lot of his initial anger came from Tsunade’s decision to allow Sasuke to continue with his mission at all and much more so because of the ultimatum she had put forward. He didn’t know what Tsunade had been trying to pull. She’d essentially backed Sasuke into a corner, and, considering Sasuke’s personality, Tsunade hadn’t given Sasuke much of a choice other than to accept.

Naruto realised he’d do the same if he was faced with the decision. But on purely selfish grounds, he’d hoped Tsunade would have forced Sasuke to stay in Konoha. Sasuke’s protests notwithstanding, Sakura had been obligated to tell Tsunade about Sasuke losing consciousness for an indeterminable amount of time due to stress and exhaustion. Naruto would have said something to Tsunade anyway and had made a point to fill her in on his own version of events, including the unnatural glow he saw around Sasuke that Sakura had glossed over. Except Tsunade had been as receptive as Sakura when Naruto told her and didn’t have any reservations about Sasuke continuing with the mission as long as Sasuke felt up to it. 

This impulsive leaning toward denial, this preference of hiding behind the pretence of ignorance when things were clearly not okay, Naruto couldn’t wrap his head around it.

Even Kakashi, of all people, and Iruka hadn’t tried to persuade Sasuke to stay. Aside from Sasuke, they were the only other people who knew the extent of what really happened. Unlike Sasuke, whose refusal to comment about what Naruto had seen passed for believing Naruto, Kakashi and Iruka weren’t exactly as eager. To Kakashi’s credit, for a moment, it did seem like he wanted to talk Sasuke out of leaving. But he’d held back at the last minute, and Naruto found himself alone in actually speaking up about how uncomfortable he was with letting Sasuke go. 

But he reasoned he had a right to be uncomfortable with the thought of Sasuke travelling on his own when there was usually someone with him whenever he did travel outside of the village. Because Naruto had been scared yesterday, completely out of his mind, and it was taking everything in his power to smother the need bordering on desperation to run after Sasuke while he was waiting for the tomorrow that wasn’t today.

“It doesn’t suit you to look like that, Naruto.”

“Like what?” Naruto picked up the mug in front of him, holding it with both hands as he raised it to his mouth.

“The whole brooding thing—I can never get used to seeing you like this.”

“I’m sorry if the way I’m feeling right now makes you uncomfortable.” Although he was laying on the sarcasm, Naruto didn’t mean anything by it. He wasn’t irritated with Sakura per se, just…restless at not being able to do anything.

“You’re picking up on some of Sasuke’s bad habits.” Sakura sent Naruto a tentative smile. When he simply shrugged his shoulders, she took another small sip of her tea and continued to watch Naruto.

The obvious concern in her eyes felt more like pity rather than sympathy, and Naruto could pinpoint the last time she looked at him like that, when she tried to convince him that it was too late for Sasuke to ever come back to Konoha. But she had been wrong then, and she was wrong now, too, if she believed Naruto wouldn’t be able to bring back Hotaru like he did with Sasuke.

“I don’t know what to say about what you’re going through, Naruto. To be honest, I don’t think there’s anything I _can_ say,” Sakura admitted, “but I do know it doesn’t help to beat yourself up in a situation like this. It never does.”

Frowning, Naruto fiddled with the handle of his cup, slowly swinging it back and forth. “I’m not.”

“You are. It hasn’t even been a day, and I’m worried about you. Of course, I’m worried about Sasuke, too, but you have this tendency to not take care of yourself when you get caught up in things.”

“But this is different. Sasuke—”

“And I bet you’ve already made Sasuke worry about you. At least look after yourself for Sasuke’s sake if you won’t do it for your own. He’s not in a position to be distracted, regardless of whether or not you agree he should have been allowed to go to Kusagakure. Not to mention, how do you expect to find…” Sakura turned away, her eyes darting to the floor.

“What I’m saying is, Tsunade-sama doesn’t want you going off alone, and I think it’d be better if you took the time to rest. Besides, it’s not just you who’s tired.” Voice trailing off, Sakura added, “We all are.”

Numbly, Naruto nodded at the reminder. He hadn’t been able to sleep since yesterday, since he’d woken up in bed without either Sasuke or Hotaru, but it would have been careless of Naruto to overlook the fact that he hadn’t spent the entire day trying to find Hotaru on his own.

After Naruto had brought Sasuke back to the house, as soon as Sakura, Kakashi, and Iruka first came by and Sakura was confident that nothing was wrong with Sasuke, Kakashi had opted to stay with an unconscious Sasuke, urging a haggard Naruto to take Sakura and Iruka to look for Hotaru. Less than twenty minutes later, Kiba, Shikamaru, Ino joined the impromptu search party. They had volunteered as soon he told them Hotaru was missing, reading between the lines of Naruto’s false sense of controlled urgency. That they would offer to help so readily, without the slightest hesitation, Naruto felt an indescribable gratitude, offset only by the fact that, by the end of the day, they had been no closer to finding Hotaru than before.

It’d been strange coming home last night, following Sasuke inside without Hotaru running in front of them, and Naruto felt like he’ been callously thrown out of the world he’d been so swept up in the day before. Taken away from the life he was looking forward to getting used to, that extended moment where time moved so slowly everything else around him stood still until it just became _right_ —because then Naruto became aware that time had never stopped. Simply, the world had been spinning too fast for Naruto to have noticed a different kind of stillness, and when he’d passed the small pair of blue shoes that still looked brand new, idly stacked against the wall, it was the fracture that brought life back up to speed.

“I know you feel restless,” Sakura said. “And I won’t go into specifics to emphasise how unhealthy this is, but solely from someone with a medical standpoint and not your friend, I’d advise you to get some sleep.” 

“Let me know if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure that’s the point of being restless. I _can’t_.” 

Sakura sighed. “At least lie down on the couch or something and stop trying to keep yourself awake.”

“I wonder, why aren’t you more upset about this, Sakura-chan? Maybe then…”

It was a poor attempt to change the subject, but Sakura only scrunched her nose, deciding not to call Naruto out on it. Propping her elbow on the table, she rested the side of her face against her palm. “I’m not trying to come across as indifferent, but in the time that I’ve known Hotaru, I’ve only seen him twice.”

“What about the party, though?” Naruto asked, thrown off less by her unexpected honesty and more by the fact Sakura was referring to Hotaru without the chan honorific, like she was trying to distance herself from Hotaru. “I mean, wasn’t it your idea?”

“Yes,” Sakura said without hesitation. “Yes, it was, but you have to keep in mind that I didn’t have the opportunity to get to know Hotaru as much as you and Sasuke did, which apparently was much more than I thought you two could in such a short span of time. And while I do want to understand from your perspective, it’s almost as if you and Sasuke—well, to develop such an attachment so quickly…even a week later, it’s still something a little too strange for me to comprehend.”

Naruto sagged against his chair. It wasn’t that he didn’t agree. It was what everyone else who knew about Hotaru had already said, what Naruto himself thought when he barged in on Sasuke giving Hotaru a bath, completely confused at how relaxed Sasuke looked around a kid neither of them knew anything about.

“Hotaru was already attached to Sasuke. We couldn’t do anything about that, but are you saying we should have kept Hotaru in a closet or something?”

“You know that’s not what I’m saying.”

“Well, it’s just that you said you don’t want to sound indifferent, and I’m not saying you’re doing it on purpose, but…”

Sakura reached across the table for Naruto’s hand, placing it in between her own hands. She rubbed her thumb against his wrist and gave him another smile that wasn’t as soothing as Naruto wanted it to be.

“It actually hurts to admit that I don’t know you as well as I once did. Of course, I don’t think I ever really knew Sasuke. Not like you anyway. It took me a while to realise there wasn’t that kind of connection between us, but there was always something about you that I felt I could relate to.”

“Ah…you’re not trying to come on to me, Sakura-chan?” Naruto tried to joke. “It’s kind of too late for that.”

Sakura scoffed and shook her head.

“As long as you know,” Naruto said lamely.

“Despite how hard I’ve tried…” Her face pensive, Sakura stared at Naruto’s hand. “We really have grown apart, haven’t we?”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t want you to think I’m suddenly pushing my feelings on you, especially at a time like this, but it’s always been hard not to feel left out around you and Sasuke. Maybe even more so that I’m older and I can recognise why I used to see myself as the one who was left behind and not just in terms of power or ability. What I want to say is that, even though I don’t understand what happened between you and Sasuke when Hotaru appeared, it doesn’t mean I don’t care how it affects you. And, not that either of you needed me before, but—but it’s okay if you come to me once in a while. I’ll still be here.”

“Don’t say it like Hotaru isn’t coming back.” Frowning, Naruto pulled his hand away from Sakura’s. “I can’t accept that.” 

“Naruto, you have to—”

“I made a promise, Sakura-chan. I promised Sasuke I wouldn’t stop looking for Hotaru, and I have to keep it because it already feels like…”

“It feels like what, Naruto?”

“Like an important part of me is gone, an important part of us—me and Sasuke—is gone, and I don’t know what to do.” Naruto gripped the edge of the table, nails scraping against the hard surface of the wood. “I was supposed to watch out for them. I told myself I was going to do everything to make sure things were going to turn out okay.”

“But this isn’t your fault.”

“I never said it was my fault.”

Sakura pursed her lips. “Do you blame Sasuke?”

“What?” Naruto looked at her in surprise. “How can you even think—?”

“Well, he was the last one to see Hotaru, wasn’t he? Would it really be that out of place to suspect Sasuke had something to do with Hotaru’s disappearance?”

“Sasuke is—Sasuke’s the one who…”

“But Sasuke isn’t the one losing sleep.”

“That’s not true.”

“Sasuke isn’t the one who’s not eating.”

“That doesn’t have to do with anything.”

“Sasuke isn’t the one who’s on the brink of collapsing.”

Naruto stood from the table, the legs of the chair dragging across the floor at the sharp movement, but Sakura stood, as well, showing no signs of being intimidated. “And if Sasuke isn’t the one going through those things, shouldn’t it make more sense to transfer the blame to someone who deserves it?”

“None of this is Sasuke’s fault,” Naruto bit out. “Sasuke doesn’t deserve—”

“Naruto!”

The shout caught Naruto by surprise, and Sakura placed a hand on his shoulder. Using a little more strength than Naruto thought was necessary, she forced him back in his seat. “This isn’t like you, Naruto.”

“Sakura-chan, I’m…I didn’t—”

“Nobody is blaming you.” Sakura rubbed Naruto’s shoulder gently before moving to sit in a chair closer to him. “And if you can’t blame Sasuke, then you should understand why you don’t need to blame yourself.”

“I’m not.”

“That’s not what it looks like to me.”

“You want to hear that I think it’s my fault Hotaru’s gone—that I’ve could have done something to prevent it when I had the chance? Is that what you want me to say?”

Sakura placed her hands in her lap. “I want you to take care of yourself, Naruto. That’s all.”

“...let me ask you a question then.”

“Sure.”

Raising his cup to his lips, Naruto drank the rest of his tea in one gulp. It was cold but still tasted just as bitter as it did warm. “You think it’s okay to be insecure every once in a while, right?”

“I think it’s normal.”

“Well, just to put this out there, I guess, whenever I’m with Sasuke, it still feels like the whole thing between us is kind of new. In spite of everything I’ve done to get closer to Sasuke that feeling is still there. Honestly, I wasn’t sure what would happen when Hotaru first showed up, but I didn’t have time to look back, you know. Even though we didn’t know who he was, we weren’t going to throw him out. Hotaru didn’t have anywhere to go. And it was…nice. It was really nice, Sakura-chan. I mean, between the three of us, something was there. I didn’t know what it was last week. I still don’t know now, but I told myself it wouldn’t matter as long as I didn’t allow that _something_ to go away.”

“Naruto…”

“So, here I am, trying to figure out how I managed to lose it. If it’s something that important to me, why’d I let it happen? And then I start thinking, what if I never get it back?”

Sakura wrapped an arm around Naruto’s neck. “I remember a long time ago, right after what happened with Sasuke’s family, I used to ask my mom about you and Sasuke. Sasuke spent most of his time with his brother up until that point, probably because he lived so far away from the rest of us, but he didn’t really make an effort to keep up with anyone his own age. And you, well, it wasn’t your fault at any rate. Still, you two were the odd ones out in our group.

“It’s funny because you guys weren’t really friends then, either, but sometimes, you would chase after him even though he didn’t want you to. And sometimes, when he got tired of running and trying to push you away, he would let you in. No matter how many people tried to reach out to him, you were the one he would respond to, the one he would give a smile to. I don’t think you guys realised it at the time, how alike you both were. Or maybe you did and it was just that neither of you wanted to acknowledge it. 

“I think that’s why so many of the girls didn’t like you later on when we were chuunin. They—we, I mean—were jealous because you had this bond with Sasuke that none of us had. It’s different now, of course. Sasuke allows people to get closer to him but never like what he has with you.

“You were one of the few people to get Sasuke to smile like that again, Naruto. And Sasuke was one of the first people to accept you for who you were regardless of what the rest of the village said about you.”

Naruto sighed and rested his head against Sakura’s. “I hear what you’re saying and everything, but what’s your point?”

“You look at Sasuke in a certain way. I’m not sure how to describe it, but don’t forget Sasuke looks at you in that way, too. I wish I felt as sure about finding Hotaru as I do with your relationship with Sasuke, but…no matter what happens—even if this isn’t my place to say it—just, at the very least, if it’s your relationship with Sasuke you’re worried about, maybe this is for the best? Maybe—”

Naruto pulled away from Sakura’s embrace and removed her hand from around his neck. “I’m sorry, Sakura-chan, but I can’t believe it’s better for things to end up like this, and you’re one of the last people I expected to hear say something like that.”

“Naruto…”

Naruto wanted to tell her not to look at him like that, with the same pity she’d given him earlier, but the image of Sakura began to blur, light from the fixture above the table smearing the edges of her face. Naruto felt her arm around his shoulders again, holding him tightly and trying to keep the room from shaking. Her bangs brushed across his cheek, strands of hair sticking to warm skin. He closed his eyes but couldn’t relax in the comfort Sakura was willing to give.

“You’ve been working yourself too hard. That’s why you’re like this.” Sakura said softly. “You really do need to let yourself rest.”

Naruto stilled at the sharp pain on the side of his neck. He turned to look at Sakura with wide eyes, but they became too heavy to keep open, and he felt himself losing consciousness when he heard the apology she whispered in his ear.

...

The absence of arm guards made Sasuke’s skin itch, like the tightness of the thick material pulled over his palm and taut in between his thumb and index finger. The strap of his bag dragged over his arm, down the sleeve of his shirt as Sasuke began to remove the bag from his back. He set it on the ground, at the foot of the tree that would serve as the base for his makeshift camp.

It was already dusk. Night was creeping forward, stalled by remnants of light still flittering through the canopy of the forest, and Sasuke let his body fall against the tree, slowly sliding down the length of the trunk. He was making good time. He was less than half a day away from Konoha and could make it home well before dawn, probably by midnight if he pushed himself to maintain the pace he’d been going. He wasn’t going to stay long. At most, he’d give himself a couple of hours to rest. He’d been careless, depriving himself of sleep the night before because he’d been too engrossed in a book he hadn’t been able to finish, but the stress of the last week had finally caught up with him.

Stretching out his legs, Sasuke wriggled his toes, scrunching his nose at the feel of dirt between them.

His stay in Kusagakure hadn’t been counterproductive but neither had the opportunity given him better access to information about the scroll as he’d hoped it would.

It’d only taken a little under three days to reach the village. The first two days Sasuke spent travelling against a monotonous backdrop, manoeuvring his way through the continuous line of trees that receded in his peripheral. The region hadn’t changed much from what he could remember. But as Sasuke came closer to Kusagakure, the nondescript display of scenery gradually gave way to a stream that had hit Sasuke with a haunting familiarity.

There was nothing about the stream that had made it appear unusual. It’d been unimpressive, a narrow channel of murky water with an intermittent flow struggling against the debris it could no longer carry. The stream was a glorified trickle of mud and a shadow of the erosive force needed to create the ravine it had formed.

Small clusters of trees were on either side of the stream, noticeably larger than the ones Sasuke had passed. The trees were broad masses that towered over him, rooted in rich soil and surrounded by bright foliage scattered among the grass. Their bare branches extended over the width of the stream, alluding to the thick trunks hunched forward without bowing to the influence of the sloped ground.

The sight had reminded Sasuke of a place he could envision with such a sharp and sudden clarity, somewhere that shouldn’t have existed outside of the story woven by the lines and curves drawn by his own hand. Nothing short of overwhelming, the awareness had made him feel frighteningly young, triggering a recognition he couldn’t explain, it was almost as if he’d fallen into the vestiges of a world inspired by what Setsu had imagined through his grandmother’s tales. 

For a brief moment, Sasuke had even toyed with the notion that he would have been able to see his reflection in water once upon a time. He’d stared at the muddied stream, eerily soothed by the sound of water splashing against the smooth surface of the small pebbles trailing the bank of the stream, but quickly stepped away when he’d heard someone advancing toward him.

It was a young girl dressed in white shorts and a white long-sleeved shirt. She was wearing a forehead protector with a stylised grass emblem scribed on the metal plate. Her hair was tied in a messy bun, with strands as dark as Sasuke’s that matched her large eyes. Notably pale, her face was round but plain, and the top of her head barely reached his shoulder. She looked as though she couldn’t have been more than thirteen, although she hadn’t given Sasuke the chance to misjudge her by appearance.

Despite her height, she’d carried herself tall, guarded but not wary of approaching him. Hand hovering over the kunai resting by her hip, she’d demanded Sasuke state his name and purpose. Her tone was curt and deceptively low, far from the high-pitched voice Sasuke had been expecting, but he didn’t hesitate to respond in kind. Deliberately withholding his name, he’d introduced himself as a delegate of Konohagakure and handed her the sealed envelope Tsunade had given him.

She’d examined the envelope with a narrowed gaze, glancing over the characters on the front. She turned it over to study the red seal on the back but didn’t break it. Still mindful of Sasuke, she demanded again that Sasuke state his purpose, and Sasuke had relented under the threat of being apprehended as a trespasser. His answer was clipped, divulging no more than his task to deliver of scroll of Kusagakure formerly in the possession of Konohagakure, but she’d accepted with a small nod.

Eyes crinkled with cautious amusement, she’d given the envelope back to Sasuke and addressed him by his full name.

Sasuke had been careful not to show his unease. A slight shift in his stance was the only sign he’d acknowledged the mention of his name. He’d only been told Kusagakure would be expecting a representative from Konoha to deliver the scroll. His apparel hadn’t suggested anything else. As far as he was aware, Kusagakure hadn’t known to expect him specifically, and he wasn’t convinced his face preceded the reputation of his name. Sasuke wasn’t sure what connotations her prior knowledge of him held and had been apprehensive of how it would affect carrying out his mission as well as his ability to obtain information about the scroll.

He’d anticipated hostility, for both his name and as an envoy of Konoha. However, despite the strained relationship between their villages, his association with Konoha had been something she hadn’t called attention to, and his name had meant no more to her than hers did to him. Seiko, she’d told him to call her, refraining from disclosing a family name. She was an intermediary sent ahead to intercept him and would be an armed chaperone of sorts, which placed Sasuke under her responsibility for the duration of his visit.

Not one to prolong the lack of conversation, Seiko made a swift motion with two fingers, in the direction east of where she had come from. She gestured for Sasuke to follow her and took off without warning.

Seiko was fast. Being agile himself, Sasuke didn’t have trouble keeping up with her but grew irritated trying to navigate the confined path she’d chosen to take. They made the rest of the way to Kusagakure on the ground, running through a long and tapering tunnel of bamboo that appeared too thin and brittle to retain their contours. Less light had begun to penetrate the further they went along and dimmed Sasuke’s ability to see. The ground became uneven, plagued by holes disguised by soft mounds of dirt and littered with jagged little rocks that had almost caused Sasuke to lose his footing.

Nearing the end of the tunnel, they were met with a deep valley shrouded in fog. Seiko came to a halt, and Sasuke stood beside her, inhaling at the view before him. The fog had generated a palpable moisture, tinting the wide range of mountains in the far distance. In the foreground was an open plain. Grass squelched beneath Sasuke’s sandals, blades damp and too green for the time of year. At the fringes of the plain, the grass was growing at a steep incline that levelled out into a meadow, above which, sitting on top of a hill on the other side of the valley, Sasuke could see the raised gates of Kusagakure.

Seiko gave Sasuke a quick glance and ran toward the meadow at the bottom, not looking back to see if Sasuke was following her.

At first glance, Kusagakure had been noticeably smaller than Konoha. Although neither as industrialised nor as densely populated, it had a comparatively higher ratio of ninja to civilians, an area where Konoha had been faltering recently. Its habitants kept mostly to themselves, with a few people poking their heads out of buildings to glimpse at Seiko guiding Sasuke through the otherwise barren streets. 

The scars from the invasion by Iwagakure still lingered. Due to Kusagakure’s location, it easily served as a front between Konoha and its enemies and could provide a strategic advantage for anyone who gained a foothold. Kusagakure’s alliance with Konoha had caused its people to suffer heavy causalities, and they’d taken the brunt of the Konoha’s fight against Iwagakure.

Recuperating from an attack that nearly destroyed them, the people of Kusagakure had rebuilt themselves as a neutral society. Two decades later, they continued working to live in relative seclusion. As a result, their relations with Konoha bordered on nonexistent.

They preferred to steer clear from the large scaled affairs of the shinobi world. When Orochimaru was reported to have a hideout in their land, they’d staged little resistance, yet neither did they interfere with Konoha’s attempt to capture him. It’d been indicative of their current diplomatic policies, mainly consisting of self-imposed isolation, hence why even something as seemingly inconsequential as Sasuke delivering the scroll had the potential for Konoha to reaffirm ties with them. But there was an unrest growing among many of more influential ninja villages, a tacit battle for power not even Kusagakure could escape, and a partnership could tilt the scales in Konoha’s favour in the preparation for the possibility of an oncoming war.

It was what Sasuke believed when he’d accepted the mission. Kusagakure welcoming someone from Konoha into their village held some kind of significance, of that much he was certain. At any rate, Sasuke hadn’t been eager to place any more importance on returning a relic that rightfully belonged to Kusagakure. Now he couldn’t help but feel the mission was a ruse to ridicule him and underline just how far he’d fallen.

But aside from Seiko, Sasuke hadn’t actually interacted with anyone in the village. She’d taken an active interest in staring at him. Since there hadn’t been any physical attraction on her part, from what he could tell, or any attempts at small talk, it hadn’t bothered him per se, but her constant attentiveness had been grating. He hadn’t expected less from someone assigned to follow his every move, yet there’d been something about the way Seiko looked at him, something almost ubiquitous about the faint smile in her eyes that never reached her mouth.

It’d been frustrating, but what made it particularly unnerving was the disinterest shared by the rest of village, which had seemingly chosen to disregard him completely. Sasuke wouldn’t pride himself on his social skills, in contrast to his desire not to better them, but his presence had virtually been ignored while Seiko carted him along like some kid who couldn’t be trusted not to wander off.

Sasuke walked beside Seiko without complaint, complying because he hadn’t been in a position to protest, but he’d been annoyed at having to slow his steps to keep up with her less than brisk pace, and it’d taken a little over twenty minutes to go from one side of the village to the other. Eventually, she led Sasuke to a seemingly vacant inn, where he’d been told to wait until an official came by to collect the scroll. She wasn’t generous in relaying when the official would come but suggested that Sasuke get a room in the meantime if he planned on staying the night.

It was an odd way of doing things, maybe even a little drastic for something like passing along a scroll if bringing Sasuke to the inn was an attempt to cut him off from the rest of the Kusagakure. Sasuke knew better than to openly question the unorthodox methods, although it would have been more pragmatic to wait for an official somewhere closer to the entrance. But considering Seiko had already walked Sasuke through the village, he doubted segregating him had been the case.

After paying for a room, Sasuke waited with Seiko at a table in the empty bar. The wait hadn’t been long, but when the official came, the exchange had been brief. The official wasn’t an imposing character, a man dressed in drab attire with a bunched frame that belittled a more impressive height. He hadn’t bothered to introduce himself and refused to make eye contact with Sasuke. If he was being snubbed, Sasuke didn’t know, but Seiko had told him to be silent beforehand, and Sasuke straightened in his chair while she spoke on his behalf.

The conversation lasted a few minutes, but they’d spoken over him, remembering Sasuke only when Seiko insisted Sasuke get the scroll out of his bag. He handed her the scroll, and she gave it to the official, who in turn produced an untitled book that had immediately caught Sasuke’s attention.

With a slight nod of her head, Seiko thanked Sasuke for bringing the scroll and placed the book in front of him. As a token of Kusagakure’s gratitude, the book was Sasuke’s to do with as he pleased. It was an old book, thin and stab bound with the cover veiled in a fine layer of dust that had yet to be disturbed.

When Sasuke asked what it was, Seiko had only informed him that she would escort him out of the village in the morning and then followed the official out of the inn.

Three hours later found Sasuke huddled next to a candle. The flickering light kept him awake while he took occasional sips from a bowl of cold soup, an assortment of mushrooms floating in a clear broth and part of the meal one of the inn’s attendees had brought to his room. He’d been hesitant at first, anxious about the book with no title. Seiko had given it to him. Not to Konoha, she’d presented the book to Sasuke. She’d emphasised his name, and there’d been a morbid curiosity at the distinction. It was tangled with a sense of dread, avid and hurried, that made Sasuke throw precaution out the window.

He opened the book to the first page, bare and discoloured. Carefully, he began to turn to the next one. He was almost afraid of tearing it, of tugging harshly at the tattered edges, but his hand trembled at the thought of what was written on the pages hiding behind it.

Sasuke hadn’t wanted to believe it, but it was there. Impossible but still there, what he’d already committed to memory, the unfinished tale of the boy who chased fireflies, the story trapped in the notebook he’d left at home with Naruto because Sasuke didn’t want to think about how Naruto knowing what was in the scroll had chipped away at Sasuke’s feigned indifference about Hotaru’s disappearance.

Negating the stipulations of his mission, Sasuke had thought of the scroll as his. More importantly, it was something that didn’t have to pertain to Naruto. He’d been at odds with himself, wanting to discuss the scroll that heavily involved Naruto and not wanting Naruto to know about Hotaru’s correlation with Setsu’s story. Sasuke hadn’t had much of a choice, but there’d been a bracing satisfaction in simply knowing some semblance of one was there.

Scrutinising the scroll had driven Sasuke from a single-minded determination to the verge of obsession. It tinged his thoughts, impaired his sensibility, searching for anything that would explain why he found it so increasingly easy to believe unravelling the scroll had somehow caused Hotaru to appear. It was the one connection he had with Hotaru that Naruto didn’t have. It was Sasuke’s alone and one of the few aspects of his life not dominated by Naruto because even Hotaru, Hotaru who had sought out Sasuke, Hotaru who Sasuke had become impossibly close to in the span of a few days, smiled like Naruto, laughed like Naruto, dressed like Naruto—was so damn much like Naruto—and the reminder had been a constant bitterness that continued to twist the knots in Sasuke’s stomach because it was just another thing Naruto couldn’t let him have.

Every crack and crevice in his life, it was only a matter of time before Naruto seeped into them all, but the book suddenly heavy Sasuke’s lap, although he came to Kusagakure to learn more about the scroll, this book shouldn’t have been there. The recalled childhood of Setsu’s grandmother, the fabricated history of demons and humans, Setsu’s meeting with Sankoku, the fable Sasuke had come to know almost verbatim in someone else’s handwriting, none of it should have been there. Yet Sasuke traced the faded characters on the page, the slight rise of the dark ink reading Setsu’s name, and it felt all too real beneath his fingertips.

Compared to characters on the scroll, the book was written in a contemporary dialect. And, unlike what Sasuke had been able to translate, this version was a more detailed narrative. There were portions of Setsu’s journey new to Sasuke, extending beyond the scroll’s four day account of Setsu’s time in the forest, and he’d been gripped by an insatiable need to find the answers he’d been denied.

There wasn’t much variation between Sasuke’s translation and the book on Setsu’s first day in the forest. The second day, however, began a series of Setsu’s encounters with four demons that had been banished to the forest from Setsu’s village.

They were described as sprites, impish little creatures said to resemble the animal best suited to their nature. A snake, a frog, a turtle, and a pig, each one made consecutive appearances until the sixth day. They promised to guide Setsu home in exchange for the jar Setsu was using to catch the fireflies that guaranteed him safe passage through the forest. But Setsu had resisted the offers of the demons that had followed him. He continued to catch a firefly to place in the jar each night and wandered through the forest with a growing collection of their bodies in the jar during the day.

And, on the end of the sixth day, deep within the glades of the forest, Setsu met Sankoku again. 

But the Sankoku depicted in the book was a far cry from the Sankoku portrayed in the scroll. He observed Setsu with curious features that turned pleasant when he took notice of the jar of dead fireflies and the gauntness beginning to show on Setsu’s face.

In the scroll, Sasuke had picked out the allusions to Setsu running out of food, but the depth the book went into describing Setsu’s pangs had been wrenching, almost as chilling as the upturn of Sankoku’s lips as he told Setsu he’d come to collect his favour.

The slow upturn of Sankoku’s lips, Sankoku running a long nail down Setsu’s chest and tearing through clothes that were already ragged, the blood splattered over Sankoku’s face, the shattered glass planted into the ground, Setsu’s choked garbles and wasted pleas—Sasuke saw it when he thought of the thin book in his bag, remembered the single page he hadn’t read.

He could still see it when he closed his eyes. Far away from Kusagakure and so close to being home, so close to the place where he met Hotaru, Sasuke couldn’t get rid of the image of Setsu slumping on top of a small patch of yellow moss. The scene was cut off midsentence. The beginning of Sankoku’s withering smile stopped at the margin near the bottom left hand corner and continued on the last page, but Sasuke hadn’t turned it because he didn’t want to read it. He closed the book because he couldn’t read it.

And because he already had his ending, Sasuke didn’t need to read it.

...

A week had gone by since Hotaru disappeared. A week’s worth of Naruto waking up in the middle of the night; a week’s worth of expecting the pull of Hotaru tugging on his shirt so Naruto could walk him to the bathroom; a week’s worth of feeling the outline of chubby fingers roaming across his cheek; a week’s worth of waiting for a small arm to wrap around his neck; a week’s worth of waking up to see no one beside him.

Night after night and Naruto still didn’t have anything to show for it.

There was this unyielding sense of disappointment, this sense that he hadn’t done enough—wasn’t doing enough—and it had only continued to build as the days dragged on. He wouldn’t say he’d given up, not really, but Naruto couldn’t escape the prevailing feeling that Sasuke was right. This was something Naruto couldn’t fix. This was something Naruto couldn’t change. No matter how hard he had tried and how much he wanted to, this was something Naruto wouldn’t be able to make right, and he felt like he’d failed because of it.

To fail was incredibly finite. Failing signified an oversight. Being a failure was Naruto assuming responsibility, and asserting that he failed was Naruto admitting he’d been wrong. No matter how he chose to phrase it, this feeling that went beyond the scope of disappointment, it was amazing how easy it was. Too easy to come up with different ways to express the same word that sounded so damning in his head, but Naruto didn’t want to know what it was to say it out loud. Because to accept Hotaru truly wasn’t coming back meant that Naruto had to accept he didn’t get a chance to say goodbye.

A week ago, the last thing Naruto had been worried about was Hotaru being left alone with him. Or rather, Naruto had been worried about being left alone with Hotaru. His experience with kids Hotaru’s age was limited if not nonexistent, and although Hotaru had started to cling to Naruto by that point, the thought of taking care of someone so small, someone who’d essentially become dependent on him, especially without Sasuke there, had been scary.

It was more intimidating than Sasuke’s aggravated scowls the last time he reminded Naruto he wasn’t exactly giving Naruto a choice. If Naruto didn’t have anything else constructive to do while Sasuke was away, in particular the plethora of missions he hadn’t been assigned, Naruto could look after Hotaru. It wasn’t the most outright show of confidence, yet Naruto had taken assurance from the sarcasm all the same because it was Sasuke trying not to say he was relying on Naruto to take care of Hotaru. It was Sasuke being clumsy because he wasn’t good at that sort of thing. He wasn’t straightforward with what he wanted to say like Naruto, but Sasuke stumbling over his words meant more than Sasuke trying to be the kind of person he wasn’t.

However, when Naruto woke up this morning, that assurance had all but waned. The same understated confidence he’d taken from Sasuke, Naruto had fed into that assurance to make a promise he’d made prematurely. He didn’t want to think that Sasuke had given up on Hotaru and had focused his energy on proving Sasuke wrong. Naruto proving himself right was the same as finding Hotaru, and when Sasuke came back, Naruto wanted to make Sasuke see there had in fact been time to make a difference, and things weren’t as hopeless as Sasuke had made them out to be.

But it was Thursday. Tomorrow was the day Sasuke was coming back, and today Naruto found himself wandering aimlessly through the streets of Konoha. He’d followed the dirt path from the house and just started walking. He still had another hour until he was supposed to meet with Tsunade and was using the time to clear his head, going anywhere, nowhere. He wasn’t ready to face her yet. He was too busy trying to decide what he was going to say to Sasuke and knew any questions he had for Tsunade would fall apart before he could ask them.

The unforgiving sense of disappointment he’d associated with failure, if this was a consequence of wanting to bring Hotaru back, then Naruto was the self-fulfilling ass Sasuke had accused him of being.

A week hadn’t been enough.

After Sasuke left, Naruto spent the majority of the day unconscious thanks to Sakura, who had been convinced she needed to intervene on Naruto’s behalf. She’d moved Naruto to his room and left the house before Naruto opened his eyes in his bed a few hours later. Stomach growling, Naruto fought the grogginess that followed waking up and made his way to the kitchen. He hadn’t been in the mood to fix anything, although after nearly inhaling two bowls of stale rice topped with a few cold strips of beef, Naruto realised he hadn’t eaten anything solid in two days. Full but surprisingly still tired, he hauled himself to the bathroom for a quick shower, grabbed a shirt and a pair of boxers to put on after drying off, and plopped himself on the bed. He immediately fell back to sleep, holding a half-hearted grudge against Sakura for knocking him out that was forgotten by the time he saw her again the next morning.

A little before six, Sakura did something she hadn’t done since Naruto and Sasuke first moved into the house. She rang the doorbell. The fact someone had even used the doorbell was enough to throw Naruto off until he heard the more familiar banging on the door following the unusual show of courtesy. The knocks, though loud, were overpowered by Sakura telling Naruto to come out ready to leave because she’d given him ample time to get his act together.

Naruto had been up since five and was on his way out of the house when she came. He’d wanted to get an early start continuing his search for Hotaru and told her the day before he’d planned as much. If Sakura had come to pick up where their conversation about Hotaru left off, there wasn’t anything she could have said to talk Naruto out of going. However, he’d opened the door to see not only Sakura but Shikamaru, Ino, and Kiba, who’d brought Akamaru with him. Naruto met their faces with confusion, taking in their attire and the bags slung over their shoulders with the tilt of his head.

Understanding didn’t come until Sakura mentioned the note she’d left that Naruto had overlooked, the note on the kitchen counter reminding Naruto he had friends who weren’t letting him go out there to look for Hotaru alone.

One day had been good. They had their own lives, their own responsibilities. Although Naruto hadn’t insisted they’d put those aside for his own sake, there had been an earnest sort of comfort in seeing them, in knowing why they were there.

But despite their combined effort, a week still hadn’t been enough.

The second attempt had been more organised, though, less rushed on Naruto’s part. They’d planned ahead to avoid the frantic mess the original search had turned into when Naruto found Sasuke in the forest again, hours after he’d found Sasuke earlier that morning. Naruto had been antsy, snapping at anyone who asked him if he was all right. He hadn’t been all right and ended up making everyone uncomfortable around him because of it.

But Naruto couldn’t shake the sight of Sasuke unconscious, what it felt to see Sasuke so still. He couldn’t stop seeing it, even when Sasuke joined the search. His concentration had been divided between looking out for signs of Hotaru and periodically checking on Sasuke to make sure he was breathing and that Sasuke was really beside him. Naruto knew he hadn’t been in the most sensible state of mind, but there had been an irrational compulsion to make sure that Sasuke was _there_.

He’d needed Sakura’s intervention more than he cared to admit.

Following Sasuke’s departure, they’d lost a day with Naruto grounded. Shikamaru had been blunt in telling Naruto the odds of finding Hotaru were stacked against them. A day was a considerable amount of time they couldn’t reclaim but more so because they didn’t have anything about Hotaru to go on.

So they began with what little they did know. They’d gone back to recreating what happened the morning Hotaru disappeared. The only information they really had to go on was that Naruto had found Sasuke in a not far from the house, presumably where Sasuke had last seen Hotaru, but Sasuke still hadn’t been able to fill the blanks in his memory. Although Naruto had prodded Sasuke to remember, the more he pushed, the more agitated Sasuke had become, and Naruto quit in fear of increasing the distance already growing between them.

Kiba had pointed out that an attack on Sasuke was unlikely. None of the seals around Naruto and Sasuke’s house had been breached, which meant Sasuke had to have left on his own. The seals were the reason why so few people knew where he and Sasuke lived. They were a precaution, forming a barrier that also served as illusion to ensure their house was hidden and nearly impenetrable from anyone who wasn’t allowed access inside by either Naruto or Sasuke.

How Hotaru had gotten through it, Naruto couldn’t even begin to guess, but Ino had said it increased the likelihood of Sasuke having been provoked to leave the house, probably by Hotaru, who, with no evidence to prove otherwise, was the only person unaccounted for. If Hotaru had purposely led Sasuke outside, it was reasonable to think Sasuke would have followed him. Sasuke passed out alone and in the middle of the forest with no traces of Hotaru, she’d thought it was too suspicious not to take notice of Hotaru’s culpability completely. Naruto had wanted to say Hotaru wouldn’t do what Ino was implying, not with the way he’d acted towards Sasuke, but he didn’t want to acknowledge he honestly didn’t know enough about Hotaru to disagree.

The rest of the conversation brought them back to where they started, with nothing, and by dawn they’d shifted their location from the house to the village. Naruto had originally intended on going back to the forest to continue his search, but Sakura proposed asking around again before they left in case anyone had seen Hotaru within the last two days. She’d asked if Hotaru had the chance to use his camera, suggesting Hotaru would be easier to identify with pictures, and Naruto had never been so grateful for Sasuke and Hotaru making him go to the store that night.

Naruto had dropped off the film to get developed right after he walked Sasuke to the main gate and right before he’d run into Sakura on his way home. When he picked it up, he’d given out photos of Hotaru to take, and the five of them had split up to cover more ground. The plan was to regroup at Naruto’s house no later than noon and then extend the search to the outer edge of Fire Country for the next three days.

They’d retraced Hotaru’s steps in Konoha. Ransacked everywhere Naruto and Sasuke had taken Hotaru, places they hadn’t, weaving in and out of stores and sweeping through any space small enough for Hotaru to squeeze in, nearly turning the village upside in the process of questioning anyone they bumped into, but nobody could recall seeing a blond kid with blue eyes and the prominent marks on his cheeks so reminiscent of Naruto.

It shouldn’t have been hard to find someone who’d remembered Hotaru. When Naruto and Sasuke had taken Hotaru shopping, it hadn’t bothered Naruto then, aside from bringing more attention than he was used to getting, but the stares they’d been on the receiving end of weren’t something they could avoid. He couldn’t deny how much the three of them had stood out. But of all the people he, Sakura, Kiba, Shikamaru, and Ino had come across, some of them they had questioned a second time, no one had remembered Hotaru.

Not even the stingy bakery owner who had personally given Hotaru a free sample recognised him in the picture Naruto had shown her. It’d been less than two weeks, so how could she have no problem remembering Naruto and Sasuke coming in that day but not Hotaru? Or, if she couldn’t place seeing Hotaru with them, how could she not remember giving away a slice of cake when she rarely if ever gave away her any of her food?

Naruto had known he wasn’t going crazy. There were at least four people who could attest his sanity. Unless they had all gone crazy, too, which Naruto thought highly unlikely since Sakura, Kiba, Shikamaru, and Ino were just as confused as he was, either everyone they questioned had been lying or Hotaru had somehow become a figment of their imaginations. But it wasn’t like the villagers had any reason not to be honest, none that Naruto could think of.

Although yesterday, going crazy had become an alternative Naruto would have been more than willing to take. On their way back to Konoha, still no luck with finding Hotaru after their short stint in the forest, Ino had asked to look at the photo she’d seen Naruto carrying. It was different from one of the prints he’d given to Ino or had allowed anyone else to see. The photo was something he’d kept for himself, and Naruto had been hesitant to share it. 

Instead of Ino’s photo of Hotaru standing alone, squinting at camera and getting ready for the flash, it showed Hotaru looking down at Sasuke. Hotaru was sulking, his mouth set in a frown, and Sasuke was fighting not to smile. One of the last pictures they took from that night, Naruto had taken it right after Hotaru, in his attempt to escape Naruto, had tackled Sasuke on the bed and told Sasuke he didn’t want to be tickled by Naruto anymore.

Opening his hand, Naruto stopped, and the rest of the group followed suit. When he let Ino see the photo, she didn’t say anything about the nature of it, which he appreciated, but she did admit Hotaru looked strange with blond hair. Though, she’d also admitted she had trouble picturing Hotaru with black hair, too. Shikamaru, motivated by Ino’s observations to closely re-examine his own photo, then confessed that with no active regard for the features Hotaru shared with Naruto and Sasuke, it was difficult for him to recognise Hotaru.

Shikamaru also admitted he was confused by his own explanation. Ino claimed Shikamaru had put into words how she felt but then said she didn’t understand it, either. If Hotaru looked so much like Naruto and Sasuke, why was the image, or maybe the idea, Shikamaru later suggested, of Hotaru so hard to take in?

Naruto had asked whether or not they remembered preparing for Hotaru’s spur-of-the-moment surprise party. While Ino and Shikamaru both remembered buying supplies and decorating Naruto and Sasuke’s living room, they fumbled trying to consciously connect their actions with the fact that they’d been doing it for Hotaru.

Nervous, Naruto had looked to Kiba and Sakura to ask if either of them was experiencing the same phenomenon. Kiba shook his head and said no, adding that he clearly remembered the face of the kid who kicked him in the shin. Sakura narrowed her eyes and asked to look at the photo Ino had wanted to see. Naruto didn’t know what to make of tightness around her mouth when he handed it to her. She’d said nothing appeared unfamiliar about Hotaru, but Naruto thought it looked more like Sakura had been embedding the picture in her mind, outwardly passing it off as a simple glance. As she gave the photo back to Naruto, she urged the group to keep going.

They continued walking without looking at one another, too unsettled to say anything, but it hadn’t taken long for Naruto to get tired of the oppressive silence even he didn’t want to break. He placed himself ahead of the group and spent the rest of the way home trying to rack up an answer, anything he could think of to keep his mind from how the photo of Sasuke and Hotaru crumpled in his hand.

It was only a matter of time before what was happening to Shikamaru and Ino, what had happened to most of the people who’d come in contact with Hotaru, would happen to Kiba and Sakura, too. But these weren’t random cases of selective amnesia. This was something beyond Naruto’s power of comprehension. Other than things like clothes and toys, confirming Hotaru had been living with Naruto and Sasuke, the developing pattern of simultaneous memory loss suggested Hotaru had never existed.

The more Naruto looked into the incident surrounding Hotaru, the less he seemed to understand and the further away he was taken from the possibility of finding any answers. Of course, Naruto had already established there was a relationship between Hotaru and the scroll Sasuke was given. That was his best bet. It was his only bet. But, not being able to make out what part Sasuke played in all of this, there wasn’t much Naruto could do aside from grasping at his own conclusions.

As much as he didn’t want to think about it, Naruto had to consider being affected by Hotaru’s disappearance. Notwithstanding Hotaru’s things at home, how long would it take for him to start forgetting? And if Sasuke had an idea of what was recently brought to Naruto’s attention, which Naruto assumed he did, was Sasuke counting down to when he would start forgetting, too?

Or had Sasuke already started to forget and had simply chosen not to tell Naruto?

“Naruto-kun!”

Naruto stopped and turned at the voice, a readily forced smile on his face when he saw it was Lee approaching him. “Hey, I didn’t know you were coming back today, Fuzzy-brows.”

Lee nodded and broke out into a grin at the nickname Naruto hadn’t abandoned. “I returned with Aritomo-san and Saigo-san last night. I wanted to visit you then, but it was already too late. I did not wish to disturb you considering you had just returned to Konoha, as well.” 

Naruto made a dismissive wave with his hand. “You wouldn’t have bothered me.” 

“Yes, but I spoke with Sakura-san this morning, and she said you had been tired all week—yesterday, especially,” Lee said. “I had intended to see you afterward. However, when Sakura-san accompanied me to your house, we discovered you were not home. I was concerned, I admit, because of what Sakura-san told me earlier. She did assure me you were all right, although I am glad to have run into you.”

“You talked to Sakura-chan, huh,” Naruto said softly, almost to himself. Licking his lips, he raised his voice and asked, “Did she tell you about…?” 

All traces of excitement fell from Lee’s face. He looked at Naruto with uncertainty, tentatively reaching for a response. “I was looking forward to finally meeting Hotaru-san. Sakura-san told me you and Sasuke-san seemed so happy, and I wanted to congratulate the two of you on your newly found relationship with Hotaru-san, but…”

Naruto placed his thumbs in the front pockets of his pants and rocked back on his heels. Lee loved kids, and he would have loved Hotaru. Naruto could imagine Hotaru going cross-eyed and saying something inappropriate about Lee’s eyebrows, something Naruto would have said or probably did say when he was younger, but Naruto stopped himself when the thought reinforced the reality that Hotaru wasn’t there.

“It’s okay.”

Lee shook his head and clapped Naruto on the shoulder. “I am not sure what happened, barring what I have learned through Sakura-san. But if there is anything I can do, for either you or Sasuke-san, please do not hesitate to let me know.”

“I…”

It was such a natural gesture, so honestly Lee that Naruto felt guilty because he’d been so ready to feed into the idea of Lee reacting any other way.

Between trying to find Hotaru and worrying about Sasuke, the last few days had taken its toll on Naruto. There was that tug again, that unwelcome pull urging Naruto toward the choice he refused to make. As long as he was waiting for Sasuke, he was looking for Hotaru, but despite Naruto’s attempts to keep how torn he was feeling to himself, his resolve not to talk about it had revealed more than he wanted to tell.

It shouldn’t have been an option. It wasn’t an option. But the division between Sasuke and Hotaru was there. It was in the back of his mind, and Naruto was straining with a decision no one else could respond to. For all Naruto knew, with the way things were going, maybe they weren’t able to, but the thought of completely forgetting Hotaru, carrying on like Hotaru had never been there—Naruto didn’t want it to come to that. He didn’t want those memories he’d made with Sasuke to mean nothing.

It’d been difficult to listen to Kiba’s hasty apologies. They didn’t do anything to ease the prickling in Naruto’s chest, but short of managing to find Hotaru, there wasn’t much else Kiba could do. At the very least, Shikamaru and Ino had talked around the subject of Hotaru. They were both conscious of how neither of them being able to remember Hotaru had affected Naruto.

Sakura had tried to sympathise with Naruto, tried to help him make the best of the situation. And while Naruto didn’t think it was unintentional, she’d come across as detached. Iruka had seemed caught between giving Naruto what comfort he could and more or less hinting it was something that couldn’t be helped. Kakashi, although he’d been more attentive of Sasuke than usual last week, had only said he trusted Naruto and Sasuke would find a way to make things work out. But Naruto wasn’t sure how to interpret it because Kakashi had said the same thing that day when he and Iruka came over to see Hotaru.

And Tsunade…

Naruto was hoping to find out what she had to say about it soon enough.

Reasonably, Naruto wanted to think, he’d been upset at first. Then again, he didn’t fault them for their reactions. They all understood the concept of loss. In this case, though, there was also a certain disconnect because their memories of Hotaru were admittedly vague. They preferred to skirt the issue altogether, and it was hard for Naruto to say what he would have done if he was put in the same position. But he had their unconditional support. That was the most they could give. That was the most Naruto could ask for.

And from someone like Lee, who hadn’t even been here, the look in his eyes was so sincere it hurt. If Lee could remember Hotaru, was still able to feel something for this person he’d never met but everyone else was gradually forgetting, then Naruto could be greedy and hold on to this obscure piece of hope that meant he and Sasuke didn’t have to forget Hotaru, either.

“Thank you for that. Really.” Naruto gave Lee a small but genuine smile, the most he’d been able to dredge up all week. “You’re a good friend, Lee. And I—I don’t think that’s something I say as much as I should.”

Lee removed his hand from Naruto’s shoulder but kept his gaze firm. “If there is anything either of you need, I mean it.”

Looking away briefly, Naruto covered his mouth and cleared his throat. “So, um, how’d your mission go?”

“Not so well, I am afraid.” Lee frowned. “The long journey home was fortunately uneventful, but we did not have the most welcoming news to give Hokage-sama during our mission debriefing. The treaty with Iwagakure is not proceeding as well as we had initially anticipated. Perhaps it is due to the current negotiations with Kusagakure, but if we are not able to secure a presence in Earth Country within the next year or so…”

Naruto scratched the back of his neck. “Yeah, that kind of news is becoming the standard these days, isn’t it? I try not to think about it all the time, though. I don’t want to get stuck wondering if it’s only going to get worse, you know.”

Seeing Lee’s expression growing pensive, Naruto said firmly, “But you did what you could. That’s all you _can_ do. More importantly, it’s really good to have you back. It was getting too quiet without you around,” he joked.

“Likewise, the quiet becomes stifling when I am not home.” Another smile slowly crept back onto Lee’s face. “But I am filled with a relief I have not experienced in a long time, Naruto-kun. A very long time.”

“It’s been what? Almost six months since you’ve been gone?”

“Nearly half a year.”

“If I’d known you were coming back today, I would have thrown a party to celebrate.”

“Actually, I am on my way to meet Gai-sensei. He generously offered to treat me to lunch, but if you would like to come…?”

“Not trying to be rude or turn you down, but do you mind if we finish catching up tomorrow? I need to run a couple of errands before Sasuke gets back.”

“According to Sakura-san, Sasuke-san should be returning tomorrow, right? I am looking forward to seeing him again, as well.”

“He’ll probably show up sometime in the morning, I bet.”

“Is that not…?”

“No, no—it’s just that I waited until the last minute to do what I’m supposed to do, and I’m trying to hurry and make sure I get everything done around the house before Sasuke comes back. You know how he gets.”

“Yes, I do understand how...animated Sasuke-san becomes on occasion. Is there anything I can help with?”

“Nah. Go ahead and relax while you can before someone decides to send you back out again.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.” Naruto gave a wryly smile. “I just have a few loose ends to tie up.”

...

Sasuke crouched on a branch of the tree directly above his temporary resting site. Berating himself for reaching to unsheathe the sword he didn’t have, he quickly drew one of the kunai from the holster strapped to his thigh and raised it level with his neck.

Since the sun had already set, Sasuke could take advantage of the lack of light. Until he could determine the source of the sudden spike in chakra, the best course of action would be to lie in wait. This was the first person he’d come across outside of boundaries of Kusagakure in the six days he’d been travelling. The most he could expect was that whoever it was would pass without knowing he was there. Throughout the course of the mission, he’d been averse to initiating any unnecessary encounters and wasn’t in a rush to do otherwise.

He’d long ago made it a habit to mask his chakra and did it subconsciously, the meagre amount he did have access to. He’d been taking the most indirect route between Konoha and Kusagakure, and although weren’t many people who regularly made trips between the two villages, it didn’t mean Sasuke wanted to entertain the risk of alerting anyone to his whereabouts. He’d been moving quickly, staying no longer than a couple of hours in one location the few times he stopped to take a break. He hadn’t even bothered with making fires. The weather was somewhat warm during the day despite the cooler nights, and the sleeping bag he brought did more than enough to suffice. 

Whoever it was trying to follow him was only minutes away. The chakra signature wasn’t one Sasuke immediately recognised, but it wasn’t faint, either, meaning it was someone not bothering to hide where they were. As brash as it was to travel so openly, practically demanding to be found, it raised the question of why this person was doing it. Yet, taking into account the source was coming from the direction of Konoha, Sasuke couldn’t find it in himself to believe the reveal wasn’t a deliberate attempt to catch his attention.

There was a flicker of movement, preceding the rustling of leaves and branches in a tree no less than thirty metres from him. It seemed like the person knew Sasuke was in the general vicinity, if not exactly where; however, he wasn’t willing to give away his position so soon. But making that much noise with no visible intent to suppress it, even if he was being sought out, Sasuke frowned when he recognised who had caused it.

It was Kakashi—or at least the silhouette looked like Kakashi. But Sasuke maintained his defensive stance and tightened his grip on the handle of his kunai, opting to err on the side of caution.

Of course, presuming it was Kakashi, that meant the Council had most likely insisted on sending someone to follow him. It defeated the purpose of the mission, which, Sasuke had been told by the Council at the time he accepted, was to assess his loyalty to the village, but Sasuke couldn’t say he was surprised. Therein laid the issue of trust, or lack thereof placed in him, that continued to push Sasuke past the point of caring. In regards to their collective opinion of him, the handful of elders consisting of the Council made Sasuke’s relationship with Tsunade actually look amicable.

He just didn’t expect Kakashi to be the one the Council obliged to do it.

But, if those were the circumstances, why hadn’t Sasuke run into Kakashi before? And why would the Council send Kakashi out of his way to meet him now when Sasuke was less than a day away from Konoha?

Sasuke stilled when Kakashi jumped to the tree across from him. After a pause, Kakashi stood slowly with one hand placed on the trunk, leaning the majority of his weight against it. The red in his left eye was visible even in the dark and vanished when Kakashi pulled his forehead protector over it.

Gritting his teeth, Sasuke stood and withdrew his kunai, slipping it back into the holster.

Kakashi gave a half-hearted salute. “Yo.” 

Apparently, Kakashi left behind the more solemn attitude Sasuke had last seen him with and reverted to the usual personality Sasuke wasn’t fond of.

“Did someone send you to follow me all the way to Kusagakure or are you just imposing to make sure I come back?”

“What about neither—is that an acceptable answer for you?” 

It wasn’t. That was a given they both knew and Sasuke didn’t need to say.

Kakashi making another jump to land beside him, Sasuke fought hard against the inclination to strike. He wasn’t prepared for this, had in fact been avoiding it, and was more than appreciative Kakashi hadn’t tried to corner him when Hotaru disappeared. It never failed to irk him. With any opportunity, Kakashi instigated pointless discussions to push Sasuke toward the kind of contemplation he had no desire to indulge in.

And damn it if Sasuke didn’t fall for it every time.

Kakashi raised his gaze towards Sasuke. He stared at Sasuke’s profile, watching Sasuke almost as closely as Naruto did during those odd spells when Naruto lost his typical flamboyance and made Sasuke feel unduly exposed at the sight of his reflection in Naruto’s eyes. But, unlike Naruto, Kakashi wasn’t devoted to learning every facet of Sasuke’s character.

Since Sasuke’s return to Konoha, a delicate ambience had developed between them. It was a mutual understanding that presented Kakashi with a knack for getting under Sasuke’s skin and Sasuke with a hindering tolerance for Kakashi’s antagonistic behaviour.

Although he thought them to be flawed, Sasuke could accept the intentions weren’t bad on Kakashi’s part. Most of Sasuke’s initial frustration with Kakashi was due to reluctance and quickly curtailed to annoyance. Lately, however, Kakashi’s light prodding had taken a more discriminating turn. What began as minor annoyance became genuine anger that hadn’t readily subsided, and it didn’t take much for Sasuke to figure out what the catalyst was.

Kakashi lowered himself to sit on the branch while Sasuke still stood. “I’m assuming that means no.” 

Kakashi had yet to look away, but Sasuke remained tight-lipped and continued to face forward. Irritated with himself, Sasuke knew Kakashi probably picked up on his show of discomfort—like Kakashi did the day he came to the house to meet Hotaru for the first time. But without Naruto and Iruka acting as buffers, Kakashi’s calculating expression was more blatant, more aggressive. It was as if Kakashi was waiting for Sasuke to crack beneath Kakashi’s veneer of concern, in the meantime trying to project onto Sasuke his expectations of how much Hotaru’s disappearance had affected Sasuke. What those expectations were, Sasuke could hazard a guess.

It was safer for Kakashi to believe the worst of Sasuke, to consider the possibility of Sasuke defecting from Konoha when he’d done it before. Considering the general mentality of the village had yet again played a pivotal role in ostracising him, in light of his own liability, Sasuke didn’t blame Kakashi. With his history, it really wasn’t much of a stretch to assume Sasuke didn’t have the emotional capacity to handle something as unexpected as Hotaru.

Hotaru was abruptly thrown into Sasuke and Naruto’s lives, just as quickly taken away, but Sasuke had already given up too much of his life wallowing in an anger that had ultimately worked against him. And although it hadn’t been his original intention to ever return to Konoha after leaving, much less alive, he’d continued to stay on his own volition and wasn’t going to incriminate himself for other people’s satisfaction. His humiliation at being treated like a pawn, wrestling against the people in the village who knowingly held power over him, it was a gamble Sasuke couldn’t win. And despite how easily the contours of Hotaru’s face kept slipping from his memory, Sasuke continued to scrape at the images of home that lessened the ambiguity of Hotaru’s existence and made it something concrete.

The invisible stars and moon Sasuke could map out in his head, the simple pictures drawn with black marker that Naruto and Hotaru scrubbed from the wall in the foyer; Hotaru’s green toothbrush, sharing the holder with Sasuke and Naruto’s blue and yellow ones; the plastic turtle Sakura gave Hotaru, sitting on the edge of the bathroom sink, right next to the blue soap that once took the shape of a flower; the small, brightly coloured pyjamas already wrinkled, squished in Naruto’s underwear drawer where Hotaru had put them—because he could preserve those images, constantly replay in his mind those snippets representing a time seemingly so long ago, it was enough to sustain Sasuke until tomorrow, until he was home.

It was enough that Sasuke wouldn’t forget.

“Unless I’m being detained and you’re being held accountable for me,” Sasuke said, narrowing his eyes at Kakashi, “there’s no reason for you to be here.”

“I’m offering my company.”

“I don’t want your company.”

“Oh.” Kakashi’s mouth was drawn into a contrived smile that soon slipped from the mask hiding his face. “That’s a shame.”

“Why were you looking for me, Kakashi?”

“I wanted to.”

Scoffing, Sasuke sat on the branch. Positioning his back against the trunk of the tree, he let one leg hang freely and brought the other close to his chest, wrapping an arm around his knee. “You’re avoiding the question.” 

“I gave you an answer. Just not the one you wanted to hear.”

“You find a justification for everything, don’t you?”

Raising his head, Kakashi gave a wistful sigh, and Sasuke closed his eyes, feigning not to hear the softly spoken not always from Kakashi. “Amazing how you can still see even when everything’s so much darker with an empty sky. It’s interesting, don’t you think?”

Sasuke shrugged, finding nothing appealing about pointing out the obvious.

“Ever heard of that old saying,” Kakashi asked, “the one about the stars?”

“If it’s something you made up, probably not, but…” Sasuke began, carefully choosing his next words, “people say a lot of things about stars.”

Kakashi shifted next to him, moving close enough that Sasuke could feel the warmth from Kakashi’s body. A slight breeze made the leaves above them shudder, but Sasuke failed to suppress an involuntarily shiver when the cool air hit his skin, and his mind wandered to the sleeping bag tucked inside of his bag.

“Specifically, I’m referring to the saying my grandmother once told me,” Kakashi said. “Will that make a difference?”

“It doesn’t matter to me.”

“You say that now.”

“I’ll say it later, too.”

“You may. You may not. I’d argue the uncertainty of knowing the future, although I suppose that’s a moot point with you. Either way, do know this, Sasuke. Even if you can’t see the stars tonight, it doesn’t mean they were never there.”

Not trusting himself to speak, Sasuke swallowed, trying to keep at bay the burning sensation rising in the back of his throat.

The seconds passed slowly, encroaching upon the silence like minutes until Kakashi spoke again. “I think the saying goes along the lines of something like that,” he said absently. “You should give it some thought when you wake up.”

Startled, Sasuke opened his eyes. He was on the ground again, propped by the tree he’d fallen asleep against. Ignoring the slight pain in his lower back, Sasuke blindly reached for his bag, not waiting for his pupils to adjust to the dark. He took out his sleeping bag and spread it on the ground, settling himself inside and shutting his eyes as he tried to stifle the all too real impression of his conversation with Kakashi.

...

It wouldn’t take much for Naruto to confess he’d been putting off this confrontation. He’d hid behind excuse after excuse, telling himself waiting until the end of the week wouldn’t hurt in spite of feeling the opposite. It was only because he’d run out of excuses that Naruto was able to step foot in Tsunade’s office again.

His last visit began with a one-sided conversation that consisted of Tsunade threatening to suspend him from future missions if he stepped outside of Konoha that day and ended with her subsequently throwing Naruto out in the hall. It wasn’t the first time she’d threatened Naruto and kicked him out of her office, but she hadn’t done it recently. Not within the last three or four years and not unless she’d lost her composure, which was rare considering Tsunade was a relatively collected person who liked to be in control of how people saw her.

She’d been as anxious to speak to Naruto as she was to get him out, cagey in a way that had definitely grabbed his attention and Sasuke’s, too. But Naruto still couldn’t wrap his head around why Tsunade had been so set on him not leaving the village until the day after Sasuke left. She couldn’t have been worried about Naruto burning out, not when she gave Sasuke the okay after Sasuke had spent a considerable chunk of the day before unconscious. So what difference would it have made if Naruto had left?

He knew he should have asked then, should have gone back to Tsunade’s office after he’d seen Sasuke off when every single one of Tsunade’s actions had pointed to something being wrong. Instead, Naruto had gone home. Too tired to be productive, too alert to fall asleep, Naruto had mulled over Tsunade’s final words to dissuade Naruto from looking for Hotaru. Even if Konoha had the resources to exhaust, she wouldn’t have wasted them helping Naruto pursue a hapless cause. It was true Konoha wasn’t the formidable force it used to be, but the exaggerated reminder didn’t take away from Naruto’s anger at what Tsunade had said. He’d let himself stew in it. Her careless attitude had done more than rile him. Until he’d been able to get a handle of the situation, Naruto had been hesitant to approach her again. 

He’d tried talking to Kakashi about it, what about Hotaru that Tsunade wasn’t telling Naruto. Since Kakashi had given the scroll to Sasuke, it seemed likely he knew something. At any rate, Kakashi probably knew more than Naruto and at least as much as Sasuke, if not more. Naruto hadn’t been able to get anything out of him, though. Kakashi had ignored any attempts Naruto made to introduce the subject of the scroll or the lack of recognition where Hotaru was concerned. Kakashi had always been an elusive person, but dealing with such frank disregard had put Sasuke’s recent complaints about Kakashi into perspective.

To Naruto’s surprise, Iruka had been the same, apparently aware of what was happening but not willing to let on how much he knew. It gave Naruto second thoughts about Iruka’s strained interest that night they’d met in the park. Naruto had assumed it was because of his relationship with Sasuke that made Iruka less receptive toward Hotaru, but Iruka had worn the same resigned expression evading Naruto’s questions like he did while he sat next to Naruto on the swings.

Even Sakura, who’d made a house call the day after Hotaru appeared on Naruto and Sasuke’s doorstep, didn’t have anything to add. When Naruto asked, she’d claimed she was sent by Tsunade to check on a child Naruto and Sasuke were taking care of, and that was the extent of what she knew.

Hand tense, Naruto knocked on the door to Tsunade’s office. He announced himself and waited for permission to go in. She wasn’t a last resort, but this encounter was inevitable if he ever hoped to gain any kind of understanding.

“And here I was hoping to avoid seeing your mug until tomorrow.” Placing the pen in her hand on her desk, Tsunade looked up as Naruto entered. “Is there something I can do for you?”

Naruto stopped in front of her desk but didn’t take a seat in the chair behind him. “That depends on what you tell me.”

“Which would depend on what you want to know.”

Naruto quirked his lips. Tsunade wasn’t going to volunteer any information, and Naruto wouldn’t get her to budge unless he approached this head first. “You know I came here about Hotaru. And yeah, it’s on me for not coming to you sooner, but there’s a lot you haven’t been saying, either. Since me and Sasuke came with Hotaru that day, you knew. About where Hotaru came from and why he was here, you knew.”

“If I didn’t know about the kid the first time you asked me, what makes now any different?”

“His name,” Naruto said, “is Hotaru.”

“Fine, Hotaru,” Tsunade said. She shuffled the papers scattered across her desk, putting them all into one pile. “Again, why would I know?”

“Because this is bigger than some kid who happened to look exactly like me finding his way to Sasuke. And you’re not exactly the kind of person to let something like that go under your watch.”

“Well, suffice to say, I can’t explain how the kid found Uchiha.”

“Then explain why people are acting like Hotaru never existed, why no one could make the connection with me and Sasuke when I showed them this.” Naruto took the photo of Sasuke and Hotaru out of his pocket. He smoothed out the edges and held it up for Tsunade to see. “Why they had to struggle to see something that should have been obvious.”

Tsunade sat up in her chair. She reached for the photo and held it between her fingers, bringing it closer to her face when Naruto let go.

“You can’t tell me Hotaru wasn’t real,” Naruto said, “so explain to me why almost everyone I showed his picture to looked at me like he wasn’t.”

“You still think I know?”

Naruto shook his head. “I don’t think. I know you have some kind of idea about what’s going on. Nobody wants to say anything, but if I find out you had something to do with this, I’ll—”

“And if I did, you’ll do what?” Tsunade’s voice was condescending, paired with a shrewd smile. “Don’t overstep your boundaries, Naruto.”

Naruto stepped away from the desk. It’d initially been an offhand comment he’d made to Sasuke, saying Tsunade had something to do with Hotaru appearing on their doorstep. Now Naruto was convinced he hadn’t been too far from the mark, but the outright accusation he’d made was dangerous. The beginnings of a threat that followed made it worse, and Naruto was lucky Tsunade knew him well enough not to take his venting too seriously.

“Look, you’re the only person I can turn to right now. I came to you for answers. Is that too much to ask?” 

“What was it that you once told me?” Tsunade said. “That these things happen and sometimes you can only accept it and move on?"

Naruto curled his hands into fists. “You can’t throw my words back at me at a time like this.”

“Oh, so I can only do it when it’s convenient for you?”

“That’s not what I said.”

“Then say what you mean, Naruto, because I don’t know what to tell you if you don’t.”

“All right.” Naruto sniffed and rolled his shoulders. “Tell me you didn’t have anything to do with Hotaru. Tell me you don’t have a clue about where Hotaru came from or why he’s gone.”

Tsunade laid the photo of Sasuke and Hotaru on her desk. She mumbled about needing a drink and opened a drawer, neatly placing the stack of papers she’d arranged inside.

“I already know that scroll Sasuke took to Kusagakure has something to do with it,” Naruto said, eyes narrowing when he caught the slight pause of Tsunade’s hands. “It wasn’t that hard to put together.”

“Did you read the scroll?” 

“...what would happen if I did?”

Naruto wasn’t so thoughtless to confess he’d read a translation of the scroll. He wasn’t going to compromise Sasuke’s standing because of what he personally saw as a technicality, but he still wanted to gauge Tsunade’s reaction, why she’d hesitated when he mentioned the scroll. 

He couldn’t be sure that Tsunade would agree with his logic, not in her official capacity as Hokage, but Naruto stood by what he’d said to Sasuke. Reading the notes Sasuke had written about the scroll wasn’t the same as reading the scroll itself. And despite how Sasuke reacted when he found Naruto with the notebook, it wasn’t much of a leap for Naruto to think Sasuke had actually wanted him to read it. Any other time, Sasuke was careful to put away whatever he didn’t want Naruto to find, and Naruto respected there were some parts of Sasuke’s life he wasn’t going to know about until Sasuke was ready to tell him.

Granted, there were exceptions to certain, more personal things Naruto wouldn’t have been able to find anyway, but it usually wasn’t a big deal if Naruto peeked at some of Sasuke’s lessons plans or any of the work Sasuke brought home that he kept in plain sight. Notwithstanding Sasuke using a rolled up stack of papers to hit Naruto on the back of the head for his troubles too many of the times Naruto didn’t ask beforehand, the fact that Sasuke left the notebook on the desk, clear for even Hotaru to see, had to mean Sasuke had given Naruto an open invitation. Of course Naruto had taken it. The importance of Sasuke’s mission, despite the implications that the scroll could be a key in rebuilding the alliance between Konoha and Kusagakure, had been heavily understated, and Naruto had needed to know what in that scroll had been the cause of so much secrecy and why Sasuke had been thrown in the middle of it.

“Nothing would happen.” With the bottom of her sandal, Tsunade slammed the drawer shut. “Because you didn’t read the scroll.”

Slowly, Naruto nodded. Although Tsunade was clearly giving him an out, he held no desire to persuade her into believing otherwise. He was being truthful in agreeing that he hadn’t read the scroll. He couldn’t. His inability to read it hadn’t been for lack of trying, but going over Sasuke’s notes had still provided Naruto with insight to establish something a little more solid in pinpointing how the scroll concerned Hotaru.

The connection went beyond Hotaru showing up the day after Sasuke received the scroll and Hotaru vanishing the day before Sasuke took the scroll to Kusagakure. The fable in the scroll had only confirmed Naruto’s suspicions. At first, the similarities between Hotaru and Setsu’s story seemed more coincidental than apparent. It’d been strange to find any similarities at all, but the more time Naruto took to re-evaluate each moment with Hotaru, the easier it became to draw parallels between the fable and what he’d observed of Hotaru, mainly how Hotaru had interacted with Sasuke.

The most obvious of the similarities was the significance behind Hotaru’s name. Naruto had thought it was funny then, Hotaru being afraid of the fireflies he shared his name with, but the knowledge of Setsu’s story had marred the memory of that night.

It was jarring. Something as innocent as catching fireflies with Hotaru, the allusions to Setsu attempting to do the same in order to find his way home were uncanny. Other than coincidence, Naruto didn’t know what else to call it. But, the undertones of his conversation with Hotaru aside, it couldn’t have just been coincidence. And if he factored in Hotaru’s nervousness to separate himself from Sasuke, the strange longing in Hotaru’s eyes when he’d look at Sasuke that Naruto hadn’t been able to place, like Hotaru had been trying to make sure Sasuke wouldn’t disappear—it was on the tip of his tongue, the link Naruto was missing.

As abrupt as the transition had been, undeniably, Naruto had grown close to Hotaru. He’d gone from panicking at the sight of his miniature doppelganger to genuinely deciding with Sasuke to bring Hotaru into their lives, but with Sasuke’s relationship with Hotaru, the connection had been instantaneous. The sheer normality of watching them together had unnerved Naruto when he walked in on Sasuke giving Hotaru a bath. It unnerved him now, despite his feelings toward Hotaru, to think how quickly Sasuke had allowed himself to latch on to someone who, albeit a kid, had been a stranger. Not to say that Naruto was simply someone Hotaru had tolerated, but with Sasuke there was something more.

Hotaru may have resembled Naruto, yet it was almost as if he was an extension of Sasuke and not the imbalanced mesh of Naruto and Sasuke’s personalities Sasuke once described Hotaru as. Naruto took note that Hotaru had been unusually perceptive for a kid his age, conscious of what Sasuke was doing or where Sasuke was. He also noticed the same could have been said of Sasuke. Hotaru wouldn’t stray too far from Sasuke, and Sasuke would instinctively go out of his way to make himself available to Hotaru.

It went deeper than Sasuke’s experience at the Academy. He knew Sasuke was relaxed around kids in Hotaru’s age group, but if Naruto added the element of Sasuke’s relationship with him, the forced and almost sole dependence on Naruto as a result of Sasuke’s reintegration into Konoha, if that was the link Naruto was searching for—two of the most prominent aspects of Sasuke’s life, and if the scroll was somehow used as a means of bringing them together...

“See, I knew there was something off about Hotaru going straight to Sasuke.” Naruto frowned. “I mean, other than not knowing where Hotaru came from, but then there was something about Sasuke being so comfortable with Hotaru that fast. You saw how Sasuke almost didn’t let you hold Hotaru when the three of us came to you that day.

“I knew Hotaru looking like me had to do with it. I just couldn’t figure out how much that had to do with it since Hotaru didn’t recognise me when we first met, which was strange, you know, because at first I thought Hotaru looked more like me than Sasuke. But all Hotaru saw was Sasuke.

“Then again, if Hotaru didn’t look like me, Sasuke probably wouldn’t have acted the way he did. I’m not saying Sasuke would have closed the door on Hotaru. He’d never do that because he really likes working with little kids. Even if he didn’t, Sasuke has more than enough decency not to turn away a kid. But Hotaru was different. And for Hotaru to be different, to realise how much of an effect he would have on someone like Sasuke, you’d have to know about Sasuke’s relationship with me, and there—”

“Naruto—”

“—aren’t many people who really know about me and Sasuke. As far as most of Konoha’s concerned, I’m just Sasuke’s watchdog to make sure he doesn’t screw up again. So tell me, giving Sasuke that mission,” Naruto said, “was that a cover-up for some kind of test?”

An assessment of his loyalty, Sasuke had called it, when Naruto first asked him about the low-ranked mission Sasuke had been all too eager to accept, but to go this far, to put together something like this—after five years of having an entire village walk over him, what else did Sasuke have to do to prove himself? 

Tsunade began to open her mouth but withheld from saying anything.

“I almost want to say sending Sasuke to Kusagakure was to distract him, but Sasuke wouldn’t fall for something like that.” Naruto clenched his teeth. Although Sasuke hadn’t been able to put it into words, he’d been convinced from the start that they’d never see Hotaru again, and Naruto had done his best to refute it. “Taking Hotaru away was the real test, though, wasn’t it? To see what Sasuke would do. I just got caught in the crossfire.”

“...if you’re asking if I knew that the situation would present itself as it did…” Sighing, Tsunade glanced out the window. “Then, no. No, I didn’t.” 

“And that’s why you told me not to leave. You knew it wouldn’t change anything because Hotaru wasn’t coming back.”

“I did.”

“But if you already knew Hotaru wasn’t coming back, then why didn’t you...?”

Naruto understood enough about the politics in Konoha to figure out what happened. He didn’t like it or agree with the decision making that took place behind closed doors supposedly for the greater good. However, Naruto also had to take into account that the majority of the village was still wary of Sasuke, which was understandable. The stigma from Sasuke’s betrayal and the criminal status he’d warranted from that period hadn’t faded away. Even with the seal that regulated Sasuke’s abilities and range of techniques, Naruto was fully aware far too many people would have preferred Sasuke in a state where he wouldn’t be able to use them at all.

At the same time, though, Naruto couldn’t accept that Tsunade would have gone along with something like this. It rattled him. While she didn’t share Naruto’s sentiment about Sasuke, nonetheless, Tsunade was on Sasuke’s side. She was one of the few people who had supported Sasuke when Naruto dragged him back and helped make the case to spare Sasuke’s life in front of the Council. After the completion of Sasuke’s house arrest, she’d vouched for Sasuke during his yearlong appeal to reinstate his standing as a ninja. A lot of her influence had been due to Naruto’s insistence, some of it probably because Tsunade had felt sorry for Sasuke, but whatever it was that had swayed her, there was no doubt in Naruto’s mind that Tsunade cared about Sasuke.

Facing Naruto again, Tsunade said, “Is that all?” 

“Is that...?”

“Your hour’s almost up, and I have more important things to do with my time than cater to you all day.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll be leaving soon enough.” Naruto shook his head and scoffed. “Hear me out on this, though. No matter how I felt about it in the beginning, regardless of where Hotaru came from or what he really was, the day Hotaru found Sasuke is the day he became ours. The only thing we knew about Hotaru was that he didn’t have anywhere else to go. We weren’t going to just dump him wherever, not when Hotaru was the spit and image of me and especially not when Hotaru was already so emotionally attached to Sasuke. But you were counting on that. And we took Hotaru in like we were supposed to, didn’t we? I admit I didn’t think having Hotaru would make the impact that it did, but when it started to feel like the three of us were a...a—”

Taking a deep breath, Naruto ran his fingers through his hair. “When it starts to turn into more than just me and Sasuke, Hotaru disappears, and suddenly it’s like Hotaru was never there. A week might not seem like a long time to get close to someone, but even if there’s no real reason for why we invested so much of ourselves in Hotaru, the point is that we did. That’s not something we can walk away from. You can’t expect us to move on like nothing happened, and Sasuke—”

“Will deal with it.”

Naruto blinked. The words were unsympathetic, even by Tsunade’s standards, but he wasn’t sure if she truly meant it or purposely said it to be snide.

“And what about me?” Naruto asked. “Are you expecting me to deal with it, too?”

“Honestly, I’m not expecting you to do anything.”

“That’s it? That’s all you have to say about it?”

“If it’s any consolation, I...” Tsunade picked up the photo lying on her desk and gave it back to Naruto. “No, I guess anything along those lines won’t matter much to you. To either of you.”

It was the closest thing to an apology Tsunade would give, but Naruto wasn’t looking for some shallow rationale. He knew this was something out of her hands. He’d figured at least that much and couldn’t direct all of his anger at her. Still, whatever the extent of her participation in Hotaru’s existence, however she wanted to defend it, Naruto didn’t want to know. In the grand scheme of things, maybe she hadn’t been in a position to stop it. With her reluctance to acknowledge what she’d done, maybe her involvement was as much as a burden for her as Naruto wanted to think, but Tsunade wasn’t the one suffering the consequences for it.

“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. It won’t. Not much matters after the fact. I couldn’t care less what the intentions were or what you told yourself to free your conscience, and I—”

“Watch yourself, Naruto.”

Naruto rubbed the bottom of his palm against his temple. “Okay, just...just, were me and Sasuke—were we the only ones who didn’t know?”

Because if Sakura knew, if Iruka and Kakashi knew...

It would explain why Tsunade had sent Sakura over so quickly, why Iruka had been seemed conflicted about Naruto and Sasuke’s relationship with Hotaru, and why Kakashi had been watching Sasuke more carefully. Hotaru had seemingly been taken in stride, but Naruto wasn’t sure if it even stopped with them. If they did know, there then there was no telling who was actually involved, where it began and where it ended.

The whole thing was starting to feel like some kind of inside joke with Naruto and Sasuke inadvertently delivering the punch line.

Tsunade tapped her fingers on the desk. The sound of her nails clicking on the wood came in succession of threes. “Maybe it’s better this way.”

Naruto stilled. “Better?”

It was the umpteenth time he’d heard it since Sasuke left, but that seemed to be the general consensus. Naruto wanted to agree. He wanted to say it would have been better if Hotaru never came into their lives, easier if he could somehow push the time he’d spent with Hotaru behind him, forget about those ridiculously short five days that weren’t supposed to mean as much as they did. Except he couldn’t. Naruto couldn’t let it go, and trying to find a silver lining wasn’t going to make everything okay.

He didn’t know if things were ever going to be okay again.

“Don’t misunderstand me, though,” Tsunade said. “I won’t say I hadn’t considered the ramifications of putting the two of you in this situation. But the problem isn’t whether or not I had anything to do with it, Naruto. You can read in between the lines all you want. In the end, it doesn’t matter who knew whatever you’re assuming I know.”

Naruto eyed her cautiously. “What are you saying?”

“The real question is...” Tsunade leaned forward, crossing her arms and placing them on the desk. “…are you going to tell Uchiha about what you think I just told you?”

...

Left hand gripping the thin book pressing into his side, Sasuke walked into Tsunade’s office. He kept himself at arm’s length from her desk, standing with his feet close together, back straight. He bowed with a small tilt of his head.

“Hokage-sama.”

Tsunade didn’t spare Sasuke a glance but acknowledged him with a soft grunt. She was confined between her chair and the edge of her desk, seemingly transfixed by the large scroll that hid the lower half of her face. She held the scroll upright, with her elbows propped on the desk.

There was a tic over her left eye, growing more noticeable as Tsunade continued to read. She pushed away from the desk, creating a small gap between the chair and the edge of the desk where the scroll stood. Her eyes narrowed for a fraction of a second before she sniffed and withdrew the hint of agitation from her face. 

Sasuke shifted his weight, bearing a slightly wider stance. He pulled on his bag, tugged on a strap, too conscious of the weak sensation of the bag resting against his back. 

Deft fingers furled the scroll quickly, and Tsunade placed it in the upper right corner of her desk, beside a tall stack of books. Reclining in her chair, she crossed one leg over the other. She let her left arm lie slack across her torso, placing her right elbow on the armrest. Her head tipped to the side, supported by her right hand while she held her chin between her thumb and forefinger.

Sasuke squared his shoulders. He met Tsunade’s disinterested gaze and held his head high, attempting to feign some semblance of patience.

“I see you came back in one piece,” Tsunade said. Her eyes roamed over Sasuke, for a moment lingering on the book he was holding. “You don’t look too roughed up.”

“I’m not.”

“At least that’s one less thing for me to worry about,” Tsunade muttered. “Between you and that brat, you two have a lot of nerve. Showing up here whenever you want, thinking I run on your time. You weren’t expected to be back until this afternoon. And it’s what—almost six? You just assumed I’d be here waiting for you?”

Sasuke wasn’t moved by the lacklustre complaint. As often as Tsunade claimed to waste time indulging her vices, she took her title seriously. These days she rarely left her office. Before Naruto had left for his last mission, he’d grumbled to Sasuke about it, annoyed at Tsunade for not taking care of herself. Along with Shizune, he’d chastised Tsunade for working so much. However, with the general unrest among the major hidden villages, in particular the growing distrust toward those vying for a shift in the balance of power, Sasuke knew it was more likely Tsunade would be in her office than not.

It was just a matter of whether or not she’d be willing to see him this early.

“I wonder what you’d do if I wasn’t here” Tsunade said. “Turning up well before you’re expected sounds like a leap of faith on your part, I want to say, that you’d think I would set aside time for you. Yet I suspect you’re not the type to put conviction in such things.”

Sasuke clutched the book in his hand.

“I suppose it’s nice to rely on something like that every once in a while.” Tsunade smirked, but the amusement quickly fell from her face. “Although since you are here,” she said, “I take it you had no problems with the mission.”

“Yes.”

“And the delivery of the scroll was successful?”

“Yes, and this is...” Sasuke began, annoyed with himself for letting Tsunade see even the slightest hesitation. “I received this in return,” he said, motioning to the book at his side.

It was the book Seiko had given him. Consequently, it was something Sasuke wasn’t necessarily inclined to share with Tsunade. He’d given it enough consideration. He’d mulled over a decision that could ultimately cost him his only remaining link to Hotaru, yet the consequences of not telling Tsunade far outweighed the possibility of having the book confiscated. Although he’d accepted the book under the conviction that it was being presented to him explicitly and not the village he represented, Sasuke couldn’t afford failing his mission because he neglected to reveal the book he was given in lieu of the scroll to Tsunade.

It wouldn’t surprise him if that were true. As strained as the past couple of weeks had been, there wasn’t much he could be sure of anymore. However, despite his current reservations, disregarding what little he knew of Hotaru’s origins, especially concerning the people involved, Sasuke masked his reluctance as he handed the book to Tsunade.

He wouldn’t deny some of the reluctance was due to the level of resentment he held toward her, however superficial, yet, even with their fickle relationship, Tsunade was someone Sasuke respected. More importantly, she was one of the few people he trusted. At the very least, he’d allow himself to believe that stood for something.

“They traded you that scroll for this, huh?” Tsunade accepted the book with a frown. Attentive to the worn condition, she held it in both hands. She studied the back, finger slowly trailing along the spine, and then turned it around to look at the cover. Carefully, she opened the book. She skimmed through it with a few flicks of her wrist, the lines on her forehead deepening with each turn of the page. “There’s nothing in it.”

Sasuke didn’t bother to hide his confusion, hard pressed to contain underlying unease triggered by the possibility that evidence of his only connection to the scroll had disappeared—only to find it hadn’t. He could easily make out the stylised handwriting Tsunade apparently couldn’t see, the words still hauntingly familiar even when inverted. “But it’s—”

“Blank,” Tsunade said coolly, closing the book. “It’s an old book with nothing in it, which makes it blank, worthless even.” She cocked her head in thought. “It could be used as a journal of some sort, though. Maybe. You plan on writing your feelings down here?”

Sasuke could only stare.

The corner of Tsunade’s mouth curled upward. “Well, the book is certainly unexpected. However, it would have been...careless, I should say, to refuse a token of goodwill. Especially in these times. Don’t you agree?” Not giving Sasuke a chance to reply, she held the book toward him and said, “I suppose it’s yours then. Unless you prefer...”

Sasuke made a fist with his left hand, bearing a slight pain in his wrist. Slowly extending his right arm over the desk, he waited for Tsunade to give the book to him, immediately suppressing the sudden and reckless desire to snatch it from her. “I’ll take it.”

Tsunade placed her hands in her lap, expression sharp as she watched Sasuke slip the book into his bag. “Kusagakure’s evident hospitality aside,” she said, “everything looks good so far. However, pending any further correspondence with Kusagakure and my evaluation of your mission report, we’ll discuss the continued terms of your probation and what to do about that seal because—well, that I don’t need to explain.”

Sasuke gave an affirmative nod. There wasn’t much to explain. The seal on his lower back was waning and had been since Tsunade had performed it on him. It’d been on the Council’s insistence that she undertake the task, either due to her medical experience or the fact she’d exploited her authority in favour of sparing Sasuke’s life when he’d returned—personally, Sasuke thought the reasoning leaned more toward the latter. There’d been an inherent flaw, though. The seal, despite being chosen by the Council, didn’t fully restrain Sasuke. Although it was capable of restricting Sasuke’s use of chakra, the seal wasn’t strong enough to completely prevent access to it, like it’d been intended to.

The Council had supposedly been satisfied with the results because they hadn’t opposed it, but neither Sasuke nor Tsunade had taken the Council’s lapse in judgement lightly. Sasuke knew much of the oversight had to do with his state of mind at the time, which, coupled with the limited access to his chakra, encouraged most of the village to no longer perceive him as a threat he’d once been.

Initially, Tsunade was the only one who’d been fully aware of the seal’s provisional effects. The seal’s initial effectiveness had more to do with Sasuke’s then emotional instability—as Naruto preferred to call it—than any extensive influence on his ability to use chakra, and it wasn’t until he’d been released from house arrest that Sasuke truly took note of the seal’s ineptitude.

It’d started a few months prior to beginning his assistant position at the Academy. Though Sasuke had knowingly accepted Iruka’s offer for an indeterminate amount of time, the possibility of being reinstated as a ninja has still been there. So he’d engaged in a training regimen not solely dependent on chakra usage, worked to rehabilitate his body after forcibly neglecting it for so long. It was then he’d begun to notice the changes. They were slight, a series of improvements he’d thought were hardly worth notice. However, taken into context, having occurred within two weeks, the changes were vast. Regained agility and increased stamina, Sasuke had grudgingly attributed to not being in optimal shape, using it as incentive to push himself harder through each training session. But the ability to activate the bloodline he hadn’t been able to use in years could only be attributed to the increasing amount of chakra at his disposal.

He’d approached Tsunade about it first, surprised she’d admitted to knowing the seal’s effects wouldn’t last, even more so since she’d suggested Sasuke not disclose the new development to anyone else. He hadn’t even told Naruto, who’d found out last year when he’d caught Sasuke training alone in a secluded section of the forest. They hadn’t been on the best terms until recently, and Naruto, true to form, had been angry at the fact Sasuke was keeping something from him. He’d demanded to know if Tsunade knew about the dwindling effects of the seal but had been pacified when Sasuke admitted to telling her.

It became a secret between them, an unspoken agreement reinforced with frequent sparring, with which Naruto was only too happy to comply. Eventually, the secret trickled down to Sakura. Kakashi had already known, although through being told by Tsunade or figuring it out for himself, he wouldn’t say which. It’d been inevitable those two would know at some point, but the knowledge hadn’t gone beyond them. Sasuke had maintained a somewhat modest facade, purposely holding himself back and concealing his progress. Over the course of two years, Tsunade’s vague reference to the seal was only the second time she’d mentioned it.

“But before we get into that,” Tsunade said, “you know the drill. And if you want your compensation anytime soon...” she began, bending over to reach for something beneath her desk on the floor. She re-emerged with a thick book in her hands and gently set in on the desk. “What’s today?”

“Friday.”

“Then I’m looking forward to seeing a detailed report on my desk no later than Sunday afternoon. Understood?”

“Understood.”

Tsunade opened the book and licked her thumb. She flipped through the first few pages, pausing on the sixth page. Another page was turned, two more, and she sat closer to her desk, using one hand to flatten the back of the ninth page. She leaned over the book, her eyes following the fine print Sasuke couldn’t distinguish. She continued to read, turning one page after another, seemingly forgetting Sasuke’s presence.

“If that’s all you need of me,” Sasuke said, adding carefully, “Hokage-sama.”

“Of course, of course.” Not looking up, Tsunade made a flippant gesture with her hand, still engrossed in the book. “You can go.”

Sasuke gave a curt nod and turned around to leave.

“But, Uchiha.”

Sasuke faltered, stopping short of reaching the threshold. “...yes?”

“Did you find what you were looking for?”

“Hokage-sama?”

“In Kusagakure—did you find what you were looking for?”

“I don’t...”

“I know it wasn’t the ultimatum that made you to leave. It helped push you in that direction, maybe, but you would have gone regardless. And not because staying in Konoha would affect your eligibility for any future assignments.”

Sasuke stilled.

“Oh, you’re not that hard to figure out,” Tsunade said. “Even now, I can imagine the kinds of questions I know you won’t ask. Just as well, though, since it makes the situation more bearable for you. Pride and ambition, don’t let them be your downfall again. You will think about Naruto this time around, won’t you?”

Gritting his teeth, Sasuke fought to keep his composure. Both a warning and a reprimand, the reminder of his past was a hard truth Sasuke still had yet to swallow, but he wouldn’t give Tsunade the satisfaction of seeing the impact of her words.

“The lengths that boy will go for you...” 

Taking a deep breath, Sasuke closed his eyes and relaxed his jaw.

“Never mind that, though,” Tsunade said. “This may be a little presumptuous of me, but I’ll go ahead and say it anyway.” Her voice grew softer, tinged with something that sounded precariously close to sympathy. “You did well, Uchiha. Better than most would expect of you, especially after such a long time.”

Being prey to ignominy and constant scrutiny made the five years following his return seem even longer, but finally receiving acknowledgement from Tsunade was something of a hollow achievement. It wasn’t half as fulfilling as Sasuke wanted it to be.

“I’d hoped this way...” Tsunade sighed. “I don’t doubt you abilities or your willingness to prove yourself, but if you do gain anything from this experience, know that you did well. For your own sake, allow yourself to accept at least that much.

“So, whatever this may mean to you...” There was a rustle of paper, another page of Tsunade’s book being turned. “...welcome back.”

Sasuke opened his eyes, trained them on the window in the hallway. Hues of yellow and red bled across the horizon. They seeped into the sky, creating a bright shadow that began to stretch over the buildings down below.

“Remember,” Tsunade said, “I want that report no later than Sunday.”

Terse, Sasuke nodded his head and announced his departure, not waiting to be formally excused. One foot in front of the other bridged the transition out Tsunade’s office into the prevailing need to escape Hokage Tower.

Soon he was walking through waking streets still hushed without the sun, past the main gate guarded by eyes he couldn’t see, nearing the outskirts of Konoha not so far away, but it wasn’t until the village was a considerable distance behind him did Sasuke begin to slow down halfway along the path that would bring him home.

Tiny rocks crunched beneath his sandals, gravel littered through browning grass and buried within a thin layer of dried soil. It wasn’t a path per se. Rather, it was the quickest route Sasuke and Naruto took from Konoha to the house, as opposed to a predominantly visible trail.

Hotaru had compared it to following footprints. That Tuesday they’d gone shopping, Hotaru had followed Sasuke and Naruto to Konoha, but his eager steps had preceded Sasuke's and Naruto’s on the way back home. It shouldn’t have been too surprising, considering Hotaru had managed to find a house revealed only to a handful of people, but Naruto had asked Hotaru about it anyway.

“Hotaru, you—you remember how to get home all by yourself?”

“Un. I follow the footprints, Naruto,” Hotaru had said. He’d given a firm nod at Naruto’s awe, but had sounded tentative in his response. “Like a map.”

“Hmm...” Naruto had paused and pretended to think. “Like a map, you said?” 

“Naruto thinks that’s good?”

“Good enough to wish I’d thought of that,” Naruto had said, grinning at Hotaru. “But whose footprints do you follow, though?”

Sasuke had been walking behind them, interest piqued at the question, but Hotaru had simply given Naruto a small smile. He’d turned around to walk alongside Sasuke, reaching into one of the bags Sasuke was holding, and had taken out the stuffed turtle Naruto had bought for him. Carrying the turtle under one arm, he’d ran back to Naruto.

It’d looked as if Naruto wanted to ask Hotaru about the footprints again, but Hotaru had tugged on his pants, urging Naruto forward, and began to talk about the things he’d seen in Konoha. He’d diverted the question by describing how much he liked yakitori, slowly explaining why Naruto shouldn’t be friends with someone who thought Hotaru’s name was only for girls, listing objects that were red and orange because those were his favourite colours, asking Naruto if he should name his turtle Kame—it was enough that had Naruto had eventually let the matter drop, fully absorbed in the conversation and bouncing off an enthusiasm from Hotaru that rivalled his own.

Sasuke hadn’t put too much thought into the correlation between the footprints and how Hotaru had known the way to the house. He couldn’t when Hotaru wouldn’t readily discuss anything pertaining to his age, his name, or where he’d come from. No amount of encouragement, from either Sasuke or Naruto, would persuade Hotaru, which was partially due to the fickle attention span that was to be expected from kids. However, that particular instance of avoidance, Hotaru refusing to say whose footprints he’d followed, had been intentional, Sasuke was sure.

As precocious as Hotaru had been, maybe even more than he and Naruto had initially given him credit for, Sasuke had to wonder the extent of Hotaru’s self-awareness. On the surface, Hotaru was a near perfect amalgamation of them. It exceeded mere physical likeness and Hotaru’s ability to latch onto Sasuke and Naruto’s individual personalities. There’d been a surreal quality to Hotaru, yet something almost serene about his uncanny acuity, in his inherent dependence, in those receptive touches and subtle glances.

Yet it hadn’t been real.

Hotaru’s existence coinciding with Sasuke’s possession of the scroll wasn’t incidental, so it wasn’t at all farfetched to assume Hotaru couldn’t exist outside of a realm created around that condition. It was the only sensible conclusion. No longer having the scroll meant Hotaru no longer existed. Therefore, Sasuke could rationalise that Hotaru had never been real to begin with.

Like he’d told Naruto, none of it should have happened. How and why Hotaru came to be was arbitrary at this point. In that respect, Hotaru was as real as he and Naruto made him to be, but their relationship with Hotaru was based upon a farce narrowly held in place by an almost impulsive desire to see him as someone who could become part of their lives.

The moment he’d rang the doorbell, Hotaru had defied Sasuke’s perception of reality, twisting the impossible into something substantial, and luring Sasuke into an amenable daze simply because he couldn’t dispute it. Except Hotaru wasn’t here anymore, and Sasuke couldn’t hide behind the emotional upheaval Hotaru had caused.

He’d tried to be detached. If Sasuke could convince Naruto of how much Hotaru hadn’t affected him, maybe he could himself, too. Naruto just hadn’t left it alone. Although Sasuke hadn’t really expected anything else, Naruto had been disagreeable at every turn, making it that much more difficult because he wouldn’t give Sasuke the chance to forget Hotaru. But even if he wanted to, Sasuke wouldn’t be able to forget. 

It was Naruto he’d see every time he’d look at Hotaru. To let go of Hotaru was to let go of Naruto, and Sasuke would sooner welcome his unhealthy reliance on Naruto rather than sever that relationship. Yet Naruto would be a constant reminder. However unintentional, he’d given credence to an ideal of something that could never last. Simply because Naruto was there, because of the role he played in Sasuke’s life, Sasuke had readily accepted Hotaru, but it shouldn’t have happened. He shouldn’t have allowed himself to become so heavily involved, to be deluded by someone who couldn’t truly exist, and Hotaru wasn’t supposed to leave Sasuke with a regret that felt all too real.

It was a regret that tinged the anger Sasuke couldn’t sustain. He berated himself for assuming he’d be able to break away from his past without consequence, for knowingly conceding to a clause that could and did put him in this kind of position. Sasuke hadn’t been able to hold onto his anger for Tsunade, though, not when she’d given him an opportunity he wouldn’t refuse. He didn’t know why she’d assigned him the mission or if delivering the scroll actually had anything to do Konoha renewing its ties with Kusagakure. 

Albeit it wasn’t directly, she’d reinforced Naruto’s earlier accusations. Naruto’s then hasty claims of Tsunade orchestrating some maniacal scheme weren’t misplaced and evidently held some kind of truth. It’d been enough truth to pique Naruto’s curiosity, becoming a well-founded suspicion that provoked his attempt to read the scroll when Hotaru had disappeared. But if he’d approached Tsunade while Sasuke had been away...

Sasuke sighed as his feet continued to trudge along the seemingly indiscriminate path of dirt and grass. Whatever the connection between Hotaru and the scroll, he could do without knowing the motivation behind it. There was a part of him that didn’t want to know, maybe even resigned to Hotaru’s significance being something he was helpless to change. He’d already spent too much time thinking lately, but listening to the bottom of his sandals scrape over the ground could only deflect his thoughts for so long. The attempt at distraction was tenuous at best, fruitless when Sasuke stopped in front of the house.

Restive, he pulled his bag against his back, unconsciously searching for the slight weight of the book Tsunade hadn’t taken away. He looked down, eyes fixed on the porch. It was here he’d first met Hotaru, this place where Hotaru had stood, hiding his hands behind his back and scraping the heel of his sandal against the porch, peering at Sasuke with eyes in a shade of blue too dark to ever belong to Naruto.

Tomorrow would mark two weeks since that day, when Hotaru had launched himself at Sasuke. He’d worn that indulgent smile, placed small arms around Sasuke’s neck, said those three words that’d sent Sasuke reeling.

_I’m home, Sasuke_

Slowly, Sasuke reached for the door. He licked his lips, arm suspended in midair, hand lingering over the knob. His fingers balled into a fist, not quite touching the brass, straying away—like he’d been burned, Sasuke pulled his hand away.

He couldn’t place his reluctance to open the door. The hesitation didn’t make sense. There wasn’t any reason for it. Hotaru wasn’t going to be on the other side. Keeping himself here wouldn’t make a difference. However, Sasuke couldn’t bring himself to move forward, either. 

_Come on, Sasuke._

Hotaru had disappeared a week ago, on a morning like this, just before dawn according to Naruto. Reasonably, he wanted to think, seven days was ample time to adjust to life without Hotaru. Yet Sasuke couldn’t shatter what was left of that inane desire to cling to the belief that Naruto had somehow fixed what he’d promised, that he found Hotaru and had accomplished what Sasuke instinctively knew neither one of them could.

He still didn’t understand how he’d known Hotaru wasn’t coming back. He’d had done his best to fill the gaping holes in his memory, supplemented only by Naruto’s retelling of events. 

_I want to show Sasuke something._

Sasuke pressed the bottom of his palm against his forehead, closing his eyes at the pressure building between them. It was a dull throbbing, consistent with hindering every attempt to remember what’d happened that morning. 

_Does Sasuke want to know, too?_

A chill ran through his body, an abject feeling of cold vanishing as quickly as it had come. Sasuke kept his eyes shut, trying to pick apart the frays of stolen memories, glimmers of light surrounding clipped images that had been ripped away.

_I’m scared, Sasuke._

Sasuke hissed, nearly choking on a sharp intake of breath. He moved his hand over his temple, bearing down hard at the pounding in his skull. It resonated with the murmur of Hotaru’s voice, becoming louder and louder, merging with something deeper, something fami—

_I’m home_ —

“Sasuke.”

The sound of his name cut through the pulsation in his head, quieted the mantra in his mind, and Sasuke tensed. He hadn’t heard the door open. He hadn’t noticed how close Naruto was. To be that ignorant of his surroundings, to be caught so unawares, Sasuke hated that Naruto had seen him like this. He didn’t even want to think about how long Naruto had been watching him, waiting for Sasuke to notice he wasn’t alone.

“I was kind of hoping you’d open the door on your own,” Naruto said, voice low and scratchy from sleep. “But you were taking too long, so of course that meant I’d have to come out and drag you inside myself.”

Sasuke forced himself to look up. Mouth dry, he raised his head, not meeting Naruto’s eyes yet unable to turn away from the hazy impression of that tired smile so reminiscent of Hotaru.

Naruto stood barefoot in front of the door, dishevelled, seemingly taking up the width of the threshold with his body. He fiddled with the material of his white shirt, half of it carelessly stuffed into light blue boxers covered with pink hearts. He untucked the rest of the shirt and pulled up his boxers when they began to fall off his hips.

Languid, Sasuke shoved his hands into his pockets.

“We do have a doorbell, you know,” Naruto said, tilting his head to the side. He raised a hand to ruffle his already matted hair, pushing aside the strands falling over his face. The light from the sun exaggerated the shadows beneath his eyes. They were puffy, more pinkish than white, and accentuated by pillow creases running alongside his right cheek.

Naruto’s arm went limp, and his hand slapped against his thigh.

Sasuke took a step back.

“There’s the door, too,” Naruto said,” in case you forgot.” He took a step forward. “But if you didn’t want to knock, it’s not like you don’t have a key.”

“Naruto...”

Two more steps and Naruto was there. Before Sasuke had the chance to say no, Naruto was there. He was everywhere, encompassing everything around Sasuke, compelling him to stay with an almost desperate hold meant to constrict, but this wasn’t Naruto initiating a hug. It was Naruto devouring him.

Sasuke staggered. His legs threatened to buckle beneath the weight of Naruto pressing into his chest. Naruto was crushing him, keeping his arms at his side and trying to mould himself into Sasuke. His face was brushing against Sasuke’s cheek. His hands were creeping beneath his bag. They slipped inside Sasuke’s vest, rubbing circles into his back and going up and down his spine.

It itched where Naruto touched him. It clutched at his chest, a prickle that shot down his arms, swept through his stomach, and made the hair on his body stand on end. The contact tore at Sasuke’s clothes. Demanding fingers, firm and lithe, pierced though his shirt, seeped into Sasuke’s skin.

What Naruto was doing was purposely incisive. He knew Sasuke didn’t like it. He knew how much Sasuke couldn’t stand Naruto’s disregard for the concept of personal space when Sasuke was filthy like this, yet Naruto was unyielding. Each attempt to break the embrace only drew Sasuke closer. Each push was offset by a pull. Forcing this kind of proximity on him, Naruto was overwhelmingly intrusive, suffocating him, and he wouldn’t stop.

For reasons Sasuke didn’t want to fathom, Naruto wouldn’t let him go.

Warm air hit Sasuke’s neck, a draught of soft words that made him shiver, and Sasuke went rigid.

“Don’t forget about me because the better looking one is gone, all right,” Naruto whispered. 

The arms around him squeezed, and Sasuke rested his head on Naruto’s shoulder. Slowly, he felt the tension leave his body.

“We might not have Hotaru anymore,” Naruto said, “but there’s still us.”

Closing his eyes, Sasuke made a tentative reach to place his arms around Naruto’s waist. It was just Naruto. This was Naruto. This was...real, but if Sasuke was holding Naruto a little more tightly than he normally would, he was glad Naruto didn’t say anything.

“Don’t forget that, Sasuke.”

Sasuke released a shuddering breath, as shaky as the fingers curling around Naruto’s shirt. “...I know.”

“There’s always us.”

...

Following Sasuke inside the house, Naruto closed the door behind him and locked it. He chewed on his bottom lip, studying Sasuke’s profile for any telling reaction. When Sasuke stopped at the end of the entryway, Naruto paused, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.

The house probably would have passed Sasuke’s scrutiny even without Naruto’s last ditch effort to make it look presentable. In all honesty, there hadn’t been much to clean considering he hadn’t spent a lot of time at home since Sasuke had been gone, but he’d gotten rid of what little mess he’d made anyway, if only to keep from hearing Sasuke’s mouth about Naruto not being able to pick up after himself.

Everything looked spotless. To a degree, it even felt vacant, just like it had last night. It’d been useless trying to sleep with a feeling like that. Too anxious about Sasuke coming back and surrounded by the kind of emptiness made that much more oppressive with the lights Naruto couldn’t bring himself to turn off, he’d been stuck with an almost tangible sense of dread that had only begun to fade when Sasuke was inside the house.

Sasuke bent down to take off his shoes, looking away from the smaller ones placed next to Naruto’s. He removed the sandals slowly, careful not to shake any more of the dirt that he’d already brought in while he adjusted the bandages beginning to loosen from around his ankle. As Sasuke stood, Naruto noted the shift in his stance and the flicker of emotion that registered on Sasuke’s features, almost too fast for Naruto to catch.

Their house was small enough that most of it could be seen before even going into the living room. If Sasuke was surprised that Naruto had actually cleaned it without being told to, the only acknowledgement Sasuke made was to look at Naruto.

Those eyes he’d been waiting to see, that one part of Sasuke he’d needed to see. Catching Sasuke like this meant being able to read him without having to sort through everything else on the surface for whatever Sasuke didn’t want to show. But there was something in Sasuke’s eyes that made Naruto’s chest feel heavy, almost foreboding.

Uncrossing his arms, Naruto pushed himself from the wall. He came to a standstill when Sasuke turned away, but the sudden loss of eye contact had already sent the heavy feeling plummeting to Naruto’s stomach.

Hesitating, Sasuke let the straps of his bag slide down his arms and dropped the bag to the floor. The forehead protector came next, thrown on top of the bag as Sasuke began to take off his vest. Not bothering to fully unzip it, he pulled the vest over his head and used his free hand to try to flatten the hair he’d messed up.

“Hey...” Taking a step forward, Naruto reached for the strands covering Sasuke’s eyes and flinched when Sasuke pulled away, letting his arm fall back to the side.

Sasuke pushed the hair from his face. “I’m—I need to take a shower.”

“Oh.” 

Since he came back to Konoha, Sasuke had this thing about not being close to anyone when he was dirty. Except for the times Naruto could count on his hand, Sasuke wouldn’t let Naruto touch him. It was trying at first, figuring out to handle Sasuke being even more standoffish than when he left. And after the full-blown arguments that’d developed from Naruto’s initial teasing, childish names that came too easily or light touches here and there on a sweaty Sasuke following training or sparring, Naruto learned it wasn’t worth the energy to fight Sasuke about something that didn’t matter most of the time.

Yet Naruto had been determined to make this morning another one of those rare exceptions, whether Sasuke agreed to it or not, and pulled Sasuke into a hug before Sasuke had the chance to get away. Like he’d expected, Sasuke was stiff at first, and Naruto had made up his mind to ignore how self-conscious he’d felt. With Sasuke just standing there, it was like they were back in that newly discovered stage of their relationship, when they were stumbling into the different ways of being close to each other that had nothing to do with physical fights or sex.

When Sasuke had started to squirm, Naruto only held him a little tighter. Not enough that Sasuke couldn’t have gotten out of it if he really wanted to, but it wasn’t until Naruto made it clear he wasn’t going to budge that Sasuke allowed himself to relax and eventually return the hug.

Regardless of whatever hang-ups Sasuke had about being touched like that, it wasn’t for Naruto’s sake. Sasuke could have been covered in mud for all Naruto cared. It wouldn’t have stopped him from ramming his way past that particular defence of Sasuke’s.

If Hotaru’s appearance had made Naruto’s insecurities about his relationship with Sasuke resurface, Hotaru’s disappearance had exposed the underlying rift between them that Naruto had ultimately been trying to bridge since he’d known Sasuke. By not giving Sasuke any leeway, crossing Sasuke’s established boundaries he’d come to memorise, of course he’d been running the risk of Sasuke using just as much energy to pull away. Naruto was always aware of the possibility that his actions, despite his intentions, could work to undermine what he and Sasuke had built of their relationship up to an existing point. Sometimes the distinction between getting Sasuke to open up and yanking Sasuke out his comfort zone wasn’t an easy one for Naruto to make. This time, however, he had wilfully ignored that line.

There was something overwhelming about the kind of comfort that came from seeing Sasuke. Just holding Sasuke was enough to spur a relief that nearly overshadowed everything from the past two weeks, but the simple act of being held by Sasuke conveyed all the little things Naruto couldn’t always expect from Sasuke with words. So after a week of anticipation, as he’d gone to meet Sasuke on the other side of the door, of course he’d been anxious when Sasuke hadn’t made the move to go beyond it.

Impulse made Naruto want to confront Sasuke on his own terms, demand Sasuke to explain how complicated opening a door could be, but he’d forced himself to wait. He’d placated himself with the fact that Sasuke had seemingly made it back in one piece, and if Sasuke needed a little more time, Naruto could give him that.

He hadn’t been able to hold out for long, though. Not with Sasuke being so close and a door being the only thing separating them. Maybe the extra seconds hadn’t added to the few minutes that felt more like hours, like days if he held his breath for a moment or two, but Naruto hadn’t put too much thought into the concept of time. Instead, he’d taken the initiative to meet Sasuke halfway.

Vest bunched under his arm, Sasuke took a step back. “I’m not clean.”

“Yeah, I know. I’ll just...”

Sasuke didn’t wait for Naruto to finish. He headed toward the bedroom, taking long strides that wavered, became short, and Naruto felt his throat tighten when Sasuke froze in the middle of the hall.

Being this openly indecisive was uncharacteristic of Sasuke, and Naruto stared, fidgeting with a growing unease that kept him rooted in place. He wondered if Sasuke was going to turn around, but the awkward stretch of simply waiting for something to happen was fleeting.

Arm slack, Sasuke dropped his vest to the side. It dangled from his hand, teetered on two fingers, following Sasuke into the bedroom and out of Naruto’s sight.

Naruto debated going after Sasuke. His decision alternated with the patter of his feet against the floor and led him toward the couch. With a grunt, he sat down. It was better to stay, at least until Sasuke was finished. He figured any attempts at confrontation would be easier when Sasuke couldn’t use not being clean as an excuse. However that turned out, though...

Suddenly listless, Naruto slumped into the cushion. He closed his eyes and let his head hang over the back of the couch. He knew the position wasn’t doing any favours for his posture, but in this instance it was just easier not to care.

For all the good it did planning the different scenarios today, Naruto’s mind had gone blank when he’d actually seen Sasuke.

He supposed he’d put too much thought into it, trying to decide what he’d say when he saw Sasuke again. It wasn’t that he hadn’t been able to function during Sasuke’s absence. They’d been apart before. A week couldn’t even begin to compare to the time they’d never get back, but it’d been a while since he’d waited for Sasuke like this.

After five years of getting used to Sasuke staying in Konoha, still there whenever Naruto turned around to make sure, the difficulty Naruto was having adjusting to the idea of Sasuke leaving surprised him. He could blame it on his relationship with Sasuke. Not that the dynamic between them had changed so drastically, but there were other aspects adding a new depth to the urgency that came with the kind of lives they led. It was an issue Naruto didn’t know how to deal with. Or, if he wanted to be honest with himself, it was an issue he wasn’t ready to.

He’d known Sasuke’s position at the Academy was temporary. Sasuke’s unexpected soft spot for kids aside, Naruto couldn’t imagine Sasuke satisfied with being Iruka’s assistant indefinitely and would have been upset if that had been the case.

Sasuke wasn’t someone to accept his own limitations, whether they were forced on him or not. The seal restricting most of his chakra wasn’t meant to be permanent. And although it was only recently that Sasuke had been reinstated as a ninja, his circumstances had given him a flexible margin when it came to rank. Following the mission in Kusagakure, it was inevitable that Sasuke would begin to take on more responsibilities, and he’d be promoted to chuunin. Then Tsunade would appoint him to jounin, maybe more. Naruto wasn’t sure how long it’d take, but despite his almost reluctance at the events being set in motion, it did make him happy to think he’d eventually walk alongside Sasuke like that again. 

However, if knowing Hotaru was part of that path, if Hotaru’s existence was a test to measure the extent of Sasuke’s devotion to Konoha, Naruto couldn’t understand how the price of losing Hotaru was on the same scale as Sasuke regaining the life he’d left behind.

They were two completely different things. Hotaru coming from that scroll or not, he was real in the only place it mattered, more than enough to have a very real effect on both Naruto and Sasuke. And to compare their relationship with Hotaru to Sasuke’s future standing in the village...

As much as Naruto didn’t want to admit it, his conversation with Tsunade yesterday and the implications behind what she hadn’t said about Hotaru scared him. But while Tsunade hadn’t denied knowing about Hotaru beforehand, the circumstances seemed to be out of even her reach. Whatever the tension between Sasuke and Tsunade, it didn’t amount to Tsunade using a kid to take advantage of Sasuke’s emotional state and knowingly letting Naruto get caught up in between that. There had to be something else going on, pieces to a bigger picture he couldn’t see.

Tsunade may have been involved with Hotaru’s existence, but she’d revealed just enough for Naruto to fill in the blanks that she hadn’t acted alone. Naruto didn’t doubt that for a second. Even if he did, Tsunade’s poor attempts to put him off the subject of Hotaru made the things she couldn’t say obvious. All the same, as skewed as entire the situation was, what Naruto found more disturbing was the fact that Tsunade had been convinced to go along with it in the first place.

Considering Sasuke’s track record with the Council, it wouldn’t be too unreasonable to suspect them of having something to do with Hotaru, too. But Naruto didn’t believe Sasuke’s past was so unforgivable that the Council would resort to such a method just to assert their authority. Not after so long. Sentencing Sasuke to a three-year house arrest instead of death, allowing him to work at the Academy, and then waiting two years, right before Sasuke’s mission, just to remind Sasuke how short their leash on him was? The timing was as convenient as Hotaru disappearing the day before Sasuke had to leave for Kusagakure. 

Maybe he was giving them too much credit. Since Naruto could remember, like most of the rest of Konoha, not much had changed of the Council’s opinion of him. They were still wary of the power sealed within him and his ability to control that power, although Naruto would say the Council held a little less disapproval toward him than they did Sasuke.

Even if it was just speculation at this point, he still couldn’t believe the Council would put that much effort into something like this.

And if the Council wasn’t behind it, or at least if they weren’t the only party pulling strings, it threw Naruto right back at square one.

But, like Tsunade had said, did it really matter in the end?

It wasn’t like Naruto could go around pointing fingers at random and expect someone to suddenly come forward. People weren’t going to get their hands dirty when they didn’t want to take the blame, and serious accusations like that, he definitely wasn’t in a position to make them, much less for something he didn’t have any proof for. Hotaru was gone. According to everyone who couldn’t even recognise Hotaru in a photo, Hotaru had never existed outside the realm of Naruto’s imagination. The scroll was gone, too. There were still Sasuke’s notes, but by Sasuke’s own account, the scroll was just a fairy tale anyway. 

All the secrecy and coincidences leading toward a particular outcome, everything riding on Sasuke’s reaction based on something that apparently never happened, and now it fell to Naruto to make the final move.

Tsunade had summed it up a little too neatly when she’d asked if Naruto was going to tell Sasuke about their conversation. The question had hit him hard. Of course he couldn’t come up with an answer then. He’d had none, still didn’t, and those words had marked the end of a discussion he wasn’t going to continue.

But supposing he did tell Sasuke, how much of a difference would it actually make in the long run?

For the most part, Naruto thought Sasuke was predictable, sometimes enough that he could be manipulated under certain conditions when the right buttons were pushed. Naruto wouldn’t be too quick to call it a weakness, at least not to Sasuke’s face, but Sasuke wasn’t exactly the best at adapting to change that challenged him emotionally, especially on a large scale. He went from one extreme to another, closing himself off or taking out his inability to cope on everyone around him, which made him more susceptible to outside influences if he wasn’t careful. Although given the current situation, if Hotaru was simply a means in order to drive Sasuke to that state of mind, the possibility of Sasuke defecting from Konoha again was the least of Naruto’s worries.

Frankly, there was nowhere else for Sasuke to go. He was a different person now. Although his need for revenge had nearly consumed him, when he did achieve that goal, Sasuke mostly just...wandered. Physically, mentally—it was sheer luck Naruto had stumbled across Sasuke that day at all, but of course Sasuke hadn’t returned to Konoha by choice. Learning from a history of failed communication, Naruto hadn’t had the patience to talk. They’d picked up where they’d always left off, continuing a long-standing argument that could only be settled with fists, and it was Kakashi, after finding them lying unconscious next to each other, who’d finally brought Sasuke back to Konoha.

But it was Naruto, struggling to salvage that shell of a person still managing to defy him every step of the way, who’d provided the kind of permanence that made Konoha a home for Sasuke again.

Funny enough, despite Sasuke’s treatment since he’d been back, Konoha had become a source of stability for him. It was familiar, and Sasuke had grown to appreciate familiar things. He craved them. The few things he held onto, like his bond with Naruto, Sasuke took them in almost any capacity. And since Naruto was a constant, Sasuke’s dependence on him even having a significant part in the development of their relationship, he knew Sasuke wouldn’t abandon Konoha again because Naruto was still tied to Konoha.

It was a bold statement to make, although when it came down to it, Naruto didn’t think he was overestimating his importance to Sasuke. Even so, that didn’t mean Sasuke couldn’t stay in Konoha without staying with Naruto. And cornered with that possibility, a fear preying on him since he’d taken that step with Sasuke, as selfish as it was, Naruto couldn’t decide if telling Sasuke what Tsunade hadn’t directly confirmed about Hotaru was worth the risk of Sasuke leaving their relationship.

So now Naruto had to ask himself, would it matter if Sasuke didn’t know?

Assuming Sasuke hadn’t already come to the same conclusions about Hotaru’s origins, he’d been convinced Hotaru wasn’t coming back from the start, despite Naruto’s attempts to persuade him otherwise, and hadn’t said anything when Naruto acknowledged Hotaru was gone for good. There was the stipulation that came with the scroll, too. It held true after Sasuke completed the mission and was probably why Tsunade had seemed confident that Sasuke wouldn’t approach her about it. Since Hotaru’s origins and the scroll went hand in hand, if Sasuke was even suspected of having discussed the scroll, the Council wouldn’t think twice. They’d strip Sasuke of his rank, and all that progress he’d made, it wouldn’t mean a thing.

Although if Sasuke came to Naruto...

The shrewd level of manipulation, how nicely the situation resolved itself, when everything was said and done, did Sasuke deserve to know?

Yes.

It was only right Sasuke should know. Being in the centre of it all was reason enough to give Sasuke some kind of affirmation so he wouldn’t have to sort through whatever misgivings he did have on his own. That Naruto couldn’t ignore, but it wasn’t the decision he was pitting himself against.

The real question was, if telling him wasn’t going to change anything in the end, did Sasuke really _need_ to know?

At the creak of a door opening, Naruto shot up. He placed his arm on the back of the couch, turning around in time to see Sasuke coming out of the bathroom. His eyes followed the steam trailing Sasuke, moving up from the hems of the long pants dragging on the floor, straying past the towel in Sasuke’s hand, and settling on the oversized shirt Sasuke was wearing. Sasuke draped the towel over his neck. He grabbed one end, using it to dry the back of his hair as he disappeared into the bedroom.

Taking a deep breath, Naruto settled back on the couch and wiped his palm on the side of his leg. He sat forward, elbows resting on his knees and fingers interlaced in front of him. His leg began to bounce. The heel of his foot was tapping on the floor. Two taps for each second, 118 taps for 59 seconds. Two more taps for another second. One minute became two minutes, then three minutes, four minutes—heaving himself from the couch, Naruto rushed into the hallway.

He retraced Sasuke’s steps, stopping outside of the bedroom. The door was wide open, so far back it was almost touching the wall. Subconsciously, Naruto reached to push on a surface that wasn’t there, but his eyes went straight to Sasuke. Across from the window, Sasuke was sitting against the bed. He was facing away from Naruto, hunched over something in his lap Naruto couldn’t see. Brows furrowed, Naruto moved to go inside the room but took a step back and raised a fist to knock on the doorframe.

Keeping his head down, Sasuke said, “Since when do you need to knock?”

“I don’t?” Naruto said, taking Sasuke’s words as an invitation to come in. It seemed silly to wait for permission when he and Sasuke shared the room. But subtle things like this, Naruto discovered, were one of the more reliable ways of gauging Sasuke’s mood. 

Sasuke snorted. “Idiot.”

“Yeah, well...” Squinting, Naruto placed a hand over his eyes, shielding his face from the light coming through the window. He walked around the bed, overlooking the stuffed turtle propped up by the pillows, and sat down next to Sasuke.

“You found them,” Naruto said, crossing his legs and gesturing with his head toward the photos in Sasuke’s lap. “So that’s what you were looking at.”

“Mm-hm.”

“I got the film developed the day you left. I thought—I thought it’d be nice to have them by the time you got back.”

“What happened to this one?” Sasuke held out the photo of Hotaru and Sasuke that Naruto had carried with him since Sasuke had been away. Eyes narrowed, Sasuke tried to smooth out the wrinkles that wouldn’t stay down.

“I, um, when I was out there looking for...Hotaru, that’s the one I kept with me.”

Sasuke raised his head to look at Naruto. His hair was damp, and his skin was still blotchy from taking a shower. “Are these the only ones we took from that night?” 

“It seems like we took more, I know, but those—yeah, those are the only ones.”

Not including the duplicates Naruto had made to pass out, there were a little more than twenty photos in all. Sasuke continued to shuffle through them. It was the second time since Naruto had sat down, but Naruto only swallowed as he looked over the photos with Sasuke.

The first one was of Naruto pulling a squealing Hotaru from beneath the bed and then one of Naruto making the V sign over Sasuke’s head with Hotaru’s blurred thumb covering up the space where the bed and the wall were. The next one showed an annoyed Sasuke, with his arm outstretched, hand taking up most of the photo because Naruto had tried to get a picture with the camera in front of Sasuke’s face. Another photo was of Hotaru adjusting Sasuke’s glasses that he’d put on Naruto after he’d decided he liked the glasses on Naruto better than Sasuke. Then there was the picture Naruto had taken of Hotaru jumping on the bed before Sasuke had picked him up and put him on the floor.

But no matter how hard Naruto stared at the photos, tried to make those static memories come alive, everything from that night still felt far away. 

Pausing, Sasuke held up a photo featuring the three of them. In the middle, sitting on the bed, was a laughing Sasuke, leaning forward due to the weight of a Hotaru who had jumped on him from behind. Hotaru and Naruto wore matching smiles, with Naruto wrapping an arm around both Hotaru and Sasuke. He’d barely made it into the frame after setting the five second timer on the camera.

“Hotaru looks just like you in that one,” Naruto said, pointing at the photo. “Especially with the way your faces are squished together.”

“Don’t say that.”

“What? It’s true.”

“Don’t, Naruto. Just...don’t.”

“Okay, so maybe Hotaru had his moments, but once you got past the hair and the cheeks—I bet I could have proved it, too, if you’d let me dye Hotaru’s hair that day when we went shopp—”

“Naruto,” Sasuke said. He placed his hand on Naruto’s face, guiding Naruto forward until their lips were almost touching.

“...yeah?”

Sasuke let his hand wander. His fingers traced the edges of Naruto’s sideburns, light caresses Naruto leaned into when Sasuke’s hand took a gentle hold of Naruto’s ear. But then Sasuke glared. And his fingers pulled. “Stop talking.”

With a loud cry, Naruto smacked Sasuke’s hand away and nursed his sore ear. “I can’t believe you—that actually hurt.”

“It was supposed to.”

“Oh yeah? Then that means you have to let me do this.”

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“You’re clean now. Let me hug you.”

“Just because I’m clean doesn’t mean you can hug me.”

“What if I say please?”

“Naruto, don’t—” 

Throwing aside the towel around Sasuke’s shoulders, Naruto cradled the back of Sasuke’s head and pounced. The photos flew out of Sasuke’s lap as Naruto pushed Sasuke down. He and Sasuke hit the floor with a soft thud, and the photos scattered beside them, fanning out to disappear beneath the bed.

Sasuke sent Naruto a less than agreeable look that Naruto returned with a sheepish one of his own. “Oops?”

“I’m not picking those up.”

“I’m not expecting you to.” Kneading his fingers through the hair curled at the nape of Sasuke’s neck, slowly, Naruto withdrew his hand. 

Covering his mouth with the back of his hand, Sasuke yawned. “You shouldn’t.” 

“Like I said, I’m not. You don’t have to pick them up. I’ll do it.”

“You’re still sitting on me.”

“I meant later. I’ll pick them up later.”

Turning away, Sasuke closed his eyes and placed an arm over his forehead.

“I’m serious, Sasuke,” Naruto said, laying his head on Sasuke’s chest. “I will, just—can it be all right if we stay here a little longer?”

“Naruto...”

“This isn’t so bad, is it?”

“...no.”

“Being here like this. The two of us. Nothing’s wrong with that, right?”

“No, this is...”

Fighting back the burn behind his eyes, Naruto clenched his teeth. He concentrated on Sasuke’s breathing, monitoring the steady pattern of inhales and exhales, and content to just listen as his head rose and fell with Sasuke’s chest. Tempted to give in to the slow but constant beating, he sank into the feel of Sasuke solid beneath him, swayed by the gentle motions that promised to lull him into sleep. But as nice as it was, receiving this kind of compliance from Sasuke, Naruto couldn’t stand it.

He could get Sasuke being tired. That was to be expected. Not like this, though. Naruto would have preferred Sasuke’s anger to this, Sasuke pushing him away, Sasuke lashing out at him—anything over this defeated kind of acceptance that made Naruto afraid to move. It reminded him too much of that shell Sasuke used to be. Because Sasuke was quiet, even for someone as reserved as him, and Naruto was lost trying to breach the distance Hotaru had left between them.

He was still on the fence about telling Sasuke about the conversation with Tsunade. He’d argue there were things Sasuke would keep from him, willingly or not, and rationalise not telling Sasuke in that regard. However, neither of them could avoid the fact that Hotaru wasn’t here.

They didn’t have to talk about it today, but it’d be there tomorrow, the day after, the week after, however long they’d be able to hold on. And while Naruto wasn’t eager to be the one to bring it up, he didn’t want to forget, either. He didn’t want to end up like the villagers he’d spoken to, like Shikamaru and Ino. He wanted to be able to recognise Hotaru’s face in a photo. He didn’t want the day to come when Hotaru’s hat became something too childish to keep and Hotaru’s sandals became a pair of shoes too small to wear. The things he and Sasuke had done for someone who’d become so involved in their lives, Naruto didn’t want to remember doing it for some kid. He wanted to remember doing it for Hotaru.

So maybe if he told Sasuke about the selective amnesia, about the real motivation behind Hotaru’s existence and the hidden meanings behind Tsunade’s words, then they could—

“You’re thinking too hard,” Sasuke said.

“Huh?”

“Whatever you’re thinking about, I can practically hear you. If it’s about Hotaru—”

“Sasuke, you—”

“It’ll be okay.” 

“Okay?” Naruto lifted his head and frowned. “Why would—is that what you really think?”

“It doesn’t matter what I think.”

“I didn’t ask if it mattered what you think. I asked if that’s what you really think about—”

“It’ll be okay, Naruto.”

“How can—?”

“Because it has to be.”

Pressing his lips together, Naruto bit back another protest. “...what about us then?”

Sasuke sighed.

Naruto stared at Sasuke. When Sasuke didn’t open his eyes, Naruto grabbed the hand at Sasuke’s side. He rubbed his thumb over Sasuke’s knuckles. “Sasuke?”

“Yeah?”

“Will we be okay?”

Sasuke took his hand away from Naruto’s grasp. Eyes still closed, he reached to bring Naruto back against his chest and placed a hand in Naruto’s hair. “We’re okay.”

“As long as we’re okay, that’s—that’s good.” Naruto hummed at the fingers massaging his scalp. “That has to be okay, too.”

“It is.”

“Who were we to try and raise a kid anyway?” Naruto murmured into Sasuke’s shirt. “Stupid, huh?”

“Maybe.”

“It was really nice, though, even if it was only for a little while.”

“But the time we did have with Hotaru,” Sasuke said, “shouldn’t that be enough?”

The fact that Sasuke felt the need to ask, not say, Naruto wasn’t sure he was the one Sasuke wanted to convince. He opened his mouth, on the verge of disagreeing with the seemingly passive stance Sasuke was trying to take, but held back when he realised he didn’t have an answer for Sasuke.

He wanted to think that maybe if he and Sasuke knew about Hotaru beforehand, there was a chance it would have made of a difference. Maybe it would have prevented Naruto from coming up with the idea of redecorating the guestroom. Then he wouldn’t have been so excited about painting a mural of the sky at night, with the moon on the ceiling, above the bed, and as many stars as Hotaru felt like drawing on the walls. And maybe he and Sasuke wouldn’t have had those conversations about choosing a family name for Hotaru. Then they would have known how redundant either decision would be, much like the adoptions papers hidden in the top drawer of Sasuke’s desk.

But Naruto knew he’d only be kidding himself. He couldn’t have predicted how emotionally invested they’d become in Hotaru, and he’d be a fool to believe it was ever possible to fit a childhood in that short period of time. In less than a week, he and Sasuke had been able to give Hotaru the kinds of experiences Naruto wished he’d had. Although it didn’t make up for the fact that Hotaru was gone, Naruto couldn’t bring himself to regret Hotaru coming into their lives. 

Yet there was still so much they hadn’t done. Watching Hotaru run around with kids his own age, letting him pick out clothes to wear to festivals, teaching him how to fold the small clothes he’d stuffed in the dresser, taking him to the Academy on his first day—just experiencing Hotaru grow up—all the normal things Naruto had been looking forward to being a part of.

After having those opportunities snatched away, Naruto was powerless to get them back. He’d lumbered through the uncertainty that followed, trying to regain some semblance of normality in a world that hadn’t existed before Hotaru. Whatever pieces remained of that life, in order to move on, maybe it should have been enough to at least have those. But being left with this loss, this empty feeling that simply hurt, what little time they did have with Hotaru would never be enough.

“Sasuke, I—”

There was a low rumble in the room, a gurgling noise that sounded louder than it had any right to be, bouncing off the walls well after it left Naruto’s stomach.

Sasuke freezing in his ministrations to Naruto’s scalp, Naruto tried to smother his laughter in Sasuke’s shirt. “I guess that means I’m hungry.”

“You think?” Groaning, Sasuke took his hand out of Naruto’s hair and let his arm fall to the floor. “Go get something to eat.”

“Not now.” Naruto raised his head to look at Sasuke. “I really don’t feel like making anything, but—hey, want to go out for ramen or something?”

“Ramen? This early?”

“Or something,” Naruto said again, failing to hold back a half-smile ready to spill over to the rest of his face. “As long as I don’t have to fix it myself. I’m more in the mood for ramen, though. Remember when we used to go to Ichiraku all the time after missions when we were younger? Me, you, and Sakura-chan, don’t you miss that?”

“Not when you tricked me into paying for you.”

“And I paid you back, didn’t I?”

“Eventually,” Sasuke said. “After I had to hunt you down and pry that damn frog wallet out of your hands.”

“Mmm, those were good times, weren’t they? But that’s not the point.” Naruto let his hand wander under Sasuke’s shirt, absently running his fingers along Sasuke’s side. “The point is we don’t go to my favourite place that much anymore. Come to think of it, I haven’t said hi to the old man and Ayame-chan in a while, either. They always like to feed me.”

Sasuke scoffed, but Naruto wasn’t discouraged by the not quite rejection. “Is that a yes or a no? Because if you have to think about it, that probably means—”

“No.”

“So...” Naruto began, letting the word linger in his throat, “that's a yes?”

“No, it’s a no.” Planting one hand on the floor for leverage, Sasuke shifted beneath Naruto. He made a half-hearted attempt to get up, and Naruto countered with his weight to keep Sasuke down.

“Yes?”

Sasuke pinched a small area of skin on Naruto’s forearm.

Hissing in pain, Naruto held his arm to his chest. “That’s not going to work on me.”

“Let me do it again.”

In a flash, Naruto was looming over Sasuke. He seized Sasuke’s wrists, pinning them above Sasuke’s head before Sasuke could pinch him again. “Will you go if I tell you it was Sakura-chan’s idea?”

“Was it?”

“Actually, it was.”

“Then no.”

“Oh come on, Sasuke. You were going to say no even if I said it was my idea.”

Tilting his chin up, Sasuke blew away the bangs that had fallen over his face, consequently blowing air into Naruto’s right eye. “And?”

Naruto blinked twice. Head drawn back, he blinked again and then glowered. “You did that on purpose.”

“Be grateful that’s all I did.”

“You really are an unmitigated bastard, you know that?” Putting pressure on Sasuke’s wrists, Naruto leaned down, his forehead hovering above Sasuke’s. “Too bad I’m still not letting you go.”

“You will when I make you get off me.”

“Sure you will,” Naruto said, ignoring the warning in Sasuke’s voice. He sat up and released his fingers from around Sasuke’s wrists. Smiling, he kept his legs on either side of Sasuke. “But we’re still on to go to Ichiraku, right?”

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

“The real reason I asked, though,” Naruto said, “was because Lee wants to see you.”

“Lee’s back? I thought he wasn’t expected back until next week?”

“Yeah, he got back Wednesday night, which reminds me. We need to thank him for that postcard he sent us. I forgot when I ran into him yesterday because—well, I wasn’t thinking about it then, but if we don’t see him today, we can definitely thank him tomorrow.”

“What’s going on tomorrow?”

“Sakura-chan wants to throw Lee a welcome back party tomorrow. It’s really short notice, I know, but that’s why she wants us to meet her at Ichiraku today. She wants it to be a surprise, except Lee already knows. Because Kiba accidentally let it slip. I think Lee’s just going to pretend he doesn’t know for Sakura-chan’s sake, though.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

Naruto shrugged. “Lee’s a nice enough guy that it doesn’t have to. All that matters is Ino bullied Shikamaru into making another cake,” he said, letting his mind drift to the thought of sinking his teeth into another one of Shikamaru’s cakes. “Chocolate this time, I think.”

Eyes travelling to the line of drool sliding down Naruto’s chin, Sasuke made a face. “You’re disgusting.”

Quickly, Naruto wiped the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand. He narrowed his eyes at Sasuke, hoping to detract from the heat he felt rushing to his cheeks. “It’s not my fault Shikamaru’s cakes are that good.”

“But it doesn’t give you an excuse to drool like that.”

“Shows what you know,” Naruto said, drying his hand on his shirt and ignoring Sasuke’s wary gaze following the movement. “You’re the strange kind of person who turns down things like cake.”

“You say it like it’s a bad thing. Considering you like to eat said cake I turn down, I don’t know see how you have any room to complain.”

“I’m not complaining. Not my fault you can’t handle your own shortcomings,” Naruto muttered. “But since it’s rare for Shikamaru to bake, that particular shortcoming works out pretty well for me.” Grinning, he rubbed his hands together. “With you at Lee’s party, I can get extra cake, and then Sakura-chan can’t yell at me for being greedy when I take your share.”

“Yeah, until she notices. We’ll see how well that works for you then.”

“Only if you tell her.”

“Believe me,” Sasuke said, voice muffled as he covered another yawn, “I won’t have to. You’ll give yourself away.”

“…you really do know how to bring a guy down.”

“Yes, because everything I do in life is to make sure you don’t get away with eating my slice of cake.”

“Bah. I don’t even know why Sakura-chan still goes through the trouble when she knows you don’t like that kind of stuff. It’s not like you really eat it. Why do you let her do it anyway?”

“It doesn’t bother me like it used to. That’s Sakura’s way of showing she cares.” Sasuke looked at the ceiling. His eyes were distant, searching for something beyond Naruto’s reach, but the pause was brief. No more than two or three seconds passed before Sasuke gave his attention back to Naruto. “It’s not so different compared to how Sakura used to behave, but that’s—I don’t think that’s a reason to reject it.”

“I guess…”

“Then again, if I didn’t accept it, she’d probably start treating me like you.”

Naruto sucked his teeth. “Whatever, Sasuke. You and Sakura-chan just like to gang up on me, that’s all.”

A small smile played on Sasuke’s lips, growing faint as Sasuke closed his eyes. “What time are we supposed meet Sakura at Ichiraku?”

“Four.” Naruto looked at the clock. It read a quarter after seven. “We still have time until then, but because you just came back, Sakura-chan will understand if you’re not up to it. I can fill you in when I get home.”

Sasuke nodded and made a soft noise in agreement.

“Unless you—Sasuke? You’re not falling asleep on me, are you?”

Sasuke arched an eyebrow, and Naruto snorted at the image that would have been less amusing if Sasuke actually had his eyes open.

Shaking his head, Naruto poked Sasuke in the ribs. “Get in the bed before you do that.”

With a grunt, Sasuke shoved Naruto off his stomach. He kicked at Naruto and rolled on his side, resting his head on his arm. “I’m fine.”

“What the—?” Naruto grimaced when his backside hit the floor. Unprepared for the ungainly landing and the subsequent kick to his side, he scowled at Sasuke. “You couldn’t have just told me to move?”

Sasuke made no sign that he’d heard Naruto, and Naruto made a face at the lack of response.

“Sasuke, you—I know you’re not sleeping.” Naruto nudged Sasuke on the shoulder. He did it again and then a third time with enough force to jolt Sasuke from pretending to be asleep. “There’s no way you went to sleep that fast.”

Not in the least swayed by Naruto’s far from gentle prodding, Sasuke didn’t so much as twitch. 

“Fine,” Naruto huffed. “If you’re going to be that way, you can stay there by yourself.”

When Sasuke still didn’t answer, Naruto felt his scowl fading and being replaced with a frown. Sasuke’s breathing was even, his mouth slightly open. Maybe he really was asleep.

Blindly, Naruto reached from behind for a pillow on the bed, pushing Kame aside but careful not to make the turtle fall. He set the pillow on the floor, next to the space above Sasuke’s head, and let his body follow. Since the floor wasn’t meant to be slept on like this, a futon would have been nice. A blanket just to lie on would be good, too, but short of dragging Sasuke to the bed, Naruto wasn’t going to get Sasuke to move anytime soon. Resigned, he got as comfortable as he could, repositioning himself on his side and facing Sasuke.

He scooted closer, putting his arm around Sasuke and resting his chin on top of Sasuke’s head. It wasn’t so cold that Naruto needed a blanket anyway, and whatever warmth he was lacking could be made up by stealing Sasuke’s body heat. Despite being on the floor, Naruto didn’t mind so much when he and Sasuke were like this. Experiencing the kind of closeness that consumed him, with their legs tangled together, the feel of Sasuke’s hair brushing against his skin, suspended in a moment the reality around them couldn’t penetrate, and it was hard not to fall into the mindset of wanting to stay like this forever.

There was no telling how much time he’d have with Sasuke, if it’d be cut short like the time they’d had with Hotaru. For now, all Naruto could do was enjoy it, but he was determined to do his best to make it last.

“Hey, Sasuke,” Naruto whispered.

“...hmm?”

“And you called me an idiot.” Naruto snorted and buried his face in Sasuke’s hair. “I knew you weren’t sleeping.”

Sasuke rubbed his foot against Naruto’s calf, and Naruto shivered at the touch. “Jeeze, why are your feet always so cold? The rest of you isn’t like this.”

“...my feet are not cold.”

“You keep thinking that,” Naruto mumbled. He inhaled, taking a second to breathe in the scent of Sasuke, mingled with the smell of the flower-shaped soap that Naruto liked more than he’d ever admit. Edging forward, he tried to bring Sasuke closer, tried to take up as much as he could of the little space still between them, and sighed when Sasuke didn’t push him away.

“I wonder if Hotaru would have wanted to go to Ichiraku,” Naruto said. “I mean, out of all the things we didn’t get a chance to do with Hotaru, you’d think going out for ramen wouldn’t have been one of them, you know. And it’s just I—do you think Hotaru would have liked it?”

Met with silence, Naruto wondered if Sasuke had dozed off again. That or Sasuke was berating him for worrying about something that wouldn’t have made a difference either way. 

Sasuke gave a slow nod of his head. Almost too low for Naruto to hear, he said, “Because Hotaru was so much like you…”

“Like us?”

“Yeah, like…”

“Sasuke?”

“…probably.”


End file.
